dayokanu:

The key thing is if he is doing these things deliberately.

When I was young I used to lose biros almost everyday. Someone might term it as being deliberatebut how can anyone be destroying his brothers properties on purpose.

People are just being ridiculous here. Well if you dont want him to live with you send him out.

Probably that was the way your husband "destroyed" others peoples items before growing up into a matured man you married.

I wonder if it was your son who was eating too much and destroying you would have kicked him out too.

Teenage boys eat a lot Thats the truth nothing unusual about it.

chaircover:

We can blame the boy but has someone bothered to sit dwn and show the boy how to use these gadgets.

We take a lot of things for granted but it could be that the boy has never used these things before. i had a 18 year old help that had never used a gas cooker in her life and it wasnt until she nearly burnt the place down that I questioned her and found out.

Sounds like he has a heavy hand and is handles things with brute strength.

As for the food, I have seen grown men totally misbehave because of food, Food for some people is more important than the air that they breathe. some people who have experienced hunger in their lives tend to over compensate when they see food.

I am not on the boys side and he should be given a good telling off when necessary. the poster should also involve her husband so she doesnt carry the burden alone.

chaircover:

Outstrip there must be an explanation. I am not saying that the poster is exaggerating but I just don't understand it

I can understand the electronics. With the erratic Naija power supply, it could be that it just so happened that this contributed to them breaking down, but things like mop bucket and dustpan I am not so sure. So unless he is deliberately breaking them (the question is why) these items should last a very long time.

If he is deliberately breaking them, then [b]he needs some mental help and I would imagine that he would show his behavioural/mental/other problems in other areas but the poster doesn't mention this in her post.[/b]Anyhow I think the hubby should be involved sooner rather than later.

Outstrip:

I see where you are coming from but how can you manhandle that many electronics. I can understand a blender or something like that but these particular electronics are not the type you move around. They are stationary. Unless he is chewing on them or kicking them then I don't see how he can break them

Owu gal:

Thanks to all who replied. I appreciate the criticisms of my behavior and the very wise and knowledgeable advise and insight and even empathy.

To the people who ask if He really did destroy all those electronics; the answer is a big yes. I have not exageratted. it seems like a lot, but we (used to) have a lot of electronics. some men indulge in electronic gadgets like women indulge in shoes. we have flat screen tvs and projectors and so many different types of sound systems you name it we have it. so please dont think I am making up the quantity. We actually own a lot of these things, well not anymore as most of them are spoilt now. its not low current that damaged them, I know one of our tvs actually fell down because he decided to try to balance it on his knees. another dvd player got damaged because he tried to jam more than 5 dvd players into a 5 dvd player. we found broken bits of dvds inside the player.

As for the food issue. I know a lot of young men eat a lot. but what about pouring a whole tin of cowbell milk ( not kidding and it was full 4 of the times I caught him pouring, not scooping with a spoon, all the milk) into a bowl of garri? or eating rice and using up more than 12 pieces of meat so that your rice looks like a beef kebab dish with no sight of rice in sight?
How many of you eat half a crate of eggs in one day simply because you are hungry and not because you are tryin to buff up.

I never mentioned that he uses the largest size of close up toothpaste every 2 weeks. When I travelled he finshed the brand new tube I gave him and descended on my toddlers baby toothpaste after his finished. also he had used up all my sensodyne which i left half full . he didnt touch his brother's colgate herbal toothpaste ( we seperate our toothpastes cos we have different needs). I could not even talk. I was upset. I just went to sleep.

To those who say I am intolerant. Maybe I am. I am intolerant towards that 100 years ago mentality that the husband owns the whole house. in fact I own over 3/4 of the things in our house and I paid for it with my money. My husband owns the electronics, but I bought everything else. I am a working woman and have always had a job that paid me decently. If we didnt have these things people would not want to come to our house.

I am intolerant towards people who "visit" us at 5am in the morning and stay all day, eating breakfast at 7 and then lunch at noon and then another lunch at 3 pm and then dinner and who raid my fridge for snacks in between. I dont say anything to them, but now I dont buy those things unless I know somenone is coming to visit. I hide food now, my mother used to do that and I used to wonder why she locked the store and food etc. now I see plainly. I am not yet at that point of wealth where the cost of food is unnoticeable to me. I am the one who goes to the market,

I dont like when relatives "shop" in my closets for clothes when i am not around. thank goodness that i am fatter than most of the ones who are my age range and too young and trendy for the ones who are as fat as I am.

I dont like it when in-laws who live within my home welcome other relatives to shop for their bedspreads (in my absence) in my linen closet because "she" has so many

I am a modern woman. and if my relatives like my house because of the comforts it has, then please care for it with me not try to strip me of it by destroying my property.

thanks for the replies. I appreciate you all

chaircover:

I still think that you should have a word with your husband.

This is not normal behaviour and even though I am trying hard to beleive everything you are saying (12 peices of meat is a hard one for me to beleive unless we are talking about N20 buka meat size and 18 eggs in one sitting) your husband will be in a better position to talk to his brother.