Alot of answers here are Shallow and trying to paint a perfect picture. Grooming a Child is a task and it comes with different Phase. Someone pointed out a red flag 'mom stop shouting at me' , this is been said by a 7yrs old boy lmao. @op ask yourself if you can dare tell your own mum that when you were 7. Even now that I'm even married if my mum open fire I have to be quite and give way.
I actually don't have the luxury of explaining, but they are certain kind of boldness made for certain age, it becomes scary if a child is quick to learn such, because we all their brains are still young and they definitely don't know how to handle such exposure.
One day he might tell you to shut up In front of friends.
Never you pampar such, when the time is right for him to be bold, you will definitely let him know.
Parents you see beating the living day out off their kids aren't doing so because they hate them, but because they understand this is the stage if you slack ,you have lost them.
I could still remember my growing up, precisely when I was 7, any mess up will be treated with immediate alacrity, mum will make it worse by saying your dad will hear about it, that alone frightens me. But today I found out they are the simplest people one could be with, but as at then their principles first.

brain54:

Old woman...



I trust you to always deliver.

I AM my grandfather’s mother after all.

anoda:
abi? After all nor be millitery grade parents still dey raise courch gobblins whe no fit adjust well to society?

ROFLMAO

Kobojunkie:
Why are you answering the question for me?

And what exactly do you mean by "how much honor do you have for your parents"?

If you don't think twice before referring to people's parents, it may be an offshoot of having no regards for your own parents

Wow!!! A big thanks to everyone that offered their tips on managing my emotion when dealing with him, because that's the major reason I'm here.

I forgot to mention that I called his teacher the next day after he brought the other box home again and she told me the lunch box was in school as the other guy was searching all over for his own the previous day. So, he got it and he was happy to find it ( he didn't leave it intentionally, it was a mistake)

I guess I'm expecting too much from him as a 7 Year old boy. Lol.

Some details were missing and I'm going to chip them in right here.

I used to flog him a lot before, but people advised against it and I resolved to shouting. His dad always leave two canes at home, so it's not a case of sparing the rod.

His father doesn't even have time for talk and shouts, all he does is beating him at every mistake and I'm not cool with it. So, I had to throw the canes away for a while when the beating became too much and he was acting too timid and lost his confidence. I can't watch and let someone kill my child's self-esteem, I believe more in punishment. I experienced same and I'm not ready to let my child go down that road.

I think he just recently gained back his confidence but it's on another level now.

I know shouting is not ideal because I don't like being shouted at too, but the boy's confidence is on another level these days. I guess we'll reintroduce the cane for scare purposes and flog when absolutely necessary.

I read some advises here and I was just shaking my head. See, if you have a child and you think flogging him everyday will make him behave well, you're just deceiving yourself. I learnt this the hard way but I was lucky cos he's still in his formative years.

Back then, kids of 2 years, 1 year, will be beating him (he was 5 then) and he'll be crying. He was scared to stand up for himself. The neighbour's children would bully him and he'd not share with me.

Luckily for me, and him, I work from home. So, everything was glaring and I knew I had to change my parenting style. Hence, my resolve to do more of scolding and less caning. It helped a lot because he improved academically and emotionally too.

Now, we're closer and I'm always the best mum in the world to him ( when I'm not scolding of course...lol). We talk a lot and he doesn't hide things from me ( I always make sure of that).


Now that we're here, I'll take the authoritative style of parenting advice from someone here (thanks a lot!). I'll learn to keep my emotions in check and also deprive him of his toys when the need arises. I will also set rules and try to be as strict as possible.

I read some really fantastic advice here and I truly appreciate them. Thanks for taking time out to do this. God help every parent trying to do things right and raise kids the right way.

Our efforts on them will never be in vain!

mybiz234:
If you don't think twice before referring to people's parents, it may be an offshoot of having no regards for your own parents

I don't have regard for people simply based on titles dem carry for head.... parents are not gods, they are flesh and blood, fallible beings, just like you and every human out there.

So?

Kobojunkie:
I don't have regard for people simply based on titles dem carry for head.... parents are not gods, they are flesh and blood, fallible beings, just like you and every human out there.

So?

Then your parents are worth nothing to you, right?

mybiz234:
Then your parents are worth nothing to you, right?

You and I don't even think alike as far as these things are concerned, so you are wrong to assume these accessments of yours make sense to me existence.

Who am I to exert a worth on any human life that I have no power to create of my own will?

Who am I to declare one human worth more than another human when I can't even imagine even a human cell into existence by my will?

Kobojunkie:
You and I don't even think alike as far as these things are concerned, so you are wrong to assume these accessments of yours make sense to me existence.

Who am I to exert a worth on any human life that I have no power to create of my own will?

Who am I to declare one human worth more than another human when I can't even imagine even a human cell into existence by my will?

Do I need to remind you that you are a creation of your parents? You will never be in existence of your dad didn't impregnate your mom.

Let that sink

Mariangeles:


I AM my grandfather’s mother after all.

Lmao..

Munzy14:

Lmao..

I chiga ochi?
Ihe m wu wu nnennanna ya.
Akwa a gwala’m gi na mbo.

mybiz234:
Do I need to remind you that you are a creation of your parents? You will never be in existence of your dad didn't impregnate your mom.

Let that sink

Again, You and I don't even exist on the same hemisphere as far as these ideas are concerned so I fail to see why you keep trying to shove your views down my throat.

My parents did not create me. Instead they served as vessels through which I was delivered into this here world by the one who is my creator. If my dad had not impregnated my mother, then surely my creator would have seen fit to facilitate other means (carriers even) through which to deliver me to this here world, all His way.

Mariangeles:


I chiga ochi?
Ihe m wu wu nnennanna ya.
Akwa a gwala’m gi na mbo.

Yes..

It is the way that person jiri si old woman you no dey disappoint, and how you twisted his intentions..

That's how to enjoy here sha.

Kobojunkie:
Again, You and I don't even exist on the same hemisphere as far as these ideas are concerned so I fail to see why you keep trying to shove your views down my throat.

My parents did not create me. Instead they served as vessels through which I was delivered into this here world by the one who is my creator. If my dad had not impregnated my mother, then surely my creator would have seen fit to facilitate other means (carriers even) through which to deliver me to this here world, all His way.

Go to lab and check your generic compositions. You will realize that they all came from your two parents.

You are a creation of your parents. Without them, you wouldn't be alive. Those pastors/motivational speakers telling you otherwise are telling you jargons.

You think you know, but unfortunately, you are only been driven by deep seated ignorance

mybiz234:
1. Go to lab and check your generic compositions. You will realize that they all came from your two parents.

You are a creation of your parents. Without them, you wouldn't be alive. Those pastors/motivational speakers telling you otherwise are telling you jargons.

You think you know, but unfortunately, you are only been driven by deep seated ignorance

Again, You and I don't even exist on the same hemisphere as far as these ideas are concerned so I fail to see why you keep trying to shove your views down my throat.

My parents did not create me. Instead they served as vessels through which I was delivered into this here world by the one who is my creator. If my dad had not impregnated my mother, then surely my creator would have seen fit to facilitate other means (carriers even) through which to deliver me to this here world, all His way.

Stop trying to shove your bullsheet down my throat!

Munzy14:

Yes..

It is the way that person jiri si old woman you no dey disappoint, and how you twisted his intentions..

That's how to enjoy here sha.

He didn’t mean it the way you think it.

We’ve joked about it before, that was why I replied him with that. He understands.

Mariangeles:


He didn’t mean it the way you think it.

We’ve joked about it before, that was why I replied him with that. He understands.

Ok...Eche kwa m ma o wu ndi admirers gi juru ebe a..

I don't call them your troll sha

Kobojunkie:

Again, You and I don't even exist on the same hemisphere as far as these ideas are concerned so I fail to see why you keep trying to shove your views down my throat.

My parents did not create me. Instead they served as vessels through which I was delivered into this here world by the one who is my creator. If my dad had not impregnated my mother, then surely my creator would have seen fit to facilitate other means (carriers even) through which to deliver me to this here world, all His way.

Stop trying to shove your bullsheet down my throat!

Forget it. Stop permitting motivational deceptions they told you to take root in your life.

What you don't know is that there wouldn't have been anyone like you if your dad didn't impregnate your mom.

You are a creation of your parents. That's the truth
So, your existence happen because your dad impregnated your mom. Forget all those senseless motivational Rubbisj and face the fact.

mybiz234:
Forget it. Stop permitting motivational deceptions they told you to take root in your life.

What you don't know is that there wouldn't have been anyone like you if your dad didn't impregnate your mom.

You are a creation of your parents. That's the truth
So, your existence happen because your dad impregnated your mom. Forget all those senseless motivational Rubbisj and face the fact.

Again, You and I don't even exist on the same hemisphere as far as these ideas are concerned so I fail to see why you keep trying to shove your views down my throat.

My parents did not create me. Instead they served as vessels through which I was delivered into this here world by the one who is my creator. If my dad had not impregnated my mother, then surely my creator would have seen fit to facilitate other means (carriers even) through which to deliver me to this here world, all His way.

Stop trying to shove your bullsheet down my throat!

Kobojunkie:
Again, You and I don't even exist on the same hemisphere as far as these ideas are concerned so I fail to see why you keep trying to shove your views down my throat.

My parents did not create me. Instead they served as vessels through which I was delivered into this here world by the one who is my creator. If my dad had not impregnated my mother, then surely my creator would have seen fit to facilitate other means (carriers even) through which to deliver me to this here world, all His way.

Stop trying to shove your bullsheet down my throat!

Lolz. You are saying bullshit.

You are a creation of your parents.

You wouldn't be in existence of your dad didn't impregnate your mom.

It's as simple as that

mybiz234:

Lolz. You are saying bullshit.

You are a creation of your parents.

You wouldn't be in existence of your dad didn't impregnate your mom.
It's as simple as that

Again, You and I don't even exist on the same hemisphere as far as these ideas are concerned so I fail to see why you keep trying to shove your views down my throat.

My parents did not create me. Instead they served as vessels through which I was delivered into this here world by the one who is my creator. If my dad had not impregnated my mother, then surely my creator would have seen fit to facilitate other means (carriers even) through which to deliver me to this here world, all His way.

Stop trying to shove your bullsheet down my throat!

Karleb:


If he wants to be assertive about his boundaries, let him get a job and pay his bills.

But if he is under a parent, he has a job and that is to be responsible, else he'll get scolded.

You people need to read the OP, read my comment then read the OP again before sliding in my mention.

I did read OP's comments and yours before mentioning you

A child is dependent on his parents for resources, but that doesn't mean that parents can freely abuse the child anyhow they want

Scolding shows that the parent has anger management issues and ineffective communication skills

Parents who normalize child abuse in the form of psychological, emotional, physical, and verbal abuse are just setting their children up for abusive relationships in adulthood

Children are very very vulnerable. They should be treated delicately, led by example, and disciplined with love not abuse

bepositive11:


I did read OP's comments and yours before mentioning you

A child is dependent on his parents for resources, but that doesn't mean that parents can freely abuse the child anyhow they want

Scolding shows that the parent has anger management issues and ineffective communication skills

Parents who normalize child abuse in the form of psychological, emotional, physical, and verbal abuse are just setting their children up for abusive relationships in adulthood

Children are very very vulnerable. They should be treated delicately, led by example, and disciplined with love not abuse

Do you understand the meaning of scolding?
Do you know why parents scold?

I don't understand why you people are making a big deal out of this.

The whites we are trying to hard to copy still discipline their kids.

If you have a kid, or you teach in primary school, you'd understand that kids are hard to deal with.

Kobojunkie:
Again, You and I don't even exist on the same hemisphere as far as these ideas are concerned so I fail to see why you keep trying to shove your views down my throat.

My parents did not create me. Instead they served as vessels through which I was delivered into this here world by the one who is my creator. If my dad had not impregnated my mother, then surely my creator would have seen fit to facilitate other means (carriers even) through which to deliver me to this here world, all His way.

Stop trying to shove your bullsheet down my throat!

You are a creation of your parents' sexual escapade.

If your parents didn't have sex, you wouldn't be alive today.

Karleb:


Do you understand the meaning of scolding?
Do you know why parents scold?

I don't understand why you people are making a big deal out of this.

The whites we are trying to hard to copy still discipline their kids.

If you have a kid, or you teach in primary school, you'd understand that kids are hard to deal with.

It's not about copying whites, it's about understanding how our actions impact children

I was scolded often as a kid for every little mistake and it really affected my mental health

OP's child was bold enough to communicate how her scolding was impacting his mental health. Other children just bottle it up

If you want to correct a child, you have to be assertive with a penalty based on something they love - if you do this again, no more games, or no more TV, or no more playing with friends, etc.

It's also important to give the reason / explain why it's not good to do it

This is much more effective than scolding them and psychologically wounding them

Anyway, let's not let this drag. Have a good day

Karleb:
For your child to say you should stop shouting at him actually shows disrespect.

Correct that!

It depends on how they say it. If they say stop then it's disrespectful.

If they say mummy I don't like when you shout at me I don't think it's disrespectful.

Rubbiish:
What of the dad?
Male children don't fear mothers naturally

Seriously
I completely disagree with you.
I have 3 boys and I know what I know

Rubbiish:
What of the dad?
Male children don't fear mothers naturally

na lie oooo