Sixfeetbelle:


@ the bold, why are men not just getting laid then? Why move ten steps further and wife her? I mean they know these things about women, they've seen it over and over again, yet they are the ones going down on their knees and proposing to women every other day. Even in the so-called western societies.

Riddle me this: If men know women are a "liability" and lazy, and jobless and entitled and all manner of adjectives you can think of, why are men still looking to tie a woman down to them?

lol .. you are just naive.
you think men are really ready to marry like that....do you know how ladies disturb and pressurise there men on when he will marry.

who cry every now and then about not getting married.....lol

Sixfeetbelle:




If all these things are important to you guys, why the wailing and ranting all over the place? It is not as if most of you will be very comfortable with a scenario where wifey earns more than you thus indirectly being the head of the house. Because this constant beacon call for women to take up more financial responsibilities is pushing for a paradigm shift that men's ego are not ready to deal with.

So manage the situation, please. If she's loving and submissive, what else do you guys need?

If she's loving, caring and submissive...

I don't need anything else

After all, what else can I ask from a woman called my wife

BUT! Just that shouldn't give way to laziness and the mentality of that's all there is to being a good wife...

Godoverevery:

lol .. you are just naive.
you think men are really ready to marry like that....do you know how ladies disturb and pressurise there men on when he will marry.

who cry every now and then about not getting married.....lol

Who are the ones crying for marriage when all we have presently are bad examples? Or is it the ones were the married ones are clamouring to be single again?

I've said it that desperate women who aren't content give men this nonsense overbloated ego they have.

GreatMage:


For babies...

To create a home...

To have a healthy sex life...

And to fulfill the scripture...

And you can't do all this without marrying a woman?

There are homeless babies to adopt. Go ahead and create a home for them all by yourself and stop disturbing women to give you one. Help reduce the population. Your gene must not propagate in the earth

You can have a healthy sex life with a sex doll. You don't need women for that. Or better still, just thank the westerners for gay pride

Fulfil which scripture? As far as I know, Jesus and Paul never married, priests aren't married, and a whole lot of you guys can benefit from following in their footsteps

To be honest, I still don't see why you guys need women to be tied down to you in the name of marriage, and with this never-ending name calling and men's constant cry for more independent ladies, the gain women used to enjoy as a married woman is no longer there. We are suffering in marriage.

GreatMage:


Protection...

Manly comfort...

Assurance...

Mental and spiritual pillar...

A healthy sex life...

A man to call her own and lean on...

To carry and believe in her when others didn't...

How do you hope to protect her? Do you have swords or what? And protect her from what exactly? Scorching sun? Mosquito bites? Menstrual pains?

Manly comfort, hmmm, I may concede on this even though I don't see why someone who's never had it before will know they need it.

Assurance? How? Where you there when she was at her lowest point or will you be there? And how do you propose to give her this assurance? Will you be there when she's gained weight and looks unattractive? Or when she's stressed and depressed and lacks the desire to be with you sexually?

Mental and spiritual pillar. Tbh, I think men give women more mental and spiritual problems than relief, but hey, that's just my opinion.

A healthy sex life. One that is loyal to one lady or one that sticks it in every hole they see out there? Thanks but we'll pass.

Majority of you don't believe in your woman cause your fellow men have indoctrinated you into thinking all women are liars, so excuse me if I doubt the sincerity in your "assertion."



I am yet to be convinced on the importance of a man in my life. Sorry.

Sixfeetbelle:


How do you hope to protect her? Do you have swords or what? And protect her from what exactly? Scorching sun? Mosquito bites? Menstrual pains?

Manly comfort, hmmm, I may concede on this even though I don't see why someone who's never had it before will know they need it.

Assurance? How? Where you there when she was at her lowest point or will you be there? And how do you propose to give her this assurance? Will you be there when she's gained weight and looks unattractive? Or when she's stressed and depressed and lacks the desire to be with you sexually?

Mental and spiritual pillar. Tbh, I think men give women more mental and spiritual problems than relief, but hey, that's just my opinion.

A healthy sex life. One that is loyal to one lady or one that sticks it in every hole they see out there? Thanks but we'll pass.

Majority of you don't believe in your woman cause your fellow men have indoctrinated you into thinking all women are liars, so excuse me if I doubt the sincerity in your "assertion."



I am yet to be convinced on the importance of a man in my life. Sorry.

Now I understand. I really do.

The problem doesn't lie with the world but rather with you and how you see the world.

There's nothing that can convince a person who thinks the world is cold, heartless and with love or sincerity...

And also; when it comes to marriage...
The lady is the one that makes the selection.

So only you knows what you want.

A lady saw a charming, loving and caring man who tho not wealthy like davido but has prospect and can take care of his bills and his partner's.

Then she saw a toxic guy who is super rich but is arrogant and prideful.
She saw it all and knew deep within her who she should chose but unfortunately, the saying " I would rather cry in a Ferrari than cry in a bike" resounded in her head...

Married the super rich guy, got what she was looking for and then came regrets.

Everything you highlighted over there simply expose your heart and mind on relationship and family building which to be is kinda twisted.

Would have loved to tackle and correct your misgivings one at a time but as the Chinese would say:

"You can not crave a rotten wood"

The outlook of the world in your mind is just too twisted...

Sixfeetbelle:


And you can't do all this without marrying a woman?

There are homeless babies to adopt. Go ahead and create a home for them all by yourself and stop disturbing women to give you one. Help reduce the population. Your gene must not propagate in the earth

You can have a healthy sex life with a sex doll. You don't need women for that. Or better still, just thank the westerners for gay pride

Fulfil which scripture? As far as I know, Jesus and Paul never married, priests aren't married, and a whole lot of you guys can benefit from following in their footsteps

To be honest, I still don't see why you guys need women to be tied down to you in the name of marriage, and with this never-ending name calling and men's constant cry for more independent ladies, the gain women used to enjoy as a married woman is no longer there. We are suffering in marriage.

Like I said earlier:

Your view of the world is twisted...

You must have read alot of novels and watched alot of movies which wasn't helpful while growing up...

Sixfeetbelle:


@ the bold, why are men not just getting laid then? Why move ten steps further and wife her? I mean they know these things about women, they've seen it over and over again, yet they are the ones going down on their knees and proposing to women every other day. Even in the so-called western societies.

Riddle me this: If men know women are a "liability" and lazy, and jobless and entitled and all manner of adjectives you can think of, why are men still looking to tie a woman down to them?

Interesting questions.

Let's just say most men have been conditioned by the society to get married. If you don't, people would consider you an irresponsible person and may be pestering you.

Also, some men marry for religious reasons. They don't want to be guilty of sinful, non-marital intimacy.

Still some do so mainly because they want children.

As for those ones kneeling upandan, it's their cup of tea. That's what some redpillers call "simping." Why would an African man like me do that? Maybe it's because I always try to keep my emotional side under control and let reason reign.

Were it not for the fact that I am Christian (and try somewhat to live like one) I'd rather not marry at all if the only one available is materialistic and thinks intimacy is the only or best offer she has. Have I died since all these years that I haven't had it?

Godoverevery , what you wrote is nothing but the truth.
I can relate to almost all

GreatMage:


Now I understand. I really do.

The problem doesn't lie with the world but rather with you and how you see the world.

There's nothing that can convince a person who thinks the world is cold, heartless and with love or sincerity...

And also; when it comes to marriage...
The lady is the one that makes the selection.

So only you knows what you want.

A lady saw a charming, loving and caring man who tho not wealthy like davido but has prospect and can take care of his bills and his partner's.

Then she saw a toxic guy who is super rich but is arrogant and prideful.
She saw it all and knew deep within her who she should chose but unfortunately, the saying " I would rather cry in a Ferrari than cry in a bike" resounded in her head...

Married the super rich guy, got what she was looking for and then came regrets.

Everything you highlighted over there simply expose your heart and mind on relationship and family building which to be is kinda twisted.

Would have loved to tackle and correct your misgivings one at a time but as the Chinese would say:

"You can not crave a rotten wood"

The outlook of the world in your mind is just too twisted...

Yada, yada, yada...


I should have put a disclaimer up there that this was for educative purposes only but in typical nairaland fashion, when men can't debate a point further, they turn psychoanalysts on you. Spare me the balderdash you wrote up there, will you?

GreatMage:


Like I said earlier:

Your view of the world is twisted...

You must have read alot of novels and watched alot of movies which wasn't helpful while growing up...

I fail to see the correlation between my bibliophilia and its happily-ever-after riddled endings to having a twisted world view, but you're the expert so I'll leave it to you.

Bye.

FunnyDude:
Stop this complain. You're the man, go hustle and take care of your woman.That's the natural law of life.
If you don't want to take care of your woman, leave her alone and be single.

No one point a gun in your head that you must marry or be in a relationship.

Thankiu guyyy

ThaThinka:


Interesting questions.

Let's just say most men have been conditioned by the society to get married. If you don't, people would consider you an irresponsible person and may be pestering you.

Also, some men marry for religious reasons. They don't want to be guilty of sinful, non-marital intimacy.

Still some do so mainly because they want children.

As for those ones kneeling upandan, it's their cup of tea. That's what some redpillers call "simping." Why would an African man like me do that? Maybe it's because I always try to keep my emotional side under control and let reason reign.

Were it not for the fact that I am Christian (and try somewhat to live like one) I'd rather not marry at all if the only one available is materialistic and thinks intimacy is the only or best offer she has. Have I died since all these years that I haven't had it?

Hmmm.

@ the bold, isn't it ironic that they are heavily guilty of this sin even as single people? Hardly will you find a man that hasn't been a part of lust in one way or another. So generally speaking, if this is why men get married, eh... let's just say they're better off NOT married.

I have issues with the "getting married cause you want children" ideology. I mean, the devil works in mischievous ways and one wouldn't want to get stuck in a childless home for long. Asides, I still maintain men can have children outside of marriages. Orphanages are in their hundreds. Homeless children are in their millions. Good lord!

Proposing on bended knee is just being fancy. And maybe silly but I won't judge. My problem is the ugly beasts that may emerge when all the fanfare is done with.

Coming to you, you can still decide to NOT marry. Priesthood is the easiest way out of this predicament . Have you heard of gay pride? Yeah, that's another one. When I think of more, I'll definitely hala you


Conversationally, I believe that most men lack a proper discernment of why they are getting married. Marriage is for companionship, first and foremost, not children, not sex and definitely not for acquiring wealth. Building friendship with her, being her friend, and staying her friend ensures you two can weather the storms when they come waging in.

Sixfeetbelle:


Hmmm.

@ the bold, isn't it ironic that they are heavily guilty of this sin even as single people? Hardly will you find a man that hasn't been a part of lust in one way or another. So generally speaking, if this is why men get married, eh... let's just say they're better off NOT married.

I have issues with the "getting married cause you want children" ideology. I mean, the devil works in mischievous ways and one wouldn't want to get stuck in a childless home for long. Asides, I still maintain men can have children outside of marriages. Orphanages are in their hundreds. Homeless children are in their millions. Good lord!

Proposing on bended knee is just being fancy. And maybe silly but I won't judge. My problem is the ugly beasts that may emerge when all the fanfare is done with.

Coming to you, you can still decide to NOT marry. Priesthood is the easiest way out of this predicament . Have you heard of gay pride? Yeah, that's another one. When I think of more, I'll definitely hala you


Conversationally, I believe that most men lack a proper discernment of why they are getting married. Marriage is for companionship, first and foremost, not children, not sex and definitely not for acquiring wealth. Building friendship with her, being her friend, and staying her friend ensures you two can weather the storms when they come waging in.

I guess women must be saints then since you appear to think practically all men are guilty of lust. And for sexual sin, men commit it alone, right?

Also, does the fact that some men commit fornication before getting married means it's no longer a sin if they continue with it and forget marriage altogether? I'm struggling to grasp the point in that second paragraph ("Hmmm" was the first).

Regarding the bold, so you believe that? Strange. For someone that seems to have issue with men generally. And is that companionship the intimacy, which appears to be the only thing some ladies have to offer?

Stop generalising. All men are not the same - the same can also be said of women. You don't describe everyone by the traits of a few or even the majority. Try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt until they prove to not be worth it.

Because of the action of a proportion, for instance, many Westerners are suspicious of every Nigerian as being fraudulent. But the question is: do you agree to be called a fraud simply because you're a Nigerian?

ThaThinka:


I guess women must be saints then since you appear to think practically all men are guilty of lust. And for sexual sin, men commit it alone, right?

Regarding the bold, so you believe that? Strange. For someone that seems to have issue with men generally.

Stop generalising. All men are not the same - the same can also be said of women. You don't describe everyone by the traits of a few or even the majority. Try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt until they prove to not be worth it.

Because of the action of a proportion, for instance, many Westerners are suspicious of every Nigerian as being fraudulent. But the question is: do you agree to be called a fraud simply because you're a Nigerian?

Point of correction: I don't hate men. I think they're wonderful creatures. On the contrary, I hate men that aren't sexually disciplined. Men who carry sex for head, them I see as dogs. Sorry not sorry.

No need for the emotions. Every human being commit sexual sin, I agree. I was only responding to your examples though, nothing to it. Every other thing you pointed out, I probably agree too. So yeah.
Note to self: Give everyone benefit of the doubt.

For your last question, my peace I leave you:
"When a finger gets dipped in palm oil, it will eventually get to the rest of the hand" - Igbo proverb.

IamAngelica:
100% in support of this and i'm female..a high percentage of Nigerian women feel entitled to men to the extent that the man becomes their sole source of income which should not be so because as an individual, you owe yourself financial security and independence but most nigerian women prefer to be blood-sucking parasites instead of working for their money..i'm not saying he shouldn't buy you gifts but she should reciprocate (not boxers and singlets) and without these gifts she should be able to provide for herself, those gifts should be bonuses..girls that reason this way are seldom and will always be outnumbered..this in turn lead men to believe that every nigerian woman is like that too ;entitled, selfish, demanding and think that relationships are business deals..but dat one na talk for anoda day

Absolutely correct

Sixfeetbelle:


Yada, yada, yada...


I should have put a disclaimer up there that this was for educative purposes only but in typical nairaland fashion, when men can't debate a point further, they turn psychoanalysts on you. Spare me the balderdash you wrote up there, will you?

Alright...

Sixfeetbelle:


I fail to see the correlation between my bibliophilia and its happily-ever-after riddled endings to having a twisted world view, but you're the expert so I'll leave it to you.

Bye.

Okay...

At the end of the day...

Who am I to say ones ideology is wrong or the perspective of how they see the world and life itself is faulty

Oh by the way;

Any wuxia or xianxia novel reader or fan here?

Stephenmoka4:
I do not know where you pick or know your girls from, I am friends with a few girls and none is like that. All are putting work and looking for something profitable. They do take photos and all that fancy or girly things but, once in awhile.

It is either I am not noticing the kind of girl everyone is talking about or I should increase my female circle.

Most of these posters generalise here. What type of person comes to NL to rant about women everyday if not bitterness. Panophist needs to educate people

santos123:
Only ignorant guys with nothing to offer don't knw the value of ladies.

N some ladies don't know the value of good men even tho they can be broke at the time

FunnyDude:
Stop this complain. You're the man, go hustle and take care of your woman.That's the natural law of life.
If you don't want to take care of your woman, leave her alone and be single.

No one point a gun in your head that you must marry or be in a relationship.

With that mentality some shallow girls will use you.
U take care of each other in a relationship.
It isn't a transaction.
U can't say U don't want a woman to love you for who you are n not wat U give them.
U can take care of your wife or girl if she truly cares for u but some girls will want U just for Ur money.
Those girls are the ones guys on here are talking about.
U don't respect someone if U only date them for money.

IamAngelica:
100% in support of this and i'm female..a high percentage of Nigerian women feel entitled to men to the extent that the man becomes their sole source of income which should not be so because as an individual, you owe yourself financial security and independence but most nigerian women prefer to be blood-sucking parasites instead of working for their money..i'm not saying he shouldn't buy you gifts but she should reciprocate (not boxers and singlets) and without these gifts she should be able to provide for herself, those gifts should be bonuses..girls that reason this way are seldom and will always be outnumbered..this in turn lead men to believe that every nigerian woman is like that too ;entitled, selfish, demanding and think that relationships are business deals..but dat one na talk for anoda day

I agree with you.

Mrscarter:


With that mentality some shallow girls will use you.
U take care of each other in a relationship.
It isn't a transaction.
U can't say U don't want a woman to love you for who you are n not wat U give them.
U can take care of your wife or girl if she truly cares for u but some girls will want U just for Ur money.
Those girls are the ones guys on here are talking about.
U don't respect someone if U only date them for money.

Well said, by the way.

I'm very smart with women. But I believe at some point (age) one should be over these kind of discussion.

Unless the op is a teenager or student.

FunnyDude:
Stop this complain. You're the man, go hustle and take care of your woman.That's the natural law of life.
If you don't want to take care of your woman, leave her alone and be single.

No one point a gun in your head that you must marry or be in a relationship.

Natural law? Established by who?

Go and find out the meaning of social construction of reality. There is no natural law apart from the one u and i and people in our society constructed.

And we can chamge it if we want

The OP has changed it for himself, just like i did many years ago as a teenager.

If u like, continue to leave under that law. Its ur life. Its ur choice

virginprincess:
I don't think you are a nigeria man, most nigeria men has every poor mentality and can never reason this way, very wonderful comment.

U call this wonderful comment because u are a woman.

When u have a son who spends stupidly on his girlfriend, we will have this conversation again.

FunnyDude:


Well said, by the way.

I'm very smart with women. But I believe at some point (age) one should be over these kind of discussion.

Unless the op is a teenager or student.

very funny.... funny dude indeed.

feel free to wallow in foolery dude ....FYI I graduated uni 8yrs ago and currently an employer of labour....

From what I can see, this thread applies to Nigerian women right?

u support a simp

virginprincess:
I don't think you are a nigeria man, most nigeria men has every poor mentality and can never reason this way, very wonderful comment.