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My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. - Family (5) - Nairaland

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Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by LexngtonSteele: 12:38pm On Jun 06, 2020
StubbornGENIUS:
First off,OP indicate where you copied this story from cos you just changed your gender from M to F.

Oops ! grin

Busted!
Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by Acidosis(m): 12:40pm On Jun 06, 2020
You didn't give enough details na. You only posted what his reactions have been since you got married. How did you handle finances before marriage? Did he give his all and disclose his finance? Did your family billed him N2million as dowry on top marriage? Did your family demand 5 cows, 100 yards of lace, 32 goats?? I hope this isn't a case of "revenge" or punishment for what your family did to him?

For a man to come out immediately after his wedding to say he owns you and your finance is highly suspicious. No normal human being would do that. It takes a crook or someone on a revenge mission to say a thing that like. That being said, your experiences are a reflection of a poor foundation, poor courtship/dating, and so on.

3 Likes

Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by MissEfe(f): 12:40pm On Jun 06, 2020
Your marriage Lack's love and Trust.
Because If the both of u really love each other, you will both be open minded with each other, Being open minded lead's to new plans and ideas.. Thus bonding together to accomplish this idea's and new plan.
Then there wont be any finance secrecy Leading to hubby seizing ur ATM forcefully...

1 Like

Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by Pzpropertylimit(m): 12:40pm On Jun 06, 2020
It's irresponsibility of a man to eye his wife's money . I don't know the details of the finances of my wife whom I invested in let alone a woman u didn't give work or pay her school fees . It makes man lazy and shift his focus . If she is assisting me in one way or the other at home , I should be glad . Why collecting her ATM ?
Madam , na psquare song omowahalade I should be playing for u now . Think twice and balance the equation before u get second child

1 Like

Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by OmoDavido(m): 12:41pm On Jun 06, 2020
How can a wife be hiding things as little as her salary from her husband whom she claimed to love?


There is not suppose to be anything like secret between partners in marriage, this is not boyfriend and girlfriend relationship. Haba!

2 Likes

Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by Talkingoil(m): 12:41pm On Jun 06, 2020
Judybash93:


Inasmuch as i agree with you, i don't think the husband should force his wife to reveal the details of her account to him if she doesn't want to

It's not by force alright, but she is his wife, she probably knows how much he earns, so why should she have difficulty in revealing her salary to her husband, it shows secrecy and lack of submission and I tell you, if she is not wise in handling this, it could cause problems in her home
Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by SavageMaster: 12:42pm On Jun 06, 2020
UzorChinonso:
Good day Nairalanders, I have been married for just a year now and it has not been easy here! My Husband wants to know every thing about my finance. He has disturbed me to know how much is my salary worth of.

I have always denied him of the fact, what I know is that I used my money to refurbish our flat, got some new things to change the outlook of the place....

But I am not really finding it funny any longer. As we speak, he collected my ATM card since last two weeks, said I must tell him the pin or I should forget having it back. I went to my bank, told them that I lost the card and they changed it for me last Friday and he collected it again said it's either I tell him the pin or he will do something funny ...

I don't know what funny thing he's gonna do but I am worried! Pls is this how marriage is?
He claims to own me and own my salary! Is it fair? This marriage is too early instead I would have quit and I am pregnant at the moment!
What do I do? I don't want anybody to know anything about my finances including him till I have my baby whom my spirit accepted that I should make my next of kin.

What do I do ?


From this post, I can deduce something. Your marriage is headed for the rocks;
or you'll soon become a punching bag, and maybe end up in a body bag

Your husband feels he "owns" you and your salary. Your husband is demanding info about your finances and your ATM PIN. You're refusing to divulge such information. Soon, out of frustration, he'll start raising his hands against you, and you know where such violence will lead to if it persists.

On your part, you don't want anybody to know about your finances, including your husband. At the moment, you're pregnant.

I don't know the foundation on which your marriage was built in the first place. But then, I don't see both of you lasting long in it if things continue this way.


There's a big trust issue here, in addition to many more. There's also communication issues between both of you.

I'll advise you meet a seasoned marriage counselor. Also seek God's face too, to transform both you and your husband.

All the best

1 Like

Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by frozen70(f): 12:42pm On Jun 06, 2020
UzorChinonso:
Good day Nairalanders, I have been married for just a year now and it has not been easy here! My Husband wants to know every thing about my finance. He has disturbed me to know how much is my salary worth of.

I have always denied him of the fact, what I know is that I used my money to refurbish our flat, got some new things to change the outlook of the place....

But I am not really finding it funny any longer. As we speak, he collected my ATM card since last two weeks, said I must tell him the pin or I should forget having it back. I went to my bank, told them that I lost the card and they changed it for me last Friday and he collected it again said it's either I tell him the pin or he will do something funny ...

I don't know what funny thing he's gonna do but I am worried! Pls is this how marriage is?
He claims to own me and own my salary! Is it fair? This marriage is too early instead I would have quit and I am pregnant at the moment!
What do I do? I don't want anybody to know anything about my finances including him till I have my baby whom my spirit accepted that I should make my next of kin.

What do I do ?

That's how they behave once they can't handle a home front financially and gets intimidated because you are doing it

I will advise you open another account, don't request for alert

Transfer the money in the present account and let him have the pin number and tell him what you earn

If you like lie to reduce the amount and let him know that you took a loan from your work place to do the furnishings because others are taking loan and you will be paying from your salary

Start a secret savings in the new account you open, get the atm and hide it

I can't believe you can't hide your card in that house, how come he sees your atm card easily

For now that argue with him,
Don't let him know what you are spending on
Don't spend or count money in his presence anyhow

Delete all alert on the present account phone

Notify your family because he just started and will do worst

You don't need to wait until you put to bed before using your child as next of kin

Use any of your family members or parents as your next of kin and also your records in your place of work because he is acting like someone on a mission

God forbid

3 Likes

Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by Inspectorsuga22(m): 12:43pm On Jun 06, 2020
UzorChinonso:
Good day Nairalanders, I have been married for just a year now and it has not been easy here! My Husband wants to know every thing about my finance. He has disturbed me to know how much is my salary worth of.

I have always denied him of the fact, what I know is that I used my money to refurbish our flat, got some new things to change the outlook of the place....

But I am not really finding it funny any longer. As we speak, he collected my ATM card since last two weeks, said I must tell him the pin or I should forget having it back. I went to my bank, told them that I lost the card and they changed it for me last Friday and he collected it again said it's either I tell him the pin or he will do something funny ...

I don't know what funny thing he's gonna do but I am worried! Pls is this how marriage is?
He claims to own me and own my salary! Is it fair? This marriage is too early instead I would have quit and I am pregnant at the moment!
What do I do? I don't want anybody to know anything about my finances including him till I have my baby whom my spirit accepted that I should make my next of kin.

What do I do ?

U are waiting to make ur unborn baby ur next of kin? Ur marriage is barely a year n u have already started hiding things from a man u claim to love n have joined to become one? May God save men from Jezebels like u who only reason to get married is to impress people with the tag of MRS. From ur write up, u clearly don't love that man n clearly also doesn't know the meaning of marriage. U think coming here to tell us how u rearranged ur sitting room or watever is going to buy u cheap sympathy? Well maybe from people of ur kind. My wife works n I work, she informs me the moment she receives her salary n I do same, next is we make financial decisions together as couple that working towards a brighter future. U can't share ur financial details n dat shows how much of a supportive wife u have bn to the unfortunate man. How can the two of u make ur lives better wen u can't even put ur heads together n plan on project that will benefit u n ur unborn children wen u feel ur own money should be spent the way u want it...
U are not a real woman

5 Likes

Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by OmoDavido(m): 12:44pm On Jun 06, 2020
MissEfe:
Your marriage Lack's love and Trust.
Because If the both of u really love each other, you will both be open minded with each other, Being open minded lead's to new plans and ideas.. Thus bonding together to accomplish this idea's and new plan.
Then there wont be any finance secrecy Leading to hubby seizing ur ATM forcefully...
You have said it all ma’am!

3 Likes

Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by gistsmill04: 12:44pm On Jun 06, 2020
Unprofessional Motivational Speaker everywhere after breakup

SOURCE: https://theupdates.net/unprofessional-motivational-speaker-silence-sound-of-ex/

Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by Goldie16(f): 12:44pm On Jun 06, 2020
Have another secret account and leave only like 20k in the account that he is killing himself over.
Lazy man

1 Like

Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by twinskenny(m): 12:44pm On Jun 06, 2020
PHIPEX:
How do you daily share a bed and your body with someone you can't trust with your finances? Is your money worth more than your body? Both of you are heading for a very bumpy ride if you keep hiding your finances from each other. How exactly will both of you plan as a family if you dont know how much both of you have?

Seizing your ATM is a first stage of crises escalation, if you dont resolves these 'secrets' you might not have a marriage in the near future. Both of you might just be co-habiting and bearing children.

i tell you bro.. as a man, my wife know all my finances. as a matter we share the same email for alert..

1 Like

Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by staymore: 12:45pm On Jun 06, 2020
Kekereekun123:
Men are no longer fools. Times are hard you cannot hide salary and finance details from your husband. Thunder fire ladies who say my money is my money and his money is ours

You are on point. If you find out you will see that the man is very transparent with his own financial dealings and is not hiding anything from her. If she doesn't have any ulterior motive she should open up for her husband.

Women are funny oh

1 Like

Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by Omonigeriarere: 12:45pm On Jun 06, 2020
SweetCunt97:
When one marries a Gold digger... He came for the money.

Did op tell you that the man is bidding his salary from her? From her write up, it is obvious that she knows her husband salary, while her husband knows nothing about her salary.

Now tell me, who is a playing a gold digging role in this scenario? If you can't trust a man with your finance, why did you marry him?

You statement is just a replica of fallacy of illogical conclusion.

3 Likes

Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by Blackmann001: 12:46pm On Jun 06, 2020
chiddyok:

So in a hurry to quote and educate a woman you didn’t even read my original post well. Go back and read it properly. Shame on you.

What is so special in your original post..?

Your i tensions is what is judge
Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by timmybabyface: 12:46pm On Jun 06, 2020
Kekereekun123:
Men are no longer fools. Times are hard you cannot hide salary and finance details from your husband. Thunder fire ladies who say my money is my money and his money is ours



Lol you dey vex oo
Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by Eketem: 12:47pm On Jun 06, 2020
You didnt discuss finances before marriage?

Anyway when we say end bride price list and all you people will scream sadly paying for your head means traditionally he can claim to own you but legally he can't.


He cannot force you to disclose these details and he is going about this the wrong way.
Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by Alaganature(m): 12:47pm On Jun 06, 2020
UzorChinonso:
Good day Nairalanders, I have been married for just a year now and it has not been easy here! My Husband wants to know every thing about my finance. He has disturbed me to know how much is my salary worth of.

I have always denied him of the fact, what I know is that I used my money to refurbish our flat, got some new things to change the outlook of the place....

But I am not really finding it funny any longer. As we speak, he collected my ATM card since last two weeks, said I must tell him the pin or I should forget having it back. I went to my bank, told them that I lost the card and they changed it for me last Friday and he collected it again said it's either I tell him the pin or he will do something funny ...

I don't know what funny thing he's gonna do but I am worried! Pls is this how marriage is?
He claims to own me and own my salary! Is it fair? This marriage is too early instead I would have quit and I am pregnant at the moment!
What do I do? I don't want anybody to know anything about my finances including him till I have my baby whom my spirit accepted that I should make my next of kin.

What do I do ?

I'm not in anyway supporting the both party..cos I believe love is for better for worse..I believe you guys as trust issue.. what's the big deal if you tell him..as long you know how much he earns as salary..

please I'll advise you to tell him before he does something stupid..
Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by Nobody: 12:48pm On Jun 06, 2020
I'm guessing you copied this from a page on Facebook, or you simply wasn't satisfied with all the comments given to you on that page?

Whichever one it is, I'd say knock yourself out

Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by Talkingoil(m): 12:48pm On Jun 06, 2020
UzorChinonso:
Good day Nairalanders, I have been married for just a year now and it has not been easy here! My Husband wants to know every thing about my finance. He has disturbed me to know how much is my salary worth of.

I have always denied him of the fact, what I know is that I used my money to refurbish our flat, got some new things to change the outlook of the place....

But I am not really finding it funny any longer. As we speak, he collected my ATM card since last two weeks, said I must tell him the pin or I should forget having it back. I went to my bank, told them that I lost the card and they changed it for me last Friday and he collected it again said it's either I tell him the pin or he will do something funny ...

I don't know what funny thing he's gonna do but I am worried! Pls is this how marriage is?
He claims to own me and own my salary! Is it fair? This marriage is too early instead I would have quit and I am pregnant at the moment!
What do I do? I don't want anybody to know anything about my finances including him till I have my baby whom my spirit accepted that I should make my next of kin.

What do I do ?

Madam, your husband married you, he brought out his hard earned money to marry you and I'm sure you know how much he earns, why are you finding it difficult to open up your finances to your husband? In all sincerity this is wrong and this could lead to your home crashing if not handled properly, when you withhold such information from him he might not fight you depending on the kind of man he is but he'll start nursing things in his heart towards you. woman be wise and guard your marriage.
Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by vivalavida(m): 12:49pm On Jun 06, 2020
futuremoma34:



Based on experience... Open another account, transfer all your savings into the new account.. Then always keep not less than 10k in the orda account he has your ATM...

Based on experience baa?

What is wrong with your husband knowing your income?
If you always keep nothing less than 10k in that account and don't support at home, a smart man will know he is being played.
But marriage is supposed to be an open affair where u all pool finances together and make plans together. So why the secrecy?
Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by raphloren: 12:49pm On Jun 06, 2020
I doubt if this person is matured to even marry. Just one year u can't trust each other with finances. How can u not let Ur hubby know Ur salary? Are u planning to live without him already? U are talking about making Ur baby next of kin mean while he makes u next of kin as his wife.

I don't think u shud av married in d first place cos u still want to control Ur independent life style. Ur husband had the right to know Ur income. Both of u can plan with his n Ur income except theirs no unity within u two. He's not wrong. I think it stance of this made him tell u he owns u which is also true.
U guys shud learn to do things In Agreement. Thats how real couples do.[color=#990000][/color]

1 Like

Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by Oyiboman69: 12:50pm On Jun 06, 2020
aeion:
He doesn't have the right to take your ATM card away from you nor demand your PIN. If he needs money, I'm sure he knows how to ask but forcefully having direct access to your money at his choosing should be a no-no. If he's threatening you over this, tell your family and get yourself and the baby in your belly to a safe place, but do not give him that PIN. A man who behaves like this is up to no good and can't be trusted.



These are the words of a controlling, abusive man. He does not own you, neither does he own your salary.

Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by vivalavida(m): 12:50pm On Jun 06, 2020
PremierGuy:
Nothing wrong in your husband knowing about how much you earn. Let him know how much percentage of your salary you can contribute towards the household finance.

That's how it should be
Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by Beatswim: 12:50pm On Jun 06, 2020
UzorChinonso:
Good day Nairalanders, I have been married for just a year now and it has not been easy here! My Husband wants to know every thing about my finance. He has disturbed me to know how much is my salary worth of.

I have always denied him of the fact, what I know is that I used my money to refurbish our flat, got some new things to change the outlook of the place....

But I am not really finding it funny any longer. As we speak, he collected my ATM card since last two weeks, said I must tell him the pin or I should forget having it back. I went to my bank, told them that I lost the card and they changed it for me last Friday and he collected it again said it's either I tell him the pin or he will do something funny ...

I don't know what funny thing he's gonna do but I am worried! Pls is this how marriage is?
He claims to own me and own my salary! Is it fair? This marriage is too early instead I would have quit and I am pregnant at the moment!
What do I do? I don't want anybody to know anything about my finances including him till I have my baby whom my spirit accepted that I should make my next of kin.

What do I do ?
if i tell u the truth, u will feel very bad.. But if truly u want peace.. Longlife and a growing marriage, u have to be open and be honest to your husband..u and your husband are not equal.. Infact hes your lord.. He posses u in entirety but that is if hes faithful and honest too..

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by duality(m): 12:51pm On Jun 06, 2020
UzorChinonso:
Good day Nairalanders, I have been married for just a year now and it has not been easy here! My Husband wants to know every thing about my finance. He has disturbed me to know how much is my salary worth of.

I have always denied him of the fact, what I know is that I used my money to refurbish our flat, got some new things to change the outlook of the place....

But I am not really finding it funny any longer. As we speak, he collected my ATM card since last two weeks, said I must tell him the pin or I should forget having it back. I went to my bank, told them that I lost the card and they changed it for me last Friday and he collected it again said it's either I tell him the pin or he will do something funny ...

I don't know what funny thing he's gonna do but I am worried! Pls is this how marriage is?
He claims to own me and own my salary! Is it fair? This marriage is too early instead I would have quit and I am pregnant at the moment!
What do I do? I don't want anybody to know anything about my finances including him till I have my baby whom my spirit accepted that I should make my next of kin.

What do I do ?

Your story is fake. however, you can DM me, I will arrange my boys to beat him up and return your card. I'll do that for a token.
Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by Beatswim: 12:51pm On Jun 06, 2020
Inspectorsuga22:

U are waiting to make ur unborn baby ur next of kin? Ur marriage is barely a year n u have already started hiding things from a man u claim to love n have joined to become one? May God save men from Jezebels like u who only reason to get married is to impress people with the tag of MRS. From ur write up, u clearly don't love that man n clearly also doesn't know the meaning of marriage. U think coming here to tell us how u rearranged ur sitting room or watever is going to buy u cheap sympathy? Well maybe from people of ur kind. My wife works n I work, she informs me the moment she receives her salary n I do same, next is we make financial decisions together as couple that working towards a brighter future. U can't share ur financial details n dat shows how much of a supportive wife u have bn to the unfortunate man. How can the two of u make ur lives better wen u can't even put ur heads together n plan on project that will benefit u n ur unborn children wen u feel ur own money should be spent the way u want it...
U are not a real woman
God bless your marriage sir.. More wisdom

1 Like

Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by geegee08(m): 12:52pm On Jun 06, 2020
I sense serious trust issues here. Is it possible he suspects you are spending beyond your "legitimate" source of income? Or that you are receiving funds from wrong people? What type of lives did you both live before marriage? Being open with both your finances will help keep both of you in the straight and improve trust.

If however after his knowing your worth, you see him trying to waste your savings, then I will suggest you reassess your relationship and whether it is worth remaining in the marriage.
Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by Happyguy201: 12:52pm On Jun 06, 2020
This kind husband no get shame . Tifiakwa

1 Like

Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by ResourceMan(m): 12:52pm On Jun 06, 2020
UzorChinonso:
Good day Nairalanders, I have been married for just a year now and it has not been easy here! My Husband wants to know every thing about my finance. He has disturbed me to know how much is my salary worth of.

I have always denied him of the fact, what I know is that I used my money to refurbish our flat, got some new things to change the outlook of the place....

But I am not really finding it funny any longer. As we speak, he collected my ATM card since last two weeks, said I must tell him the pin or I should forget having it back. I went to my bank, told them that I lost the card and they changed it for me last Friday and he collected it again said it's either I tell him the pin or he will do something funny ...

I don't know what funny thing he's gonna do but I am worried! Pls is this how marriage is?
He claims to own me and own my salary! Is it fair? This marriage is too early instead I would have quit and I am pregnant at the moment!
What do I do? I don't want anybody to know anything about my finances including him till I have my baby whom my spirit accepted that I should make my next of kin.

What do I do ?

Your Husband Made You His Next Of Kin, But Your Spirit Has Already Told You Not To Make Him Your Next Of Kin.
@OP I Know Your Type Already. If You Guys Mistakenly Relocates Abroad You Will Surely Deal With Your Husband Till He Is Completely Frustrated.

I Just Pity Most Nigerian Married Men.
Re: My Husband Wants To Know Everything About My Finances. by Inspectorsuga22(m): 12:53pm On Jun 06, 2020
MissEfe:
Your marriage Lack's love and Trust.
Because If the both of u really love each other, you will both be open minded with each other, Being open minded lead's to new plans and ideas.. Thus bonding together to accomplish this idea's and new plan.
Then there wont be any finance secrecy Leading to hubby seizing ur ATM forcefully...
My dear u have said it all, my wife have first-hand access to my earnings n properties n vice versa. How then do they plan to make their lives better wen they don't even know each others financial capabilities? So people think marriage is all Abt having children or answering wife/husband.
Wen u look at this lady's write-up, u will see a very wrong marital foundation that should be urgently corrected if ever they wish to succeed in that marriage that is barely one year... Hmm

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