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Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. - Family (10) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. (59692 Views)

My Genotype Is AS And My Fiancee Is AS; What Do I Do? / Parents Arrange Wife For Their 21-Year-Old Son Who Has SS Genotype / My Wife Lied About Her Genotype (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by Boredasf: 4:49pm On Jun 09, 2020
I'd advice you to run a DNA test on that baby after she delivers.
I don't trust that your wife.
She probably manipulated you to marry her quick cause she wanted to put another man's baby on your neck.
My uncle recently discovered his 6 month old baby isn't his after I encouraged him to run a DNA test.
Women can be very manipulative, please be smart
ZeroShenanigan:
I'm above mid thirties, finished NYSC 2015 and i just secured a government teaching job after spending more than 3 years teaching in private schools. I met my wife earlier 2019, she was in her final year in school, we dated throughout the year and planned to get married after she graduated. She graduated and we make a move for our introduction, then we suggested to have the marriage before she go for her Nysc so as to enable her serve in our home state as I already have a rented apartment to start a small family.

As we were planning for the marriage, we were also planning her NYSC. She was required to have a medical certificate for the NYSC which of course required blood test including genotype. She came back with the result of her genotype as AS. That was the only time I remember to take genotype issue serious. Even if I have some little knowledge about it before, I decided to research more about it on the internet and also met some of my friends who are medically inclined. I came to realize my own genotype test is also important at that moment. I might have done the test in school but I didn't pay attention to it usefulness so I don't remember the result.

I don't usually fall sick except for normal malaria when there is mosquito bite, never had a drip line in my body for once, never slept in a hospital bed, I don't have any reason to take note of my genotype or blood test.

Her results then prompt me to have my own test done too which came out to be AS also. By these periods we have convinced our families to choose a date for the marriage so that we can have the wedding before her NYSC. Marriage is to hold in a week time when I got my own genotype result.
From my further findings about AS and AS couple, I discovered how risky it is for their offsprings. I tried to explain to her but she turned a deaf ear, she alleged me of trying to break her heart at that critical period. She reported to her sisters they tried to blame me but I make them all realized it's not my fault because throughout my visitation and introduction to their family nobody has ever ask us about genotype. I am an orphan, I don't have any closer family to guide me except for my sisters who can't wait for me to get married because of my age, they also had never thought of it as well.

My wife sisters gave us some examples of older couples who were both AS with only one or no sickler among their children. My wife also made a threat of killing herself or she kill me if the marriage didn't hold. She even suggested we proceed with the marriage and break up after few weeks of marriage because of the shame that may follow if we stop the marriage or maybe she was desperate because of the marriage certificate, I don't know. I maintained my stand of backing off the marriage but she reported to my sisters also. Her sisters and my sisters later tried to encourage us to go ahead with prayers since we have chosen the date. We were advised not to disclose our genotype result to anyone again because people will discourage us.

Even though I was skeptical about the marriage, it later commenced with less spending because the Nikkah was held in a mosque and a tent for refreshments.
After the marriage we tried to talk about it, and she told me, she was afraid, may be she was pregnant before the marriage that's why she insisted on going ahead with the marriage. She also revealed to me that she was not happy with the decision as well, means she also know the implications but she have to avoid the shame of stopping the marriage after inviting guests to the occasion.

During these period genotype before the marriage, my love for her reduced drastically because of her desperation and her refusal to understand the risk we are about to take. I tried to avoid pregnancy from our first month of marriage but I later gave up and she conceived immediately. Now she is closer to her delivery. We hardly talk or play together inside. We only discuss about feeding, maternity and things to get for the coming baby.
I discovered we quarrel over little things that can be over looked by lovers. I'm not happy in the marriage, I spend most of time watching TV or stay outside all day because of unresolved issues.

I'm planning to arrange for a divorce after she delivered the baby because this is my first baby and I would love to have 2 or 3 kids more. I can't take the risk of allowing any of my children to be a sickler.
Advise is needed if my plan for divorce is a good one and do I stand a chance of loosing anything?

2 Likes

Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by Nitah1: 4:51pm On Jun 09, 2020
janvier27:
I thought there is now a test that can be done at a stage in pregnancy to determine the genotype of the foetus, and know what options are there before birth if it turns out to be SS.
The cost of the test is 200k my brother.
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by 4xplore: 4:51pm On Jun 09, 2020
.
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by 4xplore: 4:52pm On Jun 09, 2020
ZeroShenanigan:
I'm above mid thirties, finished NYSC 2015 and i just secured a government teaching job after spending more than 3 years teaching in private schools. I met my wife earlier 2019, she was in her final year in school, we dated throughout the year and planned to get married after she graduated. She graduated and we make a move for our introduction, then we suggested to have the marriage before she go for her Nysc so as to enable her serve in our home state as I already have a rented apartment to start a small family.

As we were planning for the marriage, we were also planning her NYSC. She was required to have a medical certificate for the NYSC which of course required blood test including genotype. She came back with the result of her genotype as AS. That was the only time I remember to take genotype issue serious. Even if I have some little knowledge about it before, I decided to research more about it on the internet and also met some of my friends who are medically inclined. I came to realize my own genotype test is also important at that moment. I might have done the test in school but I didn't pay attention to it usefulness so I don't remember the result.

I don't usually fall sick except for normal malaria when there is mosquito bite, never had a drip line in my body for once, never slept in a hospital bed, I don't have any reason to take note of my genotype or blood test.

Her results then prompt me to have my own test done too which came out to be AS also. By these periods we have convinced our families to choose a date for the marriage so that we can have the wedding before her NYSC. Marriage is to hold in a week time when I got my own genotype result.
From my further findings about AS and AS couple, I discovered how risky it is for their offsprings. I tried to explain to her but she turned a deaf ear, she alleged me of trying to break her heart at that critical period. She reported to her sisters they tried to blame me but I make them all realized it's not my fault because throughout my visitation and introduction to their family nobody has ever ask us about genotype. I am an orphan, I don't have any closer family to guide me except for my sisters who can't wait for me to get married because of my age, they also had never thought of it as well.

My wife sisters gave us some examples of older couples who were both AS with only one or no sickler among their children. My wife also made a threat of killing herself or she kill me if the marriage didn't hold. She even suggested we proceed with the marriage and break up after few weeks of marriage because of the shame that may follow if we stop the marriage or maybe she was desperate because of the marriage certificate, I don't know. I maintained my stand of backing off the marriage but she reported to my sisters also. Her sisters and my sisters later tried to encourage us to go ahead with prayers since we have chosen the date. We were advised not to disclose our genotype result to anyone again because people will discourage us.

Even though I was skeptical about the marriage, it later commenced with less spending because the Nikkah was held in a mosque and a tent for refreshments.
After the marriage we tried to talk about it, and she told me, she was afraid, may be she was pregnant before the marriage that's why she insisted on going ahead with the marriage. She also revealed to me that she was not happy with the decision as well, means she also know the implications but she have to avoid the shame of stopping the marriage after inviting guests to the occasion.

During these period genotype before the marriage, my love for her reduced drastically because of her desperation and her refusal to understand the risk we are about to take. I tried to avoid pregnancy from our first month of marriage but I later gave up and she conceived immediately. Now she is closer to her delivery. We hardly talk or play together inside. We only discuss about feeding, maternity and things to get for the coming baby.
I discovered we quarrel over little things that can be over looked by lovers. I'm not happy in the marriage, I spend most of time watching TV or stay outside all day because of unresolved issues.

I'm planning to arrange for a divorce after she delivered the baby because this is my first baby and I would love to have 2 or 3 kids more. I can't take the risk of allowing any of my children to be a sickler.
Advise is needed if my plan for divorce is a good one and do I stand a chance of loosing anything?

Advances in Science has long solved this As As problem. Save up $7000 and travel to India with your wife. Perform a medical procedure call PGD and case is solved. None of your kids will be SS..
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by lamidi21(m): 4:53pm On Jun 09, 2020
What you need now is thinking on how to support your wife and your child to have a good life in this our challenging country ,not thinking of divorce , unless you are telling us you don't love her before now.
From your narration it seems you are Muslim , if you are desperate in getting divorce its better you discuss with her and both of agreed.
Then get marry to your wish.
May God be with us all.
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by PeacenLove2: 4:58pm On Jun 09, 2020
andyanders:
Op, listen. A good friend of mine had just same issue like urs, both AS, and he is the only son. Both young graduates. They never knew until both of them had to go for test after the wife took in. When he told me, I counseld him to show his wife more love and allow God take control. The baby boy came and came with AA. The second child came, a daughter- AA. The last child came aa.

Just shower your wife with luv and don't heep any fault on her alone 'cus you're part of the blame. The mistake has been made.

More luv and don't seek for any divorce.

Wa gbagyi! I love the hope that comes with this story.

OP, the deed has been done and I cannot imagine how you and your wife are feeling. If you're like this, who knows how troubled your wife would be?

Since you weren't proactive in the first place, divorce is another bad decision you're about to make. Abhoring any ill feeling towards your wife for the decisions you're both responsible for are negative vibes. Nothing good comes out of negative vibes my brother.

You need to talk to your wife, the two of you talk and cry together, seek forgiveness from each other and from God and pray that God takes over the entire situation. Love unconditionally as you have become one. Show love and respect to God through each other. Then hope for the best outcome. Be optimistic and God forbid if it turns the other way, God knows best. Just love and care for your family. I pray you get the best outcome.

You can then start planning for the aftermath. You may not have money for selective births and all. You can consider adoption in the future to grow your family. Look, man proposes, God disposes. Get better perspective on your situation. There are many ways to be happy waiting for us to explore. May God help you.
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by mrkia(m): 5:04pm On Jun 09, 2020
Ejenavi18:
Cancelling the marriage when you discovered your genotype incompatibility could have save you a your spouse from the heartache you're going through now
But all the same, the deed has been done already, you have to face it together.
You have a 25% chance of having a baby with SS genotype, let's just pray it turns out your first baby isn't SS.
Just try and support your wife now that she's pregnant.
As for this, there are tests that can be carried out to determine the genotype of the foetus in utero..
Amniocentesis and Chorionic Villus sampling.
Sir, please, can you tell how viable the test is because we are suspecting this case of SS with my nephew presently whereas the Gyntyp test carried out for this 4years old kid w
Yoighaman:
@OP; If that child turns out to be SS, he or she would never forgive you or your wife. How can you both be so cruel.
Sir, can you please tell us how dependable this test will be? becos we're suspecting this case of SS with my 4years old nephew who always exhibits the symptoms by complaining of pains in all his joints almost every month whereas the Gyntyp test carried out on him turned out to be AA. Mind you, his parents are very closed to perfect their divorce process now that they are aware they are both AS AS.

For the sake of clarity, let me replace my question. The boy's Gyntyp was done at a time he was over 3years and the test still seems suspicious like this. Don't you think the one that will be done for a foetus will not be reliable ? I need your answer s.

Of course, we're aiming@ repeating the test.
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by Nobody: 5:05pm On Jun 09, 2020
newdawn2017:
op re u marrying because of love or just to ve children? undecided can't u just be married with no children & be happy in love with ur partner. Na was for African men o
marry without children, haba. What's this abeg, what's the need for marriage??
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by fallingsky(m): 5:12pm On Jun 09, 2020
Just imagine how u are blaming your wife as if you yourself is not AS. I fear you ohh.

1 Like

Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by Sweeetheart(m): 5:24pm On Jun 09, 2020
I don't know how true is this but I learnt from a medical lab scientist graduate who got married to AS like her and they both agreed to test the genotype of the child during pregnancy and if it appears AS, they will terminate the pregnancy


medical lab scientist, Biologist and doctors in the house, how true is this


@ the topic, Op be a responsible man. if you've a sincere feelings for that lady, the decision of letting her go won't be that easy. you might be lucky to have your three kids that will have AS all through


just be positive and follow medical advise on time
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by Sweeetheart(m): 5:28pm On Jun 09, 2020
Nitah1:
The cost of the test is 200k my brother.


I think that's on the safer side because birthing SS can be so challenging, if na only money it would have been OK



na real depression
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by ghettochild(m): 5:28pm On Jun 09, 2020
janvier27:
I thought there is now a test that can be done at a stage in pregnancy to determine the genotype of the foetus, and know what options are there before birth if it turns out to be SS.
Not here in Nigeria but abroad n even if it will b here in Nigeria, it will b expensive
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by Sweeetheart(m): 5:29pm On Jun 09, 2020
Boredasf:
I'd advice you to run a DNA test on that baby after she delivers.
I don't trust that your wife.
She probably manipulated you to marry her quick cause she wanted to put another man's baby on your neck.
My uncle recently discovered his 6 month old baby isn't his after I encouraged him to run a DNA test.
Women can be very manipulative, please be smart



How much does DNA test cost in Nigeria?
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by Nitah1: 5:30pm On Jun 09, 2020
Sweeetheart:



I think that's on the safer side because birthing SS can be so challenging, if na only money it would have been OK



na real depression
My dear,i am in position to tell you that....it's not easy.
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by Xanderlex: 5:31pm On Jun 09, 2020
Very terrible decision you made poster. Those people advising you then wouldn't be around to assist you both when you start battling a child in SS crisis. On the other hand you are a Muslim, it is possible to get another wife if you need more kids.

1 Like

Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by Nitah1: 5:32pm On Jun 09, 2020
ghettochild:

Not here in Nigeria but abroad n even if it will b here in Nigeria, it will b expensive
There is here in Nigeria.
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by Boredasf: 5:34pm On Jun 09, 2020
between 50k to 80k
Some hospitals are cheaper though.
Do some research and compare prices.
Sweeetheart:




How much does DNA test cost in Nigeria?
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by mamatwiny(f): 5:39pm On Jun 09, 2020
4xplore:


Advances in Science has long solved this As As problem. Save up $7000 and travel to India with your wife. Perform a medical procedure call PGD and case is solved. None of your kids will be SS..

This op na teacher and not a bank manager.

There are some stories I don't expect to hear from graduates. If they have seen a family that has just one sickler and the condition during the child's crisis especially before 20 years, they won't even think twice about not to marry.

Since their love was supposed to be strong enough to stop them from marrying, let it bring the 3m for this treatment or money for ivf with donor sperm, or even adoption.
I tire for some so called graduates.
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by petitejolie(f): 5:44pm On Jun 09, 2020
ZeroShenanigan:
I'm above mid thirties, finished NYSC 2015 and i just secured a government teaching job after spending more than 3 years teaching in private schools. I met my wife earlier 2019, she was in her final year in school, we dated throughout the year and planned to get married after she graduated. She graduated and we make a move for our introduction, then we suggested to have the marriage before she go for her Nysc so as to enable her serve in our home state as I already have a rented apartment to start a small family.

As we were planning for the marriage, we were also planning her NYSC. She was required to have a medical certificate for the NYSC which of course required blood test including genotype. She came back with the result of her genotype as AS. That was the only time I remember to take genotype issue serious. Even if I have some little knowledge about it before, I decided to research more about it on the internet and also met some of my friends who are medically inclined. I came to realize my own genotype test is also important at that moment. I might have done the test in school but I didn't pay attention to it usefulness so I don't remember the result.

I don't usually fall sick except for normal malaria when there is mosquito bite, never had a drip line in my body for once, never slept in a hospital bed, I don't have any reason to take note of my genotype or blood test.

Her results then prompt me to have my own test done too which came out to be AS also. By these periods we have convinced our families to choose a date for the marriage so that we can have the wedding before her NYSC. Marriage is to hold in a week time when I got my own genotype result.
From my further findings about AS and AS couple, I discovered how risky it is for their offsprings. I tried to explain to her but she turned a deaf ear, she alleged me of trying to break her heart at that critical period. She reported to her sisters they tried to blame me but I make them all realized it's not my fault because throughout my visitation and introduction to their family nobody has ever ask us about genotype. I am an orphan, I don't have any closer family to guide me except for my sisters who can't wait for me to get married because of my age, they also had never thought of it as well.

My wife sisters gave us some examples of older couples who were both AS with only one or no sickler among their children. My wife also made a threat of killing herself or she kill me if the marriage didn't hold. She even suggested we proceed with the marriage and break up after few weeks of marriage because of the shame that may follow if we stop the marriage or maybe she was desperate because of the marriage certificate, I don't know. I maintained my stand of backing off the marriage but she reported to my sisters also. Her sisters and my sisters later tried to encourage us to go ahead with prayers since we have chosen the date. We were advised not to disclose our genotype result to anyone again because people will discourage us.

Even though I was skeptical about the marriage, it later commenced with less spending because the Nikkah was held in a mosque and a tent for refreshments.
After the marriage we tried to talk about it, and she told me, she was afraid, may be she was pregnant before the marriage that's why she insisted on going ahead with the marriage. She also revealed to me that she was not happy with the decision as well, means she also know the implications but she have to avoid the shame of stopping the marriage after inviting guests to the occasion.

During these period genotype before the marriage, my love for her reduced drastically because of her desperation and her refusal to understand the risk we are about to take. I tried to avoid pregnancy from our first month of marriage but I later gave up and she conceived immediately. Now she is closer to her delivery. We hardly talk or play together inside. We only discuss about feeding, maternity and things to get for the coming baby.
I discovered we quarrel over little things that can be over looked by lovers. I'm not happy in the marriage, I spend most of time watching TV or stay outside all day because of unresolved issues.

I'm planning to arrange for a divorce after she delivered the baby because this is my first baby and I would love to have 2 or 3 kids more. I can't take the risk of allowing any of my children to be a sickler.
Advise is needed if my plan for divorce is a good one and do I stand a chance of loosing anything?
hmmmnn if u born sickler its not easy o. After this child is born dont try to get her pregnant again until a miracle that will change either of your genotypes. In d meantime ur case is not that bad cos ure a Muslim and u can marry another wife. So for now be using condom wen sleeping with ur wife.
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by EmmyDJourno: 5:45pm On Jun 09, 2020
You are not serious, time to be strong for your family u dey do fluppor

When u should've called it off you didn't now you want you do what...... angry

Better go and face your matters with her and make it work

Matterz settled by the elders remains settled cool
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by freshbear(m): 5:50pm On Jun 09, 2020
KanwuliaExtra:



Na me you wan take drag dis dull thread to reach page 3? undecided

Getting emotional indeed. Over an over-flogged, drrrrrry topic?


Please buzz of my mentions and keep your “funky genotypes“ off my ID.
Thanks.


*like me dey come NL with uselesss recycled tory about ancient, genetic, blood craw-craws from cyber nonentities phew*
THIS WOMAN NO GET SENSE AT ALL.
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by Ishaquine(m): 5:55pm On Jun 09, 2020
lamidi21:
What you need now is thinking on how to support your wife and your child to have a good life in this our challenging country ,not thinking of divorce , unless you are telling us you don't love her before now.
From your narration it seems you are Muslim , if you are desperate in getting divorce its better you discuss with her and both of agreed.
Then get marry to your wish.
May God be with us all.
Don't mind him, thinking of himself. The baby needs both parents right from after birth.
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by flyforall: 5:57pm On Jun 09, 2020
Only God can save you here.
A test can be done when the mother is 3-5 months pregnant.
If it turns out to be SS then the doctors will give you medical advice.
I have gone through the same issue while courting some years back.
Doctors only found out during the pregnancy that the mother was AC.
Although not in Nigeria the doctors advised us to have a still born which we did.
Thereafter we took a trip to the sickle cell hospital.
Pls believe me the i say no child should suffer that agony due to the selfishness of parents.
Be Guided!
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by Lovelyn451(f): 6:05pm On Jun 09, 2020
You're a simpleton! Weakling!! I'm not sure you've seen someone living with sickle cell b4, have u clean the sore on their foot b4? Have u watch them wrigle in pains and all u could do is cry for them without knowing how to help? cos if u have, even if u got the genotype result on ur wedding day you'll cancel it...

1 Like

Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by Sanishu: 6:09pm On Jun 09, 2020
The only thing I will tell you brother is to change your way and support your wife. Am in such situations B4 but we end the relationship B4 marriage. And the second time we ended it also. But now support your wife please.
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by Nobody: 6:12pm On Jun 09, 2020
ZeroShenanigan:
I'm above mid thirties, finished NYSC 2015 and i just secured a government teaching job after spending more than 3 years teaching in private schools. I met my wife earlier 2019, she was in her final year in school, we dated throughout the year and planned to get married after she graduated. She graduated and we make a move for our introduction, then we suggested to have the marriage before she go for her Nysc so as to enable her serve in our home state as I already have a rented apartment to start a small family.

As we were planning for the marriage, we were also planning her NYSC. She was required to have a medical certificate for the NYSC which of course required blood test including genotype. She came back with the result of her genotype as AS. That was the only time I remember to take genotype issue serious. Even if I have some little knowledge about it before, I decided to research more about it on the internet and also met some of my friends who are medically inclined. I came to realize my own genotype test is also important at that moment. I might have done the test in school but I didn't pay attention to it usefulness so I don't remember the result.

I don't usually fall sick except for normal malaria when there is mosquito bite, never had a drip line in my body for once, never slept in a hospital bed, I don't have any reason to take note of my genotype or blood test.

Her results then prompt me to have my own test done too which came out to be AS also. By these periods we have convinced our families to choose a date for the marriage so that we can have the wedding before her NYSC. Marriage is to hold in a week time when I got my own genotype result.
From my further findings about AS and AS couple, I discovered how risky it is for their offsprings. I tried to explain to her but she turned a deaf ear, she alleged me of trying to break her heart at that critical period. She reported to her sisters they tried to blame me but I make them all realized it's not my fault because throughout my visitation and introduction to their family nobody has ever ask us about genotype. I am an orphan, I don't have any closer family to guide me except for my sisters who can't wait for me to get married because of my age, they also had never thought of it as well.

My wife sisters gave us some examples of older couples who were both AS with only one or no sickler among their children. My wife also made a threat of killing herself or she kill me if the marriage didn't hold. She even suggested we proceed with the marriage and break up after few weeks of marriage because of the shame that may follow if we stop the marriage or maybe she was desperate because of the marriage certificate, I don't know. I maintained my stand of backing off the marriage but she reported to my sisters also. Her sisters and my sisters later tried to encourage us to go ahead with prayers since we have chosen the date. We were advised not to disclose our genotype result to anyone again because people will discourage us.

Even though I was skeptical about the marriage, it later commenced with less spending because the Nikkah was held in a mosque and a tent for refreshments.
After the marriage we tried to talk about it, and she told me, she was afraid, may be she was pregnant before the marriage that's why she insisted on going ahead with the marriage. She also revealed to me that she was not happy with the decision as well, means she also know the implications but she have to avoid the shame of stopping the marriage after inviting guests to the occasion.

During these period genotype before the marriage, my love for her reduced drastically because of her desperation and her refusal to understand the risk we are about to take. I tried to avoid pregnancy from our first month of marriage but I later gave up and she conceived immediately. Now she is closer to her delivery. We hardly talk or play together inside. We only discuss about feeding, maternity and things to get for the coming baby.
I discovered we quarrel over little things that can be over looked by lovers. I'm not happy in the marriage, I spend most of time watching TV or stay outside all day because of unresolved issues.

I'm planning to arrange for a divorce after she delivered the baby because this is my first baby and I would love to have 2 or 3 kids more. I can't take the risk of allowing any of my children to be a sickler.
Advise is needed if my plan for divorce is a good one and do I stand a chance of loosing anything?

Boy you are an ass. you did not grow past 17 years......
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by seniorgozman(m): 6:13pm On Jun 09, 2020
There is no cause for alarm, if you have any stickler do bone marrow transplant for the child
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by Fordactor(m): 6:31pm On Jun 09, 2020
ZeroShenanigan:
I'm above mid thirties, finished NYSC 2015 and i just secured a government teaching job after spending more than 3 years teaching in private schools. I met my wife earlier 2019, she was in her final year in school, we dated throughout the year and planned to get married after she graduated. She graduated and we make a move for our introduction, then we suggested to have the marriage before she go for her Nysc so as to enable her serve in our home state as I already have a rented apartment to start a small family.

As we were planning for the marriage, we were also planning her NYSC. She was required to have a medical certificate for the NYSC which of course required blood test including genotype. She came back with the result of her genotype as AS. That was the only time I remember to take genotype issue serious. Even if I have some little knowledge about it before, I decided to research more about it on the internet and also met some of my friends who are medically inclined. I came to realize my own genotype test is also important at that moment. I might have done the test in school but I didn't pay attention to it usefulness so I don't remember the result.

I don't usually fall sick except for normal malaria when there is mosquito bite, never had a drip line in my body for once, never slept in a hospital bed, I don't have any reason to take note of my genotype or blood test.

Her results then prompt me to have my own test done too which came out to be AS also. By these periods we have convinced our families to choose a date for the marriage so that we can have the wedding before her NYSC. Marriage is to hold in a week time when I got my own genotype result.
From my further findings about AS and AS couple, I discovered how risky it is for their offsprings. I tried to explain to her but she turned a deaf ear, she alleged me of trying to break her heart at that critical period. She reported to her sisters they tried to blame me but I make them all realized it's not my fault because throughout my visitation and introduction to their family nobody has ever ask us about genotype. I am an orphan, I don't have any closer family to guide me except for my sisters who can't wait for me to get married because of my age, they also had never thought of it as well.

My wife sisters gave us some examples of older couples who were both AS with only one or no sickler among their children. My wife also made a threat of killing herself or she kill me if the marriage didn't hold. She even suggested we proceed with the marriage and break up after few weeks of marriage because of the shame that may follow if we stop the marriage or maybe she was desperate because of the marriage certificate, I don't know. I maintained my stand of backing off the marriage but she reported to my sisters also. Her sisters and my sisters later tried to encourage us to go ahead with prayers since we have chosen the date. We were advised not to disclose our genotype result to anyone again because people will discourage us.

Even though I was skeptical about the marriage, it later commenced with less spending because the Nikkah was held in a mosque and a tent for refreshments.
After the marriage we tried to talk about it, and she told me, she was afraid, may be she was pregnant before the marriage that's why she insisted on going ahead with the marriage. She also revealed to me that she was not happy with the decision as well, means she also know the implications but she have to avoid the shame of stopping the marriage after inviting guests to the occasion.

During these period genotype before the marriage, my love for her reduced drastically because of her desperation and her refusal to understand the risk we are about to take. I tried to avoid pregnancy from our first month of marriage but I later gave up and she conceived immediately. Now she is closer to her delivery. We hardly talk or play together inside. We only discuss about feeding, maternity and things to get for the coming baby.
I discovered we quarrel over little things that can be over looked by lovers. I'm not happy in the marriage, I spend most of time watching TV or stay outside all day because of unresolved issues.

I'm planning to arrange for a divorce after she delivered the baby because this is my first baby and I would love to have 2 or 3 kids more. I can't take the risk of allowing any of my children to be a sickler.
Advise is needed if my plan for divorce is a good one and do I stand a chance of loosing anything?
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by tunize(m): 6:32pm On Jun 09, 2020
hmmm na wa bro u should have stand by ur decision now. life is simple u weigh ur options and that includes personal decision and also filtering of advice because, if anything goes wrong u are the one with the load and not those ppl. in ur case now u are d one scared and not ur sisters or ur wife's family. the deed has been done jst be hopeful i pray and wish ur baby comes out to be an AS, bro show ur wife love. God bless uou
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by Fordactor(m): 6:35pm On Jun 09, 2020
ZeroShenanigan:
I'm above mid thirties, finished NYSC 2015 and i just secured a government teaching job after spending more than 3 years teaching in private schools. I met my wife earlier 2019, she was in her final year in school, we dated throughout the year and planned to get married after she graduated. She graduated and we make a move for our introduction, then we suggested to have the marriage before she go for her Nysc so as to enable her serve in our home state as I already have a rented apartment to start a small family.

As we were planning for the marriage, we were also planning her NYSC. She was required to have a medical certificate for the NYSC which of course required blood test including genotype. She came back with the result of her genotype as AS. That was the only time I remember to take genotype issue serious. Even if I have some little knowledge about it before, I decided to research more about it on the internet and also met some of my friends who are medically inclined. I came to realize my own genotype test is also important at that moment. I might have done the test in school but I didn't pay attention to it usefulness so I don't remember the result.

I don't usually fall sick except for normal malaria when there is mosquito bite, never had a drip line in my body for once, never slept in a hospital bed, I don't have any reason to take note of my genotype or blood test.

Her results then prompt me to have my own test done too which came out to be AS also. By these periods we have convinced our families to choose a date for the marriage so that we can have the wedding before her NYSC. Marriage is to hold in a week time when I got my own genotype result.
From my further findings about AS and AS couple, I discovered how risky it is for their offsprings. I tried to explain to her but she turned a deaf ear, she alleged me of trying to break her heart at that critical period. She reported to her sisters they tried to blame me but I make them all realized it's not my fault because throughout my visitation and introduction to their family nobody has ever ask us about genotype. I am an orphan, I don't have any closer family to guide me except for my sisters who can't wait for me to get married because of my age, they also had never thought of it as well.

My wife sisters gave us some examples of older couples who were both AS with only one or no sickler among their children. My wife also made a threat of killing herself or she kill me if the marriage didn't hold. She even suggested we proceed with the marriage and break up after few weeks of marriage because of the shame that may follow if we stop the marriage or maybe she was desperate because of the marriage certificate, I don't know. I maintained my stand of backing off the marriage but she reported to my sisters also. Her sisters and my sisters later tried to encourage us to go ahead with prayers since we have chosen the date. We were advised not to disclose our genotype result to anyone again because people will discourage us.

Even though I was skeptical about the marriage, it later commenced with less spending because the Nikkah was held in a mosque and a tent for refreshments.
After the marriage we tried to talk about it, and she told me, she was afraid, may be she was pregnant before the marriage that's why she insisted on going ahead with the marriage. She also revealed to me that she was not happy with the decision as well, means she also know the implications but she have to avoid the shame of stopping the marriage after inviting guests to the occasion.

During these period genotype before the marriage, my love for her reduced drastically because of her desperation and her refusal to understand the risk we are about to take. I tried to avoid pregnancy from our first month of marriage but I later gave up and she conceived immediately. Now she is closer to her delivery. We hardly talk or play together inside. We only discuss about feeding, maternity and things to get for the coming baby.
I discovered we quarrel over little things that can be over looked by lovers. I'm not happy in the marriage, I spend most of time watching TV or stay outside all day because of unresolved issues.

I'm planning to arrange for a divorce after she delivered the baby because this is my first baby and I would love to have 2 or 3 kids more. I can't take the risk of allowing any of my children to be a sickler.
Advise is needed if my plan for divorce is a good one and do I stand a chance of loosing anything?
please don't let this issue bring u guys apart love her the real way u met her u never can tell what God has 4 you both
Re: Genotype: The Reason For My Unhappy Marriage. by Casper21: 6:50pm On Jun 09, 2020
Really bleeped up shii. You shouldn't break the marriage yet, wait till the baby's born and when it comes out AS, then stick to the marriage. And I advise you don't bear any other child again. One child is okay for u nd ur wife. If u want more, u can adopt

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