My Brother got gainfully employed mid 2021 due to the efforts of my parents. He had been struggling with a 10k job since he finished service before he got this well paying job. Everything was going well as he started well at his working place and was even getting applauded by his boss and higher ranking staffs as he was taken as someone of great promise. He was also in good times with my parents.

Around November last year, he sighted this chubby fine girl and became restless. He even said "she is the one". He hustled for the girl's number and soon started something with her. She accepted his proposal the moment he asked. Our Dad told him it was too early for all that and he needed to focus on building his still budding career but he turned a deaf ear. He soon started lavishing funds on the girl to my parents consternation. He even started discussing intimate details about our family with the girl within a short frame of time. Around January this year, Matters came to a head and started being utterly disrespectful to our parents. He even cut off Everyone that tried to advice him on the folly of the "relationship". He basically became a stranger to the family and his friends all because of a girl. The girl was so demanding, Manipulative and infuriating. The worst is that the girl was a serial girlfriend, having dated at least 8 men before him. She was a so called Dj and her whole life was all about parties and fleshpots. My brother on the other hand came from a strict Christian family and abandoned all the values he identified with because of the girl. The only thing he got from the relationship was premium billing.


The Crux of the matter now is that he went bankrupt trying to fund her extravagant lifestyle and even went into debts. He borrowed money from 7 different loan apps and they have been on his neck. We have been able to handle 3 of the loans and some of the remaining loan companies are even threatening to post his photos on social media and Newspapers as a fraudster and also blacklist his bvn.

He has been getting troubling phone calls from the loan apps and is basically ruined both mentally and physically. He looks so lean this days and has become humble to my parents and even to me his younger brother. The family he rejected and refused to even give one Kobo in his heydays is now trying by all possible means to rescue him from the slump as we are his only backbone . The girl in question does not even know what he is going through.

How do we rescue the foolish young man as he still isn't ready to fully give up the girl. A friend told him he can't even help him get back on his feet because it will be like pouring water into a leaking bucket. While I was at school this dude hardly sent me or my younger ones anything but was sending a sizeable amount to the girl monthly because he was "in love". I really need helpful suggestions from the house on this matter. Mods help me get this to fp

Ha

Interesting

H0rny men are half sensible.

His so called " the one" is the girl that met his fantasy physically ( probably the backside or the b00bs).


A man who is h0rny will easily part from his money.–Dpsychologist


Men need to learn self control.

When men get Hot they spend recklessly on women.

The illusion of sex can sometimes be greater than the sex itself. Whether the man ends up getting sex or not that's not the crux of the matter.

A man can do anything when he is Hot. This is the bane of many simps.

A man with sexual control is an Alpha among men.

Men, Exercise self control.

I know you are telling lies ... but continue

A prodigal son will from his mistakes

Will Smith na your brother's mentor

Please allow your brother learn his lessons!

From what I've seen so far in Nigeria, and as a Nigeria, I think living in Nigeria should be added to my CV as a qualification.

Some still neva get sense.

LaPrimero:
My Brother got gainfully employed mid 2021 due to the efforts of my parents. He had been struggling with a 10k job since he finished service before he got this well paying job. Everything was going well as he started well at his working place and was even getting applauded by his boss and higher ranking staffs as he was taken as someone of great promise. He was also in good times with my parents.

Around November last year, he sighted this chubby fine girl and became restless. He even said "she is the one". He hustled for the girl's number and soon started something with her. She accepted his proposal the moment he asked. Our Dad told him it was too early for all that and he needed to focus on building his still budding career but he turned a deaf ear. He soon started lavishing funds on the girl to my parents consternation. He even started discussing intimate details about our family with the girl within a short frame of time. Around January this year, Matters came to a head and started being utterly disrespectful to our parents. He even cut off Everyone that tried to advice him on the folly of the "relationship". He basically became a stranger to the family and his friends all because of a girl. The girl was so demanding, Manipulative and infuriating. The worst is that the girl was a serial girlfriend, having dated at least 8 men before him. She was a so called Dj and her whole life was all about parties and fleshpots. My brother on the other hand came from a strict Christian family and abandoned all the values he identified with because of the girl. The only thing he got from the relationship was premium billing.


The Crux of the matter now is that he went bankrupt trying to fund her extravagant lifestyle and even went into debts. He borrowed money from 7 different loan apps and they have been on his neck. We have been able to handle 3 of the loans and some of the remaining loan companies are even threatening to post his photos on social media and Newspapers as a fraudster and also blacklist his bvn.

He has been getting troubling phone calls from the loan apps and is basically ruined both mentally and physically. He looks so lean this days and has become humble to my parents and even to me his younger brother. The family he rejected and refused to even give one Kobo in his heydays is now trying by all possible means to rescue him from the slump as we are his only backbone . The girl in question does not even know what he is going through.

How do we rescue the foolish young man as he still isn't ready to fully give up the girl. A friend told him he can't even help him get back on his feet because it will be like pouring water into a leaking bucket. While I was at school this dude hardly sent me or my younger ones anything but was sending a sizeable amount to the girl monthly because he was "in love". I really need helpful suggestions from the house on this matter. Mods help me get this to fp

All of these were as a result of over pampering a full blown adult.
1. He never struggled on his own to change his 10k job.
2. He never paid any bill in the house as a sign of responsibility when he was earning the 10k.
3. He is still living with his parents receiving "mummy thank you, daddy thank you" after each free meal.
Now tell me how he will even value anything as a sign of appreciation.
Op, tell your parents to give him some responsibilities like your school fees or 50% of the home feeding to be doing or he move out of the house with immediate effect. He needs to learn to be a man the hard way.

Bring ur broda for deliverance.
just 50 strokes of lashes go wake he sense

I'm here to ask all of us, what's our relationship like with our siblings? Who's your favourite and why?

Totilopussylick:
I know you are telling lies ... but continue

Most you turn everything to a joke you cock-eyed bum. I am hardly active on nairaland you should know and I have no time for creating fables like a raconteur. This matter is a bugging issue and I don't need comments like urs

I'm talking from experience, my younger brother did worse. I even created a thread about it last year.

You can't dictate for him. He's old enough to make his decisions. Just leave him alone, let him pay his loans. He's gonna learn the hard way. The best you owe him as a brother is to pray to God to change him. Prayer solves so many things.

You guys pampered him when he was much younger, and I would say, you are reaping the dividend of what you allowed.

My younger brother is getting worse by the day, but I have taken it to God in prayers, because everyone is tired of advising him and I hope life teach him a lesson, so that he will come back to his senses.

Well, no need crying over spilled milk. Go to God in Prayer.

It's simple. You all have to abandone him so that he will learn from the girl.
If you lift him up without first making sure the girl have left, your brother won't learn nothing

LaPrimero:
My Brother got gainfully employed mid 2021 due to the efforts of my parents. He had been struggling with a 10k job since he finished service before he got this well paying job. Everything was going well as he started well at his working place and was even getting applauded by his boss and higher ranking staffs as he was taken as someone of great promise. He was also in good times with my parents.

Around November last year, he sighted this chubby fine girl and became restless. He even said "she is the one". He hustled for the girl's number and soon started something with her. She accepted his proposal the moment he asked. Our Dad told him it was too early for all that and he needed to focus on building his still budding career but he turned a deaf ear. He soon started lavishing funds on the girl to my parents consternation. He even started discussing intimate details about our family with the girl within a short frame of time. Around January this year, Matters came to a head and started being utterly disrespectful to our parents. He even cut off Everyone that tried to advice him on the folly of the "relationship". He basically became a stranger to the family and his friends all because of a girl. The girl was so demanding, Manipulative and infuriating. The worst is that the girl was a serial girlfriend, having dated at least 8 men before him. She was a so called Dj and her whole life was all about parties and fleshpots. My brother on the other hand came from a strict Christian family and abandoned all the values he identified with because of the girl. The only thing he got from the relationship was premium billing.


The Crux of the matter now is that he went bankrupt trying to fund her extravagant lifestyle and even went into debts. He borrowed money from 7 different loan apps and they have been on his neck. We have been able to handle 3 of the loans and some of the remaining loan companies are even threatening to post his photos on social media and Newspapers as a fraudster and also blacklist his bvn.

He has been getting troubling phone calls from the loan apps and is basically ruined both mentally and physically. He looks so lean this days and has become humble to my parents and even to me his younger brother. The family he rejected and refused to even give one Kobo in his heydays is now trying by all possible means to rescue him from the slump as we are his only backbone . The girl in question does not even know what he is going through.

How do we rescue the foolish young man as he still isn't ready to fully give up the girl. A friend told him he can't even help him get back on his feet because it will be like pouring water into a leaking bucket. While I was at school this dude hardly sent me or my younger ones anything but was sending a sizeable amount to the girl monthly because he was "in love". I really need helpful suggestions from the house on this matter. Mods help me get this to fp

This is one of the reasons why some God doesn't give some people too much wealth or power, they tend to misbehave vawulently...Help him for now, if he no change him battitude , leave him to suffer for 600 years.

Klass99:
Harunawest, I see you viewing the topic. I am interested in your thoughts on the issue.

If I talk wetin dey my own mind, una go drag me from The DRC to Kampala, so make I rest.

lol

You know what I like about your post? Your sense of responsibility. I like the way you constructed your topic: "my brother ruined himself.."

The world needs people like you. People who wouldn't run to Nairaland to blame men, women, and everyone around them for the choices they made.

About your brother, may God take him out of the dungeon he's found himself. He has to go through this phase to understand the consequences of bad decisions.

Klass99:
Harunawest, I see you viewing the topic. I am interested in your thoughts on the issue.

If I talk wetin dey my own mind, una go drag me from The DRC to Kampala, so make I rest.

I'm listening.

LaPrimero:

How do we rescue the foolish young man as he still isn't ready to fully give up the girl. A friend told him he can't even help him get back on his feet because it will be like pouring water into a leaking bucket. While I was at school this dude hardly sent me or my younger ones anything but was sending a sizeable amount to the girl monthly because he was "in love". I really need helpful suggestions from the house on this matter. Mods help me get this to fp

Well your brother is an adult and is responsible for his own actions.
He'll learn his lessons when she's done with him and leaves him. Hopefully no much damage by then and he can pick up himself again.

Your brother matter na funny bone

Just because of kpekus


No matter how deeply In love I'm gonna be..

My family will always comes first...

And this thing called billing from girlfriends,
I desist it.
Don't ask me for money,I will give you on my own will.


Still typing.....

.

Serial girlfriend.

Love crazy guh... You never see anything

Guys can learn a very big lesson from this.. any strange girl you meet and fall in love with, asking you to block or cut off your family members and friends is a big red flag. Their type won't assist you in your time of trouble and you'll still go back to beg the family members and friend you cut off for help.

@OP your brother is an ingrate.. even if you help him get back on his feet and he meets the same girl or another street girl, he'll repeat the same attitude all over again.

Naija women are their to add sorry and salt to injury

maybe delete her

Klass99:
Harunawest, I see you viewing the topic. I am interested in your thoughts on the issue.

If I talk wetin dey my own mind, una go drag me from The DRC to Kampala, so make I rest.

Abeg tok am Na.


Me I am just surprised he didn't say anything about his brother being responsible for his actions.

Only a spoilt or over pampered child will behave like that...me wey sakpa hold down even the 10k job I was doing I no still get who I dey fall back on.I was dry.

Now wey I don dey float small, because of love I will spend all I have on a woman .Them never see the woman.