“I was the youngest child in a family of three and the only son; my two sisters were one year apart but a decade older than me. When they were young, my father punished them by taking a belt to them. By the time I came around, he had changed his ways. I was almost always treated with kid gloves; he would go out of his way to ensure that he and I never had the permanent falling out that he had with his own father. I also had more opportunities than my sisters, as my parents became more financially stable, and my sisters moved away from home. “My eldest sister was always envious, and as the years went by, she sabotaged me by saying things about me that weren’t true. My parents were too conscientious, or passive, to take sides and wanted me to make amends with her, even though I was the one being gaslit. After my mother died, I saw in her journal an entry in which she expressed puzzlement over why my sister treated me so badly (something she never admitted to me while she was alive). “The final act came to my attention several years ago. There was some expense related to my father that my sister didn’t want to pay and wanted him to pay. I happened to be at his house when the item arrived, and I signed for it. Shortly afterward, my sister emailed me to ask if I had the bill of lading. I dutifully scanned it and sent it back to her without any text in the body of the email. A few days later, he died. In those final days, he seemed distant, as if he were nursing a hurt. “After his death, I went through his email to cancel subscriptions and services in his name and came across an email that my sister sent to him and my other sister but not to me. It was a forged version of the email that I sent to her with the bill of lading, in which she wrote, pretending to be me, ‘Can you get Dad to pay this?’ She replied, as if she were the hero, ‘I already paid it.’ “This was like a knife through my heart. I would never have quibbled over a bill nor have written about him in that manner. In my mind, he died thinking that I had, in this small way, turned my back on him. I also was appalled to think that my sister so treacherously connived to put a final wedge between us. “I’ve thought about this nearly every day for years, but I have never confronted my sister about it — have never even let on that I found the forged email. After it happened, I told my other sister what happened and how much it hurt me. Her reply was: ‘So what? You’re still going to get your share of the inheritance.’ Which wasn’t my point at all. “I’ve vacillated between keeping this to myself in order to reveal what I know at some opportune moment or letting her off the hook altogether and continuing to carry this burden. (I should mention that we live far apart and speak once a year, if that.) Is it better to tell her that I know what she did or to take this to my grave?”

Don't die with the burden just confronte her bro

Boom digit!!!

Coming from an Elder sister its so hurting, as Elder sisters are supposed to be the extension of our Mums love to us same as a Father through a son.

— have never even let on that I found the forged email. After it happened, I told my other sister what happened and how much it hurt me. Her reply was: ‘So what? You’re still going to get your share of the inheritance.’ Which wasn’t my point at all

Your two Sister's really don't understand the true concept of Family (having each others back), I would have to advice you to free the matter and face your life because for lacking this concept they will see you as overreacting hence another Issue might surface.

On the other hand for healing to take place you need to find a way to let your other sister know that you know what she did and how you felt and still feel about it, because at the end there is need for you guys to remain as family, las las family is all you've got.

If you're Nigerian and you grew here.... You'd tell her this, either to her face or on a phone call...


You sounded like a simp for a last born that's always stubborn and reckless....

I don't understand the email part.

Either confront her or move on, some things shouldn't be a burden at all.

Open up

Deleted

Bring it up in a way that she understands she needs explain whatever it is she was getting at from the email.

Also, let it go before you bring it up to her so that you don't get more hurt from whatever her reaction is.

Give her strange attitude and let her feel it that you are unhappy with her for some reasons, turture her seriously with this attitude and she would be forced to ask you 'na wetin I do you' then you can drop the bomb.

Let them know. It'll lighting your burden and don't let anyone tell you you're over reacting because you are not, as long as you can communicate it to them in a peaceful manner.

It's always better to let people know where they hurt us so we can heal faster... she may apologise, she might have an explanation that might make you forgive her foolishness but then again keep in mind that she may try to defend her actions which may hurt you more. Either way, it's always better to let people know.

mysticwarrior:
Give her strange attitude and let her feel it that you are unhappy with her for some reasons, turture her seriously with this attitude and she would be forced to ask you 'na wetin I do you' then you can drop the bomb.

mtchwww everything na turture for una.

It's been too long to still be putting up that childish attitude, approach people like an adult.

I won't be nice when asking her

Sometimes taking things lightly with people make them feel like you are weak and they do and undo with you

Ask her why she hates you so much

Is it about the inheritance?

Bro, your eldest sister is jealous because of how you were treated in the past, with time it got the better part of her.

Call her, tell her of the bad she did to you, also tell her that your parents are on more so, there's no need for her to continue beefing you.

Kanixt:
“I was the youngest child in a family of three and the only son; my two sisters were one year apart but a decade older than me. When they were young, my father punished them by taking a belt to them. By the time I came around, he had changed his ways. I was almost always treated with kid gloves; he would go out of his way to ensure that he and I never had the permanent falling out that he had with his own father. I also had more opportunities than my sisters, as my parents became more financially stable, and my sisters moved away from home. “My eldest sister was always envious, and as the years went by, she sabotaged me by saying things about me that weren’t true. My parents were too conscientious, or passive, to take sides and wanted me to make amends with her, even though I was the one being gaslit. After my mother died, I saw in her journal an entry in which she expressed puzzlement over why my sister treated me so badly (something she never admitted to me while she was alive). “The final act came to my attention several years ago. There was some expense related to my father that my sister didn’t want to pay and wanted him to pay. I happened to be at his house when the item arrived, and I signed for it. Shortly afterward, my sister emailed me to ask if I had the bill of lading. I dutifully scanned it and sent it back to her without any text in the body of the email. A few days later, he died. In those final days, he seemed distant, as if he were nursing a hurt. “After his death, I went through his email to cancel subscriptions and services in his name and came across an email that my sister sent to him and my other sister but not to me. It was a forged version of the email that I sent to her with the bill of lading, in which she wrote, pretending to be me, ‘Can you get Dad to pay this?’ She replied, as if she were the hero, ‘I already paid it.’ “This was like a knife through my heart. I would never have quibbled over a bill nor have written about him in that manner. In my mind, he died thinking that I had, in this small way, turned my back on him. I also was appalled to think that my sister so treacherously connived to put a final wedge between us. “I’ve thought about this nearly every day for years, but I have never confronted my sister about it — have never even let on that I found the forged email. After it happened, I told my other sister what happened and how much it hurt me. Her reply was: ‘So what? You’re still going to get your share of the inheritance.’ Which wasn’t my point at all. “I’ve vacillated between keeping this to myself in order to reveal what I know at some opportune moment or letting her off the hook altogether and continuing to carry this burden. (I should mention that we live far apart and speak once a year, if that.) Is it better to tell her that I know what she did or to take this to my grave?”

Confronting her won't change anything. She has chosen to be on the side of 'hatred' and only God can change such people.

Let it go. Bringing it up to her might give her more room to hurt you. If you are lucky she might change, confess and apologize to you in the future

Let her know. She might have some explanation concerning that email. I have seen where people nursed grudges for a long while only for them to find out at last that there were no bases for the grouse.

Parents who show bias towards their children while raising them always create some unnecessary enmity among those children eventually.

OP pls no vex. She must have been trying to be cunny ni. Since it still bothers you, you could bring it up the next time you guys speak( it will surely be greeted with lack of remorse and resistance) or simply make your peace with your conscience(being your truth, it will set you free and a lot easier). I would choose option B to avoid further destroying the already fragile relationship with my sibling.

This is your parent's fault....the little things .....

Na wa oh, parents should do better, even if you like a child more, you shouldn't make it very obvious, it's totally unnecessary.

You should tell her and move on from it, life is too short to be carrying needless burdens up and down.

it seem both your sistas are like that... wouldnt surprise me that the elder one already knows about it (thanks to the other sista you told).

Bring it up —not for her to apologize or show remorse — but to free yourself of the burden of having to live with the hurt in your head ad infinitum.

Forward that email to her from your father's device and cc yourself.
Should do.

I'm sure alot of people don't understand what the op wrote up there.
How can u spoil a son before his father on his death bed? Well, na God go help your sisters
Funny how I'm facing something almost similar. I don't know how a sister can be jealous of a brother because in her delusional mind, the father cares for him more
At the end, we will all be fine