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Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. - Family (6) - Nairaland

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Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by descarado: 5:24pm On Nov 14, 2021
Oblongata:
If you married from South west, you have absolutely nothing to worry about! That is the way it is done culturally. The bride's family is supposed to foot the bill, and you are expected to take care of the traditional stuffs. That's the way of the Yorubas. Happy married life bro!
The problem isn't about culture or were it's done.
That's how it's done everywhere.
The problem is why he was cast aside in his own wedding?

Even if you want to sponsor my wedding with 10m, shouldn't I join in the planning?

Well, goodluck to you guys if it's how prospective inlaws are looked down on.
Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by Btruth: 5:25pm On Nov 14, 2021
I will do more for my daughter, if you are my son-in-law. Stop reading meaning into it. Both of you are his children, and as such he can spend to any level.

Happy married life.

2 Likes

Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by slimmoney(m): 5:26pm On Nov 14, 2021
only few yoruba understand this
Oblongata:
If you married from South west, you have absolutely nothing to worry about! That is the way it is done culturally. The bride's family is supposed to foot the bill, and you are expected to take care of the traditional stuffs. That's the way of the Yorubas. Happy married life bro!

1 Like

Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by Druss(m): 5:27pm On Nov 14, 2021
Not enough information in your post

By your group's culture, who pays for wedding?
By your girl's culture, who pays for wedding?

In your culture, is it frowned on for one party to support the other?

Are your own people getting upset and putting aggressive notions in your head?

EDIT; Just seen that you married a Yoruba girl. There is nothing to worry about. Go and find something else to disturb your mind. It is only if your people are troubling you. At the very least be happy that you won't have in-laws headache in future as regards financial support. In order for you to not be treated as economic outpatient sha, you will need to demonstrate that you are taking care of their daughter. Daddies don't like seeing their princesses suffer. A word is enough for the wise.

1 Like

Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by Oblongata: 5:28pm On Nov 14, 2021
descarado:

The problem isn't about culture or were it's done.
That's how it's done everywhere.
The problem is why he was cast aside in his own wedding?

Even if you want to sponsor my wedding with 10m, shouldn't I join in the planning?

Well, goodluck to you guys if it's how prospective inlaws are looked down on.


The Yorubas wedding is different, he wasn't casted aside, it's just that the Yorubas believe the bride are the ones to do the party and then let the groom know where to come in. It's the Yoruba way

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by litaninja(m): 5:30pm On Nov 14, 2021
Yoruba lady?

Tonero5200:
Hi.

Honestly speaking am really worried, have dated my fiance for sometime now. So we finally decided to tie the knot.
She suggested we do it this year November and I concurred, so we've been saving towards it ever since.

Last 2 months I made my intentions known to her family, that I will like to marry their daughter. Due to the conversations I had With her parents, I told them I wanted it small.. because am not financialy buoyant.

But To my surprise, her dad said I shouldn't worry about it, they are going to support me ( which is most likely Normal)

(They gave me traditional rite's, which I sorted out by myself)

With the traditional right drawing close, last month I learnt from my fiancee..her parents are planning to buy 2 cow for the traditional and white wedding. (I was surprised)

The following week, the hall she choosed for the reception of the white wedding, has already been paid for by her dad which was about 500k excluding the decorations which they also took care of ( even though I opted we could have done the reception in the church)

But my fiancee told me her dad is inviting alot of well-wishers home and abroad to come celebrate with us.both his fellow staffs and all.

* I bought 2 bag of rice and groundnut oils

* We paid for the cakes

* We paid for drinks

* We sorted things out (invitation cards, pre shoot photos)

But was surprised 2 days to the traditional marriage, more expensive drinks were rolling in.

On the d day of the white wedding, I realised, they cooked more than 8 bags of rice ( coconut, jollof, banga and fried) meats were surplused.
Alot of people came from her family's, while my own families were just there.. they did get the message.

Someone even said it to my mom face. THAT THIS GIRL PAPA TRY O.

please, I don't want to sound like am a bad person or I don't know good.
Offcus I appreciate her parents efforts, but am just a little bit worried.

As a man, won't this come to haunt me in the future?
Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by Bamzyriches451: 5:31pm On Nov 14, 2021
Now wey God don bless you with helper, you still Dey complain.

1 Like

Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by MrNipplesLover(m): 5:32pm On Nov 14, 2021
Beware of the FUTURE.

What's the FUTURE?

The FUTURE is...... smiley




Stay blessed, OP.
Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by ayenale1(m): 5:33pm On Nov 14, 2021
Your first disagreement or quarrel will determine maybe to be worried or not...pls be man enough to post her insults here again but for now enjoy ur marriage
Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by streetsoldier1(m): 5:34pm On Nov 14, 2021
Tonero5200:
Hi.

Honestly speaking am really worried, have dated my fiance for sometime now. So we finally decided to tie the knot.
She suggested we do it this year November and I concurred, so we've been saving towards it ever since.

Last 2 months I made my intentions known to her family, that I will like to marry their daughter. Due to the conversations I had With her parents, I told them I wanted it small.. because am not financialy buoyant.

But To my surprise, her dad said I shouldn't worry about it, they are going to support me ( which is most likely Normal)

(They gave me traditional rite's, which I sorted out by myself)

With the traditional right drawing close, last month I learnt from my fiancee..her parents are planning to buy 2 cow for the traditional and white wedding. (I was surprised)

The following week, the hall she choosed for the reception of the white wedding, has already been paid for by her dad which was about 500k excluding the decorations which they also took care of ( even though I opted we could have done the reception in the church)

But my fiancee told me her dad is inviting alot of well-wishers home and abroad to come celebrate with us.both his fellow staffs and all.

* I bought 2 bag of rice and groundnut oils

* We paid for the cakes

* We paid for drinks

* We sorted things out (invitation cards, pre shoot photos)

But was surprised 2 days to the traditional marriage, more expensive drinks were rolling in.

On the d day of the white wedding, I realised, they cooked more than 8 bags of rice ( coconut, jollof, banga and fried) meats were surplused.
Alot of people came from her family's, while my own families were just there.. they did get the message.

Someone even said it to my mom face. THAT THIS GIRL PAPA TRY O.

please, I don't want to sound like am a bad person or I don't know good.
Offcus I appreciate her parents efforts, but am just a little bit worried.

As a man, won't this come to haunt me in the future?

If ur wife na yoruba/edo/itshekiri/urhobo, you dont have to be worried, na their way, they believed wife's family should be responsible for wedding

2 Likes

Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by Druss(m): 5:34pm On Nov 14, 2021
descarado:

The problem isn't about culture or were it's done.
That's how it's done everywhere.
The problem is why he was cast aside in his own wedding?

Even if you want to sponsor my wedding with 10m, shouldn't I join in the planning?

Well, goodluck to you guys if it's how prospective inlaws are looked down on.


Una don forget say na their wedding - your only job is to be present. The wedding is an opportunity in South West for the parents to demonstrate their capability.

OP should have no worries. In fact he should go buy small gift for the in-laws to greet them.

3 Likes

Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by Sketch007(m): 5:36pm On Nov 14, 2021
I beg to differ!. She honestly has a point and as such your understanding of her comment isn't in the right context. That she doesn't like the manner of the overboard gesture doesn't mean there won't be an atom of assistance from her folks. All she clamoured for, was that even if they want to, she and her man would do most of the planning and if it requires for it to be low ceremony to protary her man in a better way before her folks, then she'd do just that keeping her man's respect. The manner of presenting your prospective spouse to one's folks matters alot in marriage.
CryptoClub2018:


It's because of people like you that makes rich people don't want their children to marry someone from a low standard life. Low self esteem and pride at the same time. It's not the wedding that will determine if they will respect you or not. For them to have allowed you marry there daughter,it shows they value you and respect you already. There are other things that you will do that will make them disrespect you and definitely not this
Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by baby124: 5:37pm On Nov 14, 2021
Midas01:
But it's this same Nairaland that all of you fools call all Nigerian girls broke and after your money. Now that you've seen one with rich parents that you cannot match your ego has come out to play.

I've said it that Nigerian guys are scared of wealthy girls most especially if she's from a wealthy family.

Now let me tell you why you're scared, you're scared because you know if you do anyhow you'll see anyhow.
That’s the message Yoruba parents send to their prospective in-laws. They are capable of making you see anyhow if you mistreat their daughter. It’s subtle but this guy knows. Maybe he’s emotionally unstable.

4 Likes

Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by BABANGBALI: 5:39pm On Nov 14, 2021
You should be more than worried. You’re not man enough to be married
Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by ayandee: 5:41pm On Nov 14, 2021
Tonero5200:
Hi.

Honestly speaking am really worried, have dated my fiance for sometime now. So we finally decided to tie the knot.
She suggested we do it this year November and I concurred, so we've been saving towards it ever since.

Last 2 months I made my intentions known to her family, that I will like to marry their daughter. Due to the conversations I had With her parents, I told them I wanted it small.. because am not financialy buoyant.

But To my surprise, her dad said I shouldn't worry about it, they are going to support me ( which is most likely Normal)

(They gave me traditional rite's, which I sorted out by myself)

With the traditional right drawing close, last month I learnt from my fiancee..her parents are planning to buy 2 cow for the traditional and white wedding. (I was surprised)

The following week, the hall she choosed for the reception of the white wedding, has already been paid for by her dad which was about 500k excluding the decorations which they also took care of ( even though I opted we could have done the reception in the church)

But my fiancee told me her dad is inviting alot of well-wishers home and abroad to come celebrate with us.both his fellow staffs and all.

* I bought 2 bag of rice and groundnut oils

* We paid for the cakes

* We paid for drinks

* We sorted things out (invitation cards, pre shoot photos)

But was surprised 2 days to the traditional marriage, more expensive drinks were rolling in.

On the d day of the white wedding, I realised, they cooked more than 8 bags of rice ( coconut, jollof, banga and fried) meats were surplused.
Alot of people came from her family's, while my own families were just there.. they did get the message.

Someone even said it to my mom face. THAT THIS GIRL PAPA TRY O.

please, I don't want to sound like am a bad person or I don't know good.
Offcus I appreciate her parents efforts, but am just a little bit worried.

As a man, won't this come to haunt me in the future?
that's how we roll here in the west. Weddings arent just about the couple. I would do the same for my daughter without thinking twice

1 Like

Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by baby124: 5:42pm On Nov 14, 2021
Not all Yoruba brides families pay all expenses for the wedding. Those expecting such may be disgraced o. Maybe the wealthy ones. All they will be responsible for is the traditional/reception if they are capable. If you do white and other additional weddings, you are on your own.

4 Likes

Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by BABANGBALI: 5:42pm On Nov 14, 2021
Midas01:
But it's this same Nairaland that all of you fools call all Nigerian girls broke and after your money. Now that you've seen one with rich parents that you cannot match your ego has come out to play.

I've said it that Nigerian guys are scared of wealthy girls most especially if she's from a wealthy family.

Now let me tell you why you're scared, you're scared because you know if you do anyhow you'll see anyhow.

Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by 234GT(m): 5:42pm On Nov 14, 2021
shantti:



What if the OP is correct as regards his fears, what if his in-law starts to rub it to his face that he sponsored his wedding, you know that in this life nothing goes for nothing, it's a kind of give and take. Like "since I sponsored your wedding, I will now have to the taking the important decisions in your family. My consent is needed before you can do anything". Let's just pray the father in law is reasonable.


They cant rub it in his face. They simply did their responsibility. That's Yoruba for you. Only poor families tax the groom.

4 Likes

Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by Innobee99(m): 5:43pm On Nov 14, 2021
Tonero5200:
Hi.

Honestly speaking am really worried, have dated my fiance for sometime now. So we finally decided to tie the knot.
She suggested we do it this year November and I concurred, so we've been saving towards it ever since.

Last 2 months I made my intentions known to her family, that I will like to marry their daughter. Due to the conversations I had With her parents, I told them I wanted it small.. because am not financialy buoyant.

But To my surprise, her dad said I shouldn't worry about it, they are going to support me ( which is most likely Normal)

(They gave me traditional rite's, which I sorted out by myself)

With the traditional right drawing close, last month I learnt from my fiancee..her parents are planning to buy 2 cow for the traditional and white wedding. (I was surprised)

The following week, the hall she choosed for the reception of the white wedding, has already been paid for by her dad which was about 500k excluding the decorations which they also took care of ( even though I opted we could have done the reception in the church)

But my fiancee told me her dad is inviting alot of well-wishers home and abroad to come celebrate with us.both his fellow staffs and all.

* I bought 2 bag of rice and groundnut oils

* We paid for the cakes

* We paid for drinks

* We sorted things out (invitation cards, pre shoot photos)

But was surprised 2 days to the traditional marriage, more expensive drinks were rolling in.

On the d day of the white wedding, I realised, they cooked more than 8 bags of rice ( coconut, jollof, banga and fried) meats were surplused.
Alot of people came from her family's, while my own families were just there.. they did get the message.

Someone even said it to my mom face. THAT THIS GIRL PAPA TRY O.

please, I don't want to sound like am a bad person or I don't know good.
Offcus I appreciate her parents efforts, but am just a little bit worried.

As a man, won't this come to haunt me in the future?
A new Toyota Venza awaits you and your wife on the wedding day from her dad





That I have also seen
Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by galaxy2020(m): 5:43pm On Nov 14, 2021
Tonero5200:


The money her dad spent was really much .
I can't even make a correct calculations.

That's what's getting me worried, so that it won't lead to another thing.
...you are expected to always love your wife always, no matter what. I hope she's God fearing and got a good character and respects you sincerely. If yes, you've got nothing to fear.

1 Like

Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by descarado: 5:45pm On Nov 14, 2021
.
Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by Imperium1: 5:46pm On Nov 14, 2021
Tonero5200:
Hi.

Honestly speaking am really worried, have dated my fiance for sometime now. So we finally decided to tie the knot.
She suggested we do it this year November and I concurred, so we've been saving towards it ever since.

Last 2 months I made my intentions known to her family, that I will like to marry their daughter. Due to the conversations I had With her parents, I told them I wanted it small.. because am not financialy buoyant.

But To my surprise, her dad said I shouldn't worry about it, they are going to support me ( which is most likely Normal)

(They gave me traditional rite's, which I sorted out by myself)

With the traditional right drawing close, last month I learnt from my fiancee..her parents are planning to buy 2 cow for the traditional and white wedding. (I was surprised)

The following week, the hall she choosed for the reception of the white wedding, has already been paid for by her dad which was about 500k excluding the decorations which they also took care of ( even though I opted we could have done the reception in the church)

But my fiancee told me her dad is inviting alot of well-wishers home and abroad to come celebrate with us.both his fellow staffs and all.

* I bought 2 bag of rice and groundnut oils

* We paid for the cakes

* We paid for drinks

* We sorted things out (invitation cards, pre shoot photos)

But was surprised 2 days to the traditional marriage, more expensive drinks were rolling in.

On the d day of the white wedding, I realised, they cooked more than 8 bags of rice ( coconut, jollof, banga and fried) meats were surplused.
Alot of people came from her family's, while my own families were just there.. they did get the message.

Someone even said it to my mom face. THAT THIS GIRL PAPA TRY O.

please, I don't want to sound like am a bad person or I don't know good.
Offcus I appreciate her parents efforts, but am just a little bit worried.

As a man, won't this come to haunt me in the future?

You don't look a gift horse in the mouth.
Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by creepsyme(f): 5:50pm On Nov 14, 2021
Tonero5200:
Hi.

Honestly speaking am really worried, have dated my fiance for sometime now. So we finally decided to tie the knot.
She suggested we do it this year November and I concurred, so we've been saving towards it ever since.

Last 2 months I made my intentions known to her family, that I will like to marry their daughter. Due to the conversations I had With her parents, I told them I wanted it small.. because am not financialy buoyant.

But To my surprise, her dad said I shouldn't worry about it, they are going to support me ( which is most likely Normal)

(They gave me traditional rite's, which I sorted out by myself)

With the traditional right drawing close, last month I learnt from my fiancee..her parents are planning to buy 2 cow for the traditional and white wedding. (I was surprised)

The following week, the hall she choosed for the reception of the white wedding, has already been paid for by her dad which was about 500k excluding the decorations which they also took care of ( even though I opted we could have done the reception in the church)

But my fiancee told me her dad is inviting alot of well-wishers home and abroad to come celebrate with us.both his fellow staffs and all.

* I bought 2 bag of rice and groundnut oils

* We paid for the cakes

* We paid for drinks

* We sorted things out (invitation cards, pre shoot photos)

But was surprised 2 days to the traditional marriage, more expensive drinks were rolling in.

On the d day of the white wedding, I realised, they cooked more than 8 bags of rice ( coconut, jollof, banga and fried) meats were surplused.
Alot of people came from her family's, while my own families were just there.. they did get the message.

Someone even said it to my mom face. THAT THIS GIRL PAPA TRY O.

please, I don't want to sound like am a bad person or I don't know good.
Offcus I appreciate her parents efforts, but am just a little bit worried.

As a man, won't this come to haunt me in the future?
Well, good thing you are worried!
Get ready to run your family with your father in-law.
Get ready to be on your toes always.
Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by Goldiness: 5:51pm On Nov 14, 2021
Instead of you to be happy and thankful to God for such help that others are looking for you want to do ego man, see the only advice I have for you is to respect your in-laws and be good to their daughter, don't do things that will put you on any wrong spot light in the marriage,be a man of yourself. If they don't love you they will not render such kindness to you at all and all I see is that every body contributed to the wedding which is normal,you to did your best contribution,so don't feel treathened by their own contribution alright. Happy married life. Enjoy your home

1 Like

Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by osazsky(m): 5:51pm On Nov 14, 2021
Tonero5200:
Hi.

Honestly speaking am really worried, have dated my fiance for sometime now. So we finally decided to tie the knot.
She suggested we do it this year November and I concurred, so we've been saving towards it ever since.

Last 2 months I made my intentions known to her family, that I will like to marry their daughter. Due to the conversations I had With her parents, I told them I wanted it small.. because am not financialy buoyant.

But To my surprise, her dad said I shouldn't worry about it, they are going to support me ( which is most likely Normal)

(They gave me traditional rite's, which I sorted out by myself)

With the traditional right drawing close, last month I learnt from my fiancee..her parents are planning to buy 2 cow for the traditional and white wedding. (I was surprised)

The following week, the hall she choosed for the reception of the white wedding, has already been paid for by her dad which was about 500k excluding the decorations which they also took care of ( even though I opted we could have done the reception in the church)

But my fiancee told me her dad is inviting alot of well-wishers home and abroad to come celebrate with us.both his fellow staffs and all.

* I bought 2 bag of rice and groundnut oils

* We paid for the cakes

* We paid for drinks

* We sorted things out (invitation cards, pre shoot photos)

But was surprised 2 days to the traditional marriage, more expensive drinks were rolling in.

On the d day of the white wedding, I realised, they cooked more than 8 bags of rice ( coconut, jollof, banga and fried) meats were surplused.
Alot of people came from her family's, while my own families were just there.. they did get the message.

Someone even said it to my mom face. THAT THIS GIRL PAPA TRY O.

please, I don't want to sound like am a bad person or I don't know good.
Offcus I appreciate her parents efforts, but am just a little bit worried.

As a man, won't this come to haunt me in the future?
if them support una una go complain if them give una list from imo una go still complain.u can nerver satisfy a black man they are neither here nor there

4 Likes

Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by shantti(m): 5:51pm On Nov 14, 2021
234GT:



They cant rub it in his face. They simply did their responsibility. That's Yoruba for you. Only poor families tax the groom.

Ok
Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by Qatar2022: 5:52pm On Nov 14, 2021
madridguy:
My brother, if God send you helper person no dey show muscle again.
You're lucky to have a supportive in-law.

Happy married life.
It's obvious that you can't differentiate insult from help , you be big mumu

1 Like

Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by osazsky(m): 5:55pm On Nov 14, 2021
Qatar2022:

It's obvious that you can't differentiate insult from help , you be big mumu
but if the parents commot hand begin give the guy imo list we saw 2 days ago that was 1.5m una go still complain. He even get luck say him see support unlike us

2 Likes

Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by Endtime123: 5:59pm On Nov 14, 2021
Bro it's too much o! if your in-laws use those money to finance your career and later when you are finacially okay, you can do the wedding again and eleborate it the way you want it. Just saying o...
Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by Bluntemperor: 6:00pm On Nov 14, 2021
madridguy:
My brother, if God send you helper person no dey show muscle again.
You're lucky to have a supportive in-law.

Happy married life.

Why are you afraid,bro?
Is it because her parents sponsored it,I do understand your fear but in Yoruba land, Parents of a good child are always proud of their girl going for a marriage! They treat is a a honorable thing and as God commanded!
By the way,why come to a Public Forum to discuss this new Marriage?
Be good to your wife, enjoy the union.
Happy Married Life once again

1 Like

Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by Elvisod: 6:01pm On Nov 14, 2021

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U-qMCMDLFbs

Don't miss out on....
*LIKE AND SUBSCRIBE
Re: Her Parents Sponsored Our Wedding, Should I Be Worried. by coldcandy: 6:01pm On Nov 14, 2021
Iyaebe:
Abegiii,I as a person will strongly refuse that,I don't want anything that will bring my man out and be perceived as a low value man. What happens to a very low key wedding where he won't be needing any assistance from anybody and his respect intact.

Poor man/woman's mentality

3 Likes

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