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I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. - Family (12) - Nairaland

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I Cheated-my Marriage Is Falling Apart / I Walked In On My Parents Having Sex, Now I Feel So Embarrassed. / My Marriage Has Finally Ended (2) (3) (4)

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Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by fasbat(m): 10:31am On Dec 08, 2020
MeeztaFabulouz:
It is really terrible to feel suicidal all because of marriage. I use use to see different news of how people commit suicide because of relationships and I always felt it was so stupid to think of suicide just because of a fail relationship.

Now I have seen it all clear that depression is really very bad especially when you feel so depressed in a marriage you work so hard and do everything to protect and make your family happy. Its very painful when you know honestly inside your heart that you don't cheat on your wife, provide everything she wants for herself and the kids even when business is quite rough.

She has no conscience and no regard for our union and our home. I am a guy that don't think about looking at wife's phone or suspecting her for anything but then after our first child she changed completely and as of today I don't know were I stand anymore because of my kids. I opened a business for her just so that she won't be like a house wife but she has completely taken the business more important than the family and wake up 4am to start cooking and close 8pm at night. Stressing herself so much but always complaining business is not moving and she is not making any money.

I sponsor everything in the home though am not complaining because that's what a man should do, but she does not have regard for anything or appreciate anything I do. Can you imagine I give her money for feeding weekly even though she is running a food business, she buys few food stuffs in the house which can stay almost two weeks without us eating them because we basically feed from food she cooks in her restaurant. I decided not to bother myself and just give her money to always ensure her business is moving and at least food will not be a problem for us.

One faithful day, I decided to check her phone because I observed a certain strange behavior about her and how she likes to off her phone at night or sometimes when I am around. I saw different chats with some two guys she claimed one was her ex boyfriend that just likes to check on her once in a while, and the other guy was someone I remember like coming to eat in her restaurant but she said they went to school together and he is working with a construction company doing a building project close to her restaurant. She also claimed that when they were in school he was asking her out even till they fished school but she preferred her ex boyfriend to him and when she had issues with her ex that was when I came into her life.

If the story she told me is true or not, I wasn't really bothered anymore because I know its normal for a woman you met at 26 years to have met other guys before you and obviously still has guys that don't respect people's marriage and still do anything to sleep with a married woman. But my paid now is because I feel so respected by many of the things she does and when I think of divorce, I only feel for my kids who will now have to grow up with another man or having to visit their mum and see her with another man.

Recently I have become so depressed that I have been thinking of suicide so that my kids will know their dad is no more rather than knowing that their dad is still alive but can only be with either daddy or mummy and not as a complete family. My depression is getting worse especially when I think about all I have done for her and the kids just to always make them happy but in return, she doest appreciate or even have any regard anymore for what is called "FAMILY"

Over 7 years now and at this point I really feel suicidal. Please I really need help because I make this big mistake.
mix with friends a lot, do enough faaji, don't kill yourself because of woman, start dating a young lady, are you okay financially? If yes, you won't stay home much, jade, se faaji ara e!
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by ednut1(m): 10:32am On Dec 08, 2020
My number 1 rule in life - all man for himself
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by saasala(m): 10:35am On Dec 08, 2020
MeeztaFabulouz:


7 years of struggle to cater for and build a decent home, I have spoken so many times and to no avail. Since I was born up till this year, I hit a woman for the first time in my life. The reason is just because she did something stupid, I didn't want to get involved in any argument or fight, I just went to book a hotel room and had a quite time to myself that night till the next morning and on getting home she just attacked me saying I went to sleep with another woman.
I have given her the options so many times to go her way if she is not happy being with me but she won't go. As am writing this, I have not eaten her food since yesterday and I just got home only to see her serving me food and trying to make up but this is not the first time. I practically made her not go to the shop today and I was expecting to see that she went to the shop. When ever we talk, she listens and behave herself for a while but its like there is a spirit that comes into her and when it does, she forgets everything and only tries to bring trouble and more trouble.

Go back to your fathers house, she will not. Ok go and be with any other person that will tolerate your attitude she will not leave my house. All she does is money money money this and that. Even with her business, she does not use a dime for anything in the house aside her own stuffs.
Can you imagine she had a fight with me some time ago because I personally went to pay my kids school myself? All because I didn't give her the money to go and pay herself as I normally do?

Can you also imagine she had a fight with me one day all because I bought a jeans and slippers for myself without buying anything for her and the kids because I had bought some nice stuff for all of them including her like a week before then.

This is a woman that has never bought me even a boxers since marriage and has never gotten me anything gift for my birthday or anything but I just ignore all that and focus on making the family happy. Yet I am not happy in my home because I know what I go through especially this year that corona made things rough, I have passed through hell just to ensure my family is fine and we are not put to shame yet a matured thinking lady does not even care about anything.

Those saying I am a fool for thinking of suicide because of a woman, it is not because of the woman I am thinking of such, if you really know what depression can cause, knowing how hard you struggle to earn your money and spend it on someone who cares less for you, you will understand.

Oga, goan sidown. Till now you have not mentioned where you saw her chat sleeping with other men. You only saw her friendly chats with the guy. Did you see any part where they fvcked?

2 Likes

Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by PS712: 10:35am On Dec 08, 2020
Bigggloadofcum:
Hmm!

This matter carry weight o. As proper and justifiable as it is to check the phones of our spouses, the discovery might turn out to be SUICIDAL.

First, you are within ur marital right to check on ur wife's phone even though a few persons might disagree with that.

From your writeup I could deduce u are broke even though you try ur best to provide for ur family. The woman you married doesn't feel the need to respect someone who she feels she's better than financially.

This is a real story. When I was 9 my dad was going through serious financial challenges and even though my mum was totally supportive, he felt incomplete. One evening I saw my dad with a rope.

He didn't say a word to me... He went out. Late at night he didn't come home and we started looking for him but he was no where to be found. There was no phones like there is now.

Late on oga came back looking frail and disconnected from this earth. We welcomed him as usual. Next day he called me and told me that he had hung the rope to a tree and was about tying it round his neck but he thought about my siblings and I.

Few years down, thinks turned around tremendously. He became happy, our family became happy.

Now b4 you take that suicidal step, think of your children, double ur hustle but if that woman is cheating on you, kick her ass out. You deserve better.

A woman shouldn't be the end of you. There is always light at the end of the tunnel.
I am quoting the above verbatim for the OP and any other in similar situation, there's no better!
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by EgunMogaji2: 10:36am On Dec 08, 2020
Someone on front page last week was asking if he should get married. Your answer is here.

Here are somethings I’ve learnt through the school of hard knocks.

1) Treat your partners phone like it’s nuclear waste. A no go area. You’ll just give yourself massive depression or worse heart attack. She may not even be physically cheating but I can guarantee you that most married women are 100% emotionally cheating. There’s always one guy from school or neighborhood that will always have the key.

2) Don’t kill yourself over woman. She’ll move right on. You will too. There’s some women who I don’t even remember their names again. Imagine if I had killed myself grin

3) My advice to the 18 year old me would be face my studies, career and money. Having child out of wedlock is not taboo like before.

Anyways, married folks just be prayerful.

1 Like

Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by Encounter261(m): 10:36am On Dec 08, 2020
Are you really sure that you're the owner of those kids? DNA otherwise
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by cescky(m): 10:36am On Dec 08, 2020
MeeztaFabulouz:


7 years of struggle to cater for and build a decent home, I have spoken so many times and to no avail. Since I was born up till this year, I hit a woman for the first time in my life. The reason is just because she did something stupid, I didn't want to get involved in any argument or fight, I just went to book a hotel room and had a quite time to myself that night till the next morning and on getting home she just attacked me saying I went to sleep with another woman.
I have given her the options so many times to go her way if she is not happy being with me but she won't go. As am writing this, I have not eaten her food since yesterday and I just got home only to see her serving me food and trying to make up but this is not the first time. I practically made her not go to the shop today and I was expecting to see that she went to the shop. When ever we talk, she listens and behave herself for a while but its like there is a spirit that comes into her and when it does, she forgets everything and only tries to bring trouble and more trouble.

Go back to your fathers house, she will not. Ok go and be with any other person that will tolerate your attitude she will not leave my house. All she does is money money money this and that. Even with her business, she does not use a dime for anything in the house aside her own stuffs.
Can you imagine she had a fight with me some time ago because I personally went to pay my kids school myself? All because I didn't give her the money to go and pay herself as I normally do?

Can you also imagine she had a fight with me one day all because I bought a jeans and slippers for myself without buying anything for her and the kids because I had bought some nice stuff for all of them including her like a week before then.

This is a woman that has never bought me even a boxers since marriage and has never gotten me anything gift for my birthday or anything but I just ignore all that and focus on making the family happy. Yet I am not happy in my home because I know what I go through especially this year that corona made things rough, I have passed through hell just to ensure my family is fine and we are not put to shame yet a matured thinking lady does not even care about anything.

Those saying I am a fool for thinking of suicide because of a woman, it is not because of the woman I am thinking of such, if you really know what depression can cause, knowing how hard you struggle to earn your money and spend it on someone who cares less for you, you will understand.


Hello
Please and please and please and please and please in the name of your children stop this self pity.. Its not helping you, depression is an evil spirit and your embracing the demon with this self pity.. It can make you take your life even when you don't want to,its a demonic side chick of the devil, you dont want the devil ordering your steps.. If your Christian, suicide =hell, plus think of your children.


Look am not married, but life has dealt me blows.. And i know how you feel, because I've been suicidal myself in the past.. Its a terrible pit to be in, no one can help you, unless you want to climb out.. You can only receive help and overcome it by being strong, please stop the self pity, its more harmful than drugs.. Have you reported to her parents? Your parents? Her friends?.. Look all this pent of anger you're holding will give you sickness.. If she bleeped up beat her and release some of that anger in you.. Yes i said beat her, perhaps that can cure her madness.. You think your policy of ill not beat a woman will take you to heaven? Am not encouraging wife battery, but evidently that woman is killing you slowly.. Dont be foolish.

Stay strong.. If you can afford it separate from her for a while.. Rent another place.. And observe.. If she changes there's hope.. If she doesn't, my guy bible says its better to live on the roof of a house alone, than with a contentious woman.. Tru and invest in spy cameras and gadgets.. Catch her, and divorce her of shes cheating.. You deserve peace. You didn't form your kid, god did, he will be fine, God will take care of him, dont worry too much about him
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by lekki1444: 10:36am On Dec 08, 2020
Funkyswagzz:


Yah I suspect ur not from planet earth
I am not. planet earth is the degenerate planet for people who need to be punished
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by haaryobhami: 10:37am On Dec 08, 2020
MeeztaFabulouz:


7 years of struggle to cater for and build a decent home, I have spoken so many times and to no avail. Since I was born up till this year, I hit a woman for the first time in my life. The reason is just because she did something stupid, I didn't want to get involved in any argument or fight, I just went to book a hotel room and had a quite time to myself that night till the next morning and on getting home she just attacked me saying I went to sleep with another woman.
I have given her the options so many times to go her way if she is not happy being with me but she won't go. As am writing this, I have not eaten her food since yesterday and I just got home only to see her serving me food and trying to make up but this is not the first time. I practically made her not go to the shop today and I was expecting to see that she went to the shop. When ever we talk, she listens and behave herself for a while but its like there is a spirit that comes into her and when it does, she forgets everything and only tries to bring trouble and more trouble.

Go back to your fathers house, she will not. Ok go and be with any other person that will tolerate your attitude she will not leave my house. All she does is money money money this and that. Even with her business, she does not use a dime for anything in the house aside her own stuffs.
Can you imagine she had a fight with me some time ago because I personally went to pay my kids school myself? All because I didn't give her the money to go and pay herself as I normally do?

Can you also imagine she had a fight with me one day all because I bought a jeans and slippers for myself without buying anything for her and the kids because I had bought some nice stuff for all of them including her like a week before then.

This is a woman that has never bought me even a boxers since marriage and has never gotten me anything gift for my birthday or anything but I just ignore all that and focus on making the family happy. Yet I am not happy in my home because I know what I go through especially this year that corona made things rough, I have passed through hell just to ensure my family is fine and we are not put to shame yet a matured thinking lady does not even care about anything.

Those saying I am a fool for thinking of suicide because of a woman, it is not because of the woman I am thinking of such, if you really know what depression can cause, knowing how hard you struggle to earn your money and spend it on someone who cares less for you, you will understand.

u are so weak and she has seen u finish,u should have screenshot all d chat u saw as evidence.
take the children for dna test then Sue for divorce .
she is going to kill u one day if u urself don't end up Killin urself.
if the kids are urs ,just divorce and claim d right to keep them .
if u commit suicide, she would move on with another man,born for him and ur children will suffer..
don't be a selfish coward .
marriage is a scam BTW
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by EgunMogaji2: 10:37am On Dec 08, 2020
saasala:


Oga, goan sidown. Till now you have not mentioned where you saw her chat sleeping with other men. You only saw her friendly chats with the guy. Did you see any part where they fvcked?

I can forgive a one night stand maybe due to alcohol or pressure. I can never forgive emotional cheating. That’s who can kill you.
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by Chinny024(f): 10:39am On Dec 08, 2020
The good and best news to the men is that when you commit the suicide,it's an added advantage to flex,the guys will even troop in without knocking on the door. The bad news is that you are going to HELL!!!!

Choose wisely!!!
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by Nobody: 10:40am On Dec 08, 2020
MeeztaFabulouz:


7 years of struggle to cater for and build a decent home, I have spoken so many times and to no avail. Since I was born up till this year, I hit a woman for the first time in my life. The reason is just because she did something stupid, I didn't want to get involved in any argument or fight, I just went to book a hotel room and had a quite time to myself that night till the next morning and on getting home she just attacked me saying I went to sleep with another woman.
I have given her the options so many times to go her way if she is not happy being with me but she won't go. As am writing this, I have not eaten her food since yesterday and I just got home only to see her serving me food and trying to make up but this is not the first time. I practically made her not go to the shop today and I was expecting to see that she went to the shop. When ever we talk, she listens and behave herself for a while but its like there is a spirit that comes into her and when it does, she forgets everything and only tries to bring trouble and more trouble.

Go back to your fathers house, she will not. Ok go and be with any other person that will tolerate your attitude she will not leave my house. All she does is money money money this and that. Even with her business, she does not use a dime for anything in the house aside her own stuffs.
Can you imagine she had a fight with me some time ago because I personally went to pay my kids school myself? All because I didn't give her the money to go and pay herself as I normally do?

Can you also imagine she had a fight with me one day all because I bought a jeans and slippers for myself without buying anything for her and the kids because I had bought some nice stuff for all of them including her like a week before then.

This is a woman that has never bought me even a boxers since marriage and has never gotten me anything gift for my birthday or anything but I just ignore all that and focus on making the family happy. Yet I am not happy in my home because I know what I go through especially this year that corona made things rough, I have passed through hell just to ensure my family is fine and we are not put to shame yet a matured thinking lady does not even care about anything.

Those saying I am a fool for thinking of suicide because of a woman, it is not because of the woman I am thinking of such, if you really know what depression can cause, knowing how hard you struggle to earn your money and spend it on someone who cares less for you, you will understand.
Don't feel bad my brother if people said you were a fool. The truth is knowing you are depressed or cheated is the more reason why you shouldn't consider suicide. I have given my very best in my own marriage God is my witness but sometimes I feel I have received less in every aspect. Even my own very wedding was cancelled on the day of my wedding but because trad and court had already been done, I still moved on in it. What I experienced later on would never make me to blame my partner, NEVER. And do you know why, I saw the handwriting but I still went ahead. My resolution is to focus on building my goals and vision and must be ALIVE for the sake of my children. My advice is if you love your children, be alive for them. I wished there's a way I can personally talk to you about loving yourself and staying focus.
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by generationz(f): 10:41am On Dec 08, 2020
MeeztaFabulouz:


I have never looked forward to her assisting me financially and I am not accusing her of extramarital affairs. I feel bad being so disrespectful and not being caring for our home. There are many things I am unable to write because its like writing a book. Maybe if you think of how it feels when you dedicate yourself to someone then do everything to make that person happy and that person does not care and is only self centred then you will understand how painful it feels.
Seven years I have done all a man needs to do to try and build a peaceful and decent home, there are good times when we just overlook things and be happy and then that attitude just comes alive again from no where and all I get is trouble upon trouble again. Some days I can hardly even eat at home and in seven years, I can only remember hearing "am sorry" just twice apart from when I try to just ignore certain things and she just give me all those sober reactions.
I really don't know how to explain but I believe some married men here will understand better because it's like most comments I see are from people that are not married and don't understand what dedicating your life to someone you once loved so much means.


Don't commit suicide, please. Death is the only destination you can go where you can never return from. If you die, your kids will be left in the hands of one of those guys you don't know anything about. They'd be fatherless. Some step fathers are sexually and emotionally abusive to their stepchildren.

Did you have a traumatic childhood? No spouse can take the place of a mother/father. We have to go on a journey to find ourselves alone. We can't seek fulfillment in our spouse.

It seems like you love with all your heart without waiting for someone to prove themselves. Stop loving humans with all your heart because we are only humans with flaws and capable of falling. Try and develop your logical side so if you want to be in a relationship with someone, boundaries can be set that when broken by the person it won't shock you or hurt you that much. You still have lots of learning to do about people and the world.


I can't say I know the exact way you feel but I understand where you are coming from. It seems like after all these years you've made sacrifices it seems like nothing but let me tell you, your sacrifices are not unseen and you are not a fool.

Your kids are watching. They know what kind of Dad you are. If you die now, anyone can spin any story about who you are and you won't be there to defend yourself. You would be in agony on the other side watching knowing you are powerless.


Your wife has failed you. Don't fail your kids. Try and keep you chin up. Better days are ahead. If you need space, try and get space. If you can, always open up about how your wife's actions are wrong without waiting for her to tell you sorry and argue with you. That way she will know you have become immune to the pain. You have become numb. You have become emotionally self sufficient. We must find ourselves so we don't depend emotionally on others because they can't help us.


This thing you are experiencing from your wife, some people experience it from their parents even from a young age. Even worse than you have been through They have been so abused emotionally, physically, sexually by their guardian/parent that they don't have any kind of self esteem and struggle with depression all their lives. We all have ups and downs. We can't keep wallowing in self pity. We just have to dust ourselves up, count our losses and move on. Stay strong for the people who love us dearly.


Stay blessed.
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by HolyTitus(m): 10:42am On Dec 08, 2020
baralatie:

mister man something is wrong with you and not your wife o!
How? explain?
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by cescky(m): 10:43am On Dec 08, 2020
StacyO:

Your case is a very simple one.
This is why you want to commit suicide??

Depression is real but,you can get over it. It all depends on how you apply wisdom or man up.

Do you want her to start assisting financially??
Stop those extra marital affairs you think she might be into??
OR Be submissive??

I think you're just weak at heart.

Answer this questions and you might just get the help you need.

Very concise, mature and wise points..

Hes just wallowing in self pity.. Thats his problem.. He can't live that pit of self pity and no ome can assist him, if he doesn't of himself become stronger.. Snd it's dangerous place to be in because his thoughts and actions are no longer his..
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by tamunobello: 10:44am On Dec 08, 2020
Marriage problem
MeeztaFabulouz:
It is really terrible to feel suicidal all because of marriage. I use use to see different news of how people commit suicide because of relationships and I always felt it was so stupid to think of suicide just because of a fail relationship.

Now I have seen it all clear that depression is really very bad especially when you feel so depressed in a marriage you work so hard and do everything to protect and make your family happy. Its very painful when you know honestly inside your heart that you don't cheat on your wife, provide everything she wants for herself and the kids even when business is quite rough.

She has no conscience and no regard for our union and our home. I am a guy that don't think about looking at wife's phone or suspecting her for anything but then after our first child she changed completely and as of today I don't know were I stand anymore because of my kids. I opened a business for her just so that she won't be like a house wife but she has completely taken the business more important than the family and wake up 4am to start cooking and close 8pm at night. Stressing herself so much but always complaining business is not moving and she is not making any money.

I sponsor everything in the home though am not complaining because that's what a man should do, but she does not have regard for anything or appreciate anything I do. Can you imagine I give her money for feeding weekly even though she is running a food business, she buys few food stuffs in the house which can stay almost two weeks without us eating them because we basically feed from food she cooks in her restaurant. I decided not to bother myself and just give her money to always ensure her business is moving and at least food will not be a problem for us.

One faithful day, I decided to check her phone because I observed a certain strange behavior about her and how she likes to off her phone at night or sometimes when I am around. I saw different chats with some two guys she claimed one was her ex boyfriend that just likes to check on her once in a while, and the other guy was someone I remember like coming to eat in her restaurant but she said they went to school together and he is working with a construction company doing a building project close to her restaurant. She also claimed that when they were in school he was asking her out even till they fished school but she preferred her ex boyfriend to him and when she had issues with her ex that was when I came into her life.

If the story she told me is true or not, I wasn't really bothered anymore because I know its normal for a woman you met at 26 years to have met other guys before you and obviously still has guys that don't respect people's marriage and still do anything to sleep with a married woman. But my paid now is because I feel so respected by many of the things she does and when I think of divorce, I only feel for my kids who will now have to grow up with another man or having to visit their mum and see her with another man.

Recently I have become so depressed that I have been thinking of suicide so that my kids will know their dad is no more rather than knowing that their dad is still alive but can only be with either daddy or mummy and not as a complete family. My depression is getting worse especially when I think about all I have done for her and the kids just to always make them happy but in return, she doest appreciate or even have any regard anymore for what is called "FAMILY"

Over 7 years now and at this point I really feel suicidal. Please I really need help because I make this big mistake.
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by Nobody: 10:44am On Dec 08, 2020
It’s normal that guys will talk to your wife oh na how she handle am be the koko, I don’t see what the problem is that is making you suicidal. Your post was just all over the place.
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by bayulll011(m): 10:44am On Dec 08, 2020
MeeztaFabulouz:
It is really terrible to feel suicidal all because of marriage. I use use to see different news of how people commit suicide because of relationships and I always felt it was so stupid to think of suicide just because of a fail relationship.

Now I have seen it all clear that depression is really very bad especially when you feel so depressed in a marriage you work so hard and do everything to protect and make your family happy. Its very painful when you know honestly inside your heart that you don't cheat on your wife, provide everything she wants for herself and the kids even when business is quite rough.

She has no conscience and no regard for our union and our home. I am a guy that don't think about looking at wife's phone or suspecting her for anything but then after our first child she changed completely and as of today I don't know were I stand anymore because of my kids. I opened a business for her just so that she won't be like a house wife but she has completely taken the business more important than the family and wake up 4am to start cooking and close 8pm at night. Stressing herself so much but always complaining business is not moving and she is not making any money.

I sponsor everything in the home though am not complaining because that's what a man should do, but she does not have regard for anything or appreciate anything I do. Can you imagine I give her money for feeding weekly even though she is running a food business, she buys few food stuffs in the house which can stay almost two weeks without us eating them because we basically feed from food she cooks in her restaurant. I decided not to bother myself and just give her money to always ensure her business is moving and at least food will not be a problem for us.

One faithful day, I decided to check her phone because I observed a certain strange behavior about her and how she likes to off her phone at night or sometimes when I am around. I saw different chats with some two guys she claimed one was her ex boyfriend that just likes to check on her once in a while, and the other guy was someone I remember like coming to eat in her restaurant but she said they went to school together and he is working with a construction company doing a building project close to her restaurant. She also claimed that when they were in school he was asking her out even till they fished school but she preferred her ex boyfriend to him and when she had issues with her ex that was when I came into her life.

If the story she told me is true or not, I wasn't really bothered anymore because I know its normal for a woman you met at 26 years to have met other guys before you and obviously still has guys that don't respect people's marriage and still do anything to sleep with a married woman. But my paid now is because I feel so respected by many of the things she does and when I think of divorce, I only feel for my kids who will now have to grow up with another man or having to visit their mum and see her with another man.

Recently I have become so depressed that I have been thinking of suicide so that my kids will know their dad is no more rather than knowing that their dad is still alive but can only be with either daddy or mummy and not as a complete family. My depression is getting worse especially when I think about all I have done for her and the kids just to always make them happy but in return, she doest appreciate or even have any regard anymore for what is called "FAMILY"

Over 7 years now and at this point I really feel suicidal. Please I really need help because I make this big mistake.


shame on you.you are a disgrace to manhood.
someone that has no regards for you or the marriage vow and you think she wont kill you at the slightest opportunity.
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by SomehowBROWN(m): 10:45am On Dec 08, 2020
Bro! If feel ur ranting selfishly, you didnt say anythin about her cheating, but u saw chats, why are u depressed to this point when there isnt any proof of cheating? She is spending so much time at work and still has to come do family again.
Ur probably the reason she will find comfort outside
MeeztaFabulouz:
It is really terrible to feel suicidal all because of marriage. I use use to see different news of how people commit suicide because of relationships and I always felt it was so stupid to think of suicide just because of a fail relationship.

Now I have seen it all clear that depression is really very bad especially when you feel so depressed in a marriage you work so hard and do everything to protect and make your family happy. Its very painful when you know honestly inside your heart that you don't cheat on your wife, provide everything she wants for herself and the kids even when business is quite rough.

She has no conscience and no regard for our union and our home. I am a guy that don't think about looking at wife's phone or suspecting her for anything but then after our first child she changed completely and as of today I don't know were I stand anymore because of my kids. I opened a business for her just so that she won't be like a house wife but she has completely taken the business more important than the family and wake up 4am to start cooking and close 8pm at night. Stressing herself so much but always complaining business is not moving and she is not making any money.

I sponsor everything in the home though am not complaining because that's what a man should do, but she does not have regard for anything or appreciate anything I do. Can you imagine I give her money for feeding weekly even though she is running a food business, she buys few food stuffs in the house which can stay almost two weeks without us eating them because we basically feed from food she cooks in her restaurant. I decided not to bother myself and just give her money to always ensure her business is moving and at least food will not be a problem for us.

One faithful day, I decided to check her phone because I observed a certain strange behavior about her and how she likes to off her phone at night or sometimes when I am around. I saw different chats with some two guys she claimed one was her ex boyfriend that just likes to check on her once in a while, and the other guy was someone I remember like coming to eat in her restaurant but she said they went to school together and he is working with a construction company doing a building project close to her restaurant. She also claimed that when they were in school he was asking her out even till they fished school but she preferred her ex boyfriend to him and when she had issues with her ex that was when I came into her life.

If the story she told me is true or not, I wasn't really bothered anymore because I know its normal for a woman you met at 26 years to have met other guys before you and obviously still has guys that don't respect people's marriage and still do anything to sleep with a married woman. But my paid now is because I feel so respected by many of the things she does and when I think of divorce, I only feel for my kids who will now have to grow up with another man or having to visit their mum and see her with another man.

Recently I have become so depressed that I have been thinking of suicide so that my kids will know their dad is no more rather than knowing that their dad is still alive but can only be with either daddy or mummy and not as a complete family. My depression is getting worse especially when I think about all I have done for her and the kids just to always make them happy but in return, she doest appreciate or even have any regard anymore for what is called "FAMILY"

Over 7 years now and at this point I really feel suicidal. Please I really need help because I make this big mistake.
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by Forumobserver12(m): 10:45am On Dec 08, 2020
MeeztaFabulouz:


You can call me a fool, its fine. But I don't wish you my situation and pray you never meet depression.

Sorry about your condition, I noticed that the fear of your kids growing up in a broken home is reason why you dont want to quite the marriage, but I can tell you that taking your own life is the worst thing you can do for those kids.

Human beings are not predictable, already your wife is showing little or no concern about your family and that includes her own children, so what's the guarantee that she will now change and start caring for the kids when you are no more?

The best you can do is to stay strong for the sake of your kids, or if you think you cannot remedy the situation, seek the help of a professional cancillor...
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by HolyTitus(m): 10:48am On Dec 08, 2020
baralatie:

I will come and expose how you have seriously been mismanaging the communication between the op and his supposed wife.
how he was not able to seize the moment
and
how the op already lost interest in this marriage before the woman even looked outside

I am proving it to you categorically that the op is the 90% contributor to the problems in this relationship
Mtchew... na dem - oversabi people.... you're just seeking for cheap attention
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by Kingpele(m): 10:48am On Dec 08, 2020
[quote author=MeeztaFabulouz post=96829047]

7 years of struggle to cater for and build a decent home, I have spoken so many times and to no avail. Since I was born up till this year, I hit a woman for the first time in my life. The reason is just because she did something stupid, I didn't want to get involved in any argument or fight, I just went to book a hotel room and had a quite time to myself that night till the next morning and on getting home she just attacked me saying I went to sleep with another woman.
I have given her the options so many times to go her way if she is not happy being with me but she won't go. As am writing this, I have not eaten her food since yesterday and I just got home only to see her serving me food and trying to make up but this is not the first time. I practically made her not go to the shop today and I was expecting to see that she went to the shop. When ever we talk, she listens and behave herself for a while but its like there is a spirit that comes into her and when it does, she forgets everything and only tries to bring trouble and more trouble.

Go back to your fathers house, she will not. Ok go and be with any other person that will tolerate your attitude she will not leave my house. All she does is money money money this and that. Even with her business, she does not use a dime for anything in the house aside her own stuffs.
Can you imagine she had a fight with me some time ago because I personally went to pay my kids school myself? All because I didn't give her the money to go and pay herself as I normally do?

Can you also imagine she had a fight with me one day all because I bought a jeans and slippers for myself without buying anything for her and the kids because I had bought some nice stuff for all of them including her like a week before then.

This is a woman that has never bought me even a boxers since marriage and has never gotten me anything gift for my birthday or anything but I just ignore all that and focus on making the family happy. Yet I am not happy in my home because I know what I go through especially this year that corona made things rough, I have passed through hell just to ensure my family is fine and we are not put to shame yet a matured thinking lady does not even care about anything.

Those saying I am a fool for thinking of suicide because of a woman, it is not because of the woman I am thinking of such, if you really know what depression can cause, knowing how hard you struggle to earn your money and spend it on someone who cares less for you, you will understand.[am married too for 9 years now and I really understand what you are going through,it is terrible to be with an ingrate ,no matter what you do or have ,she will always compare you with those that are doing more for their spouse but the truth is that you are financially down now and she knew it,u made a mistake by opening up something for her,since u know she is so selfcentered ,the solution is to hustle more concentrate on taking care of your kids ,stand up to your right as the head of the family,Don't surrender your authority to a woman ,if not when your kids grow up it will be worse,she will turn your kids against you...don't give her money for your kids ,but things for them yourself ,so that they will see u are doing your best as dad ,now pray to God to protect your home and make way for you....Most times the devil uses a little misdemeanor to destroy homes ,pray for your wife and become friends with her again ,talk more with her ...she might come around,Don't divorce your wife God hate it,Don't kill your self cos is a grievous offense against God that gave you life
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by Osanoghodua1: 10:49am On Dec 08, 2020
Don't think of suicide again, you are weak if you take to suicide or even think of it because at the end you will end up in hell fire. You have loss all.

I will suggest you change her business maybe she learn a skill like tailoring or bag making. A business that won't be creating room for her to see male friends comfortably. I suggest you start praying and studying the word God with her, take the matter to God for divine intervention.


See this book Marriage, divorce and remarriage by Kenneth E. Hagin

Talk to your pastor if he is a matured Christian and don't bring this before family, they will destroy the marriage for you. You can't divorce her, she is your wife to hold and to have. God bless you sir .
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by King44(m): 10:49am On Dec 08, 2020
Onlinebar:
It's only in Africa that people see divorce as a taboo......You have to be selfish when it comes to your mental health learn to go your own way
Divorce could lead to things more horrible that one could regret later if not handled wisely.... This happens when children are involved... You won't want to put your children mental health in jeopardy to save yours only or would you?

So it has to be done wisely and as the very last option.
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by AirmirthDY(f): 10:49am On Dec 08, 2020
If you kill yourself, one thousand and one men will marry her...



Your death would be so useless!!
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by jaxxy(m): 10:49am On Dec 08, 2020
MeeztaFabulouz:


7 years of struggle to cater for and build a decent home, I have spoken so many times and to no avail. Since I was born up till this year, I hit a woman for the first time in my life. The reason is just because she did something stupid, I didn't want to get involved in any argument or fight, I just went to book a hotel room and had a quite time to myself that night till the next morning and on getting home she just attacked me saying I went to sleep with another woman.
I have given her the options so many times to go her way if she is not happy being with me but she won't go. As am writing this, I have not eaten her food since yesterday and I just got home only to see her serving me food and trying to make up but this is not the first time. I practically made her not go to the shop today and I was expecting to see that she went to the shop. When ever we talk, she listens and behave herself for a while but its like there is a spirit that comes into her and when it does, she forgets everything and only tries to bring trouble and more trouble.

Go back to your fathers house, she will not. Ok go and be with any other person that will tolerate your attitude she will not leave my house. All she does is money money money this and that. Even with her business, she does not use a dime for anything in the house aside her own stuffs.
Can you imagine she had a fight with me some time ago because I personally went to pay my kids school myself? All because I didn't give her the money to go and pay herself as I normally do?

Can you also imagine she had a fight with me one day all because I bought a jeans and slippers for myself without buying anything for her and the kids because I had bought some nice stuff for all of them including her like a week before then.

This is a woman that has never bought me even a boxers since marriage and has never gotten me anything gift for my birthday or anything but I just ignore all that and focus on making the family happy. Yet I am not happy in my home because I know what I go through especially this year that corona made things rough, I have passed through hell just to ensure my family is fine and we are not put to shame yet a matured thinking lady does not even care about anything.

Those saying I am a fool for thinking of suicide because of a woman, it is not because of the woman I am thinking of such, if you really know what depression can cause, knowing how hard you struggle to earn your money and spend it on someone who cares less for you, you will understand.


Now I understand the dimension to ur problem. U married a very selfish and materialistic person with a attitude problem. It’s a deadly combination for a wife and basically any husbands 2nd worst nightmare.

Yes it can leave u highly depressing being unappreciated and yet still under pressure to give ur everything to make things work and others happy while u are the most unhappy for obvious reasons.

U must sit down and address issues, ur wife is like a baby that needs to be schooled. She is mannersless and spoilt and doesn’t not understand the concept of life and family. Actually she knows bt chooses to forget. She needs to be constantly reminded rather than allowed to have her way or have it easy.

I will take tough decisions to correct a lady like this cos she’s wired and used to doing things a certain way which is completely wrong.
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by saasala(m): 10:50am On Dec 08, 2020
EgunMogaji2:


I can forgive a one night stand maybe due to alcohol or pressure. I can never forgive emotional cheating. That’s who can kill you.

He still didn't mention if his wife was emotionally entangled with any of the guys.
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by cescky(m): 10:50am On Dec 08, 2020
Cmanforall:
Don't invade into your partners private messages if you want your relationship to last.

This is for both parties!

Very foooolish thinking...

As fooolish as the idea of the op committing suicide.. Low esteem people, trash
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by Emeraldgreene(f): 10:50am On Dec 08, 2020
Righteousness89 righteousness wat do one do if the person who is the will of God for you left and married someone else.what fo u do?post=96827699:
You shall Know the truth and the truth will set u Free..

The First truth you should know is that if you kill yourself in any way or Form, you will open your Eyes Live in Hell Fire! And it's forever and Ever.

Secondly, this is the reason I am an advocate that young men and Women seek the Face of God before saying I do. And until you are sure GOD has showed you your Spouse, do not Marry! Marriage is a life time Commitment. Going your way might look sweet at the start but it will always end in Pains!

Thirdly, you Have Married! You Have Married! You are her Husband and she is your wife.
There could be Solutions but you need to approach the originator of the institution of Marriage and take Matters to HIM on the basis of His Mercy.

As you Pray you reach out to Elders you know she could listen to.


For those who are about to Enter, Ensure you Hear Clearly about your Spouse. If you didn't Hear! Pls no matter how juicy its looks, do not Enter!

Do not Marry because of He/she has Cash
Do not Marry because she has Big behind/Big Before or because He has 12 packs
Do not Marry because He/ She is this or that!
Do not Marry for Sympathy or Pity!

The Only Reason to Marry Him/ Her should be Because you Have Sort the Face of GOD and HE has given you the Go ahead!

It is Better to Be Single than to Marry who is not the will of GOD for you!

It will always End in Tears!

They that Have Ears to Hear! Let them Hear!
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by tunjilana: 10:52am On Dec 08, 2020
MeeztaFabulouz:


7 years of struggle to cater for and build a decent home, I have spoken so many times and to no avail. Since I was born up till this year, I hit a woman for the first time in my life. The reason is just because she did something stupid, I didn't want to get involved in any argument or fight, I just went to book a hotel room and had a quite time to myself that night till the next morning and on getting home she just attacked me saying I went to sleep with another woman.
I have given her the options so many times to go her way if she is not happy being with me but she won't go. As am writing this, I have not eaten her food since yesterday and I just got home only to see her serving me food and trying to make up but this is not the first time. I practically made her not go to the shop today and I was expecting to see that she went to the shop. When ever we talk, she listens and behave herself for a while but its like there is a spirit that comes into her and when it does, she forgets everything and only tries to bring trouble and more trouble.

Go back to your fathers house, she will not. Ok go and be with any other person that will tolerate your attitude she will not leave my house. All she does is money money money this and that. Even with her business, she does not use a dime for anything in the house aside her own stuffs.
Can you imagine she had a fight with me some time ago because I personally went to pay my kids school myself? All because I didn't give her the money to go and pay herself as I normally do?

Can you also imagine she had a fight with me one day all because I bought a jeans and slippers for myself without buying anything for her and the kids because I had bought some nice stuff for all of them including her like a week before then.

This is a woman that has never bought me even a boxers since marriage and has never gotten me anything gift for my birthday or anything but I just ignore all that and focus on making the family happy. Yet I am not happy in my home because I know what I go through especially this year that corona made things rough, I have passed through hell just to ensure my family is fine and we are not put to shame yet a matured thinking lady does not even care about anything.

Those saying I am a fool for thinking of suicide because of a woman, it is not because of the woman I am thinking of such, if you really know what depression can cause, knowing how hard you struggle to earn your money and spend it on someone who cares less for you, you will understand.

Focus on 2 things...
1. Your happiness
2. The growth of your kids

That is all you need right now, dont encourage any bad behavior again. Also at the time of setting up the biz, you should have understood her attitude towards money and let that decide if ro give her full control or treat her as an employee of the restaurant which you will own and have oversight upon.
Re: I Feel So Suicidal Because Of My Marriage. by Highhhio(m): 10:52am On Dec 08, 2020
Think about your children and their future,let me tell you what will happened if you kill yourself, your wife will become a complete free woman, you know what I mean.pick a Bible and study it, pray for your wife, and pray forgiveness by thinking of suicide ,atleast lives for your children,is very painful but God have the solution,I pray may God see you through in Jesus name amen.

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