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Stop The Blame Game - Romance - Nairaland

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Stop The Blame Game by Kalatium(m): 8:30am On Jun 20, 2021
For years I have heard people blaming love for their relationship or marriage problems.
It is often said that love is blind. Phrases like love na scam, relationship na scam and marriage na scam as become a common mantra among the populace.

However , when observed critically love is not actually the scam we ourselves are the scam.
Just like in Genesis in the garden of eden when God asked Adam why he ate the fruit from the garden Adam blamed Eve, when Eve was asked in turn she blamed The Serpent. We humans always utilize the blame game where we blame every other thing except us for our misfortune.
The major problems we face in marriages or relationships are not actually caused by love but our poor choices and bad behavior.
I have seen where a woman is dating a man who drinks and keeps giving excuses that the man drinks moderately and not a drunkard . Years into marriage this same woman will be complaining that the man is an alcoholic, beats her every day and doesn't provide for the family.
I have seen Men marry women they were cautioned of their bad behavior but they still went ahead to marry them with the fantasy that they will change them. This once happened in my church , a very good brother was planning on marrying a lady and he was warned not to marry her that she parties a lot and has lived a rugged lifestyle but he insisted he can change her.
About a year into the marriage they separated because the Lady was found to have destroyed her womb and was also caught cheating with a neighbour since the husband is not always at home.

When this two event get into the news , many people will say see what marriage has caused , marriage is scam.
We humans are responsible for all the decisions we make. When we make wrong choices we will definitely face the consequences. However, we turn around and blame it on other things.
Love is an emotion that is meant to establish connection between we humans. Without love there will be no bond between we humans. Thus love is not actually the problem but what we do and call it love.
When a relationship or marriage is becoming catastrophic , there is possibility that the man is the terrorist, the woman is a terrorist or both of them are co-terrorist.
We abuse each other emotionally, we manipulate each other, we exploit each other, we do terrible things to each other then we come back and claim victim calling our exes evil.
You will hear a lady say men are scum, the question is what are you doing with scum. If as a lady you keep meeting men who treat you like trash you need to access yourself , for there are high chances of you being responsible for being treated like trash.
I see men saying women do not bring anything to the table. What are you doing with women that don't bring anything to the table . When you keep going for ladies with big backside or those who only care about their beauty what do you expect.
Most of what we pass through are directly or indirectly our fault but we play the victim card and blame others.

We are at fault.

cc
Lalasticlala
seun
farano
Mydd44
Re: Stop The Blame Game by Robertgreene1(m): 8:42am On Jun 20, 2021
it's all about interests bro...nothing like love...
Re: Stop The Blame Game by Kalatium(m): 4:57pm On Dec 18, 2021
Lalasticlala
Re: Stop The Blame Game by Kalatium(m): 4:58pm On Dec 18, 2021
Robertgreene1:
it's all about interests bro...nothing like love...
lol are the real Robert Greene
Re: Stop The Blame Game by Issues40(m): 5:08pm On Dec 18, 2021
Robertgreene1:
it's all about interests bro...nothing like love...

Interest comes first when there's no love. When love leads, interest comes last.
I learnt of a couple who celebrated third 22nd anniversary. And a colleague was filling me in on how they had met. The lady was a prostitute and the man was a poor gentle man. Everyday he'd pass by the brothel going about doing menial jobs. One day he was asked to come fix a leaking pipe at the brothel. The lady offered him sex in exchange for payment but he declined. She continued to press and press him on a daily basis until one day he approached her and spoke to her about her life style. Now that couple just celebrated their 22nd anniversary with 3 kids. That is an example of love leading over selfish interest. They don't have so much. In fact the man still goes about doing menial jobs. The wife trades at a popular market. But together they are building a good home. Poor relationship orientation is the reason why we have it this bad with today's generation. They want it all for themselves. And it doesn't work that way....

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