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I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me - Family - Nairaland

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My Husband Refused To Take A Second Wife, Please Separate Us, Woman Tells Court / My Brother's Ex Live-In-Lover Has Barred Him From His 2 Kids, Wants To Jail Him / My Neighbour Is About To Kill His Wife!! Please Advice. (urgent) (2) (3) (4)

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I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by Vincent88: 1:33pm On Feb 25, 2019
Hello everyone im new to this forum this is my fidst post.

Please pardon my english it is not fluent because im french speaken but im married to your nigerian sister (my wife).

Im vincent by name 30 years old married for 2 years with no child yet. I come from a family of 3 brothers and im the last born. Our dad passed away 20 years ago so it was our mom took care of us she fought so hard for us to have a better life unfortunatly she also passed away 13 years ago i was only 17 , my senior brother, our first born was married with a son 4 years old at that time, my middle brother was studying at the university and i went to stay with my elder brother.

His wife started seducing me anytime my brother is away in a business trips , she will try all her power but i was rejecting her by reminding her that she is my brother wife i will never deceiving him by sleeping with her and she started maltreating me by no giving me foods and giving me lots of housework to do, i never disrespected her and i will do as she said.

I was scared to tell my brother because he is a short tempered man he had so much love for his wife and he wouldnt even believe me. So she carry on with her mission after 2 years later i was just 19 years old she was 27 i gave in by sleeping with her (worst mistake ever) we started doing it lots of times when my brother is away on business or when the son is at school. She was then pregnant by me i have begged her to abort it but she went ahead with the pregnancy , all my brother knew that he was the father and she had a baby girl who is my carbon copy but people cant see it because they will always says she is looking like me but no one had suspect that she is mine even my brother.

After the baby i could not continue sleeping with her she was angry at me , threatened me that she will send me to prìson but i made my mind no to do it again so after 2 years of supporting her madness i had enough that made me leave the house for goods i went to stay with a friend and i was still in good relationship with my brother even he try to find out what was my reason for leaving the house. Imade up some lies he accepted it.

So he and his wife had 2 more children that makes them four 2 boys and 2 girls but he caught her with another man on their matrimonial bed and he went for DNA for their last child because she is very fair like a mixed race compare to her other siblings who are dark skin and the result come up that he was not the biological father so he divorce her but kept the child because he love the child


After the divorce my brother's life is not the same how it used to be , he is broke and he is a alcoholic and womaniser , i have given him money several times to start business but he still spending the money on women and alcohol. I stop giving him money but i do provide foods and school fees for all 4 children.

My problem is that since i got married my wife had three miscarriages, by 4 months she will loose the pregnancy it really broke her hearts and im in so much pain too but i believed that im being punished for having a child with my ex sister in law and my poor wife is paying for something she never did.

I love her so much and i dont want to loose her . No one else knows about this is only me and ex sister in law who knows about this. I really want to Confess and be free but i dont know how to tell this to my wife and brother . My wife adore my brother's child, they spend holidays in our house and my brother has never question the other 3 DNA because he has a strong believe that they are all his except the youngest girl. My daughter, she is now 10 years .

Please advice me on how to bring this matter to him please no insult i regrets my mistake i sometime wish it was a dream . Sorry for the long post

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by SUPERPACK: 1:45pm On Feb 25, 2019
Go and buy 3 bundles of cane, after finishing them on you I will advice you.

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by Abfinest007(m): 1:56pm On Feb 25, 2019
just cook anoda story convince ur broda to go for a DNA test for all the children tell him u will pay then when d result is out beg him to forgive u

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by stevepee42(m): 1:58pm On Feb 25, 2019
If this story is true... all you have to do is confess to the members of your family, your brother included. You were still young when it happened.....so your fragile heart can be at rest..."all those big big aunty , i nor forget ooo"

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by eyinjuege: 1:59pm On Feb 25, 2019
What is causing your wife's miscarriages? They need to investigate whats causing it.
Get a good hospital for when next she gets pregnant. Some women just need to be placed on aspirin when pregnant, but that's for particular disease conditions in them. Some may have rhesus incompatibiilty and so many other reasons for recurrent miscarriages.
Anyway, as per your child with your brother, if I were in your shoes that secret remains one forever. You're a deadly snake sha, and if i were also in your brother's shoes and find out, I will try to kill you.

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by SEGLIZ: 2:01pm On Feb 25, 2019
Vincent88:
Hello everyone im new to this forum this is my fidst post .please pardon my english it is not fluent because im french speaken but im married to your nigerian sister (my wife). Im vincent by name 30 years old married for 2 years with no child yet. I come from a family of 3 brothers and im the last born. Our dad passed away 20 years ago so it was our mom took care of us she fought so hard for us to have a better life unfortunatly she also passed away 13 years ago i was only 17 , my senior brother our first born was married with a son 4 years old at that time , my middle brother was studying at the university and i went to stays with my elder brother. His wife started seducing me anytime my brother is away in a business trips , she will try all her power but i was rejecting her by reminding her that she is my brother wife i will never deceiving him by sleeping with her and she started maltreating me by no giving me foods and giving me s lots of housework to do , i never direspect her and i will do as she said. I was scared to tell my brother because he is a short tempered man he had so much love for his wife and he wouldnt even believe me. So she carry on with her mission after 2 years later i was just 19 years old she was 27 i gave in by sleeping with her ( worst mistake ever) we started doing it lots of times when my brother is away on business or when the son is at school. She was then pregnant by me i have begged her to abort it but she went ahead with the pregnancy , all my brother knew that he was the father and she had a baby girl who is my carbon copy but people cant see it because they will always says she is looking like me but no one had suspect that she is mine even my brother. After the baby i could not continue sleeping with her she was angry at me , threatened me that she will send me to prìson but i made my mind no to do it again so after 2 years of supporting her madness i had enought that made me leave the house for goods i went to stay with a friend and i was still in good relationship with my brother even he try to find out what was my reason for lesving the house i made up some lies he accept it. So he and his wife had 2 more children that makes them four 2 boys and 2 girls but he caught her with another man on their matrimional bed and he went for DNA for their last child because she is very fair like a mixed race compare to her other siblings who are dark skin and the result come up that he was not the biological father so he divorce her but kept the child because because he love the child . After the divorce my brother life is not the same how it used to be , he is broke and he is a alcoholic and womaniser , i have given him money severals times to satrt business but he still spending the money on women and alcohol i stop giving him money but i do provide foods and school fees for all 4 children. My problem is that since i got married my wife had three miscarriages by 4 months she will loose the pregnancy it really broke her hearts and im in so much pain too but i believed that im being punished for having a child with my ex sister in law and my poor wife is paying for something she never did i love her so much and i dont want to loose her . No one else knows about this is only me and ex sister in law wjo knows about this. I really want to confesse and be free but i dont know how to tell this to my wife and brother . My wife adore my brother child they spends holidays in our house and my brother has never question the other 3 DNA because he has a strong believe that they are all his except the youngest girl. My daughter she is now 10 years . Please advices me on how to bring this matter to him please no insult i regrets my mistake i sometime wish it was a dream . Sorry for the long post

the one you said is yours, is that one a girl or a boy?
how come the DNA so matches with your brother?
no point first and foremost resolve it with your wife before going to your bro. you need to be on same page with your wife so you don't come crumbling like a pack of card like your brother did.
after putting your home in order then you can approach your bro, then be wise by involving your other bro I'm sure your bro would come around with good explanation and genuineness.
don't get me wrong, expect outrage and fireworks but in all blood is thicker than water.
he need reconcile with his wife if he wish to get it right again. there are some things he doesn't understand about his wife, the day he divorced his wife that day he pulled off the plug to his own life. they destined partners.

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by Vincent88: 2:21pm On Feb 25, 2019
stevepee42:
If this story is true... all you have to do is confess to the members of your family, your brother included. You were still young when it happened.....so your fragile heart can be at rest..."all those big big aunty , i nor forget ooo"

Yes the story is true im not lying ... thanks the only family i have is my 2 brothers ,the other family members we dont have a very good relationships but i will try to talk to my middle bro who is in dubai to see if he can offer any help to talk to our senior brother . All i want is for this secrets to come out so i can beg for my brother forgiveness and be free

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by Vincent88: 2:26pm On Feb 25, 2019
SEGLIZ:

the one you said is yours, is that one a girl or a boy?
how come the DNA so matches with your brother?
no point first and foremost resolve it with your wife before going to your bro. you need to be on same page with your wife so you don't come crumbling like a pack of card like your brother did.
after putting your home in order then you can approach your bro, then be wise by involving your other bro I'm sure your bro would come around with good explanation and genuineness.
don't get me wrong, expect outrage and fireworks but in all blood is thicker than water.
he need reconcile with his wife if he wish to get it right again. there are some things he doesn't understand about his wife, the day he divorced his wife that day he pulled off the plug to his own life. they destined partners.

My child is the second child of my brother , the first child is 17 years then my daughter who is 10 then a boy 8 and the last child who my brother went for her DNA she is 6 years old. Thank you i will talk with my middle brother to see if he can help me on how to reveals this secret from him. As for the ex wife she is out of the country married with 2 kids she is actually in USA they cant renconcile again . Thanks

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by Vincent88: 2:29pm On Feb 25, 2019
eyinjuege:
What is causing your wife's miscarriages? They need to investigate whats causing it.
Get a good hospital for when next she gets pregnant. Some women just need to be placed on aspirin when pregnant, but that's for particular disease conditions in them. Some may have rhesus incompatibiilty and so many other reasons for recurrent miscarriages.
Anyway, as per your child with your brother, if I were in your shoes that secret remains one forever. You're a deadly snake sha, and if i were also in your brother's shoes and find out, I will try to kill you.
We have been to many good hospitals and she is very okey in herslef and the doctors cannot find the exact cause of her miscarriage all they been saying she is fine which is true because she get pregnant easily but it doesnt stays. It is like a spiritual things . Thank you

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by yvelchstores(f): 5:58pm On Feb 25, 2019
This is a very sensitive issue however I have to state that a man who believes he is bound is bound but if you believe in Jesus, u can no longer be bound for your past sins because he paid for them all with his life.

For the issue about your daughter, your wife will forgive u but your brother, that will be so tough, only God can touch a man's heart so I suggest you pray about it first.
Since your other brother is away, if your brother is a Catholic, go to a priest and confess asking him to be a middle man between you and your brother. He will help explain things to your brother particularly stressing the fact that you have not been yourself all these years.

A DNA test should still be conducted because the girl might just be your brother's at the end of the day but the confession is important not withstanding.

It won't be easy but it will be worth it. I support your plans to come clean but do it through a man of God.

All the best

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by OKOATA(m): 6:43pm On Feb 25, 2019
This your story is very deep O. Who knows maybe the remaining children isn't even for your brother. I am sure that if you tell your brother he will be skeptical about the remaining children. I fear marriage like hell. Last year my best friend had sex with my GF. When I found out I took a lot of MJ and moved on. Bro telling your brother might cause him a nervous breakdown. Someone who's a drunkard and a womanizer, he might try to commit suicide or even harm you. See a priest or an elderly person in the family. Commit your ways to God and for those guys we too de trust woman una see Women So. God help us.

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by yvelchstores(f): 7:22pm On Feb 25, 2019
OKOATA:
This your story is very deep O. Who knows maybe the remaining children isn't even for your brother. I am sure that if you tell your brother he will be skeptical about the remaining children. I fear marriage like hell. Last year my best friend had sex with my GF. When I found out I took a lot of MJ and moved on. Bro telling your brother might cause him a nervous breakdown. Someone who's a drunkard and a womanizer, he might try to commit suicide or even harm you. See a priest or an elderly person in the family. Commit your ways to God and for those guys we too de trust woman una see Naija Women So. God help us.
what is MJ? Menial jobs?

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by Gloriagee(f): 8:09pm On Feb 25, 2019
Marijuana, I believe
yvelchstores:
what is MJ? Menial jobs?

32 Likes

Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by SEGLIZ: 8:32pm On Feb 25, 2019
Vincent88:


My child is the second child of my brother , the first child is 17 years then my daughter who is 10 then a boy 8 and the last child who my brother went for her DNA she is 6 years old. Thank you i will talk with my middle brother to see if he can help me on how to reveals this secret from him. As for the ex wife she is out of the country married with 2 kids she is actually in USA they cant renconcile again . Thanks

your bro need to reconcile with his former wife, really the woman wronged him but as it stands now plead with her at least say some positive things to his life so as to pick again.

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by mankettle(m): 8:38pm On Feb 25, 2019
@ Op you get mind Sha.
you want the drunkard to finally kill himself?
if you feel guilty why not get a flat for your brother and take it upon yourself to train ALL the Kids equally

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by Vincent88: 9:11pm On Feb 25, 2019
mankettle:
@ Op you get mind Sha.
you want the drunkard to finally kill himself?
if you feel guilty why not get a flat for your brother and take it upon yourself to train ALL the Kids equally
Im worried about this too because i dont want my secret to lead him to suicide because its already suffering so much since the divorce but myself im not in peace too because hidden it is killing me every singld day. My brother own a house where he is staying with the kids but he does not want anyone to take over the children myself and wife has tried if we can get the kids to live with us or just the 2 girls he has refused saying he cant live without them he has already lost their mother and he cant be apart from them their are his treasures . He bring them to my house every holidays . Do you think i should keep the secrets from my brother and my wife please?

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by OKOATA(m): 9:12pm On Feb 25, 2019
yvelchstores:
what is MJ? Menial jobs?
Mariwuana my dear

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by Vincent88: 9:15pm On Feb 25, 2019
SEGLIZ:

your bro need to reconcile with his former wife, really the woman wronged him but as it stands now plead with her at least say some positive things to his life so as to pick again.
Ok thanks i will speak with my brother about this but do you think it is neccesary that i talk to him about the child or just keep the secrets from him and my wife pls?

1 Like

Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by Vincent88: 9:19pm On Feb 25, 2019
OKOATA:
This your story is very deep O. Who knows maybe the remaining children isn't even for your brother. I am sure that if you tell your brother he will be skeptical about the remaining children. I fear marriage like hell. Last year my best friend had sex with my GF. When I found out I took a lot of MJ and moved on. Bro telling your brother might cause him a nervous breakdown. Someone who's a drunkard and a womanizer, he might try to commit suicide or even harm you. See a priest or an elderly person in the family. Commit your ways to God and for those guys we too de trust woman una see Naija Women So. God help us.
Im sorry bro about what your GF and bf did to you but happy to hear that you has move on i wish u the best in life. Thank you for the advices i appreciate it

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by BiggyB242(m): 9:22pm On Feb 25, 2019
Hush!!! You don't want to free your mind, rather you want your daughter since your wife is finding it difficult to have a child, be sincere.

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by Vincent88: 9:27pm On Feb 25, 2019
yvelchstores:
This is a very sensitive issue however I have to state that a man who believes he is bound is bound but if you believe in Jesus, u can no longer be bound for your past sins because he paid for them all with his life.

For the issue about your daughter, your wife will forgive u but your brother, that will be so tough, only God can touch a man's heart so I suggest you pray about it first.
Since your other brother is away, if your brother is a Catholic, go to a priest and confess asking him to be a middle man between you and your brother. He will help explain things to your brother particularly stressing the fact that you have not been yourself all these years.

A DNA test should still be conducted because the girl might just be your brother's at the end of the day but the confession is important not withstanding.

It won't be easy but it will be worth it. I support your plans to come clean but do it through a man of God.

All the best
Thank you for the advices i appreciate it . Yes very true there is a possibility that she is my brother child i prayed to God that she is my brother child but the ressemblance with me is just too much .

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by 3plet: 9:27pm On Feb 25, 2019
Don't confess yet!!! 3 miscarriage @about 16weeks could be as a result of "incompetent "cervix", has ur wife had a surgical procedure performed "cerclage" on her @about 13weeks of any of the 3 terminated pregnancies?

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by SEGLIZ: 9:28pm On Feb 25, 2019
Vincent88:

Ok thanks i will speak with my brother about this but do you think it is neccesary that i talk to him about the child or just keep the secrets from him and my wife pls?

don't keep it from both. no matter what, the longer the secret the more damage it does, to you as an individual, your home, your wife and bro. it will sure be exposed some days to come then it will be fresh but now is better so before a year two, three etc it would have died down. so earlier the better than bringing it when you would have forgotten it.
remember first resolve it with your wife before going out to others. it won't be easy but it the only way to bring about peace.

7 Likes

Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by Vincent88: 9:30pm On Feb 25, 2019
BiggyB242:
Hush.. You don't want to free your mind rather you want your daughter since you are finding it difficult to have one. Be sincere.
I swear i dont want her even if it came up that she is my child i will never take her away from my brother. She will still his daughter no matter what , I just want to freed myself and move on

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by OKOATA(m): 9:38pm On Feb 25, 2019
SEGLIZ:

your bro need to reconcile with his former wife, really the woman wronged him but as it stands now plead with her at least say some positive things to his life so as to pick again.
No he shouldn't reconcile with his ex, worst decision ever. A lot of married men die these days due to HPB, many married men are going through hell in marriages. I was at a Hotel in Lekki and this sexy lady came into the bar. My friend told me she's a married woman and almost all the guys at the bar have smarched her. The husband lives around the bar already accepted his fate and living with the wife. What kills a man faster than living with a wayward woman. An adulterous woman is more dangerous than the Queen cobra. They kill faster than bullet

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by SEGLIZ: 10:08pm On Feb 25, 2019
OKOATA:
No he shouldn't reconcile with his ex, worst decision ever. A lot of married men die these days due to HPB, many married men are going through hell in marriages. I was at a Hotel in Lekki and this sexy lady came into the bar. My friend told me she's a married woman and almost all the guys at the bar at smarched her. The husband lives around the bar already accepted his fate and living with the wife. What kills a man faster than living with a wayward woman. An adulterous woman is more dangerous than the Queen cobra. They kill faster than bullet

I got you and understand your point. all I'm trying to say is they amending cracks like forgiving each other even though they won't be coming together no more.

1 Like

Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by OKOATA(m): 10:20pm On Feb 25, 2019
SEGLIZ:

I got you and understand your point. all I'm trying to say is they amending cracks like forgiving each other even though they won't be coming together no more.
Forgiving is cool but trying to stay in contact will make the brother more miserable because he will be inbetween going back to his ex or not. If the ex-wife needs to see the kids she can see them from their school. The brother will come around and eventually move on.

3 Likes

Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by SEGLIZ: 10:28pm On Feb 25, 2019
OKOATA:
Forgiving is cool but trying to stay in contact will make the brother more miserable because he will be inbetween going back to his ex or not. If the ex-wife needs to see the kids she can see them from their school. The brother will come around and eventually move on.

year exactly my point. the divorce had an adverse effect on him.
he wasn't really ready before he pulled the plug and the intertwined destiny thing is also playing out. but all in all he should keep off but do the needful.

3 Likes

Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by Michelle55(f): 11:09pm On Feb 25, 2019
OKOATA:
This your story is very deep O. Who knows maybe the remaining children isn't even for your brother. I am sure that if you tell your brother he will be skeptical about the remaining children. I fear marriage like hell. Last year my best friend had sex with my GF. When I found out I took a lot of MJ and moved on. Bro telling your brother might cause him a nervous breakdown. Someone who's a drunkard and a womanizer, he might try to commit suicide or even harm you. See a priest or an elderly person in the family. Commit your ways to God and for those guys we too de trust woman una see Naija Women So. God help us.
He was never your best friend.. Best friends would never intentionally hurt those they love or care about. Your ex and the so-called best friend has been hitting the jackpot without your knowledge. Sorry about that though, you will do just fine!
@Op, go with an elderly person to seek forgiveness from your brother, if not for anything but for your peace of mind. Explain things to him, he would definitely understand why you couldn't open up to him all those years.

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by OKOATA(m): 11:33pm On Feb 25, 2019
Michelle55:

He was never your best friend.. Best friends would never intentionally hurt those they love or care about. Your ex and the so-called best friend has been hitting the jackpot without your knowledge. Sorry about that though, you will do just fine!
@Op, go with an elderly person to seek forgiveness from your brother, if not for anything but for your peace of mind. Explain things to him, he would definitely understand why you couldn't open up to him all those years.
me and that BF met in sec schooI, We shared things together. I have moved on. I never let an heart break hurt me no more.

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Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by Vincent88: 11:36pm On Feb 25, 2019
[quote author=3plet post=76123758]Don't confess yet!!! 3 miscarriage @about 16weeks could be as a result of "incompetent "cervix", has ur wife had a surgical procedure performed "cerclage" on her @about 13weeks of any of the 3 terminated pregnancies? [/quote
We did all the tests to find out if any problem like incompotent cervix or mis- shaped uterus but the result were negative , she has no problem it is like something spiritual
Re: I Had A Child With My Brother's Ex Wife. Please Read And Advice Me by Vincent88: 11:39pm On Feb 25, 2019
SEGLIZ:

don't keep it from both. no matter what, the longer the secret the more damage it does, to you as an individual, your home, your wife and bro. it will sure be exposed some days to come then it will be fresh but now is better so before a year two, three etc it would have died down. so earlier the better than bringing it when you would have forgotten it.
remember first resolve it with your wife before going out to others. it won't be easy but it the only way to bring about peace.
Thanks i will tell my wife but im not sure when is the right time to speak with her maybe early morning or very late at night i just dont know and i hope she will not leave me after hearing this

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