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How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? - Romance - Nairaland

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How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by HeavenlyCherub(f): 11:03pm On May 28, 2020
Hello,

I’m just trying to gain insight from those who are married and others alike.

OPTION 1

Exception: Both of you keep the money you had prior to the marriage.

Option 1 there’s no his money and my money, you are 1. All income earned goes into the home.

So in this case all our income will go into a joint account (account A). From that account there will be a transfer of money out into
1. My separate account
2. His separate account
3. Our joint savings account

Amounts that go into 1 and 2 will be equal.

We spend on bills etc from account A. We will discuss jointly on lavish spending from account A e.g. vacations and kids stuff.

Whatever happens in account 1 is my business, no questions asked. If I save it all and want to buy an island fine. If I want to give my friends money, fine. Its from my allowance, not from the home.


OPTION 2

You both put in a percentage of your income into the joint account and keep a %. For example that if 1 brings in $100,000 a month and you bring $50,000.. both will agree to 10% of their individual earnings for the joint account.

OPTION 3

One spouse keeps both salaries and disburses it when it is needed.

I’m just curious. What method works for you?
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by Ladylite: 11:13pm On May 28, 2020
Separate accounts works but there should be a joint account for the family house needs.

But feel it's based on who earns more and the vision of the family.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by Ningen(m): 11:20pm On May 28, 2020
Ladies and gents, I am here to support option 3.

To avoid stories that touch & shedding of tears, I believe operating seperate account is the best.

Your money is yours and my money is mine. undecided
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by Abfinest007(m): 11:23pm On May 28, 2020
Marriage marriage
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by HeavenlyCherub(f): 11:24pm On May 28, 2020
Ningen:
Ladies and gents, I am here to support option 3.

To avoid stories that touch & shading of tears, I believe operating seperate account is the best.

Your money is yours and my money is mine. undecided

If you don’t mind me asking. Are you male or female?

You would want your spouse to give you their paycheck monthly or you will be the one to give yours?
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by HeavenlyCherub(f): 11:32pm On May 28, 2020
Abfinest007:
Marriage marriage

It’s a typo sir. People make mistakes.thank you for correction. You read my whole post and that’s what you were able to pick... hmm
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by HeavenlyCherub(f): 11:33pm On May 28, 2020
Abfinest007:
Marriage marriage

Gist me now.. lol
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by Ningen(m): 11:37pm On May 28, 2020
HeavenlyCherub:


If you don’t mind me asking. Are you male or female?

You would want your spouse to give you their paycheck monthly or you will be the one to give yours?

I'll be the one to give my paychecks if required.

1 Like

Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by CsRockefeller(m): 12:01am On May 29, 2020
I have a different approach as an Economist /Accountant.

The plan:

I have my personal account, she has hers. She's definitely gonna be doing something (can't marry an unemployed lady)

We create a budget for the year (expenses, revenue). In the expenses sheet, we are gonna allocate tasks to each one (probably on a % basis). I may handle rent and groceries, she may handle light bill, refreshments, toiletries and other miscellaneous. These would be done after first line deductions like transport fare/fuel to work, tax and pension.

The most important comes here: We would have a joint account where each of us transfers a certain amount or % of our income to after necessary expenses have been deducted. This account would serve as a savings/investment account for our building plans, assets purchases, children's school fees, business plans, travel plans, borrowings to friends and relatives to mention but a few. More like what the ECA is to the FG.

If she has a biz, or we both have a biz or any of us has a biz, there would be slight changes in the account configuration.

Having a joint account isn't much of a problem, d issue is good financial plan with the discipline it requires. If both of us make 200k a month and after tax and pension, it comes to 150k, we need to have known what our monthly expense is (this gets bigger as children sets in). If 80k is required to run the home and work for a month, then we plough the profit of 70k into our joint account.

When I got my first professional job of a 40k, I made sure that 25k goes to my savings/investment account with Mansard insurance leaving me with 15k for my expenses each month. In that 15k, 10k was for my transport and feeding, while d 5k was for other miscellaneous. If I wanted to buy clothes, and other important purchases, I fell back to my Mansard account.

Everyone should learn budgeting, it's important.

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by HeavenlyCherub(f): 12:17am On May 29, 2020
CsRockefeller:
I have a different approach as an Economist /Accountant.

Enlighten me
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by Paramount01(m): 12:18am On May 29, 2020
CsRockefeller:
I have a different approach as an Economist /Accountant.

Let hear it
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by Baloranking(m): 12:30am On May 29, 2020
The second idea is great for me tongue but women of these days will abuse you for regulating the finances instead they prefer you do everything while they keep their money

2 Likes

Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by CsRockefeller(m): 12:32am On May 29, 2020
Paramount01:


Let hear it

I have modified my post.
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by bigpicture001: 8:44am On Jun 24, 2020
I am exactly at this point with my soon to b married gf. Mentioned joint acct to her and sh frowned at it.......... We are later going to hv a one on one gist abt that...... Because I can't carry too much load on me oooo oooo.... It may kill me early
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by HeavenlyCherub(f): 9:03pm On Jun 24, 2020
bigpicture001:
I am exactly at this point with my soon to b married gf. Mentioned joint acct to her and sh frowned at it.......... We are later going to hv a one on one gist abt that...... Because I can't carry too much load on me oooo oooo.... It may kill me early

This thing called marriage is not easy. Money is number one cause for divorce followed by blended families. You need to have the conversation before commitment.
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by bigpicture001: 9:53pm On Jun 24, 2020
HeavenlyCherub:


This thing called marriage is not easy. Money is number one cause for divorce followed by blended families. You need to have the conversation before commitment.

Will u give up some part of ur pay for ur hubby to plan the family..? I ask u dix cuz ur in the US. I have this mentality that ladies there are too self centered
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by HeavenlyCherub(f): 10:05pm On Jun 24, 2020
bigpicture001:


Will u give up some part of ur pay for ur hubby to plan the family..? I ask u dix cuz ur in the US. I have this mentality that ladies there are too self centered

Why can’t he plan the family with his salary? I will help my husband but never 50/50. I don’t need a room mate. I will put in 40% maximum

1 Like

Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by CAPSLOCKED: 10:44pm On Jun 24, 2020
YOUR EXISTENCE ON THIS FORUM REVOLVES AROUND THE SAME THING. FOR OVER 3 YEARS, ALL YOU'VE BEEN ABOUT IS MARRIAGE, FINANCES, SALARY, MEN, INDEPENDENT, WORKING CLASS, MONEY.
IS IT THAT YOU'RE THE FIRST WOMAN IN THE HISTORY OF YOUR FAMILY TO MAKE OVER 500,000 NAIRA NET WORTH THAT YOU'VE ALLOWED THE JOY OF OWNING A FEW COINS EAT UP WHATEVER SENSE YOU HAD IN YOUR BRAIN INITIALLY?
I DON'T EVEN WANT TO IMAGINE HOW YOU LIVE OFF THIS FORUM BECAUSE IT'S EASY TO SEE THAT YOUR LIFE IS A MESS. IF YOU DON'T GET IT RIGHT TODAY, YOU MAY NEVER DO.

2 Likes

Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by Romanoff(f): 10:59pm On Jun 24, 2020
Some people have got no joy in the world. Sheesh.
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by HeavenlyCherub(f): 11:22pm On Jun 24, 2020
CAPSLOCKED:
YOUR EXISTENCE ON THIS FORUM REVOLVES AROUND THE SAME THING. FOR OVER 3 YEARS, ALL YOU'VE BEEN ABOUT IS MARRIAGE, FINANCES, SALARY, MEN, INDEPENDENT, WORKING CLASS, MONEY.
IS IT THAT YOU'RE THE FIRST WOMAN IN THE HISTORY OF YOUR FAMILY TO MAKE OVER 500,000 NAIRA NET WORTH THAT YOU'VE ALLOWED THE JOY OF OWNING A FEW COINS EAT UP WHATEVER SENSE YOU HAD IN YOUR BRAIN INITIALLY?
I DON'T EVEN WANT TO IMAGINE HOW YOU LIVE OFF THIS FORUM BECAUSE IT'S EASY TO SEE THAT YOUR LIFE IS A MESS. IF YOU DON'T GET IT RIGHT TODAY, YOU MAY NEVER DO.

You are entitled to your opinion as am I. It’s just a discussion forum it’s not that serious. You seem very bitter, I’m sorry about that. Money is not everything but it gives you options. The only thing I have in my brain firstly is God, people that love me, aspirations to succeed in all I do and these coins that prompted you to go to my profile to sum up my life. Don’t let the green monster consume you. Good day

1 Like

Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by bigpicture001: 11:39pm On Jun 24, 2020
HeavenlyCherub:


Why can’t he plan the family with his salary? I will help my husband but never 50/50. I don’t need a room mate. I will put in 40% maximum

Lol... But since he leads the house in finances, would you also allow him lead in ideology...? Or you want a win win scenerior for yourself...?
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by HeavenlyCherub(f): 11:42pm On Jun 24, 2020
bigpicture001:


Lol... But since he leads the house in finances, would you also allow him lead in ideology...? Or you want a win win scenerior for yourself...?

My husband will always be the head of the house. For him to be the head he needs to be able to lead, to provide, supportive and for him to be faithful
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by bigpicture001: 11:47pm On Jun 24, 2020
HeavenlyCherub:


My husband will always be the head of the house. For him to be the head he needs to be able to lead, to provide, supportive and for him to be faithful

That is good to know
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by Rickmann: 12:31am On Jun 25, 2020
HeavenlyCherub:
Hello,

I’m just trying to gain insight from those who are married and others alike.

OPTION 1

Exception: Both of you keep the money you had prior to the marriage.

Option 1 there’s no his money and my money, you are 1. All income earned goes into the home.

So in this case all our income will go into a joint account (account A). From that account there will be a transfer of money out into
1. My separate account
2. His separate account
3. Our joint savings account

Amounts that go into 1 and 2 will be equal.

We spend on bills etc from account A. We will discuss jointly on lavish spending from account A e.g. vacations and kids stuff.

Whatever happens in account 1 is my business, no questions asked. If I save it all and want to buy an island fine. If I want to give my friends money, fine. Its from my allowance, not from the home.


OPTION 2

You both put in a percentage of your income into the joint account and keep a %. For example that if 1 brings in $100,000 a month and you bring $50,000.. both will agree to 10% of their individual earnings for the joint account.

OPTION 3

One spouse keeps both salaries and disburses it when it is needed.

I’m just curious. What method works for you?


For me ,I think option 2 should suffice better in a family where there is absolute trust and accountability between partners.
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by HeavenlyCherub(f): 1:46am On Jun 25, 2020
Rickmann:



For me ,I think option 2 should suffice better in a family where there is absolute trust and accountability between partners.

Ok. But would you expect your partner to tell you how much they make. Or you will trust them enough
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by MFerrara(m): 2:03am On Jun 25, 2020
HeavenlyCherub:
Hello,

I’m just trying to gain insight from those who are married and others alike.

OPTION 1

Exception: Both of you keep the money you had prior to the marriage.

Option 1 there’s no his money and my money, you are 1. All income earned goes into the home.

So in this case all our income will go into a joint account (account A). From that account there will be a transfer of money out into
1. My separate account
2. His separate account
3. Our joint savings account

Amounts that go into 1 and 2 will be equal.

We spend on bills etc from account A. We will discuss jointly on lavish spending from account A e.g. vacations and kids stuff.

Whatever happens in account 1 is my business, no questions asked. If I save it all and want to buy an island fine. If I want to give my friends money, fine. Its from my allowance, not from the home.


OPTION 2

You both put in a percentage of your income into the joint account and keep a %. For example that if 1 brings in $100,000 a month and you bring $50,000.. both will agree to 10% of their individual earnings for the joint account.

OPTION 3

One spouse keeps both salaries and disburses it when it is needed.

I’m just curious. What method works for you?

Magic solution: to each his/her own - separate bank accounts and split any common expense 50-50.

Miracle, I just solved the perennial question of how to avoid fights about $$.
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by HeavenlyCherub(f): 3:44am On Jun 25, 2020
MFerrara:


Magic solution: to each his/her own - separate bank accounts and split any common expense 50-50.

Miracle, I just solved the perennial question of how to avoid fights about $$.

Ok OP question for you. Since you say it’s 50/50 if one spouse dies does the survivor keep the other spouses money? If we are 50/50 and my time with you has passed. Do you expect all access to my funds?
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by CAPSLOCKED: 7:30am On Jun 25, 2020
HeavenlyCherub:


You are entitled to your opinion as am I. It’s just a discussion forum it’s not that serious. You seem very bitter, I’m sorry about that. Money is not everything but it gives you options. The only thing I have in my brain firstly is God, people that love me, aspirations to succeed in all I do and these coins that prompted you to go to my profile to sum up my life. Don’t let the green monster consume you. Good day

SEE WHO'S TALKING ABOUT BITTER, AND GOD.
MADAM YOU BETTER DROP THIS ARMOUR OF A ONE WOMAN SOLDIER AND LIVE THE BEST OF YOUR LIFE. E-INDEPENDENT FEMINISM WAR MISTRESS WON'T PAY OFF IN THE LONG RUN.
I GUESS WE ALL LOG OUT AT THE END OF THE DAY TO FACE REAL LIFE AND ALL IT'S HARD BITTER LESSONS.

1 Like

Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by tunjilana: 7:43am On Jun 25, 2020
Create a budget for everything you need to spend in the house. Like proper budget informed by market survey...pro rate rent and sch fees

Have a joint account for these home expenses and jointly fund it preferably at ratio 70:30 or 60:40 with the man taking the lead

Have another account for joint capital projects which should be funded same ratio where u execute things like jointly buying land and stuff

Then have individual personal account for whatever u wanna do personally...e.g buying land in your own name


Where earnings drop or one person losses his/her income then let love lead and alter your ratio without noise and when they bounce back,return to the ideal scenario


The only problem is most Nigerian women come in with the mindset that it is a taboo for u to even ask them to co fund the house
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by uthlaw: 7:52am On Jun 25, 2020
Joint account for what,I make sure I take proper care of my family...I can't even allow you to know my income!

2 Likes

Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by callmeRichie(m): 8:39am On Jun 25, 2020
Well, option one (joint account) is too sensitive. It only takes two goood jolly partners, that know in/out of their partners, vibrant conversationists to work out real good oo. And seriously it's the best, as there won't be segregation and there would be full support to each other. But it only works for 2 good conversationist and best friends of partners.

Option 2 isn't bad too, buh what of if one of the partners isn't faithful to it?? Money is a spirit and a confuser sha

Option 3, there would always be a need for personal needs, and there's no way one of the partners won't be requesting for much from the money sha.

Well I'm not trying to counter your points though, I just feel this won't work in a Nigerian settings sha.

I believe in, both partners should hold their separate income, shouldn't overspend and when the needs arises disburse the money appropriately. Whoever has the money that time pays, with this none of them would overspend.

My thoughts though ... Notwithstanding, understanding your partner and conversing enough is the key
Re: How Should Finances Be Handled In A Marriage? by SavageResponse(m): 11:35am On Jun 25, 2020
I'm not doing any stupid joint account with anyone!

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