Your husband did not behave well by his actions but you should also know that if you had no job, he will be providing for you and the kids without complaining.
Just forgive him and move back. Unforgiveness is a burden

Romanoff:


She is not toxic. Her concerns are valid and no two human is the same.

Just cause it will be easy for you to forgive such dishonesty doesn't mean it will be easy for her.
With a husband that can scam you like that, who needs an enemy? A wife that has always supported you and is equally hardworking. What is in common 200k that he still had to scam her for?

They sha both need counselling to get past this, it won't be easy but it's doable.

That trust has been broken already so after this, going forward, please, have your own savings as you contribute to the home and family projects and keep receipts.

Next land or property you'll buy, inform him about it, carry him along but source for your own agent yourself to avoid situations like this.

The trust can't be the same again sha, but na to dey manage the situation and to avoid such in the future.

But women scam their husbands on daily basis with upkeep money and nobody packs out of the house

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

I must insult u because if I don't I will be angry with myself.i keep saying most women have fish brain .there are many ways u can collect the money from him without shouting.
1)u should have asked him to loan u money
Trick him u want to use his account when u know he has a enough then withdraw ur money and tell him stories.no matter how rich u are, rising d children alone will eat u up.life is not easy as a single mom ,forget ur financial status.ur dad is not d one, putting on d shoe

Fahvvy:
How do you forgive him?
By forgiving him na ...

Marriage is not relationship o that you can brezz in and out as you wish ...
Marriage will test and stretch you farther than anything else will ..

On a more serious note...
It's clear and glaring that you don't consider yourself as a team? ...

Let's look at your write up ...

I have always helped him in his house projects,might not be much 100k,50k,20k when need be,I never siphoned my money to myself,as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head,(3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that "we" should buy it together,I told him no,I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it,( just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller."we" did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

So even when "two have become one" you still act as if you guys are not a team ...

The only time the word "we" appeared there, it was because it was suggested by your hubby ...

So while he sees you guys as a team, you see yourself as competitors ...

Until you change your mindset, it's best you don't go back ...

I'm not trying to excuse your hubby's actions, however, if you intend to go back with this mindset of unforgiveness, disunity and distrust, just be prepared for everyday quarrel ...

And that too will affect your kids ...

She is the masculine man here that why she carries everything for head I don't support his man action but honestly someone like me will not accept such from my wife.

Stop... It's her call to forgive and let her do whatever she wants... Leave God out of this... forgiveness does not mean suffer and unhealthy mental life... If he is a real man anyways no matter what happens even if they seperate he will provide for his children... That being said forgiveness is a good thing and must be done for a healthy life but it does not mean staying with a partner that will steal money from you is the right thing to do.

A man that will steal money from his wife is not a man.

Righteousness2:
My Sister, you have a right to be angry. Yes your husband has offended you.

But because of the Blood JESUS Christ shed on the cross of Calvary for your sins and my sins, Despite all our evil and wicked lives, Forgive him. Forget about the past.

You both should together go before GOD in Prayers. Forgive yourself and Build your Home on GOD and GOD'S Principles for the Home.

I Pray for you, the Peace of GOD that passed all human Understanding take over your life and your Home in JESUS Name.

I can see the effect of your youthfulness in taking a rash decision because of 200k!

You wanna throwaway the baby with the bath water for such a small offense? I'm surprised your father is even encouraging you to crash your marriage. When you're 35, you'll surely regret this if you don't reconcile with your husband!

You broke the trust and unity when you decide you wanna buy the land alone. To most men, that signals planning for breakup or divorce.
You were looking for an excuse when you started going through his phone and you found one.

Out of sight is out of mind, if you leave, he wont come for you and soon you'd be replaced.

You married too early hence lacks maturity and temperance in resolving issues

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

Nonsense! Person wey park out dey complain say she need a father in her child's life.
Isn't that stupidity? You want something and you're doing something contrary to what you want.


Don't go and settle with your husband and live in peace allow the devil to win at the end you hear!

If anyone is telling you the truth, they'd tell you that you need to search yourself. If I was the man, I won't take you back. I'm sorry too say this. He said, let's buy land together. Your response: no, I want to buy it all for myself. Both of you are toxic to each other. But maybe you're also meant for each other. I rest my case.

culf:
Imagine the type of issue that is causing separation, its unfortunate.

You're a lady so it might mean a lot to you but do you know that most times money given to wives for one thing or another, some wives divert part of it, Oga know but won't even bother including feeding money meant for the family.
This same money causing issues, if it were to be another person, will you have known? some people don't mix business with anything and probably maybe your hubby is one that thinks everybody should pay for his service including his wife. Truth is, what he did is wrong, he should have asked for payment rather than taking it through the back door.
To me, this is not suppose to lead to any serious fight or separation.

#Some people who are not suppose to be in marriage are already married.

God will bless you for this....she felt betrayed because you saw alert of so so amount, so what? I will not be part of conspiracy that will put you into confusion and I can say it very loud and clear that someone is giving you bad advise. Listen to me op, you need to grow up. What happen is just one of the things men overlook and smile.....

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

Your unforgiveness has trust issues which is very delicate. Remember people disappoint and the only way out is accept it and don't revenge by trying to hurt him by always packing out of the house. If you leave for some weeks and he ends up finding love in another woman, you will be in a worse hatred than B4. So better forgive and forget as soon as possible. No family is perfect. People disappoint but we must always learn to forgive them revenge hatred anger they grow and the more they grow, it can lead to something far worse that can harm both of you. And especially I just learnt this today try all your best not to react to people words. Your husband loves you and wants to be with me but he could make mistake in his words towards you sometimes. Laugh over it and don't react. The Bible said in Ecclesiastes 7:20-22
20 Indeed, there is no one on earth who is righteous, no one who does what is right and never sins.
21 Do not pay attention to every word people say, or you may hear your servant cursing you—
22 for you know in your heart that many times you yourself have cursed others.

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

You continue to be the most stupid woman ever. You cannot forgive your husband for just this simple mistake and you want God to forgive you abi. You're a troublesome woman and a trouble maker. It's either you have psychological imbalance or you're ment. Seems you don't love your husband and maybe you're trying to give a new man a chance. If this your little young marriage breaks because of this.... you'll have yourself to be blamed. I can never marry a woman like you. Tufia!!!!

Riverrun:


Though you said no insult, I am sorry I would still insult you. YOU ARE A FOOLISH WOMAN.

If I was your husband, the day you packed out is the day the marriage ends for real. So when your children grow and ask you why you left their father then you open your mouth to say this nonsense you wrote up there.

Just imagine this rubbish, what your husband did was business though as family he was not supposed to add something in your case.
But all the same, the 200k he collected is still in the family.

Your husband does things for you with his money, this is normal to you.
Him benefiting from your money should not be a reason for you to throw tantrums. If you check well how he spent the money you will still see that more than 60% of that money was consumed by you directly or indirectly.

You go about disgracing your family for paltry sum. Something that can be resolved in-house, now everyone knows how wicked, unforgiving and stingy you are that even your husband had to lie to get something from you.

You are pregnant now you remember your children needs a father in their life. Why don't your money play the role of a father?

See if you know you are coming back without forgetting that matter totally you better remain where you are. Don't come and give that man headache. The poor man must have thought he married a help meet.

Infact you are vexing me, go.

I just love your boldness, this lady is arrogant and greedy

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with p and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No in.

you are nothing but a typical LovePeddler. You want to bring another man's son to the guy abi. Can you swear with your toto water and your life that you have not bleeped another preek within this period? the only thing that gave you this guts is the fact that you are already cheating. The guy that was giving you this guts is not feed up with you and you are coming back to your senses.
The fact that you said you want the land all to your self means u already have bad plans. All you need is a reason to execute the plan. Yes he messed up but this is not something that can't be resolved. I am even sure the money was still spent on you and in the house.
Idiots like u is the reason some of us will never marry any bitch that sees little cash. See her forming boss . You are for the Streets. He should just test you for STDs and do a DNA test before taking you back if not he is ON HIS OWN.

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

You are a very selfish woman sincerely... Some1 who is in competition with the husband instead of working with him...That man deserve some1 better.

My dear sister,
Pls stop crying so as not to affect the unborn child.

This is my candid advice from a fellow and older married lady.
You really need to learn to love genuinely and to forget.
I understand that it's not easy forgetting hurts, but you have to learn it.

Without a genuine forgiveness from your end,you'll always remember this issue and will continue to hate on him.

It's not too late to express yourself on how deeply hurt you are on the 200k matter.

Sis,those telling you to leave him have no "good home" or are not married.

Don't thro your marriage out to the dogs like a piece of trash.

A wise woman builds her home.

This shouldn't be up to why you would end your marriage,pls retrace your steps before it's too late,don't give room to the devil.

Registeredguest:
I'm a lady in my mid- twenties, I got married aged 22, (always wanted to marry early) on the second year of our marriage we were blessed with a baby, parked to our house and things were rosy. I have always been a workaholic due to that I have never lack as a young lady in terms of finance.

I have always helped him in his house projects, might not be much 100k, 50k, 20k when need be. I never siphoned my money to myself, as a young lady I envisioned my pretty little family on my head, (3 children, handsome husband and pretty wife with a fine car living happily)

Now to the main problem,I think it all started when he told me he has seen a genuine plot of land that we should buy it together, I told him no, I want the land all by myself I have money to pay for it, (just want to have something tangible for myself alone) he said no problem.He sent me an account number of the seller I sent 600k to the seller.we did the necessary documents and everyone was happy.

After some weeks, I decided to dig around his phone then I discovered that the account I sent the 600k to, refunded 200k back to my husband, woke him up instantly I demanded for an explanation.he story no make sense. I was heartbroken, for months I was hurt...the two families got involved and settled the issue.money I no see...

Ever since this issue happened,the home has not been peaceful, fighting everyday. I find it so difficult to forgive him. I insult him, he insults me, he broke my phone, I break his door...I was demanded for an apology he says
"I'm his wife, no be today man dey collect him wife money, he say woman go build house for him husband no ear no go hear" those things hurt me more... everyday was fight, I parked out,I went to my sister's place,he didn't call, he didn't reach out.

3 weeks after I parked I discovered I was pregnant,and informed him immediately through text.i stayed at my sister's place for 2 months no word from him... I decide to rent my own place,I rented a place and went to his house to park my remaining stuff,I meet him home,as soon as he sees I came with a truck to park my things he knelt down and started begging me...I was like,na today I commot for your house why now? He say he think say I dey play, he no think say I serious like this,for good two months you didn't say anything why now...with enough dragging I parked my things to my new rented apartment... since the day I park till now this man has not allowed me rest,his family members has been calling me to come back home, his dad came from the village to plead on his behalf.


My dad is insisting I should not go back...I'm now 6 months pregnant ,I need a father in my children's life.im finding it difficult to forgive him,I'm struggling within myself to forgive and trust this man again.

How can I let go of the past and move back with him...I decided to pay him a visit on Friday,he was happy I came,he did everything possible to show me he has changed but that feeling of betrayal and hurt is there.i left there this morning with querrell,I know I started the querrell,but I can't just seem to forgive him.please I need your help and advice on this pressing issue of mine.

No insult please, I have cried enough.

You will be able to forgive him on the condition that you don't see him as your grown up husband but as your son who need your love and correction even when it doesn't favour you. Your husband wants you back because he still loves you not because there are no other women out there. So, please forgive him and move on. If what I understand in your message is correct,

The marriage will never work. The woman's mindset is already flawed. Even if she forgives, it will not work. She is resentful. Guy papa travel come beg you, you no gree. Your papa talk say make you no go back.

The guy is a fo0ol for continuing to beg. Ontop 200k!

I personally will never beg any woman who packs her things by herself out of the house. She should just live on peace by herself, let the man find a corporative wife.

sholay2011:

God bless you.

I wonder if some of those commenting here are actually married in real life. If OP can pack out because of such, she needs to really work on herself, and that is not to excuse what her husband did. I wonder what would happen when her husband does something 'worse' in the future? In marriage, we forgive and forbear. We would offend each other. We would see the best and worst sides of each other, and that's okay. We discuss issues as two adults, and not act like kids. The husband no try at all for not contacting her for 2 months (except there is something OP is not telling us).

Nonetheless, anyone that struggles with forgiveness (no matter how right they are) is setting him or herself up for failure in marriage. OP appears to not be emotionally-balanced and needs to go for marital counselling ASAP, first, alone, then, with her husband.

She is the masculine man here that's why she had the audacity to leave my sister collected double of the amount her husband paid for a project when he found out he never cause a scan but rather laughed it off well I guess some women are built differently

If you check well, Your husband definitely still spent that 200k on house bills and other things that will still benefit you.

Not like he took your 200k to go and drink and carry women. Please we are all human beings and no one is perfect. Just forgive him because you don dey drag the matter far yourself.

Gkay1:

I just love your boldness, this lady is arrogant and greedy

I bet she is fucking other guys. Let her swear that she has not received another dick within this period

Riverrun:


Though you said no insult, I am sorry I would still insult you. YOU ARE A FOOLISH WOMAN.

If I was your husband, the day you packed out is the day the marriage ends for real. So when your children grow and ask you why you left their father then you open your mouth to say this nonsense you wrote up there.

Just imagine this rubbish, what your husband did was business though as family he was not supposed to add something in your case.
But all the same, the 200k he collected is still in the family.

Your husband does things for you with his money, this is normal to you.
Him benefiting from your money should not be a reason for you to throw tantrums. If you check well how he spent the money you will still see that more than 60% of that money was consumed by you directly or indirectly.

You go about disgracing your family for paltry sum. Something that can be resolved in-house, now everyone knows how wicked, unforgiving and stingy you are that even your husband had to lie to get something from you.

You are pregnant now you remember your children needs a father in their life. Why don't your money play the role of a father?

See if you know you are coming back without forgetting that matter totally you better remain where you are. Don't come and give that man headache. The poor man must have thought he married a help meet.

Infact you are vexing me, go.

Bless you for this truth...such a wicked and selfish women. She's doing competition with the husband.

MufasaLion:
You don't need such a stupid, lazy, insensitive and selfish man in your life or your kids'. Move on and continue to provide for yourself and your kids. He abandoned you for months and was trying to manipulate you emotionally when you went to pack things, don't be deceived.

Don't let his family's plead to deceive you. That man can never change. That's his personality and once you go back and deliver that baby, you will be trapped!

You can do well without him! Marriage is not an achievement. There are many successful people in the world raised by single mothers. Don't let the society define your happiness!

Because of 200k boss. Arh! Baba you fall hand oh!

goodmike7:
DEAR OP
PLEASE DONT FORGIVE YOUR HUSBAND OOO..NEVER
YOU ARE VERY BEAUTIFUL AND FINANCIALLY INDEPENDENT..YOU ARE VERY HOLY AND WITHOUT MISTAKE AND MEN WILL TROOP IN THEIR NUMBERS TO MARRY YOU AFTER YOU GIVE BIRTH.
YOU DONT NEED YOUR HUSBAND AND WHEN YOU REMARRY, IF THE GUY TOUCHES YOUR PURSE, PLEASE LEAVE TOO AND RENT ANOTHER APARTMENT WITH YOUR KIDS.
YOU HAVE A VERY GOOD FAMILY MEMBERS WHO ABHORS YOU FOR 2 MONTHS WITHOUT REACHING OUT TO YOUR HUSBAND
YOU HAVE A FATHER WHO ENCOURAGES YOU NOT TO GO BACK TO YOUR HUSBAND, VERY SUPPORTIVE FAMILY.
YOU DONT NEED A MAN.
I LIKE YOUR COMPETITIVE SPIRIT OF OWNING YOUR THINHS AND 200K IS WAY WORTH A DIVORCE FROM A MAN WHO TOLD YOU ABOUT A PROPERTY, ENCOURAGED YOU YO BUY IT AND GAVE YOU THE NECESSARY DOCUMENTATION IN YOUR NAME OOO.

WELL DONE.

braine:
The marriage will never work. The woman's mindset is already flawed. Even if she forgives, it will not work. She is resentful. Guy papa travel come beg you, you no gree. Your papa talk say make you no go back.

The guy is a fo0ol for continuing to beg. Ontop 200k!

I personally will never beg any woman who packs her things by herself out of the house. She should just live on peace by herself, let the man find a corporative wife.

na another preek wey she dey Bleep give am the guts. Like always the guy don knack am and tire and dumb am and she don come back to her senses

kologba:
if u cant trust him again then move on with ur life afterall u got children,the new born baby u will take care of him or her since u are financially stable..enjoy ur life as a single mother....na be everybody get grave 4 marriage... U dey 4llow man dragg

Don't deceive her her and try to bring Feminism into the matter.I am sure you're not married.

Rozross:
You readily forgive those you love without a doubting spirit. You are kind of toxic, even me that like trouble dont know how to keep grudges, before the next day as e long reach, i've forgotten that we even had issues. Marriage isnt relationship, learn to accept your partner's flaws and weaknesses and forgive them each time their weaknesses is taking it's toll on them. This one isn't even a big issue sef, its you who has been complicating things. He's sorry and begging you for forgiveness and you still dont want to forgive him, what else do you want? His head? Abeg work on your unforgiven spirit.

ah this slutt get sense like this? It's like you are now drinking healthy cum o

Dear lady, if you want a father figure for your children as stated, you need to forgive your husband. The other option is to harden your heart and focus on being a single mother.

Sincerely, I think you should forgive and know how best to handle your finances if you still don't trust him. However, there's nothing wrong with helping your husband with your money. You're partners in marriage and your children benefit spiritually and physically from whatever you do. We're supposed to be helpmates as designed by God. Just be circumspect about it since some men choose to act like demons.
If you build a house together, insist on registering in both names not just Mr and Mrs XYZ. Any woman is automatically Mrs except your names are clearly stated.
I'm happy that there's no domestic violence involved. You should be able to jointly build a good home for your kids if you can forgive and restrategise.

I'm not married and I'm not going to insult you but you see that thing called marriage particular the one we so much called the happy one have a lot of things going on behind the scene, it's the ability to settle and not things escalate to the point of no return that solidify the union.

As a rule of thumb, I've always maintain that if a man and his newly wedded wife can see out the first five years of their marital life without letting anything out to the face of the general public, that union may be up for a greater things.

Remember, I've never been married but I've stayed with married folks to have know one or two things about conjugal bliss.


And hey, I wish you peace and light.

Maxhappy01:

Don't deceive her her and try to bring Feminism into the matter.I am sure you're not married.

if you check her now, she go ugky and fat and shapeless like amoeba . And no guy want am. So she want carry other girls along

eyinjuege:


Please stop trying to sugar coat theft and dishonesty.
A man that will lie beside you, exchange bodily fluids with you and then collide with an outsider to defraud you can do and undo, so I understand where OP is coming from.
He's just opened his wife up for his friends, relatives and associates to try and defraud her.
While I would advise her to forgive her husband, if she isn't ready to do so, don't try to make her the toxic one here.
That man has destroyed the trust in their marriage and its just a shell there at the moment.
It will take time to build the trust back
And please don't go into marriage with the mindset of defrauding your wife. It never ends well, and vice versa

Awesome submission.

Another angle I gleaned from your submission is the paraphrase "colluding with an outsider to defraud her"....

This thread na wisdom-filled elders council...

You left your marriage over money that cannot buy iPhone 13. This is why I tell men to work hard and stay off women who earn higher. This is not low esteem, this is reality. She won’t respect you if she feeds you. She won’t be sexually attracted to you if she doesn’t need you. Opting to buy that land on your own name alone shows you had your plans to run off. The last minute pregnancy is the spoiler here.

culf:
Imagine the type of issue that is causing separation, its unfortunate.

You're a lady so it might mean a lot to you but do you know that most times money given to wives for one thing or another, some wives divert part of it, Oga know but won't even bother including feeding money meant for the family.
This same money causing issues, if it were to be another person, will you have known? some people don't mix business with anything and probably maybe your hubby is one that thinks everybody should pay for his service including his wife. Truth is, what he did is wrong, he should have asked for payment rather than taking it through the back door.
To me, this is not suppose to lead to any serious fight or separation.

#Some people who are not suppose to be in marriage are already married.

No one will pay agency fee of 200k over land of 400k it's pure scam and dishonesty , he should have begged his wife for money or borrowed from her, with this his attitude it means if she dies before him the children will suffer and be deprived of what legitimately is hers under his watch. @Registeredguest