| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by Mooh247: 9:36am On Mar 09, 2022 |
You are doing great, don't let that boy emotionally manipulate you... You are only doing your job correcting him |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by sammirano: 9:37am On Mar 09, 2022 |
So sad. You are apologizing to your son for solding him. Its you people that are causing the problems in society today. 1 Like |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by justking(m): 9:37am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Pray and ask God to guide you. He alone has the solution, not nairaland. |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by zabuur: 9:39am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Teettyllayho:
Please I need advise from people with grown up kids.
Honestly, parenting is not easy. I don't even know what to do anymore.
My first son is 7 but he is kind of slow. However, he's above average in learning and he's learning at his pace. I understand all of this and I'm always happy to guide him.
But I don't know if I'm too hard or too soft on him because I use to talk to him a lot. I only beat him when he does something serious (like going against my rules, or not doing his homework when he should).
These days, whenever I scold him, he would give me a sad look and he might even shout saying: "I've heard you!" Then, he will be alone in a corner for some time.
Sometimes, I'd go close to him and tell him why I had to scold him and he'd say "I don't like it when you shout at me" I'd apologize and hug him (I don't even know if I'm spoiling him by apologizing). .
I don't know how to scold without putting a bit of action at least. Shey I'll be whispering and scolding ni? Sometimes, I'll leave him and pretend as if I didn't see him when he brings up such attitude.
Last week, he mistakenly brought back someone else's lunch box home because they look very much alike. I told him it's okay that it happens and I promised to write his name in bold when he brings back his box the next day to prevent such from happening again.
Could you believe that he came back with the other person's lunch box again? When I asked him, he said he didn't see his lunch box and the boy that took his own. Then I asked: Did you tell your class teacher? Are you sure you know the boy?
His reply: I didn't tell my teacher because I know the boy and I went to his class but he wasn't there.
So, I figured that he must have gone to check once and didn't bother to check again. And he didn't bother to also tell his class teacher.
So, I was very mad this time and told him not to bring someone else's property home again, no matter what!
I think he would have told his teacher if he really valued his property because he told me something that made me really mad the next morning.
"Mummy, or will you buy me another lunch box since we can't find mine?" Luckily for me, he was brushing his teeth then and I was bathing for his sister. The resounding slap I gave him on his back brought back his senses.
I don't know why he always want something new. He spoilt the lunch box I bought for him and his sister o and he's using another one now. That is, he wants me to buy a third one while his sister is still using the first one? How na?
I don't even know what to think. Why would he want a new box when he's barely used the new one?
Then, he's always talking about how his classmates use to bring different kinds of food ( he wasn't like this before o).
I try as much as possible to make different foods for him too, and he's stopped complaining.
We recently changed his school and his new school has quite a lot of pupils. I Don't know if that's affecting him.
Honestly, I'm bothered about the changes and I don't know how best to address it.
I've made him understand countless times that he should always be content with whatever he has and he shouldn't compare himself with anyone.
I just finished with another round of lecture now and he has tears in his eyes saying:
"Mummy, stop shouting at me. It makes me sad"
I was heartbroken and felt guilty seeing him like this and I did everything possible to make him see why I had to shout or scold.
Please how can I scold a child without shouting? Am I spoiling him? Can someone help with tips?
Honestly, I'm tired!
My son is 6 and he's like that as well. Only that he can apologize till heaven falls. I'm sorry, I won't do that again. I'm a bad boy. But I won't do that again. Just keep trying. He'll understand later |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by nwanyiugbo122(f): 9:39am On Mar 09, 2022 |
You are using oyibo style of parenting on that boy. We are Africans,w do not take nonsense from our own kids. He is using his own mechanism to make u apologise to him and you always fall for it. The day you start ignoring that attitude, he will stop the rubbish, how dare you tell me how to scold you, the volume of my voice? You see that lunch pack if its my son, you must provide it. Please don't be too soft, he will take advantage of it. |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by TheGiftedOne(m): 9:39am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Young man is challenging you because his dad is not around. He'll fear his father more....kids just need their dad to assure them of his protection and care and at the same time that stern manly warning and discipline. Dude for don fold him tail keep for knickers 
|
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by Nobody: 9:40am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Your child has figured out a way to manipulate you for being too soft.
Don't withhold discipline from a child.
Beat him if he does something that deserves a beating, and advise him when you think advice is enough. |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by Kavod: 9:40am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Teettyllayho:
Please I need advise from people with grown up kids.
Honestly, parenting is not easy. I don't even know what to do anymore.
My first son is 7 but he is kind of slow. However, he's above average in learning and he's learning at his pace. I understand all of this and I'm always happy to guide him.
But I don't know if I'm too hard or too soft on him because I use to talk to him a lot. I only beat him when he does something serious (like going against my rules, or not doing his homework when he should).
These days, whenever I scold him, he would give me a sad look and he might even shout saying: "I've heard you!" Then, he will be alone in a corner for some time.
Sometimes, I'd go close to him and tell him why I had to scold him and he'd say "I don't like it when you shout at me" I'd apologize and hug him (I don't even know if I'm spoiling him by apologizing). .
I don't know how to scold without putting a bit of action at least. Shey I'll be whispering and scolding ni? Sometimes, I'll leave him and pretend as if I didn't see him when he brings up such attitude.
Last week, he mistakenly brought back someone else's lunch box home because they look very much alike. I told him it's okay that it happens and I promised to write his name in bold when he brings back his box the next day to prevent such from happening again.
Could you believe that he came back with the other person's lunch box again? When I asked him, he said he didn't see his lunch box and the boy that took his own. Then I asked: Did you tell your class teacher? Are you sure you know the boy?
His reply: I didn't tell my teacher because I know the boy and I went to his class but he wasn't there.
So, I figured that he must have gone to check once and didn't bother to check again. And he didn't bother to also tell his class teacher.
So, I was very mad this time and told him not to bring someone else's property home again, no matter what!
I think he would have told his teacher if he really valued his property because he told me something that made me really mad the next morning.
"Mummy, or will you buy me another lunch box since we can't find mine?" Luckily for me, he was brushing his teeth then and I was bathing for his sister. The resounding slap I gave him on his back brought back his senses.
I don't know why he always want something new. He spoilt the lunch box I bought for him and his sister o and he's using another one now. That is, he wants me to buy a third one while his sister is still using the first one? How na?
I don't even know what to think. Why would he want a new box when he's barely used the new one?
Then, he's always talking about how his classmates use to bring different kinds of food ( he wasn't like this before o).
I try as much as possible to make different foods for him too, and he's stopped complaining.
We recently changed his school and his new school has quite a lot of pupils. I Don't know if that's affecting him.
Honestly, I'm bothered about the changes and I don't know how best to address it.
I've made him understand countless times that he should always be content with whatever he has and he shouldn't compare himself with anyone.
I just finished with another round of lecture now and he has tears in his eyes saying:
"Mummy, stop shouting at me. It makes me sad"
I was heartbroken and felt guilty seeing him like this and I did everything possible to make him see why I had to shout or scold.
Please how can I scold a child without shouting? Am I spoiling him? Can someone help with tips?
Honestly, I'm tired!
Guy at 7 years old? Hmmmmn my guy enh I get 11 year old son. I de always give am 2 warnings but if the guy do am the third time.. Skin must peel oooo. My Son go do wrong and I shout for am, e go squeeze face or speak back. IMPORCICANT.... That's e run go baff then either read book or sleep. If you de tolerate this at 7 then be best prepared to get really physical with him at 17-22 years 1 Like |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by SugarGirl44(f): 9:41am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Teettyllayho:
Hmm. Is this true? Male children don't fear their mothers?
Dad comes around during weekends. Very true. The other day my sister asked why my 7yo nephew why he only gets serious when his dad is around but plays too much when he's not, and he said 'it's because I'm scared of dad but you're my babygirl' in a funny way. I think it's just natural. |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by ahnie: 9:41am On Mar 09, 2022 |
thatsleepboy1:
Ahnie to the rescue here. Hian make i no talk. Good morning your highness,you called me. |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by Buffalo2(m): 9:41am On Mar 09, 2022 |
You must have allowed some things to pass when he was at a tender age hence the recent show he is putting up. Well you can still bend her you just have to stand you ground irrespective of her whatever. |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by Babaheekmat: 9:41am On Mar 09, 2022 |
After talking to him and no changes..
Change to beating.
If talking to him no give him sense
Beating will |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by streetsoldier1(m): 9:42am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Teettyllayho:
Please I need advise from people with grown up kids.
Honestly, parenting is not easy. I don't even know what to do anymore.
My first son is 7 but he is kind of slow. However, he's above average in learning and he's learning at his pace. I understand all of this and I'm always happy to guide him.
But I don't know if I'm too hard or too soft on him because I use to talk to him a lot. I only beat him when he does something serious (like going against my rules, or not doing his homework when he should).
These days, whenever I scold him, he would give me a sad look and he might even shout saying: "I've heard you!" Then, he will be alone in a corner for some time.
Sometimes, I'd go close to him and tell him why I had to scold him and he'd say "I don't like it when you shout at me" I'd apologize and hug him (I don't even know if I'm spoiling him by apologizing). .
I don't know how to scold without putting a bit of action at least. Shey I'll be whispering and scolding ni? Sometimes, I'll leave him and pretend as if I didn't see him when he brings up such attitude.
Last week, he mistakenly brought back someone else's lunch box home because they look very much alike. I told him it's okay that it happens and I promised to write his name in bold when he brings back his box the next day to prevent such from happening again.
Could you believe that he came back with the other person's lunch box again? When I asked him, he said he didn't see his lunch box and the boy that took his own. Then I asked: Did you tell your class teacher? Are you sure you know the boy?
His reply: I didn't tell my teacher because I know the boy and I went to his class but he wasn't there.
So, I figured that he must have gone to check once and didn't bother to check again. And he didn't bother to also tell his class teacher.
So, I was very mad this time and told him not to bring someone else's property home again, no matter what!
I think he would have told his teacher if he really valued his property because he told me something that made me really mad the next morning.
"Mummy, or will you buy me another lunch box since we can't find mine?" Luckily for me, he was brushing his teeth then and I was bathing for his sister. The resounding slap I gave him on his back brought back his senses.
I don't know why he always want something new. He spoilt the lunch box I bought for him and his sister o and he's using another one now. That is, he wants me to buy a third one while his sister is still using the first one? How na?
I don't even know what to think. Why would he want a new box when he's barely used the new one?
Then, he's always talking about how his classmates use to bring different kinds of food ( he wasn't like this before o).
I try as much as possible to make different foods for him too, and he's stopped complaining.
We recently changed his school and his new school has quite a lot of pupils. I Don't know if that's affecting him.
Honestly, I'm bothered about the changes and I don't know how best to address it.
I've made him understand countless times that he should always be content with whatever he has and he shouldn't compare himself with anyone.
I just finished with another round of lecture now and he has tears in his eyes saying:
"Mummy, stop shouting at me. It makes me sad"
I was heartbroken and felt guilty seeing him like this and I did everything possible to make him see why I had to shout or scold.
Please how can I scold a child without shouting? Am I spoiling him? Can someone help with tips?
Honestly, I'm tired!
using cane is scolding without shouting |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by opera1(m): 9:42am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Talk to him, Moderate shout and cane if possible.
Train up a child in a way he should go and when he's old, he will not depart from it. |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by Obasempiree(m): 9:43am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Teettyllayho:
Please I need advise from people with grown up kids.
Honestly, parenting is not easy. I don't even know what to do anymore.
My first son is 7 but he is kind of slow. However, he's above average in learning and he's learning at his pace. I understand all of this and I'm always happy to guide him.
But I don't know if I'm too hard or too soft on him because I use to talk to him a lot. I only beat him when he does something serious (like going against my rules, or not doing his homework when he should).
These days, whenever I scold him, he would give me a sad look and he might even shout saying: "I've heard you!" Then, he will be alone in a corner for some time.
Sometimes, I'd go close to him and tell him why I had to scold him and he'd say "I don't like it when you shout at me" I'd apologize and hug him (I don't even know if I'm spoiling him by apologizing). .
I don't know how to scold without putting a bit of action at least. Shey I'll be whispering and scolding ni? Sometimes, I'll leave him and pretend as if I didn't see him when he brings up such attitude.
Last week, he mistakenly brought back someone else's lunch box home because they look very much alike. I told him it's okay that it happens and I promised to write his name in bold when he brings back his box the next day to prevent such from happening again.
Could you believe that he came back with the other person's lunch box again? When I asked him, he said he didn't see his lunch box and the boy that took his own. Then I asked: Did you tell your class teacher? Are you sure you know the boy?
His reply: I didn't tell my teacher because I know the boy and I went to his class but he wasn't there.
So, I figured that he must have gone to check once and didn't bother to check again. And he didn't bother to also tell his class teacher.
So, I was very mad this time and told him not to bring someone else's property home again, no matter what!
I think he would have told his teacher if he really valued his property because he told me something that made me really mad the next morning.
"Mummy, or will you buy me another lunch box since we can't find mine?" Luckily for me, he was brushing his teeth then and I was bathing for his sister. The resounding slap I gave him on his back brought back his senses.
I don't know why he always want something new. He spoilt the lunch box I bought for him and his sister o and he's using another one now. That is, he wants me to buy a third one while his sister is still using the first one? How na?
I don't even know what to think. Why would he want a new box when he's barely used the new one?
Then, he's always talking about how his classmates use to bring different kinds of food ( he wasn't like this before o).
I try as much as possible to make different foods for him too, and he's stopped complaining.
We recently changed his school and his new school has quite a lot of pupils. I Don't know if that's affecting him.
Honestly, I'm bothered about the changes and I don't know how best to address it.
I've made him understand countless times that he should always be content with whatever he has and he shouldn't compare himself with anyone.
I just finished with another round of lecture now and he has tears in his eyes saying:
"Mummy, stop shouting at me. It makes me sad"
I was heartbroken and felt guilty seeing him like this and I did everything possible to make him see why I had to shout or scold.
Please how can I scold a child without shouting? Am I spoiling him? Can someone help with tips?
Honestly, I'm tired!
how to boost online sales? read here https://ndiokjnr.com/four-ways-to-boost-sales-through-online-visibility/ |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by kumulus(m): 9:43am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Dear Teettyllayho,
You really should stop abusing and disrespecting his person by shouting at him! (Just because he's yet a child, albeit physically)
You did well by talking to him, he's a human like yourself and at 7 he's capable of reasoning. Create and give incentives when he follows your admonitions, imagine if you'd told home you'd get him some candy/chocolate, a book or another toy if/when he brings back the original lunch box. He would have done everything to make sure he brought it home and wouldn't be nonchalant about it as you suggested. (Doing this continuously would build in him over time sound character, he will grow up knowing there's always some good reward for putting in the right effort)
Now he asked IF (he wasn't even demanding you do) you will buy him a new one instead, rather than say yes/no (if possible with the reason you won't), you went on to deal him a slap. How will he ever trust to be real/honest with you again?? That morning experience just handed him one more lock for his lips, now you watch him recede farther into that one corner if you don't take initiative to right this wrong.
Parents and gaurdians should stop ruining the mental fabric of their wards!!!!
Develop sound communication with your children, hear then out and respond accordingly. Reproving a child doesn't necessarily mean being harsh, the wise teaching says to correct in love. Anger and frustration aren't love, I'm sure you'll agree. 1 Like |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by Aidejay(m): 9:43am On Mar 09, 2022 |
In situations like this I think about what my mom will do, and do the opposite.
Next time when he says you're making him sad remind him his behavior is making you sad and angry. Let him know how you feel, hammer it. He should understand you also have feelings.
It's obvious being in a new school and environment is changing his view, you can't stop that.
But you can stemm it by ensuring he takes care of everything he is given and owns. Having a sense of pride and responsibility for what you have will help manage the feelings of jealousy or desire to have what other people have.
A practical exercise you can engage him in is taking him to the market and involving him in the buying and acquiring part of getting those things. |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by LordIsaac(m): 9:43am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Run to a bookstore and buy "Dare to Discipline," by James Dobson, and thank me later. |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by deavicky(m): 9:44am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Teettyllayho:
Please I need advise from people with grown up kids.
Honestly, parenting is not easy. I don't even know what to do anymore.
My first son is 7 but he is kind of slow. However, he's above average in learning and he's learning at his pace. I understand all of this and I'm always happy to guide him.
But I don't know if I'm too hard or too soft on him because I use to talk to him a lot. I only beat him when he does something serious (like going against my rules, or not doing his homework when he should).
These days, whenever I scold him, he would give me a sad look and he might even shout saying: "I've heard you!" Then, he will be alone in a corner for some time.
Sometimes, I'd go close to him and tell him why I had to scold him and he'd say "I don't like it when you shout at me" I'd apologize and hug him (I don't even know if I'm spoiling him by apologizing). .
I don't know how to scold without putting a bit of action at least. Shey I'll be whispering and scolding ni? Sometimes, I'll leave him and pretend as if I didn't see him when he brings up such attitude.
Last week, he mistakenly brought back someone else's lunch box home because they look very much alike. I told him it's okay that it happens and I promised to write his name in bold when he brings back his box the next day to prevent such from happening again.
Could you believe that he came back with the other person's lunch box again? When I asked him, he said he didn't see his lunch box and the boy that took his own. Then I asked: Did you tell your class teacher? Are you sure you know the boy?
His reply: I didn't tell my teacher because I know the boy and I went to his class but he wasn't there.
So, I figured that he must have gone to check once and didn't bother to check again. And he didn't bother to also tell his class teacher.
So, I was very mad this time and told him not to bring someone else's property home again, no matter what!
I think he would have told his teacher if he really valued his property because he told me something that made me really mad the next morning.
"Mummy, or will you buy me another lunch box since we can't find mine?" Luckily for me, he was brushing his teeth then and I was bathing for his sister. The resounding slap I gave him on his back brought back his senses.
I don't know why he always want something new. He spoilt the lunch box I bought for him and his sister o and he's using another one now. That is, he wants me to buy a third one while his sister is still using the first one? How na?
I don't even know what to think. Why would he want a new box when he's barely used the new one?
Then, he's always talking about how his classmates use to bring different kinds of food ( he wasn't like this before o).
I try as much as possible to make different foods for him too, and he's stopped complaining.
We recently changed his school and his new school has quite a lot of pupils. I Don't know if that's affecting him.
Honestly, I'm bothered about the changes and I don't know how best to address it.
I've made him understand countless times that he should always be content with whatever he has and he shouldn't compare himself with anyone.
I just finished with another round of lecture now and he has tears in his eyes saying:
"Mummy, stop shouting at me. It makes me sad"
I was heartbroken and felt guilty seeing him like this and I did everything possible to make him see why I had to shout or scold.
Please how can I scold a child without shouting? Am I spoiling him? Can someone help with tips?
Honestly, I'm tired!
where is his father?. |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by DEADALIVE: 9:44am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Rule 1... Never Allow your children grow up with the mentality that everything is readily available...
Rule 2.... For every misbehaviour reduce their chilling and add more task e.g if by weekends they enjoy themselves and watch alot of cartoons, then that weekend will be alot of reading and sleeping. Grounded.
Rule 3... Always inspect them when ever you are around and ask them questions to find out their perception to change... it will guide you in discipline them.
Rule 4....never beat a child with dangerous materials no matter the issue committed. Instead use disciplinary methods.
Rule5....don't be to hard and difficult, be free so that they can reveal things to you...i mean gossip with u.
Most important! Teach your children how to survive the street and Nigeria as they grow up!
My wife brings up my children in a butty way, as for me i always tell my children chocolate de your head, ogbeni leave there, all aboki with im kettle....so they are growing tk understand that papa too is rugged and dont mess with him.
Having to grow and play with children is fun.
God bless all parents in thisASH country Nigeria. 1 Like |
|
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by asto70: 9:44am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Teettyllayho:
Please I need advise from people with grown up kids.
Honestly, parenting is not easy. I don't even know what to do anymore.
My first son is 7 but he is kind of slow. However, he's above average in learning and he's learning at his pace. I understand all of this and I'm always happy to guide him.
But I don't know if I'm too hard or too soft on him because I use to talk to him a lot. I only beat him when he does something serious (like going against my rules, or not doing his homework when he should).
These days, whenever I scold him, he would give me a sad look and he might even shout saying: "I've heard you!" Then, he will be alone in a corner for some time.
Sometimes, I'd go close to him and tell him why I had to scold him and he'd say "I don't like it when you shout at me" I'd apologize and hug him (I don't even know if I'm spoiling him by apologizing). .
I don't know how to scold without putting a bit of action at least. Shey I'll be whispering and scolding ni? Sometimes, I'll leave him and pretend as if I didn't see him when he brings up such attitude.
Last week, he mistakenly brought back someone else's lunch box home because they look very much alike. I told him it's okay that it happens and I promised to write his name in bold when he brings back his box the next day to prevent such from happening again.
Could you believe that he came back with the other person's lunch box again? When I asked him, he said he didn't see his lunch box and the boy that took his own. Then I asked: Did you tell your class teacher? Are you sure you know the boy?
His reply: I didn't tell my teacher because I know the boy and I went to his class but he wasn't there.
So, I figured that he must have gone to check once and didn't bother to check again. And he didn't bother to also tell his class teacher.
So, I was very mad this time and told him not to bring someone else's property home again, no matter what!
I think he would have told his teacher if he really valued his property because he told me something that made me really mad the next morning.
"Mummy, or will you buy me another lunch box since we can't find mine?" Luckily for me, he was brushing his teeth then and I was bathing for his sister. The resounding slap I gave him on his back brought back his senses.
I don't know why he always want something new. He spoilt the lunch box I bought for him and his sister o and he's using another one now. That is, he wants me to buy a third one while his sister is still using the first one? How na?
I don't even know what to think. Why would he want a new box when he's barely used the new one?
Then, he's always talking about how his classmates use to bring different kinds of food ( he wasn't like this before o).
I try as much as possible to make different foods for him too, and he's stopped complaining.
We recently changed his school and his new school has quite a lot of pupils. I Don't know if that's affecting him.
Honestly, I'm bothered about the changes and I don't know how best to address it.
I've made him understand countless times that he should always be content with whatever he has and he shouldn't compare himself with anyone.
I just finished with another round of lecture now and he has tears in his eyes saying:
"Mummy, stop shouting at me. It makes me sad"
I was heartbroken and felt guilty seeing him like this and I did everything possible to make him see why I had to shout or scold.
Please how can I scold a child without shouting? Am I spoiling him? Can someone help with tips?
Honestly, I'm tired!
you are not spoiling him at all but you need to make him understand that whatever you are able to provide is what he should make use of ,rebuke him when he destroy anything and make sure you don't buy another lunch bag for him ,follow him to school or sendvmessage |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by DeepSight(m): 9:44am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Kobojunkie:
Wrong! 
If your shouts are causing him anxieties, he has a right to let you know. You both then need to work on an arrangement that limits the Shouting and gives you both piece of mind. For a person who believes that he/ she owes his/her parents nothing, you're one to speak on this subject. You'd better shut your lousy trap and stay away from a subject such as this since you have no appreciation for the work of parenthood. 1 Like |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by INDUSTRIALFAN(m): 9:45am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Rubbiish:
What of the dad?
Male children don't fear mothers naturally
lmao…. You most likely never have met some families. Na my mumcie we fear pass growing up. |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by valentineuwakwe(m): 9:45am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Una don over pamper that child since he was about 5 years till now....stop it before you will regret it in furture...why would a child shout back at you wen you scold him for doing something wrong? Yet he still does soemthing wrong again n dnt expect to be corrected or shouted upon...remember spare the rod n spoil the child....
The mother should play key role here..let her have a heart to heart talk with her son n let her educate her on morals....you can check on his friends of late n ask questions..... |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by greatseed: 9:46am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Teettyllayho:
Please I need advise from people with grown up kids.
Honestly, parenting is not easy. I don't even know what to do anymore.
My first son is 7 but he is kind of slow. However, he's above average in learning and he's learning at his pace. I understand all of this and I'm always happy to guide him.
But I don't know if I'm too hard or too soft on him because I use to talk to him a lot. I only beat him when he does something serious (like going against my rules, or not doing his homework when he should).
These days, whenever I scold him, he would give me a sad look and he might even shout saying: "I've heard you!" Then, he will be alone in a corner for some time.
Sometimes, I'd go close to him and tell him why I had to scold him and he'd say "I don't like it when you shout at me" I'd apologize and hug him (I don't even know if I'm spoiling him by apologizing). .
I don't know how to scold without putting a bit of action at least. Shey I'll be whispering and scolding ni? Sometimes, I'll leave him and pretend as if I didn't see him when he brings up such attitude.
Last week, he mistakenly brought back someone else's lunch box home because they look very much alike. I told him it's okay that it happens and I promised to write his name in bold when he brings back his box the next day to prevent such from happening again.
Could you believe that he came back with the other person's lunch box again? When I asked him, he said he didn't see his lunch box and the boy that took his own. Then I asked: Did you tell your class teacher? Are you sure you know the boy?
His reply: I didn't tell my teacher because I know the boy and I went to his class but he wasn't there.
So, I figured that he must have gone to check once and didn't bother to check again. And he didn't bother to also tell his class teacher.
So, I was very mad this time and told him not to bring someone else's property home again, no matter what!
I think he would have told his teacher if he really valued his property because he told me something that made me really mad the next morning.
"Mummy, or will you buy me another lunch box since we can't find mine?" Luckily for me, he was brushing his teeth then and I was bathing for his sister. The resounding slap I gave him on his back brought back his senses.
I don't know why he always want something new. He spoilt the lunch box I bought for him and his sister o and he's using another one now. That is, he wants me to buy a third one while his sister is still using the first one? How na?
I don't even know what to think. Why would he want a new box when he's barely used the new one?
Then, he's always talking about how his classmates use to bring different kinds of food ( he wasn't like this before o).
I try as much as possible to make different foods for him too, and he's stopped complaining.
We recently changed his school and his new school has quite a lot of pupils. I Don't know if that's affecting him.
Honestly, I'm bothered about the changes and I don't know how best to address it.
I've made him understand countless times that he should always be content with whatever he has and he shouldn't compare himself with anyone.
I just finished with another round of lecture now and he has tears in his eyes saying:
"Mummy, stop shouting at me. It makes me sad"
I was heartbroken and felt guilty seeing him like this and I did everything possible to make him see why I had to shout or scold.
Please how can I scold a child without shouting? Am I spoiling him? Can someone help with tips?
Honestly, I'm tired! Now that he is still in his teenage age, don't think twice by sparing the rod. At the same time, don't let your emotions & love for him stop you from monitoring him, whenever you are convinced in your inner mind that he is doing something that is not right. Sorry, may I ask where is his father? He has big roles to play in this regards, but if he is not around, you have to learn to play both roles. Spare the rod & spoil the child.
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| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by conscienceman4(m): 9:46am On Mar 09, 2022 |
We recently changed his school and his new school has quite a lot of pupils. I Don't know if that's affecting him.☝️THAT IS THE ROOT OF YOUR PROBLEMS. YOUR CHILD IS PASSING THROUGH A LOT AT THE NEW SCHOOL. BULLYING AND BULLYING OTHERS TRYING TO SURVIVE THE SYSTEM. TAKE HIM OUT OF THAT SCHOOL BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE.Teettyllayho:
Please I need advise from people with grown up kids.
Honestly, parenting is not easy. I don't even know what to do anymore.
My first son is 7 but he is kind of slow. However, he's above average in learning and he's learning at his pace. I understand all of this and I'm always happy to guide him.
But I don't know if I'm too hard or too soft on him because I use to talk to him a lot. I only beat him when he does something serious (like going against my rules, or not doing his homework when he should).
These days, whenever I scold him, he would give me a sad look and he might even shout saying: "I've heard you!" Then, he will be alone in a corner for some time.
Sometimes, I'd go close to him and tell him why I had to scold him and he'd say "I don't like it when you shout at me" I'd apologize and hug him (I don't even know if I'm spoiling him by apologizing). .
I don't know how to scold without putting a bit of action at least. Shey I'll be whispering and scolding ni? Sometimes, I'll leave him and pretend as if I didn't see him when he brings up such attitude.
Last week, he mistakenly brought back someone else's lunch box home because they look very much alike. I told him it's okay that it happens and I promised to write his name in bold when he brings back his box the next day to prevent such from happening again.
Could you believe that he came back with the other person's lunch box again? When I asked him, he said he didn't see his lunch box and the boy that took his own. Then I asked: Did you tell your class teacher? Are you sure you know the boy?
His reply: I didn't tell my teacher because I know the boy and I went to his class but he wasn't there.
So, I figured that he must have gone to check once and didn't bother to check again. And he didn't bother to also tell his class teacher.
So, I was very mad this time and told him not to bring someone else's property home again, no matter what!
I think he would have told his teacher if he really valued his property because he told me something that made me really mad the next morning.
"Mummy, or will you buy me another lunch box since we can't find mine?" Luckily for me, he was brushing his teeth then and I was bathing for his sister. The resounding slap I gave him on his back brought back his senses.
I don't know why he always want something new. He spoilt the lunch box I bought for him and his sister o and he's using another one now. That is, he wants me to buy a third one while his sister is still using the first one? How na?
I don't even know what to think. Why would he want a new box when he's barely used the new one?
Then, he's always talking about how his classmates use to bring different kinds of food ( he wasn't like this before o).
I try as much as possible to make different foods for him too, and he's stopped complaining.
We recently changed his school and his new school has quite a lot of pupils. I Don't know if that's affecting him.
Honestly, I'm bothered about the changes and I don't know how best to address it.
I've made him understand countless times that he should always be content with whatever he has and he shouldn't compare himself with anyone.
I just finished with another round of lecture now and he has tears in his eyes saying:
"Mummy, stop shouting at me. It makes me sad"
I was heartbroken and felt guilty seeing him like this and I did everything possible to make him see why I had to shout or scold.
Please how can I scold a child without shouting? Am I spoiling him? Can someone help with tips?
Honestly, I'm tired!
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| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by Dada4me: 9:46am On Mar 09, 2022 |
You need to be firm and let him know he must listen and obey you. It's also not a good sign for your child to protest against correction by hanging in a corner. He's simply saying the correction is not taken. Tame him now that you can. 1 Like |
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| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by kobarney(m): 9:49am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Karleb:
Stay there and be forming woke.
If the mother is angry, do you expect her to talk softly?
Work on an agreement with a 7yr old, wtf are you saying?
Can the kid say that to his teacher?
Exactly @ bolded. Mhenn this is a fact. He won’t. |
| Re: Am I Spoiling My 7-year Old Son? by asahnwaKC: 9:49am On Mar 09, 2022 |
Madam that’s the parenting you are already doing... it’s not bed of roses.. keep trying he will outgrow that phase... I think you are doing well... also include punishment... like for doing this you won’t have chocolate or something he loves for the week... keep up. |
