Please I need your candid advice, I had my first degree in Nigeria, I won a scholarship, now pursuing my masters degree in one of the leading UK Universities, I attended one of the federal universities in south west, toward my graduation, I approach this beautiful, brilliant and intelligent girl that I have been fantasizing our togetherness in marriage, so unfortunate for me that this lady rejected my proposal, I did all I could to convince her to marry me, but all my efforts were in futility, to cut the story short, I moved on, we were level mates, though not departmental mate, and not faculty mate, I knew of her brilliance, and she also knew of my level of academic intelligence, after graduation I used to message her on WhatsApp once in a while to greet her, most especially during festive periods and new months to greet her for new month and new year, but all her late one word responses confirmed to me that she wasn't into me, I gradually reduced the greeting chats until I decided not to send any message to her. Fast forward to last year, I was going to the university library to do some studies, I saw a lady that resembles this particular lady from afar coming out of the library, but I didn't consider putting my mind with the thought that it was just mere distance resemblance, the third step I climbed was a voice from my side saying "Hello" with a finger tap on my arm, I looked into the eyes of the person, it was amazing and surprising that I was greeted by "Favour". We greeted normally and I tried as much as possible not to allow any emotional greetings or talk and not to allow any emotions to becloud my reasonings. I greeted her normally, we exchanged contacts and we departed, I was going to the library for studies, but I could not open a page of my note all I was opening was pages of Favour in my mind, nothing meaningful was gained for almost four hours I stayed in the library, all my thoughts were revolving around Favour, this feelings was greater than ever. But I promised myself not to make any call to her or send any message, I wasn't treated well back in Nigeria when I was doing that, so I made up my mind not to call or text her. Around 9:00pm on the same day, I received a WhatsApp message from her, she greeted me and we discussed for a lengthy time at the detriment of my time. It was during the course of the conversion that I got to know that she won the same scholarship I won in the same year she won hers, we were both happy with ourselves, to cut the story short, as I have determined not to call her or text, after three days, she called me that she'll like us to meet at the corridor of her department, but I declined the request, turning down her request wasn't really coming from my heart, but I needed to regain my manly respect. She asked for the reason for not coming, I told her that our departments are far apart, the call ended on a good note. I got home thinking, contemplating whether I haven't overdo, but I summoned courage. For more than a month, I didn't call or text, all our conversion and discussions were initiated by her, on a particular Saturday, she called me and requested for us to meet and have time together, we met at a cafeteria, she paid for everything we ate, and I asked her to permit me to take my leave after being together for more than one hour, what we discussed was on the rigour and stress that we passed through in winning the scholarship and other things related to schooling in UK, the discussion of the our experiences were interesting to the both party. I took my leave as we had handshakes, she was starring at me as I was going, I looked at her face and caught her red handed, but she pretended not to be looking at me, since all these days I called her twice to initiate talks, after some periods of time there was a break in communication, for almost two weeks we didn't chat and we didn't discuss on phone, I was kinda afraid, thinking maybe she was tired of doing the callings, fortunately, I received her call after thirteen days checking through my call/chat records with her, after this, a day can hardly pass without calling me for at least three time on an average, also, she checks my WhatsApp status every now and then, and she'll always comment on them, I still have deep feelings for this lady, I'm not in any serious relationship, and with what I could deduce from our conversation, I think she's not in a relationship, I'm 60% confident that she really wants me to reshoot my shot. Which I'm actually considering as well, but I'm trying to give it a reasonable time and more conviction because ladies can be funny sometimes. To be honest, her thoughts of affections and feelings have being affecting my academic performance, I couldn't read for 6 straight hours, my reading time has dropped drastically, always thinking of her, my white friends in the department told me to do the necessary on time to remain focus with my academics, but a close friend from Nigeria though senior colleague that won same scholarship told me to still be patient. But her thoughts and feelings have overwhelmed my emotion. What can you advice me to do Nairalanders, I need to make a good grade in my masters, and if this thought should continue more than necessary, this may not be possible. Your advice is needed please.

Did any of you ever watch this movie

I am coming back

Modified: I am back

Listen young man, never ask her out again, I repeat, never ask out again, you will regret it.

It is time for you now to play hard to get. Flirt with her, tease her, but never stoop so low as to ask her out. Not anymore! Just build attraction, make her chase you like crazy, but never talk relationship with her. Keep confusing her until she could not take it anymore and start begging you to date her.

You have your balls back now, don't be foolish enough to hand it to her on a platter of gold just because of one foolish emotions.

Let her work hard to get you so she can value you more. She did not send you while you were in Nigeria because you were cheap and readily available to her.
Be sendless! Be a scarce commodity and watch your value sky rockets.

She has given you all the green light, yet you are still tossing her. Those who advised you to shoot your shot are right, however it seems you are no longer interested in the lady, and very soon she will lose interest and move on.

All the signs that you should try again are there...for your sanity and concentration in your studies I think you should too. Heck even fate wants you guys to be together hence the chance meet up in a foreign land.. Go for it bro ASAP.

The organizer of your scholarship send your abroad to school so as to contribute to our country development.
Please face yar study

Not that I'm not interested, I still love her as I have said, what is delaying me is: why did she suddenly pick interest in me despite all the efforts I made to have her in Nigeria? Wasn't she seeing good future in me while I was still in Nigeria? Is she now seeing compatibility in our tomorrow due to the present location of the two of us? These are the things delaying me not to do the necessary, I want to be sure she's not loving me based on what she's seeing.

Ucheraymond:
All the signs that you should try again are there...for your sanity and concentration in your studies I think you should too. Heck even fate wants you guys to be together hence the chance meet up in a foreign land.. Go for it bro ASAP.

Thanks, I was also having the thought that it wasn't a mere coincidence.

Argon18:
Please I need your candid advice, I had my first degree in Nigeria, I won a scholarship, now pursuing my masters degree in one of the leading UK Universities, I attended one of the federal universities in south west, toward my graduation, I approach this beautiful, brilliant and intelligent girl that I have been fantasizing our togetherness in marriage, so unfortunate for me that this lady rejected my proposal, I did all I could to convince her to marry me, but all my efforts were in futility, to cut the story short, I moved on, we were level mates, though not departmental mate, and not faculty mate, I knew of her brilliance, and she also knew of my level of academic intelligence, after graduation I used to message her on WhatsApp once in a while to greet her, most especially during festive periods and new months to greet her for new month and new year, but all her late one word responses confirmed to me that she wasn't into me, I gradually reduced the greeting chats until I decided not to send any message to her. Fast forward to last year, I was going to the university library to do some studies, I saw a lady that resembles this particular lady from afar coming out of the library, but I didn't consider putting my mind with the thought that it was just mere distance resemblance, the third step I climbed was a voice from my side saying "Hello" with a finger tap on my arm, I looked into the eyes of the person, it was amazing and surprising that I was greeted by "Favour". We greeted normally and I tried as much as possible not to allow any emotional greetings or talk and not to allow any emotions to becloud my reasonings. I greeted her normally, we exchanged contacts and we departed, I was going to the library for studies, but I could not open a page of my note all I was opening was pages of Favour in my mind, nothing meaningful was gained for almost four hours I stayed in the library, all my thoughts were revolving around Favour, this feelings was greater than ever. But I promised myself not to make any call to her or send any message, I wasn't treated well back in Nigeria when I was doing that, so I made up my mind not to call or text her. Around 9:00pm on the same day, I received a WhatsApp message from her, she greeted me and we discussed for a lengthy time at the detriment of my time. It was during the course of the conversion that I got to know that she won the same scholarship I won in the same year she won hers, we were both happy with ourselves, to cut the story short, as I have determined not to call her or text, after three days, she called me that she'll like us to meet at the corridor of her department, but I declined the request, turning down her request wasn't really coming from my heart, but I needed to regain my manly respect. She asked for the reason for not coming, I told her that our departments are far apart, the call ended on a good note. I got home thinking, contemplating whether I haven't overdo, but I summoned courage. For more than a month, I didn't call or text, all our conversion and discussions were initiated by her, on a particular Saturday, she called me and requested for us to meet and have time together, we met at a cafeteria, she paid for everything we ate, and I asked her to permit me to take my leave after being together for more than one hour, what we discussed was on the rigour and stress that we passed through in winning the scholarship and other things related to schooling in UK, the discussion of the our experiences were interesting to the both party. I took my leave as we had handshakes, she was starring at me as I was going, I looked at her face and caught her red handed, but she pretended not to be looking at me, since all these days I called her twice to initiate talks, after some periods of time there was a break in communication, for almost two weeks we didn't chat and we didn't discuss on phone, I was kinda afraid, thinking maybe she was tired of doing the callings, fortunately, I received her call after thirteen days checking through my call/chat records with her, after this, a day can hardly pass without calling me for at least three time on an average, also, she checks my WhatsApp status every now and then, and she'll always comment on them, I still have deep feelings for this lady, I'm not in any serious relationship, and with what I could deduce from our conversation, I think she's not in a relationship, I'm 60% confident that she really wants me to reshoot my shot. Which I'm actually considering as well, but I'm trying to give it a reasonable time and more conviction because ladies can be funny sometimes. To be honest, her thoughts of affections and feelings have being affecting my academic performance, I couldn't read for 6 straight hours, my reading time has dropped drastically, always thinking of her, my white friends in the department told me to do the necessary on time to remain focus with my academics, but a close friend from Nigeria though senior colleague that won same scholarship told me to still be patient. But her thoughts and feelings have overwhelmed my emotion. What can you advice me to do Nairalanders, I need to make a good grade in my masters, and if this thought should continue more than necessary, this may not be possible. Your advice is needed please.

well one thing I've known over time is that it ain't easy for a Nigerian girl to find love when they travel abroad even the beautiful ones (tho I might be wrong though) but about 4 I know now really ain't into relationships when they got abroad and these were hot classy girls when they were in school every guys wanna go after

well that aside, firstly, I do think destiny might have brought you both together someway, somehow

secondly, just like my assumptions up there it's probably nur easy for her to find a reasonable guy over there and ur her best chance atm

Bros calm down. Maintain your 'manly' attitude.

That lady is just bored and needs someone to talk to.

Ask yourself, if you were in Nigeria, would she have given you attention? Hell No.

I can place a bet that if you ask her out again so quickly, she will still turn you down and if perhaps she doesn't, she's just 'managing' you. Trust me

If I were you, I'll keep being friends with her, till she can't do without me, have sex with her till she becomes obsessed with you. That's how to pay back!!

I vote story 2. It is more literary rich

Na novel you wan write, too long.

Don't really have anything to contribute...

But I hope I get a scholarship to leave this country one day too...

Tell her you still have feelings for her, before another man does it before you which you would end up regretting. Tell her your mind and know what's in her mind.
Never make the mistake of allowing it to distract your studies, there are better things to come.

Argon18:
Not that I'm not interested, I still love her as I have said, what is delaying me is: why did she suddenly pick interest in me despite all the efforts I made to have her in Nigeria? Wasn't she seeing good future in me while I was still in Nigeria? Is she now seeing compatibility in our tomorrow due to the present location of the two of us? These are the things delaying me not to do the necessary, I want to be sure she's not loving me based on what she's seeing.

she is just trying to be around you since u are both in better place...such girls do believe more in themselves. just continue d friendship with since she Neva gave u any emotional feelings in Nigeria. don't trust her much

Keep being confused, keep misplacing your priorities, and don't focus on your studies. When you fail, you will explain to your children why you screwed up something important for a girl that didn't marry you, give you the p-sleeve but gave others, and ended up with someone else. Go son!

Oh my! Wonderful love story i just read.


Op better man up, This is not some kinda Beauty and The Beast world were living in, better face real life realities and focus on your studies overseas.

Argon18:
Not that I'm not interested, I still love her as I have said, what is delaying me is: why did she suddenly pick interest in me despite all the efforts I made to have her in Nigeria? Wasn't she seeing good future in me while I was still in Nigeria? Is she now seeing compatibility in our tomorrow due to the present location of the two of us? These are the things delaying me not to do the necessary, I want to be sure she's not loving me based on what she's seeing.

If you still have feelings for her, give her a second chance.

Call the lady the minute you read this and tell her that you still want her. No rehearsals. No drama. The time for her to be your woman is now.

Wait no further.

better focus on what u went to the uk to do.it wont be good if u flunked ur studies cos of pussy and u now went back to naija with nothing

Op, you must be seriously joking if you think i will read all these.

Mscheeeeeeeew

SLAP44:
Did any of you ever watch this movie

My favorite movie that year. Baba died untop women matter

Argon18:
Not that I'm not interested, I still love her as I have said, what is delaying me is: why did she suddenly pick interest in me despite all the efforts I made to have her in Nigeria? Wasn't she seeing good future in me while I was still in Nigeria? Is she now seeing compatibility in our tomorrow due to the present location of the two of us? These are the things delaying me not to do the necessary, I want to be sure she's not loving me based on what she's seeing.

why u so naive
u were in naija she was ignoring u and now u are in the uk she is now signifying interest
so u telling me u dont know the reason? do i need to spell it out?
are u not a naija guy?
abeg stop behaving like a kenyan dude
focus on your studies and while you are at it u can make friends with any of the ladies around you in the uk..or are there no females in the uk?
dont let this girl distract u biko

.

Octopusssy:
Op, you must be seriously joking if you think i will read all these.

Mscheeeeeeeew

Your comment could really go a long way, kindly read.

I beg you in the name of God, don't let her becloud/muddle up your thinking/studies

Focus....if that's not possible, shoot your shot for the last time.


My own koko is you must come out in flying colors in your Masters; Resources, efforts and prayers put into it must not go in vain because of a lady.

Your Future First!!!

Argon18:
Please I need your candid advice, I had my first degree in Nigeria, I won a scholarship, now pursuing my masters degree in one of the leading UK Universities, I attended one of the federal universities in south west, toward my graduation, I approach this beautiful, brilliant and intelligent girl that I have been fantasizing our togetherness in marriage, so unfortunate for me that this lady rejected my proposal, I did all I could to convince her to marry me, but all my efforts were in futility, to cut the story short, I moved on, we were level mates, though not departmental mate, and not faculty mate, I knew of her brilliance, and she also knew of my level of academic intelligence, after graduation I used to message her on WhatsApp once in a while to greet her, most especially during festive periods and new months to greet her for new month and new year, but all her late one word responses confirmed to me that she wasn't into me, I gradually reduced the greeting chats until I decided not to send any message to her. Fast forward to last year, I was going to the university library to do some studies, I saw a lady that resembles this particular lady from afar coming out of the library, but I didn't consider putting my mind with the thought that it was just mere distance resemblance, the third step I climbed was a voice from my side saying "Hello" with a finger tap on my arm, I looked into the eyes of the person, it was amazing and surprising that I was greeted by "Favour". We greeted normally and I tried as much as possible not to allow any emotional greetings or talk and not to allow any emotions to becloud my reasonings. I greeted her normally, we exchanged contacts and we departed, I was going to the library for studies, but I could not open a page of my note all I was opening was pages of Favour in my mind, nothing meaningful was gained for almost four hours I stayed in the library, all my thoughts were revolving around Favour, this feelings was greater than ever. But I promised myself not to make any call to her or send any message, I wasn't treated well back in Nigeria when I was doing that, so I made up my mind not to call or text her. Around 9:00pm on the same day, I received a WhatsApp message from her, she greeted me and we discussed for a lengthy time at the detriment of my time. It was during the course of the conversion that I got to know that she won the same scholarship I won in the same year she won hers, we were both happy with ourselves, to cut the story short, as I have determined not to call her or text, after three days, she called me that she'll like us to meet at the corridor of her department, but I declined the request, turning down her request wasn't really coming from my heart, but I needed to regain my manly respect. She asked for the reason for not coming, I told her that our departments are far apart, the call ended on a good note. I got home thinking, contemplating whether I haven't overdo, but I summoned courage. For more than a month, I didn't call or text, all our conversion and discussions were initiated by her, on a particular Saturday, she called me and requested for us to meet and have time together, we met at a cafeteria, she paid for everything we ate, and I asked her to permit me to take my leave after being together for more than one hour, what we discussed was on the rigour and stress that we passed through in winning the scholarship and other things related to schooling in UK, the discussion of the our experiences were interesting to the both party. I took my leave as we had handshakes, she was starring at me as I was going, I looked at her face and caught her red handed, but she pretended not to be looking at me, since all these days I called her twice to initiate talks, after some periods of time there was a break in communication, for almost two weeks we didn't chat and we didn't discuss on phone, I was kinda afraid, thinking maybe she was tired of doing the callings, fortunately, I received her call after thirteen days checking through my call/chat records with her, after this, a day can hardly pass without calling me for at least three time on an average, also, she checks my WhatsApp status every now and then, and she'll always comment on them, I still have deep feelings for this lady, I'm not in any serious relationship, and with what I could deduce from our conversation, I think she's not in a relationship, I'm 60% confident that she really wants me to reshoot my shot. Which I'm actually considering as well, but I'm trying to give it a reasonable time and more conviction because ladies can be funny sometimes. To be honest, her thoughts of affections and feelings have being affecting my academic performance, I couldn't read for 6 straight hours, my reading time has dropped drastically, always thinking of her, my white friends in the department told me to do the necessary on time to remain focus with my academics, but a close friend from Nigeria though senior colleague that won same scholarship told me to still be patient. But her thoughts and feelings have overwhelmed my emotion. What can you advice me to do Nairalanders, I need to make a good grade in my masters, and if this thought should continue more than necessary, this may not be possible. Your advice is needed please.

oga, if u don't want to tell her how u feel, face ya studies biko

Martinez39:
Keep being confused, keep misplacing your priorities, and don't focus on your studies. When you fail, you will explain to your children why you screwed up something important for a girl that didn't marry you, give you the p-sleeve but gave others, and ended up with someone else. Go son!

I appreciate your comment though harsh kinda, but the truth lies in the lines, I will focus on my studies, in fact I must. One of my targets is to start my PhD immediately after my masters, and coming out with the required grade is paramount, not willing and wishing to do any other masters again. Thanks boss.

Argon18:


Your comment could really go a long way, kindly read.

For me to do that you will need punctuations and paragraphs in your op.