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Are Children Really An Achievement?? - Family (3) - Nairaland

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The Year Is Gradually Coming To An End. What Is Your Achievement? / Is Marriage An Achievement?? / Marriage Is Not An Achievement (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by Bigpapi: 5:02pm On Dec 13, 2021
Supreme145:
There is this motion that giving birth to children is an achievement in this country. I see young guys in mid and late twenties rushing into marriage while they are barely standing on their feet. From someone that comes from a family of 10 I'm sure if my dad is given a second chance he won't give birth as much children again. Let me share some of my experiences as regards giving birth without proper planning or sustainable income.

I've a neighbor in my compound, he's 32 and in his final year in the university, I can hardly have decent conversation with him without hearing about how he wants to get married. I would always remind him that he's living in a one room apartment, still a student without a strong source of income, but he would counter me saying that he can always start small and grow with his wife. Moreover when he gives birth he would have an investment.

I've have another friend that was a classmate in secondary school, he graduated the year I got admission though he had some issues with his results. One day he called me that he's married and I was surprised, though he is an artisan into all those parapets and pop stuffs I know he wasn't financially buoyant enough to carry a family. The last time I visited him he was looking malnourished and unable to sort out his issues in school almost four years after because according to him any money that he gets already has a pending issue waiting for it. He's looking far older than his elder brother who's still single, he looks 38 when he's just 30. He consoled himself by telling me that even if he doesn't have money he already has two kids which he sees an investment and a great achievement. Meanwhile they are cramped into a single room apartment and none of the kids are enrolled in school.

Last week while we were training in the evening, an argument broke out between two young guys. I was just by the side observing what was happening, I kept hearing stuffs like....why you dey argue with that guy? you no know say na person father he be? that guy don born two children o abi you think say e easy to born, na big achievement be that o. Now this is a guy that is about 25 years and has no sustainable means of income, he works in peoples farms and other menial jobs to make ends meet.

My next door married neighbor has become a torn in my flesh, he's always borrowing from me without paying so it's obvious he's struggling financially, factor in the constant arguments with his wife due to shortage of funds all the time. I once asked him why rushed to get married without a good source of income and he bluntly told me that he had always been broke while he was single and still broke now that he's married the only difference is that he can boast of his kids as an achievement unlike when he was single that he had nothing to boast of.

I have no issues what so ever with how anyone choose to life their life but considering the economic condition of this country now bringing in kids without proper plans is not the way to go. If my dad had given birth to maybe 3 kids I'm sure he wouldn't be stressed out the way he is now and the resources used in training 8 kids would be better managed on just 3kids.

Personally I feel that one of the surest way to perpetual poverty as a young guy is to get married while struggling financially. Like one of the examples above, he cast aside his personal development and aspirations just to cater for his family. Supposing he's still single I'm sure he would have cleared he's outstanding school fees and maybe get his certificate.

Well since I'm still single and still struggling I don't judge anybody, every mallam to his kettle. As for me no marriage till I'm financially stable enough to afford at least 3 bedroom flat, a small car and substantial savings. It would be an abomination for me to bring a child into this world to pass through the kind of life I had growing up.







Just born one or two finish

2 Likes

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by WoundedLamb: 5:02pm On Dec 13, 2021
Most people can have kids. But training someone is definitely an achievement.

4 Likes

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by Spartachico007(m): 5:03pm On Dec 13, 2021
Not really but children are wonderful gift from God


Reason why I said not really is because person wey born ,na pikin go bury ham and person wey no born na still pikin go bury ham

1 Like

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by Arisenews2: 5:04pm On Dec 13, 2021
For a man, Yes. To keep your legacy.

Meanwhile, See Abandoned 500 Million naira home, 70 mansion and luxury cars of Ezego of Ihiala 20 years after his demise in 1999

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Smr7qlZsC4E

1 Like

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by Danjikanbauchi: 5:05pm On Dec 13, 2021
To you it may not be but to the society you are a responsible human

1 Like

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by MsFaith: 5:06pm On Dec 13, 2021
Supreme145:
There is this motion that giving birth to children is an achievement in this country. I see young guys in mid and late twenties rushing into marriage while they are barely standing on their feet. From someone that comes from a family of 10 I'm sure if my dad is given a second chance he won't give birth as much children again. Let me share some of my experiences as regards giving birth without proper planning or sustainable income.

I've a neighbor in my compound, he's 32 and in his final year in the university, I can hardly have decent conversation with him without hearing about how he wants to get married. I would always remind him that he's living in a one room apartment, still a student without a strong source of income, but he would counter me saying that he can always start small and grow with his wife. Moreover when he gives birth he would have an investment.

I've have another friend that was a classmate in secondary school, he graduated the year I got admission though he had some issues with his results. One day he called me that he's married and I was surprised, though he is an artisan into all those parapets and pop stuffs I know he wasn't financially buoyant enough to carry a family. The last time I visited him he was looking malnourished and unable to sort out his issues in school almost four years after because according to him any money that he gets already has a pending issue waiting for it. He's looking far older than his elder brother who's still single, he looks 38 when he's just 30. He consoled himself by telling me that even if he doesn't have money he already has two kids which he sees an investment and a great achievement. Meanwhile they are cramped into a single room apartment and none of the kids are enrolled in school.

Last week while we were training in the evening, an argument broke out between two young guys. I was just by the side observing what was happening, I kept hearing stuffs like....why you dey argue with that guy? you no know say na person father he be? that guy don born two children o abi you think say e easy to born, na big achievement be that o. Now this is a guy that is about 25 years and has no sustainable means of income, he works in peoples farms and other menial jobs to make ends meet.

My next door married neighbor has become a torn in my flesh, he's always borrowing from me without paying so it's obvious he's struggling financially, factor in the constant arguments with his wife due to shortage of funds all the time. I once asked him why rushed to get married without a good source of income and he bluntly told me that he had always been broke while he was single and still broke now that he's married the only difference is that he can boast of his kids as an achievement unlike when he was single that he had nothing to boast of.

I have no issues what so ever with how anyone choose to life their life but considering the economic condition of this country now bringing in kids without proper plans is not the way to go. If my dad had given birth to maybe 3 kids I'm sure he wouldn't be stressed out the way he is now and the resources used in training 8 kids would be better managed on just 3kids.

Personally I feel that one of the surest way to perpetual poverty as a young guy is to get married while struggling financially. Like one of the examples above, he cast aside his personal development and aspirations just to cater for his family. Supposing he's still single I'm sure he would have cleared he's outstanding school fees and maybe get his certificate.

Well since I'm still single and still struggling I don't judge anybody, every mallam to his kettle. As for me no marriage till I'm financially stable enough to afford at least 3 bedroom flat, a small car and substantial savings. It would be an abomination for me to bring a child into this world to pass through the kind of life I had growing up.

Another thing. Make sure your wife is working and contributing financially to the family.

E dey important, else, your little go wreck

2 Likes

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by paddyDIGITAL(m): 5:06pm On Dec 13, 2021
Your wealth and possessions may be your achievement, but your children are your achievements and your future.

4 Likes

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by MufasaLion: 5:07pm On Dec 13, 2021
dfrost:
Make I digest comments first.

So op answer us first:

1. Are you an achievement to your parents?

2. Someone said up there: “what you don't have, you won't understand”.

3. Mufasa (not MufasaLion of Nairaland cheesy) said “we are all connected in the great circle of life”.

cry

1 Like

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by greatbuc(m): 5:08pm On Dec 13, 2021
My pastor is the 6th child of 8 .. He became a billionaire because of poverty. He's mom was magret Thatcher reincarnate and his dad died soon after the last born came. If you are not good at making money. Make family and instill dignity in them. Very cheap to train a child. Don't mix them with peers that are of very high class. Teach them to make money early. Let them make zobo and sell in school. Let them earn while learning. Na talk go plenty that's why you must like nagging. Don't have plenty children, train plenty children. My take.

2 Likes

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by Phyde: 5:09pm On Dec 13, 2021
Having children is one thing, taking good care of them not to be hawking pure water on the street is another thing. 70% agreed.

3 Likes

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by Oyiboman69: 5:09pm On Dec 13, 2021
tensazangetsu20:

It's better to be 40 and single and poor than 40 and married and poor.

3 Likes

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by vikgreen01(m): 5:10pm On Dec 13, 2021
Supreme145:
There is this motion that giving birth to children is an achievement in this country. I see young guys in mid and late twenties rushing into marriage while they are barely standing on their feet. From someone that comes from a family of 10 I'm sure if my dad is given a second chance he won't give birth as much children again. Let me share some of my experiences as regards giving birth without proper planning or sustainable income.

I've a neighbor in my compound, he's 32 and in his final year in the university, I can hardly have decent conversation with him without hearing about how he wants to get married. I would always remind him that he's living in a one room apartment, still a student without a strong source of income, but he would counter me saying that he can always start small and grow with his wife. Moreover when he gives birth he would have an investment.

I've have another friend that was a classmate in secondary school, he graduated the year I got admission though he had some issues with his results. One day he called me that he's married and I was surprised, though he is an artisan into all those parapets and pop stuffs I know he wasn't financially buoyant enough to carry a family. The last time I visited him he was looking malnourished and unable to sort out his issues in school almost four years after because according to him any money that he gets already has a pending issue waiting for it. He's looking far older than his elder brother who's still single, he looks 38 when he's just 30. He consoled himself by telling me that even if he doesn't have money he already has two kids which he sees an investment and a great achievement. Meanwhile they are cramped into a single room apartment and none of the kids are enrolled in school.

Last week while we were training in the evening, an argument broke out between two young guys. I was just by the side observing what was happening, I kept hearing stuffs like....why you dey argue with that guy? you no know say na person father he be? that guy don born two children o abi you think say e easy to born, na big achievement be that o. Now this is a guy that is about 25 years and has no sustainable means of income, he works in peoples farms and other menial jobs to make ends meet.

My next door married neighbor has become a torn in my flesh, he's always borrowing from me without paying so it's obvious he's struggling financially, factor in the constant arguments with his wife due to shortage of funds all the time. I once asked him why rushed to get married without a good source of income and he bluntly told me that he had always been broke while he was single and still broke now that he's married the only difference is that he can boast of his kids as an achievement unlike when he was single that he had nothing to boast of.

I have no issues what so ever with how anyone choose to life their life but considering the economic condition of this country now bringing in kids without proper plans is not the way to go. If my dad had given birth to maybe 3 kids I'm sure he wouldn't be stressed out the way he is now and the resources used in training 8 kids would be better managed on just 3kids.

Personally I feel that one of the surest way to perpetual poverty as a young guy is to get married while struggling financially. Like one of the examples above, he cast aside his personal development and aspirations just to cater for his family. Supposing he's still single I'm sure he would have cleared he's outstanding school fees and maybe get his certificate.

Well since I'm still single and still struggling I don't judge anybody, every mallam to his kettle. As for me no marriage till I'm financially stable enough to afford at least 3 bedroom flat, a small car and substantial savings. It would be an abomination for me to bring a child into this world to pass through the kind of life I had growing up.

I use to tell friends and anybody that care to listen that after a child I’m stopping. If wify wants more I’m gonna file a lawsuit and she’s gonna put down a signature on paper to cater for any kids aside the one with my consent. She’s gonna b working as well no b all this daddy go soon reach.
We are no more in the oldies and this present day Nigeria is no joke. U gonna plan yourself well, be financially grounded and have peace of mind till thy kingdom come. Op just chill we are many on this race and ideology. May God help man.!!!

9 Likes

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by Kuriosmynd: 5:11pm On Dec 13, 2021
tensazangetsu20:
Op it's not honestly. It's not even money to take care of kids. Mine is my kids being Nigerian citizens. I will cry myself everyday to sleep. Even dating is so expensive in Nigeria talk less of marriage. Just take a girl out and before you can say jack Robinson 20k is gone whereas me as a single guy will go out and have so much fun for 15k or even 10k. I really don't envy married men especially with all the nonsense I see around me.

15k, 10k, only you for fun......With 5k u will flex yourself brother...unless u go to expensive bars

7 Likes

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by ezechi24(m): 5:12pm On Dec 13, 2021
Foodqueen:
True,but yet again, u might acquire all these and still go broke after marriage.

There is no particular time table to live, things happens. Table can turn on anyone at any time.


this your narative is the problem why africa is the poor and backward...

7 Likes

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by Lightway: 5:15pm On Dec 13, 2021
Hathor5:
I would not say it is an achievement but carrying a pregnancy and giving birth is hard work. At least for me. Some women claim it has been the most beautiful time of their lives. They are superwomen. I am not.

I see no problem in getting married early even though you are still building your life. You can build your lives together and support each other. But I would recommend those young couples to use family planning methods and wait with the kids until they can take care of them.

What's really tough about being pregnant and giving birth

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by Newyorkitis(m): 5:15pm On Dec 13, 2021
In elementary social studies, here are the reasons for marriage.

1: Companionship
2: Procreation
3: Sexual satisfaction
4: Economic cooperation


Know this and no peace. Be you a male/female.

1 Like

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by descarado: 5:16pm On Dec 13, 2021
Again?

Una well done
Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by Cmexy: 5:16pm On Dec 13, 2021
Whyzaid:
To me, there's no achievement in giving birth to children one can't cater for.

God even prepare the garden of Eden before creating Adam

Las Las Adam still come Bleep up... Marry when you’re ready - money or no money - table fit flip anytime

1 Like

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by Trumptech(m): 5:16pm On Dec 13, 2021
So why are you making it a topic when you have already concluded that you don't need a child till you get the money you are looking for. The truth is no one is forcing anyone to marry and have children, it is your choice. Person wey get children na children go bury am and the one wey no get na still children go bury am but whose children na him we no go know.

When you get to old age you will get answers to your questions.

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by Nobody: 5:16pm On Dec 13, 2021
Supreme145:
There is this motion that giving birth to children is an achievement in this country. I see young guys in mid and late twenties rushing into marriage while they are barely standing on their feet. From someone that comes from a family of 10 I'm sure if my dad is given a second chance he won't give birth as much children again. Let me share some of my experiences as regards giving birth without proper planning or sustainable income.

I've a neighbor in my compound, he's 32 and in his final year in the university, I can hardly have decent conversation with him without hearing about how he wants to get married. I would always remind him that he's living in a one room apartment, still a student without a strong source of income, but he would counter me saying that he can always start small and grow with his wife. Moreover when he gives birth he would have an investment.

I've have another friend that was a classmate in secondary school, he graduated the year I got admission though he had some issues with his results. One day he called me that he's married and I was surprised, though he is an artisan into all those parapets and pop stuffs I know he wasn't financially buoyant enough to carry a family. The last time I visited him he was looking malnourished and unable to sort out his issues in school almost four years after because according to him any money that he gets already has a pending issue waiting for it. He's looking far older than his elder brother who's still single, he looks 38 when he's just 30. He consoled himself by telling me that even if he doesn't have money he already has two kids which he sees an investment and a great achievement. Meanwhile they are cramped into a single room apartment and none of the kids are enrolled in school.

Last week while we were training in the evening, an argument broke out between two young guys. I was just by the side observing what was happening, I kept hearing stuffs like....why you dey argue with that guy? you no know say na person father he be? that guy don born two children o abi you think say e easy to born, na big achievement be that o. Now this is a guy that is about 25 years and has no sustainable means of income, he works in peoples farms and other menial jobs to make ends meet.

My next door married neighbor has become a torn in my flesh, he's always borrowing from me without paying so it's obvious he's struggling financially, factor in the constant arguments with his wife due to shortage of funds all the time. I once asked him why rushed to get married without a good source of income and he bluntly told me that he had always been broke while he was single and still broke now that he's married the only difference is that he can boast of his kids as an achievement unlike when he was single that he had nothing to boast of.

I have no issues what so ever with how anyone choose to life their life but considering the economic condition of this country now bringing in kids without proper plans is not the way to go. If my dad had given birth to maybe 3 kids I'm sure he wouldn't be stressed out the way he is now and the resources used in training 8 kids would be better managed on just 3kids.

Personally I feel that one of the surest way to perpetual poverty as a young guy is to get married while struggling financially. Like one of the examples above, he cast aside his personal development and aspirations just to cater for his family. Supposing he's still single I'm sure he would have cleared he's outstanding school fees and maybe get his certificate.

Well since I'm still single and still struggling I don't judge anybody, every mallam to his kettle. As for me no marriage till I'm financially stable enough to afford at least 3 bedroom flat, a small car and substantial savings. It would be an abomination for me to bring a child into this world to pass through the kind of life I had growing up.
You are wise!
Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by lexy2014: 5:17pm On Dec 13, 2021
Supreme145:
There is this motion that giving birth to children is an achievement in this country. I see young guys in mid and late twenties rushing into marriage while they are barely standing on their feet. From someone that comes from a family of 10 I'm sure if my dad is given a second chance he won't give birth as much children again. Let me share some of my experiences as regards giving birth without proper planning or sustainable income.

I've a neighbor in my compound, he's 32 and in his final year in the university, I can hardly have decent conversation with him without hearing about how he wants to get married. I would always remind him that he's living in a one room apartment, still a student without a strong source of income, but he would counter me saying that he can always start small and grow with his wife. Moreover when he gives birth he would have an investment.

I've have another friend that was a classmate in secondary school, he graduated the year I got admission though he had some issues with his results. One day he called me that he's married and I was surprised, though he is an artisan into all those parapets and pop stuffs I know he wasn't financially buoyant enough to carry a family. The last time I visited him he was looking malnourished and unable to sort out his issues in school almost four years after because according to him any money that he gets already has a pending issue waiting for it. He's looking far older than his elder brother who's still single, he looks 38 when he's just 30. He consoled himself by telling me that even if he doesn't have money he already has two kids which he sees an investment and a great achievement. Meanwhile they are cramped into a single room apartment and none of the kids are enrolled in school.

Last week while we were training in the evening, an argument broke out between two young guys. I was just by the side observing what was happening, I kept hearing stuffs like....why you dey argue with that guy? you no know say na person father he be? that guy don born two children o abi you think say e easy to born, na big achievement be that o. Now this is a guy that is about 25 years and has no sustainable means of income, he works in peoples farms and other menial jobs to make ends meet.

My next door married neighbor has become a torn in my flesh, he's always borrowing from me without paying so it's obvious he's struggling financially, factor in the constant arguments with his wife due to shortage of funds all the time. I once asked him why rushed to get married without a good source of income and he bluntly told me that he had always been broke while he was single and still broke now that he's married the only difference is that he can boast of his kids as an achievement unlike when he was single that he had nothing to boast of.

I have no issues what so ever with how anyone choose to life their life but considering the economic condition of this country now bringing in kids without proper plans is not the way to go. If my dad had given birth to maybe 3 kids I'm sure he wouldn't be stressed out the way he is now and the resources used in training 8 kids would be better managed on just 3kids.

Personally I feel that one of the surest way to perpetual poverty as a young guy is to get married while struggling financially. Like one of the examples above, he cast aside his personal development and aspirations just to cater for his family. Supposing he's still single I'm sure he would have cleared he's outstanding school fees and maybe get his certificate.

Well since I'm still single and still struggling I don't judge anybody, every mallam to his kettle. As for me no marriage till I'm financially stable enough to afford at least 3 bedroom flat, a small car and substantial savings. It would be an abomination for me to bring a child into this world to pass through the kind of life I had growing up.

Ask your parents that gave birth to u if u are an achievement
Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by mmsen: 5:18pm On Dec 13, 2021
Any slowpoke can have a child.

It is not an achievement. Most people who have children are doing so out of boredom or carelessness.

6 Likes

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by ofuonyebi: 5:18pm On Dec 13, 2021
In Africa, my fathers country, people born children like ants and cockroaches
but they are got nothing to make those children dreams come to reality
But in other civilized clime, they live a peaceful wealthy life but have one or two children
or sometimes a fine lucky dog to care for..

8 Likes

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by ALFADOS(m): 5:18pm On Dec 13, 2021
Everything happen for a reason, so does anyone know when He or she will be financially OK before getting married or to given birth, all I know is that anything that happened to man is by the will of the Almighty Allah, if you know you know lol

2 Likes

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by zilon12(m): 5:18pm On Dec 13, 2021
If you no born

You just dey useless
Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by lexy2014: 5:18pm On Dec 13, 2021
ezechi24:



this your narative is the problem why africa is the poor and backward...

How did u arrive at that conclusion?
Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by Worksunlimited: 5:19pm On Dec 13, 2021
Supreme145:
There is this motion that giving birth to children is an achievement in this country. I see young guys in mid and late twenties rushing into marriage while they are barely standing on their feet. From someone that comes from a family of 10 I'm sure if my dad is given a second chance he won't give birth as much children again. Let me share some of my experiences as regards giving birth without proper planning or sustainable income.

I've a neighbor in my compound, he's 32 and in his final year in the university, I can hardly have decent conversation with him without hearing about how he wants to get married. I would always remind him that he's living in a one room apartment, still a student without a strong source of income, but he would counter me saying that he can always start small and grow with his wife. Moreover when he gives birth he would have an investment.

I've have another friend that was a classmate in secondary school, he graduated the year I got admission though he had some issues with his results. One day he called me that he's married and I was surprised, though he is an artisan into all those parapets and pop stuffs I know he wasn't financially buoyant enough to carry a family. The last time I visited him he was looking malnourished and unable to sort out his issues in school almost four years after because according to him any money that he gets already has a pending issue waiting for it. He's looking far older than his elder brother who's still single, he looks 38 when he's just 30. He consoled himself by telling me that even if he doesn't have money he already has two kids which he sees an investment and a great achievement. Meanwhile they are cramped into a single room apartment and none of the kids are enrolled in school.

Last week while we were training in the evening, an argument broke out between two young guys. I was just by the side observing what was happening, I kept hearing stuffs like....why you dey argue with that guy? you no know say na person father he be? that guy don born two children o abi you think say e easy to born, na big achievement be that o. Now this is a guy that is about 25 years and has no sustainable means of income, he works in peoples farms and other menial jobs to make ends meet.

My next door married neighbor has become a torn in my flesh, he's always borrowing from me without paying so it's obvious he's struggling financially, factor in the constant arguments with his wife due to shortage of funds all the time. I once asked him why rushed to get married without a good source of income and he bluntly told me that he had always been broke while he was single and still broke now that he's married the only difference is that he can boast of his kids as an achievement unlike when he was single that he had nothing to boast of.

I have no issues what so ever with how anyone choose to life their life but considering the economic condition of this country now bringing in kids without proper plans is not the way to go. If my dad had given birth to maybe 3 kids I'm sure he wouldn't be stressed out the way he is now and the resources used in training 8 kids would be better managed on just 3kids.

Personally I feel that one of the surest way to perpetual poverty as a young guy is to get married while struggling financially. Like one of the examples above, he cast aside his personal development and aspirations just to cater for his family. Supposing he's still single I'm sure he would have cleared he's outstanding school fees and maybe get his certificate.

Well since I'm still single and still struggling I don't judge anybody, every mallam to his kettle. As for me no marriage till I'm financially stable enough to afford at least 3 bedroom flat, a small car and substantial savings. It would be an abomination for me to bring a child into this world to pass through the kind of life I had growing up.

The real question is, is getting married an achievement?

I am in my thirties and not married but I am happy, paying my bills, eating good and enjoying my singularity without some uncalled for b.s..

Yet. Society wouldn't let me rest with marry marry talk.. instead of the society to talk to the women of this new generation to behave themselves and stop looking for ready made men, comparing hardworking men to them obi cubana and co...

If na so e easy why dem too never make am.. Abi dem do money for only man to spend?

3 Likes

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by HelipsTech: 5:20pm On Dec 13, 2021
I once asked him why rushed to get married without a good source of income and he bluntly told me that he had always been broke while he was single and still broke now that he's married the only difference is that he can boast of his kids as an achievement unlike when he was single that he had nothing to boast of.

This Answer Sha very funny.
Children and Marriage is not the cause of anyone not doing well, your will power to achieving your goals. But children and marriage might slow down the rate at which you get them (goals) fulfilled. Most children and wife bring goodluck, in some cases they fasten the rate at which u achieve the goals.

OP what if you never get to build 3bedroom flat and buy a car? You remain single and childless?

There are people who built houses and bought cars after about 4 children, so it depends on the individual resolve to achieving his or her goals

3 Likes

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by verybadmouth(m): 5:20pm On Dec 13, 2021
By OP's standards, only wealthy people should have children and fulfil their dreams of parenting.
God has a plan for everyone. Just live your life and enjoy it while it lasts. If your grandmother was not born, you will not be in existence today. Make Una rest abeg. Who go rich go rich, who go poor go poor. Who go born go born. Laslas everybody go die. Both rich and poor.

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by dfrost: 5:21pm On Dec 13, 2021
MufasaLion:


cry

MufasaLion my brother be claiming down. How did your day run or still running?

1 Like

Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by Awkabigboy: 5:23pm On Dec 13, 2021
Supreme145:
[s]There is this motion that giving birth to children is an achievement in this country. I see young guys in mid and late twenties rushing into marriage while they are barely standing on their feet. From someone that comes from a family of 10 I'm sure if my dad is given a second chance he won't give birth as much children again. Let me share some of my experiences as regards giving birth without proper planning or sustainable income.

I've a neighbor in my compound, he's 32 and in his final year in the university, I can hardly have decent conversation with him without hearing about how he wants to get married. I would always remind him that he's living in a one room apartment, still a student without a strong source of income, but he would counter me saying that he can always start small and grow with his wife. Moreover when he gives birth he would have an investment.

I've have another friend that was a classmate in secondary school, he graduated the year I got admission though he had some issues with his results. One day he called me that he's married and I was surprised, though he is an artisan into all those parapets and pop stuffs I know he wasn't financially buoyant enough to carry a family. The last time I visited him he was looking malnourished and unable to sort out his issues in school almost four years after because according to him any money that he gets already has a pending issue waiting for it. He's looking far older than his elder brother who's still single, he looks 38 when he's just 30. He consoled himself by telling me that even if he doesn't have money he already has two kids which he sees an investment and a great achievement. Meanwhile they are cramped into a single room apartment and none of the kids are enrolled in school.

Last week while we were training in the evening, an argument broke out between two young guys. I was just by the side observing what was happening, I kept hearing stuffs like....why you dey argue with that guy? you no know say na person father he be? that guy don born two children o abi you think say e easy to born, na big achievement be that o. Now this is a guy that is about 25 years and has no sustainable means of income, he works in peoples farms and other menial jobs to make ends meet.

My next door married neighbor has become a torn in my flesh, he's always borrowing from me without paying so it's obvious he's struggling financially, factor in the constant arguments with his wife due to shortage of funds all the time. I once asked him why rushed to get married without a good source of income and he bluntly told me that he had always been broke while he was single and still broke now that he's married the only difference is that he can boast of his kids as an achievement unlike when he was single that he had nothing to boast of.

I have no issues what so ever with how anyone choose to life their life but considering the economic condition of this country now bringing in kids without proper plans is not the way to go. If my dad had given birth to maybe 3 kids I'm sure he wouldn't be stressed out the way he is now and the resources used in training 8 kids would be better managed on just 3kids.

Personally I feel that one of the surest way to perpetual poverty as a young guy is to get married while struggling financially. Like one of the examples above, he cast aside his personal development and aspirations just to cater for his family. Supposing he's still single I'm sure he would have cleared he's outstanding school fees and maybe get his certificate.

Well since I'm still single and still struggling I don't judge anybody, every mallam to his kettle. As for me no marriage till I'm financially stable enough to afford at least 3 bedroom flat, a small car and substantial savings. It would be an abomination for me to bring a child into this world to pass through the kind of life I had growing up.[/s]
Foool , even your university degree isn't an achievement, you're not the one to determine what is an achievement for people, so get lost

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Re: Are Children Really An Achievement?? by verybadmouth(m): 5:23pm On Dec 13, 2021
Having kids whether rich or poor gives you a sense of responsibility. Some poor people are better parents than rich ones. We are creatures just like birds and other animals. We must reproduce. There must be continuity. Reproduction has been there since Adam and eve.

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