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Am I Loosing A Friend? - Romance - Nairaland

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Am I Loosing A Friend? by demwan: 10:14am On Aug 11, 2011
Please I need your candid contributions and opinions.

There is this man in my compound that I admire and respect so much even before we got into talking terms. To cut it short, somehow, we became friends, I visit him, and we chat and respect each other. His girl friend comes to visit him. I’ve never for once felt bad about it because he is just my friend.

I was sick sometime ago, he called me and noticed my response was not sound, he promised to buy some drugs for me. When he came back at about 11.00pm, he called me on phone that I should come and pick the drugs outside, but when I came and he saw how tired I was, he just hugged me tight for the first time, kissed my lips and told me he was sorry for coming back late. So we both went to his flat, drank the drugs. Thereafter, he started kissing me, along the line, romancing me and kissing my lips, struggled for my breast, and eventually got it, I became weak and allowed him. Suddenly, he pulled off to make love to me but I insisted we cannot do it. He begged and begged but all to no avail. He started apologizing that he was sorry and that it wasn’t intentional and that he didn’t mean to hurt me. So I left his apartment that night.

He stopped calling me, text messages, I did not stopped sending him messages, though I stopped visiting him too but somehow I never wanted the friendship to end, so this affected me greatly and I tried all I could to make him understand through text messages but he never replied any of them until I sent him this one: “Friendship is the ability to see beyond the fault of another and to discover the beauties of ones heart” suddenly he called. But there was little a distance since then until Just recently the same incident occurred again in his house, he got angry and asked me to leave, I knew he didn’t mean it. I even gave him reasons why I didn’t want to do it. Though he told me on that day, that he likes me but that am always afraid, so I decided to sleep at his place. He didn’t touch me and I didn’t touch him till the next morning, I left. But since then he has not called me and I did not call him as well.


So my question is:
What do you think this man wants? Is he up to anything?
And Because of the regard I have for him, and I don’t want the friendship to end just like that.
And how do I handle the situation because I wouldn’t want keeping MALICE to take place
Your contributions, suggestion and opinion are welcomed
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by Nobody: 10:43am On Aug 11, 2011
LMAO @ This THREAD! ARRANT NONSENSE! WHAT?
You already know WHAT he WANTS! YOU WANT IT TOO! Else why do you keep BUGGING HIM? He has a GIRLFRIEND! JEEZ! YOU ARE ACTUALLY BEGGING TO BE R@PED! You mention FRIENDSHIP? RESPECT? SMH! I cant find words to describe this! HOW OLD ARE YOU? Cos in my opinion, you need to [size=20pt]GROW THA F*^K UP![/size] undecided
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by LongOne1(m): 10:46am On Aug 11, 2011
Of course, he’s up to something, he just wants to sleep with you, duh.

No point keeping a friend like that, he definitely doesn’t have your best interests at heart. Better distance yourself now before you succumb to temptation.
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by LordReed(m): 10:47am On Aug 11, 2011
First of all ask yourself what you want. You enjoy him kissing you and sucking your b[i]oo[/i]bs yet you only want to be friends. Please leave the poor guy alone and stop tormenting him with your untouchable coochie.
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by BAMMZ(m): 10:49am On Aug 11, 2011
You obviously like him beyond mere friendship and he is fully aware of that. He is trying to give you what he percieves you want from him. He is taking some advantage here. Why dont you just free him. He must be commited to his babe. Its good to hav friends but both parties need to see from same glass. Luv is not selfish.
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by claremont(m): 10:50am On Aug 11, 2011
demwan:


So my question is:
What do you think this man wants? Is he up to anything?
And Because of the regard I have for him, and I don’t want the friendship to end just like that.
And how do I handle the situation because I wouldn’t want keeping MALICE to take place
Your contributions, suggestion and opinion are welcomed

What "this man" wants is the same thing I and 99.9% of males left alone in a room with a female would want, and that is to sleep with you. How an obvious fact like this is so hard for you to understand beggars belief! shocked shocked shocked
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by Nobody: 10:55am On Aug 11, 2011
Lord_Reed:

First of all ask yourself what you want. You enjoy him kissing you and sucking your b[i]oo[/i]bs yet you only want to be friends. Please leave the poor guy alone and stop tormenting him with your untouchable coochie.
CAN YOU IMAGINE? This girl is DAMN TOO FUNNY! grin grin grin grin grin
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by MMM2(m): 10:58am On Aug 11, 2011
op
he wants 2 kill u with his pen*s angry
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by lindabon: 10:58am On Aug 11, 2011
hmmm, i tink u have to cut off the friendship. the guy definitely wont stop seeing himself as a reject and a looser weneva he sees u. u need to give him his space. cos u coming around is like rubbing the rejection back and all over his face.
in this sort of situation, malice usually follows. with time, the situation may subside btw d two of u, and he'll come around. bt 4 nw, u gatz to stop bothering about friendship wit him. cause d guy needs to sort the rejection out and yup! s*hit happens!!  undecided

and incase u've not gotten the vibe by now, here lemme rub it in for ya; HE JUST WANTS TO SLEEP WIT YA!!
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by Nobody: 10:59am On Aug 11, 2011
claremont:

What "this man" wants is the same thing I and 99.9% of males left alone in a room with a female would want, and that is to sleep with you [size=15pt]How an obvious fact like this is so hard for you to understand beggars belief![/size] shocked shocked shocked
So ON POINT! grin grin grin
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by lindabon: 11:02am On Aug 11, 2011
claremont:

What "this man" wants is the same thing I and 99.9% of males left alone in a room with a female would want, and that is to sleep with you. How an obvious fact like this is so hard for you to understand beggars belief! shocked shocked shocked


99.9%, nope! i so do not agree
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by LongOne1(m): 11:04am On Aug 11, 2011
I love this

lindabon:

hmmm, i tink u have to cut off the friendship. the guy definitely wont stop seeing himself as a reject and a looser weneva he sees u. u need to give him his space. cos u coming around is like rubbing the rejection back and all over his face.
in this sort of situation, malice usually follows. with time, the situation may subside btw d two of u, and he'll come around. bt 4 nw, u gatz to stop bothering about friendship wit him. cause d guy needs to sort the rejection out and yup! s*hit happens!!  undecided

and incase u've not gotten the vibe by now, here lemme rub it in for ya; HE JUST WANTS TO SLEEP WIT YA!!


and this
Lord_Reed:

First of all ask yourself what you want. You enjoy him kissing you and sucking your b[i]oo[/i]bs yet you only want to be friends. Please leave the poor guy alone and stop tormenting him with your untouchable coochie.

P.S. you can't eat your cake and have it
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by claremont(m): 11:06am On Aug 11, 2011
lindabon:


99.9%, nope! i so do not agree
^^^
Maybe Jesus Christ and Mohammed are the only positive deviants from the 99.9% norm, because even priests when left alone in a room with a lady will always listen to the snake and eat the forbidden apple!
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by LongOne1(m): 11:06am On Aug 11, 2011
lindabon:


99.9%, nope! i so do not agree

I too disagree, i feel it should be 100%  cheesy
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by paraphase(m): 11:07am On Aug 11, 2011
undecided
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by Andrew3(m): 11:10am On Aug 11, 2011
just abstain from him, all he wants is c0itus after which he will vanish
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by lindabon: 11:13am On Aug 11, 2011
Long One:

I too disagree, i feel it should be 100%  cheesy

LMAO, but some guys actually will still choose friendship over a one time  lipsrsealed !!
seen more guys like that so i tot i should come in their defence  undecided undecided undecided undecided grin grin grin grin grin



but then, ur words against mine  grin grin grin
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by LongOne1(m): 11:25am On Aug 11, 2011
^^^the problem with those guys is they were probably one of the 100/99.9%, then lost their game and became ‘just friends’.

They are still very dangerous though, as they are now working ‘under cover’ and can strike, like in this case at any point in time i.e. when you are both drunk (if they are sensible).  grin
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by pendo89(f): 11:43am On Aug 11, 2011
Now op
If you dont want to be burnt then kindly don't start what you are unable to finish.
Men are not like women. Gosh a woman can be comfortable with a kiss but the guy sees the kiss as a starter.
He has the main course in mind. I don't think I can torment a guy I love like that. Keep off or just finish what you started
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by tomaagy(m): 11:46am On Aug 11, 2011
Long One:

^^^the problem with those guys is they were probably one of the 100/99.9%, then lost their game and became ‘just friends’.

They are still very dangerous though, as they are now working ‘under cover’ and can strike, like in this case at any point in time i.e. when you are both drunk (if they are sensible).  grin
Laugh Wan kill me die!!!

lindabon:

hmmm, i tink u have to cut off the friendship. the guy definitely wont stop seeing himself as a reject and a looser weneva he sees u. u need to give him his space. cos u coming around is like rubbing the rejection back and all over his face.
in this sort of situation, malice usually follows. with time, the situation may subside btw d two of u, and he'll come around. bt 4 nw, u gatz to stop bothering about friendship wit him. cause d guy needs to sort the rejection out and yup! s*hit happens!!  undecided

and incase u've not gotten the vibe by now, here lemme rub it in for ya; HE JUST WANTS TO SLEEP WIT YA!!



Quite True

My Point: You like the guy smooching you but u dont want sex, but u claim he has a girlfriend, seriously u need to check yourself, wats up with your own boyfriend? You have already ruined the opportunity to just be friends forget that story!
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by lindabon: 11:51am On Aug 11, 2011
Long One:

i.e. when you are both drunk (if they are sensible).  grin

lol, they all fail at that point  angry angry angry  grin

but then again, that's just me undecided undecided
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by tomaagy(m): 11:58am On Aug 11, 2011
Poster you really need to be sincere with yourself, you allowed the guy kiss you and you still followed him to his room to have your bosoms sucked shocked shocked, is it that easy Honestly sounds like a movie script,

I honestly appreciate your attempt not to Be Intimate, but smooching your neighbour shocked shocked

Call your bf to smooche you atleast he will understand better!

Then about him not picking ur calls or replying your text grin grin grin thats a classic ignoring trick grin grin It always works on girls like you!
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by demwan: 12:19pm On Aug 11, 2011
well, its possible i like him more than just being a friend, am not denying that but i havent discovered that yet.

He called me to say that he likes me and that he wants us to start up something.

i asked about his girlfriend and he said she has a boyfriend
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by Nobody: 12:24pm On Aug 11, 2011
demwan:

well, its possible i like him more than just being a friend, am not denying that but i havent discovered that yet.

He called me to say that he likes me and that he wants us to start up something.

i asked about his girlfriend and he said she has a boyfriend

^^^^Awwww! DUMB and DUMBER! cry cry cry  undecided
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by tomaagy(m): 12:34pm On Aug 11, 2011
demwan:

well, its possible i like him more than just being a friend, am not denying that but i havent discovered that yet.

He called me to say that he likes me and that he wants us to start up something.

i asked about his girlfriend and he said she has a boyfriend



I feel your pain!! I dont want to shoot you down and i wont but trust me that guy is bad news, and to imagine you guys stay in the same compound, hell nooo,
There's going to be intimacy issues, i honestly dont subscribe to you having sex with him and im gonna tell you he just needs a sex buddy he doesnt love you one bit!

Get your own guy someplace else!
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by demwan: 1:12pm On Aug 11, 2011
Your contributions are wonerful.

But why are men like that? Though am not jumping into conclution anyway
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by tomaagy(m): 1:36pm On Aug 11, 2011
Simple answer to that, failed societal values, failed family system.

+ its not men alone its all human beings. chikena
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by callme2: 2:09pm On Aug 11, 2011
my people, can you allow the girl to give the man that benefit of doubt? You never can tell, they might end up becoming good lovers that could lead to marriage.

This marriage comes in different dimension
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by deniyor: 3:50am On Aug 13, 2011
A classic case of a dumb broad.

Op, you already lost the friendship. The friendship line has been crossed. So you have two choices: 1. go your seperate ways 2. Sleep with hm but it doesn't mean he won't still leave you.
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by Mynd44: 6:27am On Aug 13, 2011
This OP really get problem ooo. Leave the guy to his problem jorh cos I am sure he will still come back for that punny he did not get
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by tashanja(m): 12:16am On Aug 14, 2011
@Poster:
Living in the same compound makes you easily available and conveniently reachable at close hand.
As he already has a gf, you have two choices:
1) Either moving on and forgetting about what you've both just started between yourselves; or
2) Play along doing exactly what he has already been doing with his gf - as in being his booty call/cutting show/friends with benefits or whatever you wish to call it (since he claims the gf is having a bf also on the side) so that you too can also be one of his willing side dishes. lipsrsealed
Re: Am I Loosing A Friend? by Mynd44: 4:18am On Aug 14, 2011
Just leave the guy and move on. And don't forget to lock your doors at night

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