Falling Out Of Love - Family - Nairaland
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| Falling Out Of Love by ebonyvibe(f): 2:12pm On Dec 14, 2010 |
I have falling out of love with my hubby and he has seriously tried to make amends but it doest seem to help. I caught him cheating once but honestly I have gotten over that. I am seriously contemplating divorce but I am thinking am I too hasty but i have been thinking this for two years dont know if i should go for it or not. I have my reasons many I cant say here but i am really unhappy within my soul. Constructive advice please 1 Like |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by Odunnu: 2:37pm On Dec 14, 2010 |
This is serious! You've been habouring this thought for 2 years?Have u been living with him all thru this period? |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by ebonyvibe(f): 2:40pm On Dec 14, 2010 |
I havent harbour anything he is well aware of the situation. I am just contemplating wheather me not leaving is out of fear of being alone or pity. I know it is not because of love |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by queenafric(f): 2:45pm On Dec 14, 2010 |
In as much as i'm a strong advocate of ''till death do us part'', i still wouldnt advise people to stay in a loveless marriage and be unhappy. That is why it is important to be very very sure b4 one says ''I do''. |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by MissyB3(f): 2:48pm On Dec 14, 2010 |
Take this to the Family section, if you want effective advice. |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by Odunnu: 2:53pm On Dec 14, 2010 |
Yea, i was goin to suggest that |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by MrCork23: 2:58pm On Dec 14, 2010 |
ebonyvibe: ***at last, I can move in  *** |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by Nobody: 4:58pm On Dec 14, 2010 |
@poster - can you take care of yourself? - is there children involved? - how old are you and how long have you been married? |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by ifyalways(f): 6:14pm On Dec 14, 2010 |
ebonyvibe:2 years is such a long time to have such a thing in mind. Whatever your reasons are,are u really sure things cant be mended,is it beyond repair? Please consider and re-consider seriously,whatever that made your feelings for your hubby change.Or could it be that u guys are growing apart?Lost communication,shared interests?? IMO, you can lust over/get infatuated with someone, cool off,come back and rekindle those feelings; No Stress but, love is different,It's an action not a feeling. It takes effort and time to build it,u gotta work on it daily to keep it going.If u try harder (if u still want to make it work)u might regain some lost feelings and emotions by really working on the relationship,allowing yourself to be happy and not full of doubts. Have u ever discussed this with your hubby? |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by Nobody: 6:28pm On Dec 14, 2010 |
@@ |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by deniyor: 6:38pm On Dec 14, 2010 |
Leave. Bye Bye! |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by mutter(f): 12:41am On Dec 15, 2010 |
Ifyalways is right. You can make it work. Marriage is sometimes like that. Some fine day I can get up and think of what my husband did that hurt me, then I pile one on the other, and before you know it I pick up the phone and say, "I`ve had it, I need a divorce". another fine day I get up and think about the so many wonderful things he has done, I pick up the phone and say, " Thank you for being the most wonderful husband in the world and for loving me so much." The mind can easily be steered and it depends on the way you do it. If you want to make it work. it often does work, |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by Outstrip(f): 3:00am On Dec 15, 2010 |
I think there is more to it that she is not saying. If we go by just what you have there then my dear try to work it out. There might still be some lack of communication if after 2 years you still are feeling this way. Marriage is a loooooooooooooooooooong time. You cannot be in love every minute of it. Have you guys had professional counseling? |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by TEXASGIRL(f): 3:37am On Dec 15, 2010 |
In marriage love is a choice you have to make everyday. The grass may seem greener on the other side, but rarely is it. Good luck. |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by strangerf: 9:17am On Dec 15, 2010 |
@ Blazay Arrantus Nonensicus |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by Blazay1: 9:36am On Dec 15, 2010 |
^^^ You talking yourself?  |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by Blazay1: 9:39am On Dec 15, 2010 |
>>>>>> |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by fstranger1: 9:42am On Dec 15, 2010 |
I saw what you wrote for this thread and wanted to comment on it as nonsense. however, to my surprise your comment was no where to be found on the thread So I copied it by clicking on your screen name, and then I got spam-botted! Didnt know you copy and paste your comments form the internet! Good riddance to your rubbish. |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by Blazay1: 9:54am On Dec 15, 2010 |
>>>>> |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by Blazay1: 10:11am On Dec 15, 2010 |
>>>>>> |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by Outstrip(f): 4:18pm On Dec 15, 2010 |
This pastor needs to grow up. He has to learn to control his p e nis. Was he not the one that was caught having a party or something like that. He should not judge people by his inability to control himself sexually. He is having sex with his wife and other men yet he wants to tell people to get off facebook. He should focus on himself. The average committed married person does not go to facebook to pick up people to sleep with. The man is just a sexual deviant and he thinks everybody else thinks like him |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by ebonyvibe(f): 4:22pm On Dec 15, 2010 |
Thanks to all the contributions especially Ify. I have never cheated on my husband and my feelings are not brought on by outside distractions neither do I frequent facebook. They are more of my expectations of him that he not leaving to and I dont mean financially ie going out at night, smoking (dont mean cigarette) etc. And quite frankly I am feed up. He loves me and wants me to love the way he is but i am done loving the person i want him to be and waking up to find the person he is. I went into the marriage with my eyes opened and am a typical case of i thought he was going to change |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by Outstrip(f): 4:28pm On Dec 15, 2010 |
Well that behavior probably helped contributed to the cheating in the first place. I guess I don't get his need to go out at night. I don't get it even for single people. As for the smoking it is an addiction. He will need a lot of support to kick the habit. Does he know that you are considering leaving him? Maybe he needs to know that. If he has cheated before and he wants you to totally trust him then he should know that giving up partying is just the first step in showing you that the marriage is important to him. Do you have kids? |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by ifyalways(f): 4:32pm On Dec 15, 2010 |
^ You have said it all. |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by Blazay(m): 5:09pm On Dec 15, 2010 |
ebonyvibe: Case dismissed. This court is adjoined for ever. Go to the cashier and pay the necessary fines for wasting the taxpayers' money. whispers. . .i knew she got married out of desperation and not out of love.  Gavel pounds! |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by ebonyvibe(f): 5:17pm On Dec 15, 2010 |
@ Blazay I would rather you didnt paste ridiculous comments this is surpposed to be a forum that gave constructive advice. Since I cant go to the past and change it how does your comment help? Dont know if you are married but if you are you know that feelings change this swings at different level from relationship to relationship but it changes. Correction i didnt marry out of desperation as I was quite young didnt marry for money either as i am doing well. I married my husband cos i loved him and naively thought i could change him stone me if that is such a great offence. |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by Blazay(m): 5:28pm On Dec 15, 2010 |
Just because. . . .  |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by deniyor: 5:53pm On Dec 15, 2010 |
I don't think its ever a good idea to marry anyone for who you want them to be. Assess them b4 marriage, and then know what you see is what you get. Lady, If you are not ready to work things out with your husband (you hv to be willing else every advice here is a waste of time), get your divorce. Be done and over with it. When reality kicks in for you, then you will know there isn't much out there for you. |
| Re: Falling Out Of Love by Blazay(m): 5:57pm On Dec 15, 2010 |
Just because. . . . |
etc. And quite frankly I am fede up.Please Help Me / How To Collect Money You Lent To A Friend / 10 Things Wives Should Stop Doing.
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