Mcslize:


Cuz I don wise up.

Our mumu don do.

TheCongo2:


Ever since I realized you were not in the US nor Canada, I stop reading your posts on this thread

morgang:
I’ve been in the U.S for a couple of months now and I’ll tell you, if you don’t have a “thick” skin, you’ll be depressed. Forget how much you make! To make it worst, being a student with little or no stipends and tons of academic expectations!

Well, I am an extrovert by nature- so I craved a niche for myself. Every weekend, I go to bars or clubs for a bottle of beer or shots. Sometimes I get lucky to meet folks offering to buy me drinks/shots and interested to know more about my culture- sometimes, I get loads of compliments on my dressings. Girls usually are just a bonus! I talk to some with little or no expectations. Well, I might want to improve my online dating profile and see how lucky I could be.

A friend got two girls who casually asked him out on different occasions! Life here is really complex. Just do your thing and put your happiness first, the rest may come naturally.

In essence, I see this place as a land of hustle, make the best out of it and go back home! You can frequent your visits here for vacations.

morgang:
I’ve been in the U.S for a couple of months now and I’ll tell you, if you don’t have a “thick” skin, you’ll be depressed. Forget how much you make! To make it worst, being a student with little or no stipends and tons of academic expectations!

Well, I am an extrovert by nature- so I craved a niche for myself. Every weekend, I go to bars or clubs for a bottle of beer or shots. Sometimes I get lucky to meet folks offering to buy me drinks/shots and interested to know more about my culture- sometimes, I get loads of compliments on my dressings. Girls usually are just a bonus! I talk to some with little or no expectations. Well, I might want to improve my online dating profile and see how lucky I could be.

A friend got two girls who casually asked him out on different occasions! Life here is really complex. Just do your thing and put your happiness first, the rest may come naturally.

In essence, I see this place as a land of hustle, make the best out of it and go back home! You can frequent your visits here for vacations.

Dybala11:

But you're using the same basis to judge two culturally, socially and economically different societies sir. As much as I believe that there will always be exceptions, but you can't just dismiss the proof of many people experiencing the life you're making assumptions about cos it doesn't fit your hypothesis. I won't reply you again sir, ciao!

neurosci:

The last time I heard a hiss was in Nigeria; I don't even think that exists here. But still, all na fake. I prefer realness to fakeness. I want a genuine smile, not something you just do because it is the norm. At least when you frown at me, I know you hate me and I can avoid you. And when you smile, I know you like me and I can approach you. But these ones that smile whether they like or hate you, how do you deal with such people?

otipoju:



Leave all those guys that think movie is real life.

That face smiling at you can dial 911 in the next ten seconds to report that she does not feel safe because a stranger is staring at her menacingly....while still smiling at you.

Its when your coworkers or classmates organise stuff behind your back that youll realise that you are not one of them.

The neighbours to my right,left and front, we dont know their names...na hello, hi, you good? Na him we dey do.
Nobody wants any problem .

I go to a Nigerian Church, attend Nigerian parties, play football with Nigerians...so im not lonely.

Me I've learnt to mind my business and face my front.
Make God bless me so i can be going back and forth at will.

Na hustle i come hustle for yankee...no be my papa land.

jaxxy:


I think it’s more about mentality and how good u are with adapting quickly to new environments and social systems. Not everyone in Nigeria has the Nigerian mentality some have a more universal mentality and some adapt quite quickly also. Some have not just better people skills bt psychological skills. This coupled with other factors like personality, social intelligence and many social skills makes it easy for some than others even when it’s generally difficult and even unfriendly.

otipoju:


This is deeper than that. You can adapt when people are open minded...but when they are not,its a different story altogether.

Its stereotypes bro. Once you have a foreign looking name or accent, its double work for you. You can be giving brilliant ideas and it will be as if you are speaking to a wall.

Even African kids that were born here face the same thing. And the discrimination is extremely common among african Americans

jaxxy:


I know about the racism which there is little or nothing one can do about it especially in certain parts or environment where it still thrives bt as regards to social culture and patterns things can vary depending on many Factors available.

Cocao:


I was disconcerted by the smiling culture here. I was shopping last week and my cart mistakenly fell on a white girl. I rushed to the front in a flurry of apologies and felt so bad at my clumsiness. This lady was downright smiling at me. I was just apologizing and she kept on saying, it's okay it's not your fault. But I looked into her eyes and saw that she was pissed too (as should be) but the smile was still on her face. Obviously she was torn between choosing to be angry or maintaining her cultural upbringing. Her eyes gave her anger away but she was still smiling.

flokii:
While it looks like blessing to put in all your life savings to acquire Visa, work permit etc. and migrate to obodo oyinbo.. when you get there, the oyinbo people will see you as disturbance and uninvited guest, you won't have friends or people to bond with, loneliness, boredom and feeling of regret would then creep in.
It's only married ones with kids that tend to feel loved, not the singles.

If we had good leaders in Africa in general, who would want to run abroad and live in deep freezer? you sef reason am na.
As a guy, your penls will start to shrink like it's no man's business out of cold and sickness.

79733139:
Mr Man go and sit down. There are guys who went from Nigeria to Germany and joined social clubs (and frequently go to public parks and sporting events) to meet friends and they don't complain about loneliness. Some of these guys put a lot effort in learning German just so that they can have a social life (to mingle with Germans) even though their work (programming) doesn't require them to be fluent in German.

They deliberately and painfully put the effort to deal with loneliness, they didn't sit down and complain on a faceless forum.

If you don't know how to do something you learn it, it might be painful and uncomfortable but it's very doable and the rewards are worth. It is humans beings who live abroad and not alien species, if you share the same interests and you are a cool guy, you would make friends.

For example, if you are in Canada, learn about hockey (in depth) frequently visit a popular sports bar and watch hockey games... you would likely meet "regulars" that could become your friends.

And if you actually like playing sports, go to a place where you can play and you would meet regulars who could eventually become your friends... that's how I made friends with some basketballers even though I am still VERY terrible in playing basketball.

Childofthelord:
I have personally experienced that this before. We had a group assignment( 5 people- My black self and 3 white guys and a white girl) and i reached out to someone in the group about how we would work together. The guy said, we will work individually and only present together. You wouldn't believe they actually created a google doc and planned the whole presentation without me. I can not even describe how that made me feel. I did my part and silently went to the library to weep. And yes they were all smiling as usual

flokii:
While it looks like blessing to put in all your life savings to acquire Visa, work permit etc. and migrate to obodo oyinbo.. when you get there, the oyinbo people will see you as disturbance and uninvited guest, you won't have friends or people to bond with, loneliness, boredom and feeling of regret would then creep in.
It's only married ones with kids that tend to feel loved, not the singles.

If we had good leaders in Africa in general, who would want to run abroad and live in deep freezer? you sef reason am na.
As a guy, your penls will start to shrink like it's no man's business out of cold and sickness.

neurosci:


Before you underestimate what childofthelord is saying here, my question to you is, have you ever lived abroad? I'm sure by the time you ask three girls for their numbers here, white girls specifically since they're the majority, no one will teach you before you stop doing that when you see how much of a nuisance they consider you to be. You think they're the same as Nigerian girls, right? Ok!