BENCHOKCONSULT:


E shock you? That's the system here especially if you are a Christian..it goes goes down to wedding ceremonies

I wasn't shocked, it's just okay so as not to give all to outsiders and the members not having to have a taste of it and you know some members will believe money was embezzled if they do not get.

And for other churches concerning going to events, I have grown up to experience life complexities, if it comes to that no lele. Life goes on... Even my church youth WhatsApp group I don't talk, just read and pass and it seems most of us are same only the admin drop messages, work situations and Nigeria economy is a factor too most times.

kayperry:




You are probably just seein things from a narrow point of view, since its not a hall they rented, invites are bound to be sitted scatter under multiple canopies, if you had consider personality differs you will understand why people personalize table & canopy, my kind of guest might not be your kind of guest, imagine church invitees sitting on table where heinekein, glenfiddich fills the table, regardless of how you feel, class applies and you can't tell me what you will do for close clique is the same you will for mo gbo mo yaa.
If i am coming to your party as a close friend i expect preferential treatment buh not on same table with strangers ..@least lets not rub it in

very Good explainaiton some of there just counter with no thinking

tommy589:


You are right about this,but life comes with surprises. I don't go to parties even if it is in the next building to mine, but I was surprised during my father's burial to see people I did not invite crossed states to be part of it.

they didn't come for you kiddo, they came for your father.

you been hearing about LAST RESPECT right?




now organise your own personal party, let's see if same set of people go cross water for u

KiNg0G:
they didn't come for you kiddo, they came for your father.

you been hearing about LAST RESPECT right?




now organise your own personal party, let's see if same set of people go cross water for u

They don't know my father!

For your mind I be kid

I started mixing with people when I realized I have to bring food to the table, but that part of me that finds happiness to be alone is over 80% there. Sometimes the day of my birth day to celebrate I don't even remember, until when family members brings my attention to it. But in recent years they now organise a small party for me

GraciousGod190:
A Church member invited the masses to his mother's burial ceremony last week Sunday, today when I got there I had to look for his own canopy..to my surprise they were just few persons sitting on his canopy with lots of chairs vacant.

and I came late o, we talking about after 2.48pm

His siblings canopies were filled to the brim, even his uncle's canopies were filled up that they were even coming to collect chairs from his own canopies to theirs for their respective guest. (this guy is the second to senior) I could see the embarrassment on this man face... he was just quiet and moody.

Food he cooked was surplus, nobody to give after sharing for we the church members that came..he had to even give us extra takeaway home because we didn't pass 10...still they are still enough leftovers.

While I was coming home one of the member from the church a very good friend of mine gave me a lift, then he told me Alex...you see why you need to dey mingle with people all around so that when you want to do things people will come.

You can't just put your full mind for people in church or family members...they disappoint you.

As you go people own, na so people go like come your own.

it really touched me, because I might even be worst than this guy, I hardly go out in the day....I don't have friends.. nobody to invite me to party... people in my street don't even know my name..This is really bad I need to change.

So introverts how do you handle stuffs when it comes to parties like this that you can't bypass? With all eyes watching...

We are many oooooo. May God help ooo

Carot:
i pity you

Pity yourself not me.

pocohantas:


I imagined it playing out and laugh almost kill me. You know Nigerians now, they will apologize first, then go on to take as many as possible. Subsequently they wouldn’t even take permission, they go just carry the chair move.

Lmao... I'm just imagining one of his sisters telling her son, oya Junior, go bring 5 chairs come from brother Kunle canopy.

when u dont attend other's parties u dont expect them at urs!

GraciousGod190:
A Church member invited the masses to his mother's burial ceremony last week Sunday, today when I got there I had to look for his own canopy..to my surprise they were just few persons sitting on his canopy with lots of chairs vacant.

and I came late o, we talking about after 2.48pm

His siblings canopies were filled to the brim, even his uncle's canopies were filled up that they were even coming to collect chairs from his own canopies to theirs for their respective guest. (this guy is the second to senior) I could see the embarrassment on this man face... he was just quiet and moody.

Food he cooked was surplus, nobody to give after sharing for we the church members that came..he had to even give us extra takeaway home because we didn't pass 10...still they are still enough leftovers.

While I was coming home one of the member from the church a very good friend of mine gave me a lift, then he told me Alex...you see why you need to dey mingle with people all around so that when you want to do things people will come.

You can't just put your full mind for people in church or family members...they disappoint you.

As you go people own, na so people go like come your own.

it really touched me, because I might even be worst than this guy, I hardly go out in the day....I don't have friends.. nobody to invite me to party... people in my street don't even know my name..This is really bad I need to change.

So introverts how do you handle stuffs when it comes to parties like this that you can't bypass? With all eyes watching...

Allah!, your friend no bad reach
I don't care that much and I'm too irresponsible to want to own a stand and set canopy, let alone invite guests..........the sin of your friend
Me that I'm equally a guest at the funeral
Life is too vain if not for Christ joor

Funny you! Is it the numbers of attendees that would make the dead person go to Heaven or Hell? Him wey cook no no the number of people he invited and people who dey com? Park well and comot for here. Everything na eyes service and make d people see me.

oliverwrites:
How is this a problem? At my wedding I only had 8 invited people, another 4 was sent by my church, and one gave all the way from PH to Lagos uninvited.

And we had over 800 people in advance. Such things don't move some of us, my wedding was the first wedding I attended in my life and I was 30 when I got married.

Not moved one bit.

are you the quiet type

Remag666:
Some people are so private even the people that know them don't know them
No one can fight nature if you're an outspoken person good for you...no change am because of anybody
If you derive strength from being alone....no matter the yabbing no try change cos you'll end up embarrassing yourself

To my fellow introverts in this forum may God give us the strength to stay silent and violent

do you have a girlfriend

Emmanuel30a:
Funny you! Is it the numbers of attendees that would make the dead person go to Heaven or Hell? Him wey cook no no the number of people he invited and people who dey com? Park well and comot for here. Everything na eyes service and make d people see me.

When you see an illiterate, one can easily tell, from their shallow thinking.

Bros try hide yourself small

Enny2013:
Dis almost happened during my wedding if nt for my parents n in-laws. My husband n I were both introverted beings.

jesus! How did you guys meet

Ladycewhy:
Church should be the last people to expect to turn up for you tho.Time and time again ,the so called brothers and sisters in Christ have prove that they don't have each other's back. I would rather join a club than put my hope on church members.

So for introverts, join a club that doubles as osusu ,so that when the time comes they will have your back. Before you add club people and people you know here and there, canopy don full.

are you an introvert

This is so me. I am not alone, I tried to mingle but most of them used me to their advantage, overtime circumstances revealed their true colors. Now I have God, my mum and siblings with a few caring souls. It's more than enough.

Don't be disturbed by that. Mingling is good but it should be limited. I like being private but I still got some real ones that would pull up for me if I wanna organize something. Although, I don't even like parties, so there's no need for their gathering.

I can go months without contacting people. Even my social media accounts are as silent as a grave yard. I'm sure many people don't even know my whereabouts except people in my neighborhood here and I ain't got no friends among them. Crazy![/quote]

God bless you, well said.

izzou:
Lol.

Personally, I won't let anybody emotional trap me into their lifestyles.

I am not the party and events attending guy. When I have an occasion, I don't even want any crowd to attend. The few people I'll invite would show up. That's enough.

I don't even understand the sense in having separate canopies, but that's another issue for another day.

If you don't like it, don't bend because of societal pressures.

Real friends are those who show up in days of trouble, not in attending parties

Klass99:


Do you remember that thread where the ins? One guy like that was dragging the issue with me and making reference to customs recruitment exercise and how people stood till they fainted, the OP is unserious, blah blah blah.

Must everything involve unnecessary stress and strain before it is deemed to be worth it or people are deemed to be strong/resilient? A friend of mine in Naija is currently interviewing with a multinational and she can't stop goshing over how the process is so sweet and seamless.

They schedule interviews for 10-10:30 and by 10:15 they are done. A senior executive failed to meet with her as scheduled yesterday on Microsoft Teams. The guy sent her a mail apologizing and asking if they can connect on whatsapp.

I'm impressed by your comments. However i can't seem to place you somewhere. One moment you sound like an introvert. Another moment you sound like an outspoken introvert or lets say ambivert. Where do you belong? Am confused

Purekween:
God bless you, well said.

you must be an introvert. A boring one at that

Carot:
are you an introvert

Nope

GraciousGod190:
A Church member invited the masses to his mother's burial ceremony last week Sunday, today when I got there I had to look for his own canopy..to my surprise they were just few persons sitting on his canopy with lots of chairs vacant.

and I came late o, we talking about after 2.48pm

His siblings canopies were filled to the brim, even his uncle's canopies were filled up that they were even coming to collect chairs from his own canopies to theirs for their respective guest. (this guy is the second to senior) I could see the embarrassment on this man face... he was just quiet and moody.

Food he cooked was surplus, nobody to give after sharing for we the church members that came..he had to even give us extra takeaway home because we didn't pass 10...still they are still enough leftovers.

While I was coming home one of the member from the church a very good friend of mine gave me a lift, then he told me Alex...you see why you need to dey mingle with people all around so that when you want to do things people will come.

You can't just put your full mind for people in church or family members...they disappoint you.

As you go people own, na so people go like come your own.

it really touched me, because I might even be worst than this guy, I hardly go out in the day....I don't have friends.. nobody to invite me to party... people in my street don't even know my name..This is really bad I need to change.

So introverts how do you handle stuffs when it comes to parties like this that you can't bypass? With all eyes watching...

RUBBISH.
If you are a mice while do burial like an elephant.
If truly you are a Christian what do you need crowd for.
After burial what next or you are not doer of the word.
Me keep waiting for the day I will invite you, you go wait tire.

I don’t know why I have this western life in me when it comes to party, I don’t really like much people attending my party.

Ladycewhy:
Nope

can you date one

Carot:
do you have a girlfriend

Nope never had one don't think I ever will
U?

Carot:
can you date one

Are they not humans? . Introversion is not a disability.

Ishilove:
Lesson learned. Me wey dey avoid mingling, I really gats to start mingling with people and not turn to an Island

You of all people shouldn't buy into this...


Mingling has a lot of disadvantages... Not mingling gives you a lot of peace.

About having enough people on your functions... I don't even care... If I was the said man, I wouldn't even feel a thing.

Infact, if you have money, people will honour you and come to celebrate with you. Money often drags us to mingle with people alot. if the man was rich, the canopy will be filled also.

I believe that if that man had displayed items to be given as souvenirs, people will transfer to his canopy...

Nigerians too like awoof.

Remag666:
Nope never had one don't think I ever will U?

yes. dont you wanna have kids

KiNg0G:

When you see an illiterate, one can easily tell, from their shallow thinking.

Bros try hide yourself small

.... If you want to hide, make sure you dont hide where you can easily slide. What is your pride? Because you have a ride? Are you really a kiddo? Stop making noise!

Carot:
yes. dont you wanna have kids

Sure
I know where you're going okay

.

Klass99:


The phrase over matured made me smile



Bro, I'm female not male but I appreciate the text in bold. You keep being nice too.

You are blessed, proud of you

Carot:
are you the quiet type

I wish I was but I don't like parties. And I don't keep friends as such only few from secondary school days and those were those who attended my wedding.