I Hit My Wife - Family (16) - Nairaland
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Out Of Rage, I Hit My Mum Yesterday! / I Hit My Husband By Mistake / I Hit My Wife , I Need Help (2) (3) (4)
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| Re: I Hit My Wife by soke02(m): 11:04am On Dec 16, 2019 |
Ur may be looking for an excuse to dump, and u don't what she told her mum and bro b4 they came to ur house without listening to ur own side. 1 Like |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by Otade: 11:05am On Dec 16, 2019 |
Ekene161829: What is wrong is wrong and pls don't let anybody tell you anything else. You were wrong for leaving her @ home with a 7months old child all alone in the house till 2am, if you were a woman would you be happy with such?. On a normal circumstances, that is irresponsible and i can see that you have temper issues. As a man, you should have been expecting a reaction for your actions from her and you should have thought of ways to calm her down before getting home and if it doesn't work keep on apologizing and show remorse for your actions. I see comments of people mentioning the part where they said no third party in the church when getting married, they are right but they have also forgotten to tell you that it is barbaric to slap a breast feeding mother who could not sleep because she misses her husband any was worried if nothing has happened to him. Nobody has monopoly over immaturity, if you are immatured enough to slap her to the point that her lips was bleeding then she should be immatured enough to give you space. Anyways, what is done is done and cannot be reversed, your actions made her make a wrong decision by calling her mother and brother, it would have been better if she called your people. My advice for you is to go apologize and get your family back for life is too short to be unhappy and pls for the sake of your child always learn how to control your temper for there will be more fights, that is why it is called marriage. 2 Likes |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by lele007: 11:06am On Dec 16, 2019 |
Ekene161829: You shouldve done the begging before the keeping quiet, but you were too proud. And you have not told us the whole story. A slap does not split the lip, by the way 1 Like 1 Share |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by kennylesy122(m): 11:06am On Dec 16, 2019 |
LilMissFavvy: See Wetin u dy take U want to start one stupid Feminist shits here abi  He slapped and he begged I repeat he begged. Is Forgiveness a sin again ....normally I hate Night crawlers but you should have give her a call and analysis things with her why w,,,,,,,But calling ur in laws is a very stupid idea....just sent her Apology Texts possible Apology Voice Note And tell her to come home But if she is Forming on silly Femimist....then leave her for Few Days even weeks everyone gats to know is place one day one day Her sense would come back and I hope isn’t to late... but u never have to lay ur hand on a lady again no matter what...that a very Big respect bro1 Like |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by soke02(m): 11:06am On Dec 16, 2019 |
Ur wife may be looking for an excuse to dump, and u don't what she told her mum and bro b4 they came to ur house without listening to ur own side. |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by BRATISLAVA: 11:07am On Dec 16, 2019 |
Ekene161829:I only wish her brother had slapped you in the mouth so that you would bleed and feel the exact same way. You think you're the only one who can't control his physical reaction to anger. You're now a wife beater, though your friends here won't tell you that. You have committed an act of domestic violence, and if your wife wishes to, you can be sent to a police station for that and have a criminal record. 1 Like |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by BluntBoy(m): 11:07am On Dec 16, 2019 |
Ekene161829: This is one-sided. You came home by 2am. That was enough to get anyone who loves you so worked up and at their wit's end. I am sure you would have reacted just like her if the reverse was the case. It is very evident that you didn't handle her outburst very well or with maturity. With that said, I have some questions to ask you. 1. Did you keep contacts with her all the time it was past the time you should have been home? Or did you just leave her in the cold and then surface at 2am? 2. What was your initial reaction that made her start throwing her hands and screaming at you? I am sure she didn't just start screaming at you immediately she saw you. And even if she immediately started screaming at you, how did you interpret it? Did you interpret it as the outburst of a woman who was worried to death that you had not come home after midnight or did you see her outburst as rudeness? Imagine you were the one whose wife was still out after 12am. Would you not be worried to death? And would you not give them some serious lashing immediately you sight them? Some anger are justified. 2 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by oyoolima: 11:07am On Dec 16, 2019 |
ayokemi009: Slapping with bleeding is serious. Outside Nigeria he would be docked for assault Today slap,tomorrow what? Even the worst abusers apologize and cry as if the world is ending and it usually starts with slap,or push and then escalates over the years. She did well to report,so that next time,he will think twice before slapping and rather would leave the house and let her cool off. She was removed from a hostile environment,nothing wrong with that.She wil have time.to review her actions and perhaps learn how to express displeasure better. It is good she has no tolerance to be hit,her family also do not view beating with blood loss as normal. He has described his marriage as amazing,goes to show you his wife must be a reasonable person but for some reason this his 2am return finally loosened a screw in her head. Problem with this is we are responsible for our own actions. If police was called,they would acknowledge she shouted but who laid hands on whom? Plus blood? Since he is older,he should have shown more maturity by seeking to resolve conflict in a less aggressive manner . They'd better sit down and discuss how to manage themselves better or if they want continue being together. 4 Likes |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by oyoolima: 11:08am On Dec 16, 2019 |
Someone should explain what throwing hands means please 1 Like |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by ndidigood(f): 11:08am On Dec 16, 2019 |
freecocoahubby:HV u considered that he didn't tell her before hand or did not pick calls If he didn't do any of this begging is the nest thing BC if anything happened na d woman e go affect most Husband should know how to win My husband knows how to catch me He go say if u know wetin hapun fear go catch u I go shout hei Oya what? He go say hmm By that time I go know say na lie I will start preaching and he will apologize |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by Beezy94(m): 11:08am On Dec 16, 2019 |
Oga as long as u have apologized to her sincerely for slapping her (though is aint right to hit a lady talk more of your dearest wife) don't go and start stressing the apology campaign again because if she accepts it n eventually comes back that mistake on your side will be an Achilles heel they will use and haunt you as long as the marriage is still standing. Remember that is your family not your in-laws family much signs of weakness spells doom, perhaps she was one that provoked all that bruhaha. All these would have been averted if she gave you the silent treatment when you came home late rather she decided to lash out. Ma opinion though. 2 Likes |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by jy2kbeyond(m): 11:09am On Dec 16, 2019 |
LilMissFavvy: Even Adichie your role model dey her husband house on a low key. That woman is destroying many like you.  |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by ndidigood(f): 11:09am On Dec 16, 2019 |
oyoolima:means doing what u can't do to ur sis to somebody sis |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by Nobody: 11:10am On Dec 16, 2019 |
Ladycewhy:and you think it is okay to nag or discuss any reasonable thing with a drunk man? will you confront a mad man in the street because I don't see any difference between the two. a mad man will even be in a better state of mind than a drunk man |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by BRATISLAVA: 11:11am On Dec 16, 2019 |
kennylesy122:will his begging return her blood back to her body? Will it undo the beating? What is sorry when the trust is broken? You people think other people must regard your "begging". You act as if his begging is heaven and Earth. When he was drawing her blood he should've known that begging doesn't heal wounds 1 Like |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by Sukueponmalu: 11:11am On Dec 16, 2019 |
nairalanduseles:I hope you don’t verbally assault the wrong person one day. And end up as ashes |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by Leonel55(m): 11:12am On Dec 16, 2019 |
Marriage, as it is meant to be, is a very complex but yet simple institution that requires a lot of understanding of roles and functions of the parties involved, to make it work As a married man, you coming home that late is a very wrong move. Your wife reacting the way she did, as you described, by nagging all the way, is also a wrong move on her part. You reacting by hitting her is one of the worst moves by a husband in a marriage. Your wife reporting to her family that you hit her is a right move for her and even for you, eventually, if you can get her to forgive you 1. Physical violence, no matter how minute, comes only second to infidelity in breaking the marital bond of Love & trust. Every other thing can be easily forgiven or tolerated in marriage except infidelity and physical violence 2. Most women who have tolerated physical violence without speaking up at the very onset of its occurrence, and who don't have people that can stand up for them, have lived to regret it in their marriage and the husbands, most of whom never intended to, have only gotten worse in repeating the violence 3. As it stands right now, you're moved not just to remorse but also to come to the knowledge of how grave your action was. When, hopefully, she forgives you and agrees to return home, the instinct to hit her again, no matter how provoked, would have been well suppressed by this experience. That's why I said it is also good for you. If I had a chance to talk to your wife about her initial reaction, I would tell her that nagging a man, no matter what he has done is one of the worst moves a woman can make in marriage because it usually makes both the husband and the situation worse: it never corrects anything as intended. Nagging is a married man's worst nightmare, second only to infidelity You should note that the opinion above about nagging does not in any way justify your hitting her. It's just an advice to her and any woman reading to not invite the worst from their husbands by nagging You should keep in mind that the fact that you're stronger than your wife physically does not mean you're to discipline her with physical beating. Never! Your physical strength is actually meant to serve her and the children she has with you, in terms of providing for, and protecting them A husband hitting his wife is like the Army turning its weapons against the citizens. No matter how provoked, an army officer should never raise his/her weapon against a civilian. Same goes for a husband To get your wife back: 1st - You should first talk to God about it in prayer, if you're a believer in God, and ask him to help your wife forgive you and restore the initial love and trust. Then decide within yourself and program your mind that hitting you're wife is never an option going forward. You'll have to think of other civil ways to calm her down in such circumstance: there are ways and they come with knowledge and understanding - find it 2nd - You can give her a few days to calm down and then get one or two of your own family members (father, mother, sibling) to go along with you to plead for her return. Depending on the culture, it could be helpful to go with gifts for her father and mother I pray you find the favour to get your family back God bless! 2 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by nairalanduseles: 11:12am On Dec 16, 2019 |
Sukueponmalu: I am a solid lion man Barbuda Confirmed freedom fighter I bam gidigba |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by Theophinio(m): 11:13am On Dec 16, 2019 |
kulobyno:Op Your answer is here Take it |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by Nobody: 11:13am On Dec 16, 2019 |
nairalanduseles:I won't want anything to do with your likes. I didn't say it is okay to hit your wife. I only say both the verbal and physical assault are wrong |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by mkoabiola: 11:13am On Dec 16, 2019 |
Beating a woman is a NO No for me |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by Ladycewhy(f): 11:13am On Dec 16, 2019 |
luminouz:You just said one thing i want to build on, no one stays out that late out of the blue, there is something the op is not telling us. Just like the other thread where the guy was manipulating the narrative i feel the op too is manipulating this narrative too. For someone like me who is not a night crawler i doubt i will not be on my phone updating my partner of every single thing. The op is not telling it all. Also i just want to say i would be very afraid of a man that makes me bleed in the height of a disagreement. I have seen rage, and its not funny. There are different types but there is the type that the only time they calm down is when they see blood ,either yours or theirs. Which is why i am very skeptical about the op. Contrary to what people think ,it can start at any stage of a person's life, more like a trigger hence the reason i said the op might hence forth feel physical assault is the quickest way to solve his problems. |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by realabraham: 11:14am On Dec 16, 2019 |
yomi007k: You earned my respect! I don't know you but you understand women, or at least, your woman. The irony of life is that men like op can NEVER take a quarter of that from a woman. Too many boys on nairaland, but with you, hope dey. Greetings to your lucky wife. 2 Likes |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by Ayt27(m): 11:14am On Dec 16, 2019 |
Ekene161829: Op,women know how provoke a man can get, they can provoke you, by just singing self and when you react they run and play the victim. While I KNOW that it wasn't your intention to hit your wife, but the heat of the moment caused it and you acknowledge your mistake by apologizing. I would have said be done with the apology and let her do whatever she likes, when she's tired she'll comeback, she probably had been saying she'll show you pepper before you came in her mind, hence the continual raising of voice. I would advise you beg her continually not because of anything but because of your security and safety, "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned", if she wan deal with you she will and for your mind you may think everything is fine. Someone somewhere can finger a woman's brain to turn on her husband and say she's doing it for her kids. Just jejely apologize like mumu, treat her right and maybe not trust her with some information we all know where she will run to with the info. To marry woman no hard but to pursue woman commot for house na him wahala dey. P.S Not in support of your coming in late, you should have told her in advance or update via text but I am not in support of her going to her family after one round. |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by jeff1607(m): 11:14am On Dec 16, 2019 |
CHoccolaTE: sometimes traffic plus work keeps a man outside the home, instead of sleeping at work ,we go home most women easily call it quits even if the man is an angel (no relationship without it's ups n downs ) , I have seen it happen severally only to return wen many water has gone under the bridge. some believe there's a better offer out there or just want the taste of freedom. |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by Ladycewhy(f): 11:16am On Dec 16, 2019 |
niaralandtopuser:Lol ,one way or the other the woman just doesn't escape being blamed by you. If he had killed her or inflicted serious injury on her ,oh well i guess he will still be excused for being drunk. Lets blame it on the alcohol then, case closed. |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by HMarshal(m): 11:17am On Dec 16, 2019 |
1st all any woman who pushes a guy to the point of hitting her, after he has ignored her in evry possible way has a character flaw.there are beta was of showing ur grievance than provoking an assault,u culd punish him witout even being close to him.even u crying or sulking alone suld get him to beg u(Na settle go end am las las) 2ndly 4me, any woman who packs her tins & leaves my house for any reason suld stay away forever. Or will really really beg b4 I accept her back. If she dosnt cum bck to appologise then Ild give it time & file for my kids custody .i will def AV her acct numb & send welfare for the upkeep of my child(ren).because once it's started, it will repeat itself, |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by olab059(m): 11:17am On Dec 16, 2019 |
JubrinElSudan: Exactly. 1 Like |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by Obiworld2020: 11:18am On Dec 16, 2019 |
yomi007k |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by Sammiejokes(m): 11:18am On Dec 16, 2019 |
Ladycewhy: You are using assumptions to make a point. I guess you have irresponsible brothers, I am sure the wife was calling his phone and he did not pick up. You can rant as much as you like it is obvious you are in the same boat with the OPs wife. Ladies that rant in the middle of the night 2AM, everyone has the right to be angry but when you overdo it then its a problem, she needs therapy. The guy has made a terrible mistake, he tried to apologize. He should continue to apologize if he wishes. |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by Nobody: 11:19am On Dec 16, 2019 |
danot1030: You never support any reason? What if she hit first? |
| Re: I Hit My Wife by Nobody: 11:19am On Dec 16, 2019 |
You people should stop this wrong advice you are peddling every where. The wife did the right thing. No amount of provocation should ever make a man lift his hands to hit his wife. I mean none (except in self-defense of course). And vice versa. Men who beat their wives will most likely do it again. I tell ladies while dating, the moment the man hits you, that must be the end of that relationship. Period. That's how those who eventually kill their spouses begin. It is a pathological cycle. Provoke...Beat...apologize...forgive...reconcile...Provoke...Beat...apologize....forgive...reconcile... & .... &.... Provoke...beat...kill... regrets. She did the right thing. The next time your wife provoke you Op, (if she ever comes back) lock yourself up in the room until the two of you calm down. Or simply take a walk and bunk with a male friend. Dupalmer: 1 Like |
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