my girl recently told me she is HIV positive. i am negative and confused right now.

did u c d result urself?
and y d confusion

When did she get it, how did she get it, what is her CD4 count?  If you have been sleeping together without protection and you are negative, maybe you are resistant/immune to the virus (lucky you).

What are you going to do?  (Assuming the story is true since you only dropped a one liner about this very serious matter)

CityRose:

double 

i started dating her in september. she told me she tested positive in july 2009. i noiced that she always insisted on protective sex and acts cold after any sexual encounter. a few days into the new year she opened up to me concerning her status when i questioned her attitude towards sex. i have been to the infectitious disease hospital at yaba with her. according to her she currently has a cd4 count of 300 although i really dont know what the figure represents.

At least she has protected you and did not deliberately try to infect you, some people do that.

CD4 count of 300 is a bit on the low side, is she sickly or still healthy? I ask because some people are bedridded around that CD4 count or at least on medication.

May I ask where you guys are based? I will tell you why in a bit!!!

**PS** I am not a doctor. . . . .

we live in lagos. from time to time she complains about headaches. she also has a problem with her nose. the illness that made her go for the test damaged the nerves around the side of her face so she had a problem breathing properly. she did corrective surgery but while she can now breathe properly she now has a constant battle with runny nose.

Geez this is scary,i seriously sympathise with her

entivector:

we live in lagos. from time to time she complains about headaches. she also has a problem with her nose. the illness that made her go for the test damaged the nerves around the side of her face so she had a problem breathing properly. she did corrective surgery but while she can now breathe properly she now has a constant battle with runny nose.

I am sorry for what you guys are going through, does she at least know when she got it and who gave it to her or how she got it (it's not always transmitted sexually)

I asked where you live because people on here most times talk as though no one in Nigeria has the disease, it's as if it is a Southern African phenomenon/pandemic yet it's global, all are at risk, even married people!

thanks for the sympathy. however, while she goes thru physical pain i still think it's nothing compared to what's going on in her mind. i try to make her feel strong but she's sure i will one day run away like her last lover did when she told him about her status. they were having unprotected sex before she fell ill.i don't think she thinks much about tomorrow.

i once went for a training program where a lady with HIV was invited to speak about stigmatization. this lady in question is married and has a child. she was positive b4 getting married and both father and child are negative. you need to speak to a health professional about this issue for the best advise.

entivector:

thanks for the sympathy. however, while she goes thru physical pain i still think it's nothing compared to what's going on in her mind. i try to make her feel strong but she's sure i will one day run away like her last lover did when she told him about her status. they were having unprotected sex before she fell ill.i don't think she thinks much about tomorrow.

Unfortunately for some people, HIV/AIDS is a death sentence and stigmatisation does not help in any way. Down here the stigmatisation is not so bad since a lot of people have the disease and medication is readily available and people know they can have meaningful lives if they take care of themselves and the mindset is right. Your girlfriend needs to read on this disease and understand as much as she can and hopefully once she has gained some knowledge, she will know how best to deal with her situation and manage it but is starts with the mind.

Good luck to you guys, it takes a strong partner to stick around and be supportive, she is lucky to have you!

there are so many people today living with HIV and they live normal and happy lives even to a ripe old age. the world has not come to an end just because someone has HIV. thats an old fashioned concept.

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

My boyfriend told me on Monday that he's also infected. he just realized too. did mine and came out negative. i might have to wait for 6months to re-do, though. . leaving him is definitely not an option buh I am truly scared.

apart from that, I'm still finding it hard to believe. he seems very cool and happy. i only pray he's joking, afterall he didn't show me the result (he said he tore it instantly)

^^

Better go for a test fast.

nino b:

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It is HARDER for women to transmit HIV/AIDS virus to men and the chance of a man infecting a woman is higher than a woman infecting the man.

Count your lucky stars and wrap up.

1 THING MUST SURELY KILL A MAN. Go ahead & date de girl if u luv her.

My friend i no fit shout.U are a very strong man to stay with her and dat is d best coz leaving her wil coz more harm to her and itz as if u are killing a soul.My only advise i gat 4 u if u stil wanna continue da relationship is dat "ALWAYZ REMEMBER TO PROTECT UR SELF".Kudos bro u try wallahi and for da other lady who says her bf is infected,may be is kinda testing u to knw if u wil jst quit immediately so watch out and be careful.Jst my 2 quarterz.

Wow, this is one of the truly serious threads I have seen on here and I am not equipped to give you any advice. If you still wants to continue this relationship, get your self educated, know more abt the illness. Good luck

speechless

hmmmmmm, are u sure about this and r u some kind of an alien that is resistant to virus,

Speechless

190:

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For the guy's lay off the doobie

Thats not the end of the world poster. Be strong and in all honesty, I wont be sleeping with her if I were you but you can help her attain sexual satisfaction by 'youknowwhat' nah.

Odunnu:

Thats not the end of the world poster. Be strong and in all honesty, I wont be sleeping with her if I were you but you can help her attain sexual satisfaction by 'youknowwhat' nah. 

How ma? I'm an ardent listener-c[i]u[/i]m-fast learner.

You are lucky that she came clean about it and insisted on protection. Are you going to go on with your relationship with her?

Avi8r:

You are lucky that she came clean about it and insisted on protection. Are you going to go on with your relationship with her?

Did you smoke? Are you well? What kinda silly question is that?

I take it you are one of the stigma ridden. There are cases of discordant couples who have successful working relationships.

Did you smoke? Are you well? What kinda silly question is that?