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I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband - Family (9) - Nairaland

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Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by fitinwell: 11:51am On Nov 25, 2021
hashbag1:
Nlanders,
I have been married for 9 years now, amidst several incidences that gave me suspicions over my wife's infidelity. The one that happened of recent gave me nothing more than great suspicion over any other.

My daughter and son got infection, they were admitted into the hospital. On this faithful day, I was there with them and I left the hospital in the afternoon to get something for them to eat, I got back with the food and quickly rushed down to my office to tidy some work. I felt hungry and decided to drive out, on my way to the restaurant leads to the hospital, I was in traffic when I put a call through to my wife whom I asked how she was coping and how the kids were doing, while on call with her, I heard sounds of car horns so I asked if she was out, she said yes that she was going to get water across the stree, so i was like you shouldnt have stressed yourself since
the house maid was with her, next thing she yelled at me saying why am I making ascertion as to who should go get the water or not, I was like but that isnt a big deal to ask, she was like well the house girl have been the one running errands all day, I responded saying instead of yelling at me, you would have just responded by saying the above.

As a responsible and concerned father, I decided to suspend dinner and branch at the hospital which took me 8 mins to get there because of traffic. On getting to the hospital, lo and behold, my wife was not there, just the kids and the house maid. I asked the house maid where madam was, she said she stepped out without saying where she was going. I immediately put a call through to her. "Babes where are you at, just got here now and you are not here". She immediately hung up on me, I called back, she didnt pick, called her again didn't pick, waited few mins and called, she picked and yelled "why are you looking for me" I was like but you claimed you went to
go get water but its been up to 15mins and you are not here yet, next thing she said was I'm in a uber car, Wow uber car when you just said you went across the street to get water, how does being in uber car relate to that. I requested a video call, I hung up the normal call and called her on whatsapp call, she didn't pick, I called her back again on normal call and said you aren't picking, she responded saying am in uber car now, call me on video again, I did but she still didnt pick. So I decided not to bother since declaring her whereabout seems frutile. She called back on normal call saying she was on her way home to pick some her items to quickly do an advertising shoot to model to her customers in the hospital room, that she didnt want me to get mad at her reason why she didn't tell me before she left, I was like its not a big deal telling me that after which I have found out she never did go out there to buy water.

Husbands and fathers in the house, in this kind of situation, what could have been your thought? As for me, something was not just right, and the most damning part of all these is leaving the kids at the mercy of just the house maid, I feel if there is something she is hiding from me and leaving the kids like that is what
the issue of trust has led us to, I am left in amazement and total disappointment.

For 9yrs Relationship... Your Wife directly proportional to who you are...

You are the Mirror she replicates..

So if you are suspecting her of cheating..
The Check yourself not her!

I take a Bow

1 Like

Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by Nobody: 11:51am On Nov 25, 2021
hashbag1:
Nlanders,
I have been married for 9 years now, amidst several incidences that gave me suspicions over my wife's infidelity. The one that happened of recent gave me nothing more than great suspicion over any other.

My daughter and son got infection, they were admitted into the hospital. On this faithful day, I was there with them and I left the hospital in the afternoon to get something for them to eat, I got back with the food and quickly rushed down to my office to tidy some work. I felt hungry and decided to drive out, on my way to the restaurant leads to the hospital, I was in traffic when I put a call through to my wife whom I asked how she was coping and how the kids were doing, while on call with her, I heard sounds of car horns so I asked if she was out, she said yes that she was going to get water across the stree, so i was like you shouldnt have stressed yourself since
the house maid was with her, next thing she yelled at me saying why am I making ascertion as to who should go get the water or not, I was like but that isnt a big deal to ask, she was like well the house girl have been the one running errands all day, I responded saying instead of yelling at me, you would have just responded by saying the above.

As a responsible and concerned father, I decided to suspend dinner and branch at the hospital which took me 8 mins to get there because of traffic. On getting to the hospital, lo and behold, my wife was not there, just the kids and the house maid. I asked the house maid where madam was, she said she stepped out without saying where she was going. I immediately put a call through to her. "Babes where are you at, just got here now and you are not here". She immediately hung up on me, I called back, she didnt pick, called her again didn't pick, waited few mins and called, she picked and yelled "why are you looking for me" I was like but you claimed you went to
go get water but its been up to 15mins and you are not here yet, next thing she said was I'm in a uber car, Wow uber car when you just said you went across the street to get water, how does being in uber car relate to that. I requested a video call, I hung up the normal call and called her on whatsapp call, she didn't pick, I called her back again on normal call and said you aren't picking, she responded saying am in uber car now, call me on video again, I did but she still didnt pick. So I decided not to bother since declaring her whereabout seems frutile. She called back on normal call saying she was on her way home to pick some her items to quickly do an advertising shoot to model to her customers in the hospital room, that she didnt want me to get mad at her reason why she didn't tell me before she left, I was like its not a big deal telling me that after which I have found out she never did go out there to buy water.

Husbands and fathers in the house, in this kind of situation, what could have been your thought? As for me, something was not just right, and the most damning part of all these is leaving the kids at the mercy of just the house maid, I feel if there is something she is hiding from me and leaving the kids like that is what
the issue of trust has led us to, I am left in amazement and total disappointment.
There are so many humans with accurate intuition and I don't know if yours is accurate.
is she protective of her phone and doesn't leave it in the open?
women always use annoyance as a decoy and it is well known.
well if you want to find out, brother man install a spy app or monitor on her phone, don't do it if you're not strong mentally and emotionally.
prepare to see the worst if you do it, and if you so choose to do it, do not create an air of suspicion, act smooth and unaware, then smartly do the deed when she's asleep to give you time.
that way you'll have to see who she texts. there are about two spy monitors that are free.
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by MrNipplesLover(m): 11:52am On Nov 25, 2021
Married men will understand the OP very well.

Once thing not good in any relationship is not being OPEN and straightforward.

When u lie to ur partner, there is issue.

I always find it annoying when I see married people being unfaithful. That shiit is very annoying.

We wey still never marry self dey faithful to our bitches... In the sense that, we have nothing to hide say we get some other bitches outside and when it's time to recycle, we let it straight to them.

U don't give ur man a suspicious impression in ur relationship, u're creating issues already if u do.

Na why I hate all this commitment stuff, bitches go always be bitches... They ain't faithful.

No faithful girl around, na me know wetin I dey talk, cos I gat plenty girls.

OP, I'm sorry to tell u that ur woman is an unfaithful partner...

Those wey dey comment say u never get evidence no understand wetin u dey talk.

That's why I said na married men go understand u.

So, make u wait till u catch ur woman pants down with a man before u go react?

U go wait till eternity without catching her while she's getting drilled outside. grin

The Lord is ur strength.


I hail u, OP.
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by qtguru(m): 11:57am On Nov 25, 2021
Why is she comofrtable leaving 2 kids to go and shoot an advert, what business is she into ? give us more context who are these customers ?
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by Blackdisciple(m): 12:00pm On Nov 25, 2021
Dshocker:


What you wrote up here doesn't say or show any sign of cheating,unless there are other traits she exhibit that you are not telling us.


Ok why didn't she just say " she was on her way home to pick some her items to quickly do an advertising shoot to model to her customers in the hospital room, that she didnt want me to get mad at her"

it's just a very simple thing but she decided to make it hard for him for no reason. I think she's not happy with him that's why she's giving attitude, but never the less that's how cheating wives behave.
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by Nobody: 12:00pm On Nov 25, 2021
Amumaigwe:


Since he is a detective, he sould have piped low until he has a hard fact to support his suspicion before confronting her. With this jumpy attitude of his, he will never catch her even if she cheats.
Thanks for understanding my comment.My comments on nairaland are not for small minded people, I laugh at people who talk rubbish about me because in the real sense I'm wiser than all of them.All these small boys on nairaland expect a 60+ person like me to sound ordinary to them, no no no people of my age speaks in parables.

1 Like

Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by system21: 12:03pm On Nov 25, 2021
KaptainAfrika:
1. Have you cheated on her ?

2. Do you feel that she could have married someone other than you e.g. she could have married someone you feel is better than you?

3. Did you marry her without any pressure? e.g. she got pregnant for you out of wedlock, you felt it was the time for you to get married etc.

4. Did one or both your parents cheat?

5. Are you cheating on her ?
Stupid questions
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by Stanfeelings: 12:07pm On Nov 25, 2021
Skyfornia:


You don't trust that woman one bit...so what are you still doing with her? I'm even irritated with your actions...why let your marriage get to this level ? Has she done anything in the past that prompted you to start questioning her moves?

Personally once trust is lost in a relationship, then it is no longer worth it.


IF YOU DONT HAVE ANY THING MEANINGFUL TO SAY, JUST SHUT UP P[LEASE.
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by angelfallz(m): 12:07pm On Nov 25, 2021
You see modelling industry, movie industry, music industry sex is just rampant there.

iLegendd:
Don't marry a model — all of them are well-packaged good-looking próstitutes. Her CEO and Godfather must have sex with her whether you like it or not, but if you accuse her of it, she'll swear with her father's grave that she hasn't done it and never will.

See, I'm an insider in the modeling industry and I'm speaking from experience. The crown of one model is in my room as I type.

You act too gentle and trust me, these models like bad men more. Dem no born that woman wey go yell at me. Yelling alone will make the marriage crash.

For a man to be respected, you must imbibe principles in a woman's head during courtship, but most of you get beclouded by beauty and end up giving a woman too many leeway to insult you along the line.

As I said, don't marry a model — they are only good as baby mamas. All of them cheat because they can't help it.

They are good-looking and there are too many extremely good-looking male models wooing them and it's hard to turn down all of them.

As long as her husband or boyfriend won't find out and the guy is not a kiss and tell, she'll sleep with him even if she is too religious. Simple.

One more thing, female models HATE condoms. They want it raw and they don't care if you're infected. As long as it's raw, they're good. They don't care about the consequences. Afterall, they are beautiful, so men will always be chasing them.

Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by Nobody: 12:09pm On Nov 25, 2021
Lovebliss2:
You have trust issues.
Work on it and don't destroy your marriage.
can you trust a liar? Just curious
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by R0ckefeller: 12:09pm On Nov 25, 2021
CuteMaro:
Sorry man. There's something fishy and she's probably cheating (Went for a quick one). You shouldn't have told her you were at the hospital to see when she'll come back.

She yelled at you as a cover-up coz there's no excuse lol. It's very common among cheating ladies.

But then again you must begin to look out for other clues. I wish you luck in your marriage!
I think you are right on that yelling part but it still a two-way thing
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by Druss(m): 12:12pm On Nov 25, 2021
Whether cheating or not, I am surprised she is not at the children's side. When I had ordinary gas from eating beans, my mother (God bless her) postponed her activities and sat down with me to help ease the pain.

This one, kids are admitted in clinic and yet ..hmm. I don't know about cheating o but there better be a very good reason. Mothers don't joke around with sick children.
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by jaxxy(m): 12:12pm On Nov 25, 2021
chatinent:
Trust issues...but there are two ways to see it from.

I will make my point straightforward and will not mince words.

1. Inasmuch as you tried so much to make it look like you are very caring, the real truth was that you were just suspiciously thinking she was cheating and bombing her with calls and she got irritated. Don't get me wrong...she might have ulterior motives. She might not too. But if she hadn't and it was about the quick sales, if you guys had no trust issues, she would have told you.

You called her to ask where she was and immediately re-called her when you got to the hospital to ask why she wasn't in the hospital. Sb you just called to ask where she was?

Infections aren't that a very big deal like near-death diseases! You made it look like your kids being in the hospital was a solid prove to welcome criticisms against your wife for leaving them behind. She was with the maid you employed! Stop making it look like the maid was a foreign devil abeg...no bi she dey take care of dem normal normal?

Inasmuch as I don't support cheating and her picking business over health, baba, if your wife is not cheating and you are bombing her like this with suspicion, you'll push her to cheat! It works like magic.


Build your trust issues.

2. If she is seemingly promiscuous, stop assuming and gather evidences. If I suspect my wife is cheating, I wouldn't let her know I suspect her to avoid her covering tracks. I'd make sure I have my evidences. For example, if I know she isn't in the hospital, I would park and watch who she returns with from afar. I would call her on video once and if she didn't receive, I wouldn't even receive her voice calls...because she have to explain it. I would fake going to work one day only to secretly follow her to all places she goes..waiting for my evidences to add up.

I love evidences! Suspicion is not enough! It is with my evidences I'll react with conviction....not assumptions!

If your intuition is telling you she is cheating and you aren't making any move to catch her red-handed to satisfy that intuition, you are also making another big mistake because she is not cheating until you catch her red-handed cheating.

Marriage matters aren't based on assumptions!

U would leave ur work and follow ur wife everywhere she’s going to get evidence doesn’t make sense unless ure jobless. There are better ways to get evidence than going crazy physically stalking her to the detriment of work and even physical well-being or sanity.

U don’t even need to catch them red handed just the red flags being up is enough to take certain decisions. I personally will not wait to see full blown evidence to act.
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by JaskanFactor: 12:12pm On Nov 25, 2021
UyaiIncomparabl:


Do you mean that you don't mind being in an open relationship?

Its not like you have a choice, people like variety by nature , they can either do their variety in front of you or behind your back, take your choice. No doubt there are exceptions to the rule, but those are few.
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by capnies: 12:16pm On Nov 25, 2021
Iyaebe:
If this is all you've got to accuse her of infidelity then go work on your mindset because you've got no proof and evidence.

WHAT LEVEL OF REASONING IS THIS, WHAT STOPPED HER FROM TELLING HER HUSBAND THE TRUTH IF SHE WAS CLEAN. ONLY AN ACCOMPLICE CAN TALK THIS WAY. SHE LEFT SICK CHILDREN IN THE HOSPITAL AT THE MERCY OF A MAID AND YOUR TALKING, MAYBE SHE WENT TO PRAY AT THE SYNAGOGUE.

I THINK WHAT I SENSE HERE IS THAT THE MAN IS TOO SOFT AND CARING WITH AN IRRESPONSIBLE WIFE, PROBABLY A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN, THAT IS THE BIGGEST MISTAKE ANY MAN CAN MAKE.
EVERY MAN THAT NEEDS PEACE IN HIS HOME MUST I REPEAT MUST HAVE SOME LEVEL OF AGGRESSION OR YOUR IN. FOR A LONG UBER RIDE FROM WOMEN.
EVERY MAN MUST TAKE 60% REDPILL TO HAVE A STABLE HOME
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by Stainlezzking: 12:17pm On Nov 25, 2021
So these girls nonsense attitude still continue after marriage?
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by showafrica(m): 12:18pm On Nov 25, 2021
hashbag1:
Nlanders,
I have been married for 9 years now, amidst several incidences that gave me suspicions over my wife's infidelity. The one that happened of recent gave me nothing more than great suspicion over any other.

My daughter and son got infection, they were admitted into the hospital. On this faithful day, I was there with them and I left the hospital in the afternoon to get something for them to eat, I got back with the food and quickly rushed down to my office to tidy some work. I felt hungry and decided to drive out, on my way to the restaurant leads to the hospital, I was in traffic when I put a call through to my wife whom I asked how she was coping and how the kids were doing, while on call with her, I heard sounds of car horns so I asked if she was out, she said yes that she was going to get water across the stree, so i was like you shouldnt have stressed yourself since
the house maid was with her, next thing she yelled at me saying why am I making ascertion as to who should go get the water or not, I was like but that isnt a big deal to ask, she was like well the house girl have been the one running errands all day, I responded saying instead of yelling at me, you would have just responded by saying the above.

As a responsible and concerned father, I decided to suspend dinner and branch at the hospital which took me 8 mins to get there because of traffic. On getting to the hospital, lo and behold, my wife was not there, just the kids and the house maid. I asked the house maid where madam was, she said she stepped out without saying where she was going. I immediately put a call through to her. "Babes where are you at, just got here now and you are not here". She immediately hung up on me, I called back, she didnt pick, called her again didn't pick, waited few mins and called, she picked and yelled "why are you looking for me" I was like but you claimed you went to
go get water but its been up to 15mins and you are not here yet, next thing she said was I'm in a uber car, Wow uber car when you just said you went across the street to get water, how does being in uber car relate to that. I requested a video call, I hung up the normal call and called her on whatsapp call, she didn't pick, I called her back again on normal call and said you aren't picking, she responded saying am in uber car now, call me on video again, I did but she still didnt pick. So I decided not to bother since declaring her whereabout seems frutile. She called back on normal call saying she was on her way home to pick some her items to quickly do an advertising shoot to model to her customers in the hospital room, that she didnt want me to get mad at her reason why she didn't tell me before she left, I was like its not a big deal telling me that after which I have found out she never did go out there to buy water.

Husbands and fathers in the house, in this kind of situation, what could have been your thought? As for me, something was not just right, and the most damning part of all these is leaving the kids at the mercy of just the house maid, I feel if there is something she is hiding from me and leaving the kids like that is what
the issue of trust has led us to, I am left in amazement and total disappointment.

Whenever, a woman start lying about her movement... You should be worried. It might not be for cheating sake but whatever it is, is never a good motive. If she comes back and apologize, no problem but you have to start monitoring her. Its a wife and must be protected, some of them are been hypnotized and they only realize themselves when the damage is already done. Do a whatsapp monitoring to her phone(whatsapp web) and start tracking her locations with the GPS. If its girl friend, i will advise you no to worry yourself but a mother of your children must be checked and protected.

1 Like

Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by Nobody: 12:18pm On Nov 25, 2021
capnies:


WHAT LEVEL OF REASONING IS THIS, WHAT STOPPED HER FROM TELLING HER HUSBAND THE TRUTH IF SHE WAS CLEAN. ONLY AN ACCOMPLICE CAN TALK THIS WAY. SHE LEFT SICK CHILDREN IN THE HOSPITAL AT THE MERCY OF A MAID AND YOUR TALKING, MAYBE SHE WENT TO PRAY AT THE SYNAGOGUE.

I THINK WHAT I SENSE HERE IS THAT THE MAN IS TOO SOFT AND CARING WITH AN IRRESPONSIBLE WIFE, PROBABLY A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN, THAT IS THE BIGGEST MISTAKE ANY MAN CAN MAKE.
EVERY MAN THAT NEEDS PEACE IN HIS HOME MUST I REPEAT MUST HAVE SOME LEVEL OF AGGRESSION OR YOUR IN. FOR A LONG UBER RIDE FROM WOMEN.
EVERY MAN MUST TAKE 60% REDPILL TO HAVE A STABLE HOME
It is the level of reasoning beyond you.I still maintain she's innocent until proven otherwise. My comments are not for kids.
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by Desusi: 12:20pm On Nov 25, 2021
Can two walk together except they agreed Amos 3:3?
In marriage, there should be absolute trust.More especially this evil times. Your husband should know your whereabout, so also your wife. Where either of the parties is not been specific or authentic, then,there's cause to worry.Jesus says your yeah must be yeah and your nay, nay.Anything short of this is evil.To diagnose this issue properly, are both of you born again Christian watched in the blood? If no,anything can happened.
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by Nobody: 12:20pm On Nov 25, 2021
MemeRoyal:


Somebody will marry this one o angry

I am a grandpa whom obviously have seen life more than you. I always pray none of my grandkids, my loved ones and even the ones of my enemies come across any woman of your mentality.

I pray you get your type of man. Good luck
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by system21: 12:25pm On Nov 25, 2021
Your wife is definitely cheating, what you portray here is sign of a cheating woman, you just need to be calm and mature until you catch her red handed. If you have access to her phone contact me I will give you what you need to necked her yanch
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by ignacini: 12:26pm On Nov 25, 2021
One thing you should know is that, never allow your emotions to cloud your decisions in life.
Why should your wife yell at you when you suggest an easier option of sending the house help to get the water (red flag}.
You suspended the dinner, rushed to the hospital and behold she was not there. You called her and she yelled at you again (red flag).
Then suddenly the story changed from water to Uber car, then to advertising shoot.

Sir, matters like this is what people sign up for in marriage cos there's nothing anyone will tell you that will hold waters. From your story you are really insecure in your marriage, i dont know who is marrying who lolz.
Please work on yourself and take good care of your kids and your wife. Please remember you are the HUSBAND.
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by robortonia: 12:28pm On Nov 25, 2021
hashbag1:
Nlanders,
I have been married for 9 years now, amidst several incidences that gave me suspicions over my wife's infidelity. The one that happened of recent gave me nothing more than great suspicion over any other.

My daughter and son got infection, they were admitted into the hospital. On this faithful day, I was there with them and I left the hospital in the afternoon to get something for them to eat, I got back with the food and quickly rushed down to my office to tidy some work. I felt hungry and decided to drive out, on my way to the restaurant leads to the hospital, I was in traffic when I put a call through to my wife whom I asked how she was coping and how the kids were doing, while on call with her, I heard sounds of car horns so I asked if she was out, she said yes that she was going to get water across the stree, so i was like you shouldnt have stressed yourself since
the house maid was with her, next thing she yelled at me saying why am I making ascertion as to who should go get the water or not, I was like but that isnt a big deal to ask, she was like well the house girl have been the one running errands all day, I responded saying instead of yelling at me, you would have just responded by saying the above.

As a responsible and concerned father, I decided to suspend dinner and branch at the hospital which took me 8 mins to get there because of traffic. On getting to the hospital, lo and behold, my wife was not there, just the kids and the house maid. I asked the house maid where madam was, she said she stepped out without saying where she was going. I immediately put a call through to her. "Babes where are you at, just got here now and you are not here". She immediately hung up on me, I called back, she didnt pick, called her again didn't pick, waited few mins and called, she picked and yelled "why are you looking for me" I was like but you claimed you went to
go get water but its been up to 15mins and you are not here yet, next thing she said was I'm in a uber car, Wow uber car when you just said you went across the street to get water, how does being in uber car relate to that. I requested a video call, I hung up the normal call and called her on whatsapp call, she didn't pick, I called her back again on normal call and said you aren't picking, she responded saying am in uber car now, call me on video again, I did but she still didnt pick. So I decided not to bother since declaring her whereabout seems frutile. She called back on normal call saying she was on her way home to pick some her items to quickly do an advertising shoot to model to her customers in the hospital room, that she didnt want me to get mad at her reason why she didn't tell me before she left, I was like its not a big deal telling me that after which I have found out she never did go out there to buy water.

Husbands and fathers in the house, in this kind of situation, what could have been your thought? As for me, something was not just right, and the most damning part of all these is leaving the kids at the mercy of just the house maid, I feel if there is something she is hiding from me and leaving the kids like that is what
the issue of trust has led us to, I am left in amazement and total disappointment.


SERIOUS RED FLAG BRO

MY PASTOR TOLD ME MOST WIVES WILL LEAD THEIR HUSBANDS TO HELL AND SOME HUSBANDS WILL LEAD THEIR WIVES TO HELL IN THE END

MARRIAGE IS OVERRATED
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by BlissGod: 12:28pm On Nov 25, 2021
I don't know how long you've suspected your wife but us getting more clear that most men in nairaland have a twisted version of relationship, some absorb the things written by children here.

This case between you and your wife is as easy as pie but you decided to complicate matter by posting it on nairaland.

You called her she said she wanted to buy water.
15mins later you showed up and asking for her whereabouts

You called severaly on video call no answer
You called voice call and she answered

You decided to assume she's cheating on you.
From my standpoint that's lame.

She told you that she went for some business issues.
No problem.

YOUR MARRIAGE HAVE ABIG HOLE OF TRUST ISSUES.
NAIRALAND AND THE PEOPLE YOU SEEK ADVICE FROM WIDENED THAT GAP.

If you truly have suspected for quite some time, investigate her yourself.
It's simple, follow her without her knowing trace her and try as much as possible to get into her phone not by force but with sense.

When you gather solid information then make your assertations not assumptions before you destroy a marriage of 9years.

May God give you wisdom and please keep this information to yourself and away from your friends before they pour petrol into this small fire.

Use your sense when everything gbese na your head e go land not thiers.
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by aminusodiq(m): 12:32pm On Nov 25, 2021
phorllytony:
your story sweet bro
na real life ooo... D tin pain me die angry my guy was a caring type... He dosent deserve that crap of a gf
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by MightySparrow: 12:32pm On Nov 25, 2021
hashbag1:
Nlanders,
I have been married for 9 years now, amidst several incidences that gave me suspicions over my wife's infidelity. The one that happened of recent gave me nothing more than great suspicion over any other.

My daughter and son got infection, they were admitted into the hospital. On this faithful day, I was there with them and I left the hospital in the afternoon to get something for them to eat, I got back with the food and quickly rushed down to my office to tidy some work. I felt hungry and decided to drive out, on my way to the restaurant leads to the hospital, I was in traffic when I put a call through to my wife whom I asked how she was coping and how the kids were doing, while on call with her, I heard sounds of car horns so I asked if she was out, she said yes that she was going to get water across the stree, so i was like you shouldnt have stressed yourself since
the house maid was with her, next thing she yelled at me saying why am I making ascertion as to who should go get the water or not, I was like but that isnt a big deal to ask, she was like well the house girl have been the one running errands all day, I responded saying instead of yelling at me, you would have just responded by saying the above.

As a responsible and concerned father, I decided to suspend dinner and branch at the hospital which took me 8 mins to get there because of traffic. On getting to the hospital, lo and behold, my wife was not there, just the kids and the house maid. I asked the house maid where madam was, she said she stepped out without saying where she was going. I immediately put a call through to her. "Babes where are you at, just got here now and you are not here". She immediately hung up on me, I called back, she didnt pick, called her again didn't pick, waited few mins and called, she picked and yelled "why are you looking for me" I was like but you claimed you went to
go get water but its been up to 15mins and you are not here yet, next thing she said was I'm in a uber car, Wow uber car when you just said you went across the street to get water, how does being in uber car relate to that. I requested a video call, I hung up the normal call and called her on whatsapp call, she didn't pick, I called her back again on normal call and said you aren't picking, she responded saying am in uber car now, call me on video again, I did but she still didnt pick. So I decided not to bother since declaring her whereabout seems frutile. She called back on normal call saying she was on her way home to pick some her items to quickly do an advertising shoot to model to her customers in the hospital room, that she didnt want me to get mad at her reason why she didn't tell me before she left, I was like its not a big deal telling me that after which I have found out she never did go out there to buy water.

Husbands and fathers in the house, in this kind of situation, what could have been your thought? As for me, something was not just right, and the most damning part of all these is leaving the kids at the mercy of just the house maid, I feel if there is something she is hiding from me and leaving the kids like that is what
the issue of trust has led us to, I am left in amazement and total disappointment.

What work is your wife doing?
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by kiddkash(m): 12:33pm On Nov 25, 2021
hashbag1:
Nlanders,
I have been married for 9 years now, amidst several incidences that gave me suspicions over my wife's infidelity. The one that happened of recent gave me nothing more than great suspicion over any other.

My daughter and son got infection, they were admitted into the hospital. On this faithful day, I was there with them and I left the hospital in the afternoon to get something for them to eat, I got back with the food and quickly rushed down to my office to tidy some work. I felt hungry and decided to drive out, on my way to the restaurant leads to the hospital, I was in traffic when I put a call through to my wife whom I asked how she was coping and how the kids were doing, while on call with her, I heard sounds of car horns so I asked if she was out, she said yes that she was going to get water across the stree, so i was like you shouldnt have stressed yourself since
the house maid was with her, next thing she yelled at me saying why am I making ascertion as to who should go get the water or not, I was like but that isnt a big deal to ask, she was like well the house girl have been the one running errands all day, I responded saying instead of yelling at me, you would have just responded by saying the above.

As a responsible and concerned father, I decided to suspend dinner and branch at the hospital which took me 8 mins to get there because of traffic. On getting to the hospital, lo and behold, my wife was not there, just the kids and the house maid. I asked the house maid where madam was, she said she stepped out without saying where she was going. I immediately put a call through to her. "Babes where are you at, just got here now and you are not here". She immediately hung up on me, I called back, she didnt pick, called her again didn't pick, waited few mins and called, she picked and yelled "why are you looking for me" I was like but you claimed you went to
go get water but its been up to 15mins and you are not here yet, next thing she said was I'm in a uber car, Wow uber car when you just said you went across the street to get water, how does being in uber car relate to that. I requested a video call, I hung up the normal call and called her on whatsapp call, she didn't pick, I called her back again on normal call and said you aren't picking, she responded saying am in uber car now, call me on video again, I did but she still didnt pick. So I decided not to bother since declaring her whereabout seems frutile. She called back on normal call saying she was on her way home to pick some her items to quickly do an advertising shoot to model to her customers in the hospital room, that she didnt want me to get mad at her reason why she didn't tell me before she left, I was like its not a big deal telling me that after which I have found out she never did go out there to buy water.

Husbands and fathers in the house, in this kind of situation, what could have been your thought? As for me, something was not just right, and the most damning part of all these is leaving the kids at the mercy of just the house maid, I feel if there is something she is hiding from me and leaving the kids like that is what
the issue of trust has led us to, I am left in amazement and total disappointment.
from experience, she is sneaking around with someone she hopes to cheat with but haven't had the real opportunity to cheat with the person as there are many people around her almost all the time. don't take this harshly, but her mind is not in the marriage and family at this time
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by system21: 12:37pm On Nov 25, 2021
Anonymous15:

There are so many humans with accurate intuition and I don't know if yours is accurate.
is she protective of her phone and doesn't leave it in the open?
women always use annoyance as a decoy and it is well known.
well if you want to find out, brother man install a spy app or monitor on her phone, don't do it if you're not strong mentally and emotionally.
prepare to see the worst if you do it, and if you so choose to do it, do not create an air of suspicion, act smooth and unaware, then smartly do the deed when she's asleep to give you time.
that way you'll have to see who she texts. there are about two spy monitors that are free.

Correct guy. Na only olodo him wife go cheat and he no fit catch am red handed
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by fof1: 12:39pm On Nov 25, 2021
hashbag1:
Nlanders,
I have been married for 9 years now, amidst several incidences that gave me suspicions over my wife's infidelity. The one that happened of recent gave me nothing more than great suspicion over any other.

My daughter and son got infection, they were admitted into the hospital. On this faithful day, I was there with them and I left the hospital in the afternoon to get something for them to eat, I got back with the food and quickly rushed down to my office to tidy some work. I felt hungry and decided to drive out, on my way to the restaurant leads to the hospital, I was in traffic when I put a call through to my wife whom I asked how she was coping and how the kids were doing, while on call with her, I heard sounds of car horns so I asked if she was out, she said yes that she was going to get water across the stree, so i was like you shouldnt have stressed yourself since
the house maid was with her, next thing she yelled at me saying why am I making ascertion as to who should go get the water or not, I was like but that isnt a big deal to ask, she was like well the house girl have been the one running errands all day, I responded saying instead of yelling at me, you would have just responded by saying the above.

As a responsible and concerned father, I decided to suspend dinner and branch at the hospital which took me 8 mins to get there because of traffic. On getting to the hospital, lo and behold, my wife was not there, just the kids and the house maid. I asked the house maid where madam was, she said she stepped out without saying where she was going. I immediately put a call through to her. "Babes where are you at, just got here now and you are not here". She immediately hung up on me, I called back, she didnt pick, called her again didn't pick, waited few mins and called, she picked and yelled "why are you looking for me" I was like but you claimed you went to
go get water but its been up to 15mins and you are not here yet, next thing she said was I'm in a uber car, Wow uber car when you just said you went across the street to get water, how does being in uber car relate to that. I requested a video call, I hung up the normal call and called her on whatsapp call, she didn't pick, I called her back again on normal call and said you aren't picking, she responded saying am in uber car now, call me on video again, I did but she still didnt pick. So I decided not to bother since declaring her whereabout seems frutile. She called back on normal call saying she was on her way home to pick some her items to quickly do an advertising shoot to model to her customers in the hospital room, that she didnt want me to get mad at her reason why she didn't tell me before she left, I was like its not a big deal telling me that after which I have found out she never did go out there to buy water.

Husbands and fathers in the house, in this kind of situation, what could have been your thought? As for me, something was not just right, and the most damning part of all these is leaving the kids at the mercy of just the house maid, I feel if there is something she is hiding from me and leaving the kids like that is what
the issue of trust has led us to, I am left in amazement and total disappointment.


Pls further Prove all her Continous Lies as Points to Note...INCONSISTENCY and Devasive Conducts are Clear Signs of Deceits...A Woman that Lies alot will be a Cheat,Prostitute and a Thief at Home...Be ADVISED. Prove Ur Wofe b4 U take Decisions.
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by LaSenior: 12:39pm On Nov 25, 2021
Your wife is cheating , for refusing video calls it shows she's cheating

She's cheating she's cheating she's cheating

The earlier you start telling yourself the truth that the better for you
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by kiddkash(m): 12:39pm On Nov 25, 2021
Iyaebe:
If this is all you've got to accuse her of infidelity then go work on your mindset because you've got no proof and evidence.
if your man starts telling you that he is there when he isn't, shouting at you when you ask, trying to deflect the question, making you feel like you are the one going crazy, then it means he isn't cheating, but he as met the person he hopes to cheat with. his head is no longer in the marriage at the time and is waiting for the great time to sex the person.
Re: I Am Confused As A Father And As Husband by hashbag1: 12:40pm On Nov 25, 2021
Guys, blv me its not like am reading all comments here, just digging into the real comments not just some women support women comments or some small pikin wey never
grow balls yet. I have some few points to clear the air here:

1: Majority of what I have seen here so far boils down to hack her phone, put a spy and so on and so forth,based on my previous statement that we have had series of
issues that points towards infidelity, so the issue of phone tracking even though i didnt make use of sophisticated software, she got to know so phone is not even
what I can use right now, she has upgraded from that. However I know if access is granted to listen to her calls, I def would get evidence.

2: I have done DNA 4 years ago, both kids are mine.

3: Yes there have been trust issues from wayback beginning from where i found out that she saved her main ex number as another name and lied
on her mothers grave that they never spoke where call logs showed otherwise amongst plenty other incidences

4: I understand people saying I would have calmed down when i found out she wasnt in the hospital, the thought of her hiding something from me wasnt what roused
my actions, but that she left the kids with the maid, some people here saying leaving kids with maid isnt a big deal, isnt this same nairaland where we
read stories of maids abducting kids? I can never in this life risk such.

Now let me give a clearer version of what gave me the intution that something was up. That very morning on this faithful day, she had called me she was coming home
to bath so she can go back, I was like bae, plz i will be coming down there now to represent you, then u can leave, she was like no her body itches that she cant wait
i was like oh well, I will call the hospital to ensure that they watch over the kids since they will be left with the house maid, lo and behold after hanging up with
her, 3 mins later she stepped in. I was like so u already left even before calling me, she was like yea i couldnt wait. Now for you guys saying she probably
didnt want to get me mad by not telling me she went home, what happened to calling me and say bae i need to quickly get home to pick my modelling stuff, come stay while
i leave, but hell naw she didnt. Now what sparked my major suspicion was that, guys I know this madam well, if at any point she was hiding anything from me, and I have evidence
that shes telling a lie, she will immediately own up and say ok i lied, in the situation that she was actually in the uber as of the time I called her n asked
where she was, I swear guys she will immediately tell me shes on her way home and will gladly take my video call.

But in this case, when i called her, she was in a silent environment, call it interrogation or whatever but i know what am talking about, then she hung up immediately, what sign
does that immediate hanging up gives? Shes rushing to quickly gather herself together and leave the scene shes at because she knows i will request a video call.
The second and third call i put through that she didnt pick goes to show shes taking more time to gather herself to leave the scene. Then next time she picks
and then says am in uber, call me now on video shows to me that the uber had picked her up, waited for her to get done and head to whatever destination she was heading
before she heads back to the hospital, and by virtue of not picking the video call in the uber means she knows def well that I will ask that she shows me the
enviroment where she was at, because she told me the uber guy already reached the house, because I called security and they said she has not come home yet. All shades
of lies came through that really stink harder than what I have never experienced before. Guys talking about evidence, to get evidence from a smart cheating or
secretive partner is really hard, most especially in this hard Lagos where u need to work hard day and night to survive. As of now, November trip on her app is deleted,while
september and previous months shows there which u cant do on ur own unless you contact the company to delete it, to me thats trying to avoid getting info from the ride, because it was the same cab that picked her up that also dropped her back
at the hospital. Marriage is something else my brother, at this point, I may need to get me a side chic that will wallow away these worries and pain i feel
whenever these type of incident come up.

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