@Topic
Would you pay his bill ?? I wonder what you want him want him to do. We are happy that we have a brother who cares about his job and not on welfare, all you want is for him to stay at home and fukc until you break his joy-stick !!!

Stop complaining!!! Find another guy, then you will learn to appreciate your workaholic guy, (how hard is that).



Kenflipper

Well, you haven't even told us what this guy does for a living. Is he into IT, Banking, Marketing, Bricklaying, Fashion designing e.t.c You have to let us know so we can tell u what your fate will be because if it's a banking job, sry, but you'll loose him to a sexier colleague of his but if he is into bricklaying, your relation ship will do better coz "nobody go tell am time to close, na fraustration go carry am come house. Best of all you'll have good nite's of smack-down and RAW,
Hope this was helpful

Well my new boyfriend is a business owner.  Recently he's gotten some new contracts and since then it seems like I never see him anymore.  

At the beginning I thought he was losing interest or had someone else.  But he opens up to me more and more, always answers his phone even when he's busy and tries his best to call me whenever possible. He's been very patient with me.

So in return, I give him his space, understand that what he's doing is honourable and worthy of respect, and I support him as much as I can by making his burden easier.

I cook for him and take it to his job.  I buy him vitamins and supplements to ensure he keeps up his strength.  I don't nag or complain about needing attention.  Although some days he can hear it in my voice and he would say "I know it feels like I've been neglecting you, I know you need attention. I just have to work. When I see you, you will know." He doesn't get into much emotional talk, but I know what he means  

Whenever we talk I try to keep it upbeat, because I know he has enough stress on the job. Every morning, I send him a text message telling him how wonderful he is and how happy I am to be in his life, or I call to tell him have a productive day.

One day I didnt send any, because I thought it was no big deal to him.  He call me a few hours later and said "Hi! I didn't get any text message today. What happened?  "

So far, I'm seeing the benefits.  Although it has not been easy (harder on me than on him), I feel us getting closer.  He doesn't pull away, but he comes closer to me, and the quality time we spend together when we finally see each other is much much better.

Men don't think like women.  When you nag they shut down emotionally.  They respond to voids (silence, ignoring them). They begin to wonder what's wrong when you stop talking.

If you want to get his attention and feel neglected, try these little tricks (in moderation)  They work for me  

1.  Stop being available for a little while - example, sometimes when he calls, I don't answer my phone, or I turn it off
   (drives him crazy)  .  Or, stop doing things he's grown accostumed to, like me cooking and taking it to his office.
   He'll notice and wonder what's going on.

2.   When he calls, don't complain, pout.  Give him short answers like "Okay" "Fine" "No problem" "Yes" "I'm fine!"
     "Bye".   Believe me, just the change of the tone of your voice from sweet loving and accomodating, to stone cold works better than a whiny "You don't spend time with me anymoorrrrrre"

3.  Agree with him.   When the two of you get into an argument and he says things like "LOOK! You know what? I'm not coming to see you today.  I was going to, but I won't!" .  Ladies, what do you say? "FINE! I AGREE! DON'T COME!!"   See if he will not cool down like cold soup and say "What?? Ok ok honey, I'm sorry ok? I'll see you later."  

4. Go out with your friends and mention by the way to him there's a guy who's single and interested in you in the group.  (He won't stop asking questions - who is this guy? where did you meet him? what does he look like? who else is going to this party?)

Remember that as a workaholic (assuming that nothing is wrong with your relationship), he has enough stress as it is, a woman is supposed to add positive things to his life, and he will value that, even if he doesn't say it in words.  His actions will tell you, as he compromises and tries to work you into his life as well.

@richie-x
Take that picture down !!! what do you think you are doing ?? You look like a hired killer. you have no business taking pictures if you are not photogenic !

ngbo OP trinigirl says, when he does finally get the chance to call you up don't pick up the phone, then when you do finally pick up the phone nag, tell him not to come see you when he gets the little free time he gets, oh and tell him you're interested in somebody else.
Don't do these things.
@trini-girl very bad subset of advices.
I wonder why some girls think this way.

wasnt he workaholic when u met him?
just hate women that always find reason to complain.
stop pressing too hard on ur guy,if u dont want a surprise break up.
thank God your guy is fit and making sacrifice for u and would be kids.

proverbial:

ngbo OP, when he does finally get the chance to call you up don't pick up the phone, then when you do finally pick up the phone nag, tell him not to come see you when he gets the little free time he gets, oh and tell him you're interested in somebody else.

@trini-girl very bad subset of advices.
I wonder why some girls think this way.

proverbial, what's wrong with my advice?  you misread. i never said nag, i said DON'T NAG! In fact nothing you said there shows you understand what I wrote AT ALL!

@trini-girl very bad subset of advices.
I wonder why some girls think this way.

Leave her,she will learn later in life

@topic
Just curious, Food for thought!!!

Are you 101% sure he is working and not 'working out" someone else

Nah cuss me oo, questions mek fuh ask, becos if yo cuss me, me ah go cuss yo tail back,

Islander:

@topic
Just curious, Food for thought!!!

Are you 101% sure he is working and not 'working out" someone else

Nah cuss me oo, questions mek fuh ask, because if yo cuss me, me ah go cuss yo tail back,

It's only you that will think that way

roverbial, what's wrong with my advice? you misread. i never said nag, i said DON'T NAG! In fact nothing you said there shows you understand what I wrote AT ALL!

oh, you mean my attempt to paraphrase was subpar? Are you saying it should be worse than that .

Omo Eko:

It's only you that will think that way

WRONG!! maybe others are too shy to admit it. But you know I won't be,

@ TOPIC
The same type of thing happened to me and he had me fooled

until I caught him with one Obese woman on her knees sucking on "you know what"
His excuse , "I'm just working up my way to promotions and better pay".

I dumped his broke ass and worked my way up to his big, big boss. MR. KissMeDry.

Sweet T:

@richie-x
Take that picture down !!! what do you think you are doing ?? You look like a hired killer. you have no business taking pictures if you are not photogenic !

heheh, holla at ur boi, in dallas, monacoprince007@yahoo.co.uk

caradona,caradona and caradona again, how many times is that? 3 times abi ?
now tell me why are u so naughty?

so wat if he works ? @ least he's not a bumb
if u dont want him , abeg dash me

thank u omoge , i hate all these gurls wey just wants guys all the time. at their own convienience, she the guy no get life? abeg , me self dey enjoy to dey work , i get dreams,aspirations and goals, a lady as to be understanding , I guy as to be da man ,

Ah shut up sweet T, my mum likes me just d way i am, my girlfriend thinks i'm cute so does seun

The best advice given was dat by Trini girl. It will be wise for ladies to take a cue from her.
Let's be honest here- the guy may really be "working on his job" or may be "working someone else"
either way, wen u show him such luv and concern as Trini girl does; he will luv u more and respect u.

Let's be factual here and ask some questions. What makes a guy cheat on his girl? Ans- he sees in the other lady what he doesnt see in his girl.
What then do u think his girl should do? Be current,equipping herself with the latest technology all in the bid to keep her man. When I say technology I dont mean Microsoft or Oracle. I mean get to know what he loves, read about what men like and practise new things with him (new tins here necessarily not mean love making).

Its just like having a job. Companies dont need people who cant up their game. How can u be doing the same thing for 5yrs without improving!U ARE SIMPLY NOT ADDING VALUE TO THE COMPANY! Same thing goes for a relationship or marriage. Improve.Get smarter, prettier, tougher, more caring and loving. Support his career goals, be industrious, manage effectively the little he gives u and never NAG.(Alot of people dont know there is a big diff btw nagging and complaining)

So girls take my advice (remember its coming from a guy) and that of Trini girl ( exactly what I am expecting from my girl). Luv ya

richie-x:

Ah shut up sweet T, my mum likes me just d way i am, my girlfriend thinks i'm cute so does seun

I dont doubt that. and honestly, i think u arent bad. But I believe the shot was too close (u know it brought out the pimps and some other stuff) try and fix one that is not too close or zoomed out. U fine jare

I think Obanikoro and trinigirl are right. Pity some pple didnt understand what "spice up" means. Y r guys complaining girls need attention. if you wont give your woman/man d deserved amount of attention, someone else will give them! wen ladies clamour for attention, it means they really really like you!

@ seun
If a guy was toasting me and i knew he was too busy for me, there wont be a relationship. the problem is most guys find time to do the toasting and once they got d girl they settle in into their old life pattern! Dont get me wrong, i work too and a lot of times am busy as hell, and sometimes i fall back on the attention i should be giving but its MOST DEFINATELY not all d time. Even when i fall back, i try making up for it.  Love is like a garden. it thrives and flourishes only if its giving the right amount of attention

Besides, Ireti pipe maa n fa irewesi okan- (not sure how to translate) prolonged expectations diminishes passion and will power.

this is by no means a reason why you should nag/bore/kill/ruin your otherwise beautiful relationship with incessant complaints/dissatisfaction!

Being a WORKAHOLIC is a psycological problem.  It needs one with great patient to deal with it.

I was once a workaholic but with the help of people especially my man i was able to get over it.  It is something that make one to be a workaholic.  Oh baby change your attitude towards your man, no matter the time even if it is a minutes always have your hands open wide to give him a warm welcome.  Your nagging , constant complaining will always drive him deeper into his job.  Being always with his job is the only place he feel he can get help out of his depression or insecurity over something, believe me i have being there before and no one will like the ill experience the feel of the unknown "if not for my work, " stuff.   Workaholic is just the same thing like being an alcoholic the only different  is the drink.  But  both is addictive in nature, both needs medical help to come out of it, both is a psycology problem, both needs a loving, caring and attentive guardain angel to walk out of it.

Trini and Obanikoro . . . it culdnt have been better without both of you. thanx dearies.

This is much ado about nothing. Anytime it is 5 o'clock

just rub your eye pencil and pick up your hand back then

go straight to his office and that way you guys can get to

stay the time together and maybe do what I would not do.

@ poster, I have just one question for you; can you cook love?

i dont remember her saying she nags him about his work,

some ppl always have to go to extremes huh?! , maybe its just something she's noticed that she aint happy about and she's still trying to figure out her way round it!

make una no dey tell her say her nagging is not helping, or will not help bla bla bla, because she didnt say thats what she does now,

There's a difference between nagging and expressing ur self, if some ppl choose to label the fact that u are upfront enuff with ur bf to tell him when he does something wrong, that u dont like it!, then tough cookies

@Gollum, express urself, IT'S NOT NAGGING, make ur feelings known, and then say how u would want things to be better, he can say
'i'm sorry its the hours i signed up to do, but i'll see how we can work around both our lives' or he can say

' sorry hun, right now is a busy period at work things should calm down soon, its just a phase' or he can say

'i'm sorry i just cant help myself, everytime i want to sop something comes up, and i have to put in the over time-but i know ur worried about it pulling us apart, so i'll see what i can do'

eitherway, he knows how u feel about the whole thing, and what hebmight lose if things continue. and if he says the last sentence, then u got to let him know, that u understand he needs to work, but he nees to find the balance, be independent, but be sure he understands it takes 2 to make a r/ship work

I will advise you as follow:

1.  Visit a "babalawo"
2.  Do a juju to hypnotise him into resigning his work.
3.  You will be surprised how sweet it is to stay around 24/7 with your husband and he will be etternally grateful to you for this.

This is what I did when my wife was overworking herself and didnt have time for me.

In case you don't know any babalawo around you, call me on 0803333333419 to give you one's number that is very potent.

Good luck.

@poster,
Maybe he works 4 ur sake 2 provide 4 u and keep d r/ship sailing well 4 d both of u. Already u ladies say it is money that keeps love going.

i hope he is not denying you anything in anyway!

@Topic

Why don't you get off your butt and put in some work hours yourself to help him out----that is if you are not working oh!  If you are working too, then I take that back and I think you have some serious issues!  I cannot imagine that I have a man who is married to his work!  Oh girl---------- na trouble be that oh!  Especially with all these telephone numbers of the "ex-boyfriends" who live within and outside city limits or around the block, that make very good counselors he he he he!

@ Trini girl

YOU GET AM RIGHT!  YOU WILL HAVE A LONG LASTING RELATIONSHIP!  You understand the guys well well!  No need for too much talk!  That is one major problem we gals have!  We need explanation for everything! Let your actions do the work!  Less talk talk! I SAY YOU ARE THE WINNER! 50 gunshots in your direction oh!  TO-ZAAAAAAAAAAAAA! x50!