If fund is d problem,u both can go for indoor traditional wedding and church wedding

Onego:
that is what I told him,he was just giving me excuses about what some old men told him about the danger of court wedding

If you can't acept the traditional,step forward....he will accept court marriage only if his mad!

wtf is church wedding? certificate is still from the court

There is more to this. How much does church wedding cost that he is refusing court wedding too?

Traditional wedding is the deal we know but legally if something happens... E.g maybe u both need to travel as a spouse, or official documents requires both spouse to do something, sharing of property in casenof death or divorce, the truyh is u can't do any of these... U know wh? U can't be regarded as legally married because you don't have a marriage certificate. Until you HV that which is given at the marriage registry or a licenced place of worship... u can't be said to be legally married.

So technically you need both traditional and secondly you both need to go to the marriage registery and do the needful.

If u want more on this issue let me know.

Monaco2:
Since u want white weeding so bad, u should fund it na abi Na only man money dem Dey use do weeding?!?

She said church or court? Court costs next to nothing

Onego:
Good day every one, I have been dating this guy for more than 3years,we have been through a lot but glory to God we have overcome.He really wants us to get married this year,but there is an issue which we have been battling which is he wants to do only traditional wedding, but I as a person I give him option which is traditional, court or church wedding, but he said no he is only going to do traditional because of fund.Right now he is treating to walk away if I don't agree. Am confuse what should I do? Thanks

It seems like a red flag. Why is he running from a court wedding? He's going into the marriage with reservations. He just as well sign a prenup.

The fact that he is threatening you is a bad sign. You should not agree with something you are not comfortable with.

Besides, you need a valid marriage certificate. For instance, just to change the name of my account/bvn to reflect my new name, I had to submit copies of my marriage cert, newspaper publication, etc to the bank. Or is it traditional marriage pictures you will show when you are asked for documents/proof? Especially for travel purposes.


Let him do the needful properly if he has nothing to hide.

ImaIma1:


She said church or court? Court costs next to nothing

Since it doesn’t costs much, I see no reason y she is complaining, all she need do is tell her fiancé she will pay for it

Monaco2:



Since it doesn’t costs much, I see no reason y she is complaining, all she need do is tell her fiancé she will pay for it

The money is not the issue for him. It's the idea of a court wedding that is his problem.

It is simple .. just tell your parent any of them you are close about it and let them add at as part of the conditions he must abide to before they can give you out to him in marriage .. then you should desist from forcing him about it or talking about it .. Even when he speaks about just assure your guy you are in support of traditional marriage only but your dad is a stubborn stone to break and plead with your guy persuade him with your love that he is your all and all .. He will accept out of love for you but they way you are going about it arguing with him about it .. Will make him feel you have something ulterior you are planning to achieve .. Just let it be your parent forcing him about it you can even display a charade in front of him and your parent telling them they have to accept what your man can offer which is the traditional marriage but your parent won’t accept and will persuade that no one marries in your family like that he have to accept to having the traditional , court and church marriage . But note ..if he does not accept because of the finances involved in the church marriage process then your parent should compel him to do the traditional and court .. Just make sure you are in support of your man on these topic why your parent do the job of forcing him into the 3 process .. Plan it with your parent they know what to do when it comes to that let it be your parent presenting it to him and not you anymore ..

Onego:
thank you, not that am asking for a party,I can do indoor wedding, I just want a proof that am married

Court wedding is your only protection. Use your head.

ImaIma1:


The money is not the issue for him. It's the idea of a court wedding that is his problem.

U can’t be so sure cause she said either court or church weeding, she did Not say it must be a court weeding..... what I’m thinking is maybe she wants different days for the whole thing. Probably after the traditional marriage, then a few days later then the white weeding will take place which means another food n drinks, I think that’s y d guy is sticking to only traditional marriage

Nairalandmonika:
He's not serious, does Court marriage require funds

Yes it does, you pay about 21K then they still hassle you to bring 2 crates of malt, 2 bottles of wine etc

Onego:
Good day every one, I have been dating this guy for more than 3years,we have been through a lot but glory to God we have overcome.He really wants us to get married this year,but there is an issue which we have been battling which is he wants to do only traditional wedding, but I as a person I give him option which is traditional, court or church wedding, but he said no he is only going to do traditional because of fund.Right now he is treating to walk away if I don't agree. Am confuse what should I do? Thanks

U will not do one now...... Letter u will say he is not showing sign of commitment....

How many white doz traditional wedding? Una go just dry follow white pple up and down cooy copy..... Do watin he agree to do or u take his second option which is walk away, remember, its not a do or die thing

doublegoldcrown:

Court wedding is your only protection. Use your head.

Protection from what?

So that she can frame the certificate and claim she is the only legal wife abi

Onego:
Good day every one, I have been dating this guy for more than 3years,we have been through a lot but glory to God we have overcome.He really wants us to get married this year,but there is an issue which we have been battling which is he wants to do only traditional wedding, but I as a person I give him option which is traditional, court or church wedding, but he said no he is only going to do traditional because of fund.Right now he is treating to walk away if I don't agree. Am confuse what should I do? Thanks

Court or Church wedding as you call it, favours women more. Pretty sure he is aware of the cons dat is why he insists on traditional marriage only. U might just hv to give in or walk away.

MarianaTrench:


Protection from what?

So that she can frame the certificate and claim she is the only legal wife abi

Obviously you don't understand, run along now

Monaco2:



U can’t be so sure cause she said either court or church weeding, she did Not say it must be a court weeding..... what I’m thinking is maybe she wants different days for the whole thing. Probably after the traditional marriage, then a few days later then the white weeding will take place which means another food n drinks, I think that’s y d guy is sticking to only traditional marriage

She commented on the thread about it. She opted for court because it's not expensive but according to him, some elders advised him against a court wedding.

MarianaTrench:


Yes it does, you pay about 21K then they still hassle you to bring 2 crates of malt, 2 bottles of wine etc

21k should not be a big deal for someone that wants to get married. What court is that where they hassle you to buy drinks. We didn't hear of that when we got married. And it can't be mandatory.

and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh'.
A tradtional wedding is something that is culturally recognised even God hand dey inside...o.p so ur own view of marriage is certification ànd prove? Prove of what pricisely?...

ImaIma1:


She commented on the thread about it. She opted for court because it's not expensive but according to him, some elders advised him against a court wedding.

Ok but if that’s d case y is she insisting on court weeding, they can also take the ring to church n have her pastor bless the ring for them, it will be simple too

Monaco2:



Ok but if that’s d case y is she insisting on court weeding, they can also take the ring to church n have her pastor bless the ring for them, it will be simple too

To be legally married, you need a marriage certificate. It's either from the court or a licensed church.

ImaIma1:


To be legally married, you need a marriage certificate. It's either from the court or a licensed church.

I hope people understand that u are legally married if ur dowry has been paid?!? Since the guy does not want to have anything to do with court she should be understanding n go to a licensed church na

Why are you insisting on court wedding when he wants to marry the traditional way?

The more you try to talk him into court wedding, the more he will think you have other plans.


Most communities now give legal certificates when you get married the traditional way

ImaIma1:


To be legally married, you need a marriage certificate. It's either from the court or a licensed church.

Some communities now give legal marriage certificate

Monaco2:


I hope people understand that u are legally married if ur dowry has been paid?!? Since the guy does not want to have anything to do with court she should be understanding n go to a licensed church na

That's wrong, dowry or bride price doesn't make you legally married, it makes you traditionally married. For instance when you go to a consulate or embassy and you're asked to bring a proof of marriage, they expect a legal certificate from a certified court, not tubers of yam, or your dowry. Or is it dowry tou will show the newspapers when you want to effect a change of name?

Lostz:

Some communities now give legal marriage certificate

That can be used at an embassy? And at the bank?

Is it from a court?

Marriage is headed for the rocks

ImaIma1:


That can be used at an embassy? And at the bank?

Is it from a court?

don't know Sha since I'm not married. But they partner with the local government

MRosario:
That's wrong, dowry or bride price doesn't make you legally married, it makes you traditionally married. For instance when you go to a consulate or embassy and you're asked to bring a proof of marriage, they expect a legal certificate from a certified court, not tubers of yam, or your dowry. Or is it dowry tou will show the newspapers when you want to effect a change of name?

People who wed in the church also get that certificate so y is she insisting on court weeding?!?

When there are threats on mode of marital rites, especially threat to leave, it is a big red flag,

My advice; you both are not meant to be, so he can buzz off, you will be fine.

Lostz:
don't know Sha since I'm not married. But they partner with the local government

Why would one go for a community certificate that will be looked down on when they can go for the real deal.

I don't understand the running away from court by some men. We did the whole thing...trad, court, church...

I don't believe the couple should give themselves problems over getting married coupled with the other issues they will have to deal with from family and inlaws. They need to be in agreement.