Crossalpha:
Queen is a 20 yr old girl that is very beautiful and a virgin

Leave this one for the good guys, abeg. You can choose between the other two.

Whatever you do, please leave that 20 year old girl alone. Don't use all your baggage to mess up her young life. She as a virgin will now end up with you that have over used yourself. Please release her.

LadyRosa:


You're correct, reason why I castigated the Janet in my first post and blamed it more on bad upbringing. A lady living with a man without any formal commitment?!? And birthing two sons. Where I come from, those children belongs to my father until the bride price is fully paid.

He must marry her. I'm not obligating him to, after all 'ihe di n' oyi ga na n'oyi'. Wetin dey for relationships with out commitment dey Waka like that...

It's his call.

It's funny how you and others be forming saints on this thread
Is it not the same society we all leave in?
Many teenagers cohabit all the time in relationships.
What is a taboo in my place is killing of innocent unborn children .
I will rather have a mother who will threathen to curse me if I terminate a pregnancy than a mother who have aborted many pregnancies for her daughters.
That many are cool with abortions doesn't mean people who don't do it are poorly brought up, don't you ever cast aspersions on our parents cos they never failed in any of their responsibilities.

Children out of wedlock is not a curse or a result of bad parenting
Many families started this way, I pray every day to have a very tiny logical reason why I should wife Janet.

ImaIma1:
Whatever you do, please leave that 20 year old girl alone. Don't use all your baggage to mess up her young life. She as a virgin will now end up with you that have over used yourself. Please release her.

Oh, really?
Well, she's number 3 and last in my list for a reason.
Someone with cognitive reasoning should see that.

Her inexperience, age, lovey dovey mentality and seeing relationships in real life like in the movies are all turn offs for me.

Op be patient and wait till 50 since you don't Know what you want and which to chose

Crossalpha:

Oh, really?
Well, she's number 3 and last in my list for a reason.
Someone with cognitive reasoning should see that.

Her inexperience, age, lovey dovey mentality and seeing relationships in real life like in the movies are all turn offs for me.

Good.

And I wonder why number 1 is even an option with everything she has done.

ImaIma1:
Whatever you do, please leave that 20 year old girl alone. Don't use all your baggage to mess up her young life. She as a virgin will now end up with you that have over used yourself. Please release her.

Why will such a young girl even be interested in dating a man with 2 kids and 18 years her senior.And her mother sees nothing wrong with it

ImaIma1:


Good.

And I wonder why number 1 is even an option with everything she has done.

She is his baby mama, he has to consider her first lol, two dysfunctional people, if she narrates her own side of the story, I bet hers will be much worse, they fit each other.

The first two are daughters of Jezebel, flee from them. That the first one is the mother of your children doesn't change a thing. She will kill you with pestle and those boys will grow without their father, is that what you want? The last one I wanted to consider but being that she is yet to enter universex-ty, flee from her as well because the premium heartbreak you will suffer later, even satan will weep for you.

JovialJune:



She is his baby mama, he has to consider her first lol, two dysfunctional people, if she narrates her own side of the story, I bet hers will be much worse, they fit each other.

I guess so. His baggage is too much.

At 38yrs, you still don't know what you want from life. If you are here asking question then you are not ready for marriage.

I am on my two knees, please and please don't get married to any of them. You will end up making their life miserable. Continue doing side chick with them.

When you meet someone that's yours, you will physically, emotionally and spiritually know. You won't mind her flaws. Her strengths will only confirm what you know deep within you. There will be no room for doubt.

Ladyhippolyta88:


Why will such a young girl even be interested in dating a man with 2 kids and 18 years her senior.And her mother sees nothing wrong with it

Poverty.

JovialJune:



She is his baby mama, he has to consider her first lol, two dysfunctional people, if she narrates her own side of the story, I bet hers will be much worse, they fit each other.

I've tried to remain civil the best I can on this thread but don't push it. Don't make me believe that you lots deserve the debasing you get in this forum.

ImaIma1:


Good.

And I wonder why number 1 is even an option with everything she has done.

She is an option because she's not married, she's the mother of my kids. Like I said before, if I find a very tiny logical reason to get married to her I will.

luvmijeje:
At 38yrs, you still don't know what you want from life. If you are here asking question then you are not ready for marriage.

I am on my two knees, please and please don't get married to any of them. You will end up making their life miserable. Continue doing side chick with them.

When you meet someone that's yours, you will physically, emotionally and spiritually know. You won't mind her flaws. Her strengths will only confirm what you know deep within you. There will be no room for doubt.

The day a man stops to learn is the day he starts to die. I only brought this hear to seek other people's opinions and I've gotten intelligent responses from many.
You can never know it all in life.

Crossalpha:
I've finally made up my mind to get married.
Please forgive any errors in my post.

I created this account to remain anonymous
I am a man of 38 yrs.
I decided long ago not to ever get married due to very unpleasant experiences I've had with women.
I've had reasons to rethink my decision lately.
I have 3 women/girls am considering for marriage, they all have their strengths and weaknesses.
As I will list below.

1.
Janet: This woman is 39 yrs old, a year older than me. We had a very troublesome relationship that lasted for 17 yrs and produced 2 kids; boys.
This woman have done things to me that few people will ever experience in their lifetime.
She once locked up my mum in the police cell when I was not around.
She brought her boyfriend when she was pregnant and introduced me as her brother.
She has taken me to social welfare office and gave false allegations against me.
She has accused me of trying to use our kids for money rituals.
She has accused me of attempting to rape our house maid which she knows was false.
She has gone round the neighborhood telling anyone that cares to listen that am Hiv positive even when she knows it to be false.
No evil known to man that she has not done to me and my family. I pay all the bills, takes care of her, she's unemployed and very religious.
I still consider her for marriage for the sake of my boys I don't want them to grow up in a broken home. We have been apart for 3 yrs now.
Also, at 39 with 2 boys and loads of trouble it will almost be impossible for her to get married to any man.

2.
Cynthia
She's 26 yrs old and a single mother,(she gave birth at 17 with her 1st boyfriend) I met her after I stopped cohabiting with Janet and got a new apartment. She's what many will call a high class lady, she clubs,she dresses to kill, she drinks and we smoke together, she's the one that even taught me how to roll properly
Despite all these, she has a very good character and personality better than most girls who doesn't do what she does.I've met quite a few.
She doesn't hide who she is.
She's a very good cook, she cleans and she's very neat.

This lady is also special cos I've come to understand that things fall into place whenever she's around me, I've never lost any business opportunity or favour whenever she's with me. Whenever I tell her of challenges am facing, she will tell me that as long as she's with me that I will never fail to achieve whatever I want and this have always been the case. 3 times I brokeup with her just to test if she being around me have anything to do with the good fortune or if it's a mere coincidence. Things started crumbling around me. Clients no longer takes my calls, some of my contracts were terminated for no good reasons, clients will refuse to pay me for no reason.
Everything will come back to normal immediately we reconciled.(this mystery about her is beyond logic)
I am considering her for marriage for her personality, the good fortune she brings to my life and business.

3.
Queen

Queen is a 20 yr old girl that is very beautiful and a virgin.
She loves me so much.
she even told her mum about me.
She's yet to gain admission into the university. Her parents have agreed that we should go ahead with marriage on the condition that she will graduate before coming to stay with me as wife.
Her mum is optimistic that we will make a good couple, she told me to come with my people cos other suitors are coming for her daughter' s hand in marriage and she will prefer her daughter marries me.
Somehow, I am not comfortable with her cos of our age difference; I am 18 yrs older than her. Girls of her age are known to change or become promiscuous when they get into the university.
I am considering her for marriage because of her beauty, her love for me,her smartness her parents support to the our union.

There you have it guys, which of these women/girls do you think I should get married to?

Cynthia looks like a good option

realtalk19:


Cynthia looks like a good option

Thanks.

Crossalpha:

The day a man stops to learn is the day he starts to die. I only brought this hear to seek other people's opinions and I've gotten intelligent responses from many.
You can never know it all in life.

Okay o. But you can't learn who to get married to. My choice can never be your choice. And most importantly those advising you will not live with the woman they are advising you to choose.

Marriage is a personal decision.

Crossalpha:


It's funny how you and others be forming saints on this thread
Is it not the same society we all leave in?
Many teenagers cohabit all the time in relationships.
What is a taboo in my place is killing of innocent unborn children .
I will rather have a mother who will threathen to curse me if I terminate a pregnancy than a mother who have aborted many pregnancies for her daughters.
That many are cool with abortions doesn't mean people who don't do it are poorly brought up, don't you ever cast aspersions on our parents cos they never failed in any of their responsibilities.

Children out of wedlock is not a curse or a result of bad parenting
Many families started this way, I pray every day to have a very tiny logical reason why I should wife Janet.

Bad parenting is a factor as well as peer groups as well. I'm not casting aspersions, I'm totally against having children out of wedlock, it's so alien to me. I'm not a righteous person and abortion still remains a sin no matter what! My only focus is on having kids raised by single parents who ought to put heads together to create a complete nuclear home.

Still, it's your call. She made her bed, so she must lie on it.

Lesson to ladies who pride themselves in living married when actually single.

Crossalpha:

I've tried to remain civil the best I can on this thread but don't push it. Don't make me believe that you lots deserve the debasing you get in this forum.

Believe na, who cares, what is the difference between you and the dings here who say all sort of rubbish about women, you made a lady a baby mama, after living with you for 17years, you had the temerity to name her as an option, painting her in bad light to be seen as a terrible person, imagine saying all hell let loose when your mum and aunt got involved in the little disagreement, I'm pretty sure your mum and aunt beat her blue black, that's why she pressed charges and jail your mum, but you choose not tell us that one, nonsense, you kept someone for 17 years without putting a ring on it and expect her to be all nice and floffy, na she be the mumu wey stay with you all this years na,

I said what I said and I will say more if need be, you can go off yourself if you dont like it, rubbish.

JovialJune:



Believe na, who cares, what is the difference between you and the dings here who say all sort of rubbish about women, you made a lady a baby mama, after living with you for 17years, you had the temerity to name her as an option, painting her in bad light to be seen as a terrible person, imagine saying all hell let loose when your mum and aunt got involved in the little disagreement, I'm pretty sure your mum and aunt beat her blue black, that's why she pressed charges and jail your mum, but you choose not tell us that one, nonsense, you kept someone for 17 years without putting a ring on it and expect her to be all nice and floffy, na she be the mumu wey stay with you all this years na,

I said what I said and I will say more if need be, you can go off yourself if you dont like it, rubbish.

Seen, can you now direct your frustrations and emotions to the appropriate quarters.

Crossalpha:


Seen, can you now direct your frustrations and emotions to the appropriate quarters.

Nsidime

Crossalpha:


It's funny how you and others be forming saints on this thread

Oga stop trying to make yourself feel good. We don't have to be saints to point out that your lifestyle is very unpalatable.

Is it not the same society we all leave in?
Many teenagers cohabit all the time in relationships.

I hope you know teenage is 13-19? Since when??

JovialJune:



Believe na, who cares, what is the difference between you and the dings here who say all sort of rubbish about women, you made a lady a baby mama, after living with you for 17years, you had the temerity to name her as an option, painting her in bad light to be seen as a terrible person, imagine saying all hell let loose when your mum and aunt got involved in the little disagreement, I'm pretty sure your mum and aunt beat her blue black, that's why she pressed charges and jail your mum, but you choose not tell us that one, nonsense, you kept someone for 17 years without putting a ring on it and expect her to be all nice and floffy, na she be the mumu wey stay with you all this years na,

I said what I said and I will say more if need be, you can go off yourself if you dont like it, rubbish.

Aunty calm down and for once try not to bring ur feminism bullshit here, someone who can jail another woman that has given birth to a son who is up to 38yrs ain't worthy of getting affection from any body
I blame the op for one reason,how did he manage to birth kids with that woman even after seeing all these things
Well, what is done is done but my advice for the op is that he should never get married to anyone out of pity,cos even if the marriage ends up being Rosy,once in a while,regrets will definitely set in and he won't be able to progress much in life
I hope all the Nairaland Playboys and redpillers learn something from ops story,imagine if the op channeled his energy into looking for someone who matches him rather than searching for sex,it would have been alot easier making marriage decisions,but look at the options he conjured up there,none of the ladies are worthy of being getting married to
Janet is a fucking single mother and when the time comes for her to choose between her child and the op, trust me her child will always come first
Queen is fucking 20yrs old,even if they successfully get married, with time she will control the op cause his strength will be long gone when she start getting hers and damn,it won't be easy on the op when that time comes
In conclusion op,u have made a mistake that cannot be corrected and I got no advise to give you

[s]

Slimdan360:

Aunty calm down and for once try not to bring ur feminism bullshit here, someone who can jail another woman that has given birth to a son who is up to 38yrs ain't worthy of getting affection from any body
I blame the op for one reason,how did he manage to birth kids with that woman even after seeing all these things
Well, what is done is done but my advice for the op is that he should never get married to anyone out of pity,cos even if the marriage ends up being Rosy,once in a while,regrets will definitely set in and he won't be able to progress much in life
I hope all the Nairaland Playboys and redpillers learn something from ops story,imagine if the op channeled his energy into looking for someone who matches him rather than searching for sex,it would have been alot easier making marriage decisions,but look at the options he conjured up there,none of the ladies are worthy of being getting married to
Janet is a fucking single mother and when the time comes for her to choose between her child and the op, trust me her child will always come first
Queen is fucking 20yrs old,even if they successfully get married, with time she will control the op cause his strength will be long gone when she start getting hers and damn,it won't be easy on the op when that time comes
In conclusion op,u have made a mistake that cannot be corrected and I got no advise to give you

[/s]


In a rush to quote me and as usual, yapp about a movement that has nothing to do with your life's problem, you did not see where I also castigated the lady, instead, mentioning feminism makes your existence okay and comment sensible abi? Las las you no get any drop of sense, don't ever quote me again if you have nothing sensible to spill, do you understand?

Ishilove:

Oga stop trying to make yourself feel good. We don't have to be saints to point out that your lifestyle is very unpalatable.


I hope you know teenage is 13-19? Since when??

I definitely don't need anyone's approval to " to feel good" about myself. I have done really well for myself in life. 1 or 2 mistakes or missteps is not enough to make me feel bad about myself.
Life happened to me just like anyone else,we all have our unique stories to tell.
Before you judge someone you must have walked in the person's shoes which is not possible.

As for cohibitation, I went to school in this country and I know how students will become couples in school while they are single at home, I know how teenage girls will travel from their school state to another state to live with a man for weeks even months, should I talk about what happens in PPA's during NYSC?
He/she that is without blame should cast the first stone.

BTW, the purpose of this thread is not to debate morality status.
Thanks

JovialJune:
[s][/s]


In a rush to quote me and as usual, yapp about a movement that has nothing to do with your life's problem, you did not see where I also castigated the lady, instead, mentioning feminism makes your existence okay and comment sensible abi? Las las you no get any drop of sense, don't ever quote me again if you have nothing sensible to spill, do you understand?

What's causing your frustration ma'am?