cassyrooy:
I object.

If your offence would have cost me my life, I'll come for you, even if years after.

Too much forgiveness dey make people dey senseless.

You walking away after the years is a wiser idea bruv!

KalioPeter:




Please I'm just a 17yrs old boy.

I would really appreciate your guidance and advice towards life.

I am willing to share my challenges with you if you can couch me on how to face them.

I need you to walk me through life, I've made and currently making mistakes in my life

It's cool you want a coach but trust me you still have time to make mistakes and the most important thing is to correct them. And also at least once in a day try to look at the world we are living in and try to see it from different perspective. Look at how you can balance your spiritual, mental and financial world and also control your emotions and in extension your desires. The most important is financial and try as much as possible to make money albeit legally no matter how small their is dignity and labour and joy in earning money you work for. Because even though money isn't an end but it's a means to all the life you want. And sometime when you are overwhelmed with problem, put it in a perspective of life like can this problem kill me? If it can't just try and solve it and it will pass. That perspective will help you to see that the problem that is overwhelming is just something small because whether we like it or not number thing for us as human is survival so anything that wouldn't threaten your life isn't much of a problem that way you will even be calm enough to solve the problem to the best of your ability unlike when you try to solve it under pressure.

fattprince:

It's cool you want a coach but trust me you still have time to make mistakes and the most important thing is to correct them. And also at least once in a day try to look at the world we are living in and try to see it from different perspective. Look at how you can balance your spiritual, mental and financial world and also control your emotions and in extension your desires. The most important is financial and try as much as possible to make money albeit legally no matter how small their is dignity and labour and joy in earning money you work for. Because even though money isn't an end but it's a means to all the life you want. And sometime when you are overwhelmed with problem, put it in a perspective of life like can this problem kill me? If it can't just try and solve it and it will pass. That perspective will help you to see that the problem that is overwhelming is just something small because whether we like it or not number thing for us as human is survival so anything that wouldn't threaten your life isn't much of a problem that way you will even be calm enough to solve the problem to the best of your ability unlike when you try to solve it under pressure.

I get to meet people like you once in my lifetime.

You are a wise person and I really appreciate you.


The problem I'm having is trying to balance my personal life with my social life, I've been trying really hard to blend in.

I'm not a social guy, and I don't keep a lot of people/friends around me.
I'm forced to go out to face the world everyday because I need money to survive.

I feel weak, by things I see daily, I hardly ever stay in a particular place for long, I find it hard to handle challenge, and I'm too kind and soft hearted even for my liking.

I have got my family to think of now, my poor Mom and siblings.

Dshocker:
You forgot to add that one should avoid bet9ja

Like a plague.

KalioPeter:




Please I'm just a 17yrs old boy.

I would really appreciate your guidance and advice towards life.

I am willing to share my challenges with you if you can couch me on how to face them.

I need you to walk me through life, I've made and currently making mistakes in my life

How time flies. I was your age some 5 years ago. I wish I wasn't the first child, I would have avoided some costly mistakes I made.

Btw, I have no advise to give, but avoid and despise betting/gambling if you want to be useful in life.

Chenult:



How time flies. I was your age some 5 years ago. I wish I wasn't the first child, I would have avoided some costly mistakes I made.

Btw, I have no advise to give, but avoid and despise betting/gambling if you want to be useful in life.

That is your own mistakes, what if he has a big chances of getting rich by betting, I’ve seen and know a lot of big dudes that made it out of betting...I’m not promoting betting but he tries it and he noticed he’s not winning then he should quit, I still don’t understand how people got addicted to betting, maybe becos of the free money but I tell you it depends on the individual

pansophist:
1. If I magically become a twenty-year-old again, I will never go to a traditional university, I will instead, go to NOUN (national open university of Nigeria) or study online in a free online university (''uopeople'' is a good one) so I will have a lot of free time, then start a business along the way, make all the mistakes necessary and succeed in it. This way, I kill two birds with one stone. A degree and a career that sets me up for life and makes me attractive and respected in my 30s. And it's cheaper too, without the distraction of strikes, cultism, too expensive, the temptation of prostitution, etc. 

2. If you want to understand human nature, politics, women, society, and how power structures work, study the animal jungle. Animals will reveal to you the true nature of humans without the mask of laws, civility, and democracy (lol). 

3. By default, trust no one. And if they give you reasons not to trust them, believe them. If you come to trust them through proven track records that span a reasonable amount of time, still make sure you have a safe landing if things go bad. 

4. Everybody is trying to capture your mind. Guard it with your life. Your mind is like an engine or a computer OS, if it is corrupt, the whole system will be. An example of a captured mind is he who cannot think for himself. 

5. You should know that you are paying a very dangerous price if you refuse to man up, get your shit together, and put in the work. The world is very unforgivable to weak people who prefer comfort, and your refusal to work hard will sink you at the bottom of the food chain, of which you would have been older, fatter, maybe smarter due to experiences, but poorer, and irrelevant. 

6.  Your 20's will only be the time you will be free. From your 30s, society will not be soft on you the way you are soft on yourself. If you are broke, girls will ignore you, friends will not respect you, and your esteem will be low. And other successful people will rent your life to advance their interests. And it will only go worse from there. And as a man, by default, you are on your own. 

7. The earlier you start to run, the quicker you reach the finish line, rest, and enjoy. if your parents are still sponsoring you in your 20s, it is not an excuse to be lazy. Face life as a man, because it gets harder as you grow older. 

8. Look for a woman you hate with a passion, then buy a house for her, a car, and maintain the house until you die. This is the pain that awaits you if you marry a woman who lies, manipulates, and is a deceiver because the body is what attracts you instead of the character. 

9. Your biggest enemies will always be those in your inner circle. It is difficult to be envious of someone you don't know, who didn't watch grow from zero to hero. haters are harmless idiots who hate from afar, but envy is within. More people have been killed and backstabbed by those who know them than by strangers. 

10. In anything you do, make sure that you are able to look at yourself in the mirror and have peace within. You might get away with treating people wrongly, but nothing will torment the soul more than your conscience. Conversely, nothing will burn your soul more than allowing injustice to be done to you because you have no teeth. Grow some teeth, and make sure you can use them, and that single act of deterrence will scare the dangers of this world away from you. 

11. You have to be awake to outsmart women. Women by nature are next level' more socially aware than men, so it takes a conscious effort for most men to see themselves through the eyes of women. You will probably spend your life permanently with one, so it worth spending time (and resources) to know them.

12. Have a war mindset, because whether you like it or not, you are in a fight by default. Life is a battle that you win before going to the battleground. A battleground merely confirms your victory. A sheep and a lion don't have to enter the ring before we know that the lion has won.

nawa o
people dey come drop small snippets for this thread make we use hold body. you just come drop Nuclear bomb. the type wey even Putin no get.

na because of people like you I login into nairaland

thank you

KingClown:


nawa o
people dey come drop small snippets for this thread make we use hold body. you just come drop Nuclear bomb. the type wey even Putin no get.

na because of people like you I login into nairaland

thank you

Man shall not live by bread alone. Rather, he lives on every word that comes from the mouth of the Eternal One. Mathew 4.4

KalioPeter:




Please I'm just a 17yrs old boy.

I would really appreciate your guidance and advice towards life.

I am willing to share my challenges with you if you can couch me on how to face them.

I need you to walk me through life, I've made and currently making mistakes in my life

I didn't receive an email from you yet. I hope you are okay. Preferably, you may write your query here if it's not personal, so others can contribute/learn.

I'm currently a victim of no 1 ... I've adjusted tho ... I hope life gives me another chance

You forgot to add say no to drugs ( learnt both this year ) and I'm at that very age you mentioned so I think I have time to adjust ... thanks for the advice

pansophist:


I didn't receive an email from you yet. I hope you are okay. Preferably, you may write your query here if it's not personal, so others can contribute/learn.

I'm sorry, I had problems with my Email.


Well, it's a faceless forum, so I guess I can pour out my worries here.


I'm really confused Sir, I don't know what I'm doing anymore.
Firstly, I grew up without a father, my dad left when I was just 3yrs.
I am the only male child and have four sisters.
My Mom is getting old now and still struggling to put food on the table for us, also trying to provide the necessary things we need.

All my life, I've only struggled and fight for everything I have.
I don't like to wallow in my pain and cry all day.
I believe I just have to keep working hard.


Recently, I've been thinking and I can't help but think that all my efforts are not bearing any fruits.
My Mom is getting old and still fighting, I can't look at my Mom and smile anymore.
She's all lean now, a result of stressing a lot.

I depressed and frustrated too, the only son yet I can't do anything to change the condition of my family.
I am always shy and scared to speak up, I've been taken advantage of several times, I don't know what to do anymore
I'm tired of everything all ready.


Even my own Uncle abandoned us, his own sister (My Mom).
I've been insulted and looked down on.
But all that has never made me stop, or cared less.

Now, I'm just trying to fit in this Port Harcourt, trying to find my way around.
I don't even want to talk about my relationship status because I suck on that aspect.

I'm still trying to conquer the addiction of smoking

A lot of things I can't explain

@ kaliopeter How old are you and your sisters?

pansophist:
@ kaliopeter How old are you and your sisters?

I'm 17, two elder sisters are 22 and 19 and my two junior sisters are 15 and 11

KalioPeter:



I'm 17, two elder sisters are 22 and 19 and my two junior sisters are 15 and 11

. It's a good thing that Youngin like you needs help at this stage to move forward. fr�
I'm just reading this.
though you're still young and you're talking about relationship status. Tf?
Well, come out of that, is too early.
even At this point you feel pressure. It feels bad.
What would have put 98% of kids in the street if not for the pressure? Trust me there are a lot of things out there you would want to know, but later regret, if you keep putting your mind on them, and these things are the unhealthy things you see here on earth... Flew away from them....don't let those things bother your mind. what you need is Christ to overcome those fear you're facing and there you have sisters that are ahead of you, who can still be supportive. I finish secondary school at 16-17 then so guess you guys are no longer in ( sec school). There are a lot of things out there your sisters can venture into, like working, etc, or maybe if they have skills they can start from somewhere small.
Not by any means. Don't get me wrong, and also you need to survive and you guys should take care of your mom. There's nothing like her on this earth, I mean nothing can replace her. Though she's getting older. you were born into a poor home and because of that, you need to work hard.
basically for example you need money to go to school and to buy stuff like that. So you have to labor to have this thing to get prepared for the following day. Unlike you who was born in a family of a silver spoon, some kids were lucky because they were born into a rich home,".But some ain't. Do you feel me? So that's why you need to go get it.
Quit smoking and look for something to do important that will save you from the future. thou You're smart.

Cravemore:
. It's a good thing that Youngin like you needs help at this stage to move forward. fr�
I'm just reading this.
though you're still young and you're talking about relationship status. Tf?
Well, come out of that, is too early.
even At this point you feel pressure. It feels bad.
What would have put 98% of kids in the street if not for the pressure? Trust me there are a lot of things out there you would want to know, but later regret, if you keep putting your mind on them, and these things are the unhealthy things you see here on earth... Flew away from them....don't let those things bother your mind. what you need is Christ to overcome those fear you're facing and there you have sisters that are ahead of you, who can still be supportive. I finish secondary school at 16-17 then so guess you guys are no longer in ( sec school). There are a lot of things out there your sisters can venture into, like working, etc, or maybe if they have skills they can start from somewhere small.
Not by any means. Don't get me wrong, and also you need to survive and you guys should take care of your mom. There's nothing like her on this earth, I mean nothing can replace her. Though she's getting older. you were born into a poor home and because of that, you need to work hard.
basically for example you need money to go to school and to buy stuff like that. So you have to labor to have this thing to get prepared for the following day. Unlike you who was born in a family of a silver spoon, some kids were lucky because they were born into a rich home,".But some ain't. Do you feel me? So that's why you need to go get it.
Quit smoking and look for something to do important that will save you from the future. thou You're smart.

Thanks a lot, I really appreciate your advice and kind words.


I'm on the path to changing my ways for the better, I believe everything would work accordingly.
It won't be easy, but I believe it would work

KalioPeter:



I'm 17, two elder sisters are 22 and 19 and my two junior sisters are 15 and 11

Damn, you're sandwiched between women. Two for front, two for back. Who you offend na?

But you have one thing most people don't have, and it's age. You're 17, you're a baby. I can remember being 17, and I know nothing. How I see the world now is completely different.

But regardless, my advice applies to you. A wealthy family background may be a launchpad to success, but ultimately, your destiny is in your hands. I'll advice you don't go university in Nigeria, except NOUN, then use your time wisely.

It is tempting to join your friends in uni, partying and sleeping with many women, but the price you pay for that is your future, especially that you have no support from family.

Also, don't stress yourself with family issues financially, except your mum. Others should go hustle, because if you let them rest their financial burden on you, it will slow you down on your path to salvation, and also handicap their ability to fend for themselves, and make you an enemy if you can't/refuse to meet up. So. Don't start what you can't finish.

So as you are studying, pick a business and start it. You're not too young. Start small and let your business grow with your age. Many global companies were started by teenagers, think of stripes, ikea etc. Don't underestimate your self.

This will do for now. I'll follow up when you give a response to this.

pansophist:


Damn, you're sandwiched between women. Two for front, two for back. Who you offend na?

But you have one thing most people don't have, and it's age. You're 17, you're a baby. I can remember being 17, and I know nothing. How I see the world now is completely different.

But regardless, my advice applies to you. A wealthy family background may be a launchpad to success, but ultimately, your destiny is in your hands. I'll advice you don't go university in Nigeria, except NOUN, then use your time wisely.

It is tempting to join your friends in uni, partying and sleeping with many women, but the price you pay for that is your future, especially that you have no support from family.

Also, don't stress yourself with family issues financially, except your mum. Others should go hustle, because if you let them rest their financial burden on you, it will slow you down on your path to salvation, and also handicap their ability to fend for themselves, and make you an enemy if you can't/refuse to meet up. So. Don't start what you can't finish.

So as you are studying, pick a business and start it. You're not too young. Start small and let your business grow with your age. Many global companies were started by teenagers, think of stripes, ikea etc. Don't underestimate your self.

This will do for now. I'll follow up when you give a response to this.

What business do you think someone like him could opt for?

Good evening.

ThiagoKid:


What business do you think someone like him could opt for?

Good evening.

Opt for businesses that are not financially intensive to start, can be scaled through tech, and are skilled-based. The nature of the business should not be the type where if you are not there to do it yourself, it won't grow (eg barbing, uber driver,).

I will use fashion design as an example. If you learn fashion (skill-base), you can start with a shop or even make it in your bedroom, establish in your community, while simultaneously putting your designs on social media to showcase and gain publicity, and as more people know you, you hire more hands and have bigger stores.

Lots of multi-million dollar brands started like this, a notable one will be ''grass-fields'' (check it out on Instagram). These Cameroonian girls sew their clothes in Nigeria (employing other people of course) and sell them globally through their online shop, You can go into jeans sewing for example, and sell online, expand and just grow big. Step by step.

You have DHL to ship for you globally or use services like Afrikrea.com (like Amazon for fashion designers). Or just search for how to make an online shop on youtube, it's easy. I have designed several online stops myself with no tech background, and use payment gateways like paystack.

Another example will be a food kiosk/stand. Start then structure it in a way that you can have many shops. Lots of people are doing it with shawarma spots, but have your targets on the bigger picture. Those who own KFC, or chicken republic all have stories, you can do it too, even better.

I know lots of people do these variations of businesses, but I don't want to mention names. But look around you, those who are living large don't have two heads, they are just more disciplined, hardworking, have visions, and can delay gratifications. So you may come to realize that the difficulties you will experience are more in you, not out there. It is more difficult to rule yourself than to rule a city. (Proverbs 16.32).


Read this topic, and also the second comment, I ponder why you should start early because time is all you have. Do not waste your youth partying, tame yourself. Especially if you have nothing to fall back on. Only you can lead yourself to salvation. You might realize that your 20s will only be when you will be free, and how you spend it will determine how the world will relate to you in your 30s and above.

https://www.nairaland.com/7249793/early-20s-need-read

pansophist:


Opt for businesses that are not financially intensive to start, can be scaled through tech, and are skilled-based. The nature of the business should not be the type where if you are not there to do it yourself, it won't grow (eg barbing, uber driver,).

I will use fashion design as an example. If you learn fashion (skill-base), you can start with a shop or even make it in your bedroom, establish in your community, while simultaneously putting your designs on social media to showcase and gain publicity, and as more people know you, you hire more hands and have bigger stores.

Lots of multi-million dollar brands started like this, a notable one will be ''grass-fields'' (check it out on Instagram). These Cameroonian girls sew their clothes in Nigeria (employing other people of course) and sell them globally through their online shop, You can go into jeans sewing for example, and sell online, expand and just grow big. Step by step.

You have DHL to ship for you globally or use services like Afrikrea.com (like Amazon for fashion designers). Or just search for how to make an online shop on youtube, it's easy. I have designed several online stops myself with no tech background, and use payment gateways like paystack.

Another example will be a food kiosk/stand. Start then structure it in a way that you can have many shops. Lots of people are doing it with shawarma spots, but have your targets on the bigger picture. Those who own KFC, or chicken republic all have stories, you can do it too, even better.

I know lots of people do these variations of businesses, but I don't want to mention names. But look around you, those who are living large don't have two heads, they are just more disciplined, hardworking, have visions, and can delay gratifications. So you may come to realize that the difficulties you will experience are more in you, not out there. It is more difficult to rule yourself than to rule a city. (Proverbs 16.32).


Read this topic, and also the second comment, I ponder why you should start early because time is all you have. Do not waste your youth partying, tame yourself. Especially if you have nothing to fall back on. Only you can lead yourself to salvation. You might realize that your 20s will only be when you will be free, and how you spend it will determine how the world will relate to you in your 30s and above.

https://www.nairaland.com/7249793/early-20s-need-read

Fascinating.
That food option is still feasible. Do you have any other options?

That thread was stupendous and worth the read. Thanks.

You've been of the opinion that young ones should not waste their time and resource going to tertiary universities, but should in it stead, opt for NOUN or any online education.

I look up details about the NOUN and found out that you illegible to serve going through that route. Isn't it a thing of worry?

ThiagoKid:



Fascinating.
That food option is still feasible. Do you have any other options?

That thread was stupendous and worth the read. Thanks.

You've been of the opinion that young ones should not waste their time and resource going to tertiary universities, but should in it stead, opt for NOUN or any online education.

I look up details about the NOUN and found out that you illegible to serve going through that route. Isn't it a thing of worry?

Lots of business you can do. Female product is another one. You can never go wrong selling things women want like hair, make-up, female wears, in fact anything related to women.

Women directly or indirectly control at least 85 percent of consumer purchasing, so that industry is a cash cow on its own. Lots of business will crash if not for women such as cinema, hotels, entertainment etc.

Men may not spend money on other men, but will spend money on women, and women will also spend their money on themselves. So plant your trap and cash out in your corner.

You should be spending all your data on YouTube learning about about to start and grow a business from scratch/nothing. I can tell you with pure certainty that money is everywhere, but only few people discipline themselves enough to cash out.

About not going to school, please do if you want to major in things that requires physical presence such as medicine, but for the vast majority of courses out there, you can learn from your bedroom via internet. It's all about your discipline.

About nysc, it all depends on you. Why do it if you don't need it? If you want to go into politics, then maybe. I didn't do it. You must not just follow things blindly, think it out and determine if it fits into your life plan.

And please start quick, time goes as fast as possible. I can literally remember ten years ago like it was last year, and to make the past memorable, progress is the answer. Unless you get to the point where you have more regrets than hope, you'll never know the beauty of your youth.

If anyone wants a free hosting of your business/brand website, I can help add you for free on my web hosting platform. I use siteground.com.

This should save you millions of naira, depending on the sophisticatedness of your site. I'll like to see youth grow and become better. This is your age for adventure, not hedonism. Go out there, fail and fail again, then be successful.

But you'll have to look at YouTube on designing the website yourself. It's not difficult if you spend time watching tutorials. Or pay someone on places like fiverr or up work. Or import free templates from astra themes.

pansophist:
If anyone wants a free hosting of your business/brand website, I can help add you for free on my web hosting platform. I use siteground.com.

This should save you millions of naira, depending on the sophisticatedness of your site. I'll like to see youth grow and become better. This is your age for adventure, not hedonism. Go out there, fail and fail again, then be successful.

But you'll have to look at YouTube on designing the website yourself. It's not difficult if you spend time watching tutorials. Or pay someone on places like fiverr or up work. Or import free templates from astra themes.

Hello sir can I also tap into this opportunity, I just bought a domain name for my business

Maxxim:

Hello sir can I also tap into this opportunity, I just bought a domain name for my business

Yea, I can add you if you give me the DNS details. Send me an email

pansophist:


Yea, I can add you if you give me the DNS details. Send me an email

Alright thanks sir, I'll send you very soon

pansophist:


Lots of business you can do. Female product is another one. You can never go wrong selling things women want like hair, make-up, female wears, in fact anything related to women.

Women directly or indirectly control at least 85 percent of consumer purchasing, so that industry is a cash cow on its own. Lots of business will crash if not for women such as cinema, hotels, entertainment etc.

Men may not spend money on other men, but will spend money on women, and women will also spend their money on themselves. So plant your trap and cash out in your corner.

You should be spending all your data on YouTube learning about about to start and grow a business from scratch/nothing. I can tell you with pure certainty that money is everywhere, but only few people discipline themselves enough to cash out.

About not going to school, please do if you want to major in things that requires physical presence such as medicine, but for the vast majority of courses out there, you can learn from your bedroom via internet. It's all about your discipline.

About nysc, it all depends on you. Why do it if you don't need it? If you want to go into politics, then maybe. I didn't do it. You must not just follow things blindly, think it out and determine if it fits into your life plan.

And please start quick, time goes as fast as possible. I can literally remember ten years ago like it was last year, and to make the past memorable, progress is the answer. Unless you get to the point where you have more regrets than hope, you'll never know the beauty of your youth.

Enormous. Thanks for this.

I'm still trying to narrow down to a less saturated niche.
An area where many people are yet to discover. You see, about that selling of female products; clothes precisely, is been done by every Tom, Dick and Harry, in Nigeria.

Open your WhatsApp software, go to status and most things you will see there are those stuff. But still, i understand where you are coming from.

"Many are called, but few are chosen."

If time permit you, or in your leisure time; i would like us to come up with a list of feasible skills/jobs youths can engage in.



By the way, do you have any advice/suggestion(s) for someone who has a flair for writing?

Thanks, again.

Stedygrowth:
14. Discover yourself before you chose a course to study
15. Date yourself first, before you date anyone.
16. Read everyday, at least one page a day.
17. In every decision you take, make sure it propells you to your goal. If it doesn't, leave it.
18. Never fall in love with someone you don't know, no matter how you feel about him or her. If you want to love him/her, start by knowing him or her (friendship)
19. If you don't like something don't think about it, if you think about it so much, you give it life and it becomes your reality.
20. Put aside something everyday, even if it is one naira.
21. Always proof read before you summit your write up, no matter how sure you are.

Wisdom choke!