MrBrownJay1:


ok and as i keep saying....
it does not matter what a rape victim does, thats all on her, but if she claims (to the whole world) that she was raped then she can either tell the whole story or keep quiet.... but saying half of a story that will have these rapists continue doing their evil deed, is not only a waste of time but moreso, a validation to rapists that they can keep on raping (as victims will protect their identity).

the problem of rape in Africa is very simple: if you are gonna claim it happened then you must bring these criminals to justice . if you dont want to do so but wanna play victim, then no wonder most men (like the ones posting on this thread) dont believe these women's story... and they might as well keep quiet and not get shamed by these doubters.

i cant blame these doubters from feeling the way they do, when women keep protecting these so called rapist... thus why i stated that women are part of this whole problem of rape in Africa!

You still don't get my drift! In all my posting on this thread, there are two words I stressed on all the time. Go back and read all of my 5 or 6 postings.

Well fine, coming out to say that she was raped means absolutely nothing to many.....What will you and I do about the half message? It means nothing to me neither.

But had the interviewer asked her if she is willing to share more information then it's a different thing entirely. Don't ever underestimate the relief such small let out can do psychologically to people's spirit.

Sometimes, people knowingly or unknowingly give out snippet of what trauma they are going through because it makes them feel good.

If I'm close to her or know her in person, what I would do is to encourage and/or empowers her because I know for a fact that the girls-child are not adequately protected in this our part of the world and they bottled up a lot that affects them.

My point is the women folks generally needs encouragement and empowerment to voice out a lot of things. That's why they are called weaker sxx.

Would you forget about her for a minute!
How many of her type in similar situations even have the courage to say she was been raped? Let alone telling the full gist you want to hear? You and I are not the appropriate authority to request for further "gossips".

What we can do instead is admonished her to report to the police if she hadn't done that already! It's not about how we feel! If we want to get the culprit, is it you and I that is authorized to do that??

Look, I know someone that had similar issue, got depressed and died because the society esp. men that she wouldn't give in to started ridiculing her.

It's a tough position to be in.

BRATISLAVA:
What is the ratio of false rape accusations to actual rape? We can't use three women who falsely accused few men of rape recently to judge that all women who say they were raped are blackmailing a guy for the hell of it. Why don't we have the same reaction to the numerous cases of rape, why is it only the minority angle that should determine if a woman was raped or not and draw reactions from men? Why do only fringe cases decide rape cases for men? What're they scared of admitting?

false rape accusation is a big deal, so as much as we shouldnt generalize, we should also understand people who do not believe in these rape accusations because of the female criminals that falsely accused men of rape. its a double edge sword!

There are few women who will come out and say they were raped due to the backlash. And worse if they say who, then the boys brigade will say that she's trying to bring down a successful man, why didn't she say it when he was poor? Forgetting that his fame keeps rubbing salt in the wounds. When they tell half the story it's because they still need to air it while preserving their mental health, because listeners will turn it on them instead. The rape apology is deafening.

there are no two ways to solve the rape issue in Africa... whether the rapist is a rich famous man or a unknown beggar. all the above reasons you stated are genuine but the ultimate goal should be to stop rapes once and for all...and the only way to do so is to swallow your feelings (aka stigma/backlash etc) and DO WHATS RIGHT!

There's no pleasing 98% of Nigerian men. As you clearly can see on this thread, not to talk of the hundreds of threads that prove the fact daily. It is why they won't tell the full story.

if the above is the case then these women should therefore understand/accept the fact that A) RAPIST WILL NEVER BE BROUGHT TO JUSTICE and subsequently B) RAPE WILL CONTINUE FPREVER AND EVER

CaptainFM1:
You still don't get my drift! In all my posting on this thread, there are two words I stressed on all the time. Go back and read all of my 5 or 6 postings.
Well fine, coming out to say that she was raped means absolutely nothing to many.....What will you and I do about the half message? It means nothing to me neither.
But had the interviewer asked her if she is willing to share more information then it's a different thing entirely. Don't ever underestimate the relief such small let out can do psychologically to people's spirit.
Sometimes, people knowingly or unknowingly give out snippet of what trauma they are going through because it makes them feel good.
If I'm close to her or know her in person, what I would do is to encourage and/or empowers her because I know for a fact that the girls-child are not adequately protected in this our part of the world and they bottled up a lot that affects them.
My point is the women folks generally needs encouragement and empowerment to voice out a lot of things. That's why they are called weaker sxx.
Would you forget about her for a minute!
How many of her type in similar situations even have the courage to say she was been raped? Let alone telling the full gist you want to hear? You and I are not the appropriate authority to request for further "gossips".
What we can do instead is admonished her to report to the police if she hadn't done that already! It's not about how we feel! If we want to get the culprit, is it you and I that is authorized to do that??
Look, I know someone that had similar issue, got depressed and died because the society esp. men that she wouldn't give in to started ridiculing her.

It's a tough position to be in.

we have to be objective here and ask the "important" questions...
A) how do we solve the rape issue in Africa?
B) is the silence of victims more important than the stigma/backlash of accusing someone of rape?
C) isnt it strange that a great deal of women in Nigeria say they lost their virginity through rape? if true indeed then the country must be filled with rapist, and therefore the problem is bigger than i can imagine...?
D) what do you believe is a proper solution to this issue...?

IMHO the solution lies in prosecuting more and more rapists (when rape is proven beyond reasonable doubts) and as more rapists go to jail, the community willl slowly understand that A) rape isnt a crime that goes unpunished and B) women will be more comfortable in telling their story.

Sucre6:
I pity the poor husband, sex can never be fun with this kinda woman ever, she would always cry during the session and u may end up.hating yourself for even having sex with her,

Na lie! It might be the other way round.

MrBrownJay1:


we have to be objective here and ask the "important" questions...
A) how do we solve the rape issue in Africa?
B) is the silence of victims more important than the stigma/backlash of accusing someone of rape?
C) isnt it strange that a great deal of women in Nigeria say they lost their virginity through rape? if true indeed then the country must be filled with rapist, and therefore the problem is bigger than i can imagine...?
D) what do you believe is a proper solution to this issue...?

IMHO the solution lies in prosecuting more and more rapists (when rape is proven beyond reasonable doubts) and as more rapists go to jail, the community willl slowly understand that A) rape isnt a crime that goes unpunished and B) women will be more comfortable in telling their story.

How do you know she has not reported? Are you the appropriate authority to report to?
Or is TVC or Nairaland the appropriate authority? I've raised all the issues regarding objectivism. The appropriate authorities are the civil authorities. Gawd! I can't believe I'm writing this all over again. This you not read that in my previous post?

CaptainFM1:
How do you know she has not reported? Are you the appropriate authority to report to?
Or is TVC or Nairaland the appropriate authority? I've raised all the issues regarding objectivism. The appropriate authorities are the civil authorities. Gawd! I can't believe I'm writing this all over again. This you not read that in my previous post?

you 1st come up with reasons as to why these women are not saying anything and/or not telling these rapist names (aka stigma, backlash, rich famous rapist bla bla bla) yet coming to social media with their stories... and when i tell you that this is irrelevant to the issue at hand, you are now writing more irrelevant points...like the irrelevant above post. no wonder this is is going nowhere in Africa..

you sir/madam, are not bringing anything constructive to this discussion and certainly aint objective on the subject.... so i will let you believe that all these women are victims and/or all of them are acting perfectly in order to solve this rape issue in Africa. all is well.
may you have a fantastic afternoon.

MrBrownJay1

false rape accusation is a big deal, so as much as we shouldnt generalize, we should also understand people who do not believe in these rape accusations because of the female criminals that falsely accused men of rape. its a double edge sword!

"Female criminals", but male rapists don't face as much scrutiny as a woman who says she was raped. In fact, they aren't called criminals. It is the victim that faces the court of public opinion when the case is reported. Like what's going on here.

How many false accusers are there compared to male rapists on a daily basis that those fringe accusation cases are considered the norm in male circles and such a big deal? Look at it this way. Some jilted men go around lying that they did in fact have sex with a certain lady and she did this and that. Should these criminal men be used as the standard for what happens when women turn down men? Or should facts be used over such narrow sentiment?

there are no two ways to solve the rape issue in Africa... whether the rapist is a rich famous man or a unknown beggar. all the above reasons you stated are genuine but the ultimate goal should be to stop rapes once and for all...and the only way to do so is to swallow your feelings (aka stigma/backlash etc) and DO WHATS RIGHT!

The blame of rape doesn't fall on the victim. You should've mentioned reorienting men to stop raping, to stop feeling so entitled and in particular to stop shaming, stop victim blaming in whatever form especially when disguised as harmless advice or apathy. Men expect everyone who comes across it to believe it's a false accusation without any proof, but once a woman is raped they want to see the sex tape and more.

No woman will come out under the environment men have fostered about rape. When they do what you say, look at the comments on the thread for why it's better they don't. Even you don't believe the woman in the OP. You have your "doubts". These doubts are probably only used on female rape victims. You would believe a male claimant without hesitation. Wonder why the advocacy of men is only on false rape when the statistics show that men raping— not accusing —women is a by far bigger menace to society.

Perhaps you should see why sentencing differs.

Perhaps men should start doing what is right and speaking against evil wherever they see it. When a man is raped you want women's support. When a woman is raped you want her to defend herself against the boys brigade.

if the above is the case then these women should therefore understand/accept the fact that A) RAPIST WILL NEVER BE BROUGHT TO JUSTICE and subsequently B) RAPE WILL CONTINUE FPREVER AND EVER

Rape will continue until men are made responsible. From what one sees on this thread, majority of men are rapists and rape apologists. Not because they've been raped, but it's baseless revenge they appear to be having, because a few guys were accused of rape falsely. And, frankly, that is so sentimental it's a shame to see.

If these guys discover their sister or mother was raped, they must remember to vomit all their comments on this thread at them. They should remember that their sister or mother is a false rape accuser. And that is far worse than rape.

May WHATABOUTISM not be the death of male intellect.

Godsonkemz:
This has become women's usual anthem when asked about their virginity.

Hahahhahahaha oh my God you understand that gender wela

Na when them no see husband
Again
De go come dey lie lie say this and that
Who knows say na women be the master of sex enjoyment

And do you make any arrest of the said incident??

every Nigerian gals story.."i was raped"...una motto no dey cast... ndi ala

I know indirectly you are prasing the fvckee who fvck you now that you are expert in fvcking

Eriokanmi:
As a boy, I was abused by a grown up lady. I wonder why male's rape cases hardly make headlines. This is pure injustice and bias against our gender.

We fall in the same category...

1. I don't trust this woman
2. Most self acclaimed rape victims ain't completely sincere
3. Why is nobody taking action against male rape victims?

Esther40:

There's nothing enjoyable in it, it's just wickedness

na the pains and cry of their victims dey sweet them