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My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene - Family (8) - Nairaland

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Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by belcom10(m): 11:56am On Jul 14, 2023
Talk to her to stop. Are you afraid of her?
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by yemmywesey(m): 12:04pm On Jul 14, 2023
Let your niece breefth, dont suffocate her.

She will outgrow it when she start having relationship, school activities and sex.

What you should be worried about,
Find out the section she is always watching on porn site to know her sexual orientation.

If she spend much time watching lesbian sex, you can reorientate her back to heterosexual.
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by Akinowon123(m): 12:28pm On Jul 14, 2023
Brother, if you really want to help her.
I have a solution I can profer that will make her phone not accessible to porn again. She will be able to browse other websites except porn website and anything related to nudity. She won't know the reason why and won't be able to ask anyone . That way, weather she uses the router or her private data, she won't still be able to watch porn again unless she changed her phone
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by TripleA9: 4:06pm On Jul 14, 2023
Wawelexy:
Allow your poor niece breef.... If you stop her from watching it, then she will get in the real act... Nothing can make her stop it now, if you block her from the router, she would purchase data with her money, if you expose her and start monitoring her, she will wait till midnight when everyone is asleep, or better still go into the bathroom to do her thing...

Since you have blocked her from the router, don't kill her self esteem by letting her know you are aware of her secret, allow her use her data, Xvideo and XNXX will reset her brain when she keeps using her food/transport money for subscription every two days.. when the time comes, she will forget about it...

One thing I discovered about porn addiction is joblessness, boredom and being alone, once you get yourself busy, it stops or drastically reduces.

90% of people viewing this thread have once been addicted, or still addicted to porn. Infact this thread will trigger some people to watch it tonight cheesy.. like the false prophet use to say; This I have seen grin
Bros, you no lie for this thing wey you talk so😉😁

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Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by DrDunamis(m): 8:31pm On Jul 14, 2023
questioner:
My mum has people staying with her - my niece, an extended family member and a close family friend and her daughter.
We are okay with it cos it ensures she always has company and reduces the need to always travel to check on her.


Recently the monthly subscription I do on the router at home, which usually has carry over data by the time it expires, now lasts about a week before they start calling me to renew
Everybody in the house denied being the cause of the data drain.


Last week, I came to spend some days at my mum's and first thing I did was to install a network tracker to monitor.
Long story short, I discovered the excessive consumption was from my niece but that's not the major issue.
She was visiting porn sites which was draining data but that's still not the major prob.
My problem was the frequency and how long she spent on porn daily.


The day I came, after she retreated to her room, the porn streaming started and didn't stop until the family member sharing a room with her came back at night.
The next morning once the other lady left for work, she continued with the porn until it was time to leve for her lessons.
Once she came back in the afternoon, she did some chores, ate, sat around the sitting room for a while and went inside
and boom the porn resumed until the other girl came around hours later. This was practically the routine for the 4 days I stayed there.


The day I was to leave I told my mum that I observed the drain came from my niece and blocked her from the router.
She called my niece and questioned her but she denied knowing anything about it, I spared her blushes by saying sometimes apps have background processes that consume data without the owner knowing.


Ever since, I have been wondering if I handled the situation properly.
I didn't confront her about it cos I was concerned about the embarrassment she will feel for a male family to find out about her secret.
She might even assume I have told my mum or my elder bro (her dad), which might weigh her down emotionally.


Also, I am concerned if this is a sign of promiscuity, she will be 17 next month And aside the fact that she's quite tall, she might as well pass for a 14 year old. She's barely endowed for her age- bottomline, not the kind of girl, you will associate with waywardness.

My question is
1. Would it have been better if I had confronted her
2. Is this a possible sign of promiscuity ? - if so, I will suggest mum sends her back to her Dad cos I am not sure at her advanced age
she should be dealing with issues like this, to avoid stories that touch later on

Hmmm...
Your concerns are great...
But based on the narration you gave it could be worse, what if she's videoing and uploading her own videos?
Talk to her about it...
Counsel her...
And pray for her...
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by nairamaniac: 4:20am On Jul 15, 2023
Samantha124:
I was just a curious teenager and once I was satisfied with what I saw in those sites, I completely stopped checking them.

[b]I was just going through a phase and it soon passed... [/b]A lot of teenagers at that age are curious about sex and it's a normal thing.

So the op should just let his niece satisfy her curiosity and the whole will soon pass.

I can't remember the sections I used to visit because it's been a while.

You are sooo wrong here. For the fact that the phased just came and passed without damaging effects on you doesn't mean it would be the same for everyone else.

Perhaps if a guy or guys had enguaged you during the phase, it may have been a totally different story today.

Curiosity begets actions/practicals most times.
I personally feel OP should rehabilitate her in one way or another, albeit nicely without disgrace.
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by Nobody: 12:24pm On Jul 15, 2023
You can't prevent a teenager from having access to pornography in this era and no one can rehabilitate her until she decides that she wants to be rehabilitated.

And porn is everywhere nowadays, it's in music videos, movies, and telenovelas.

Especially your Nigerian Afrobeats, they praise sex too much... Even if the op tries to rehabilitate her, she may pretend that she's listening, only for her to go and watch it with her own data.

At the end of the day, only she can help herself by deciding when to stop.
nairamaniac:


You are sooo wrong here. For the fact that the phased just came and passed without damaging effects on you doesn't mean it would be the same for everyone else.

Perhaps if a guy or guys had enguaged you during the phase, it may have been a totally different story today.

Curiosity begets actions/practicals most times.
I personally feel OP should rehabilitate her in one way or another, albeit nicely without disgrace.

Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by nairamaniac: 8:44pm On Jul 15, 2023
Samantha124:
You can't prevent a teenager from having access to pornography in this era and no one can rehabilitate her until she decides that she wants to be rehabilitated.

And porn is everywhere nowadays, it's in music videos, movies, and telenovelas.

Especially your Nigerian Afrobeats, they praise sex too much... Even if the op tries to rehabilitate her, she may pretend that she's listening, only for her to go and watch it with her own data.

At the end of the day, only she can help herself by deciding when to stop.

Never say never or can't.
As long as she's still a teenager, the mind can be channeled into other tasks and aspects of Life.
Besides it's better to try than fold hands and give up before the race even starts.

What you see movies and music videos isn't as raw as porn from websites.
No comparisons.
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by Nobody: 9:03pm On Jul 15, 2023
A lot of her agemates mostly discuss about it because they're at a stage whereby they'll soon be transitioning to adulthood and they're curious to know more about sex.

And those movies and music videos would only make the teenager more curious about sex, hence she'll still go to those porn sites.

Only she can stop herself from doing it.
nairamaniac:


Never say never or can't.
As long as she's still a teenager, the mind can be channeled into other tasks and aspects of Life.
Besides it's better to try than fold hands and give up before the race even starts.

What you see movies and music videos isn't as raw as porn from websites.
No comparisons.
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by Kryzboy(m): 9:07pm On Jul 15, 2023
How did you install the network tracker and what's the name
questioner:
My mum has people staying with her - my niece, an extended family member and a close family friend and her daughter.
We are okay with it cos it ensures she always has company and reduces the need to always travel to check on her.


Recently the monthly subscription I do on the router at home, which usually has carry over data by the time it expires, now lasts about a week before they start calling me to renew
Everybody in the house denied being the cause of the data drain.


Last week, I came to spend some days at my mum's and first thing I did was to install a network tracker to monitor.
Long story short, I discovered the excessive consumption was from my niece but that's not the major issue.
She was visiting porn sites which was draining data but that's still not the major prob.
My problem was the frequency and how long she spent on porn daily.


The day I came, after she retreated to her room, the porn streaming started and didn't stop until the family member sharing a room with her came back at night.
The next morning once the other lady left for work, she continued with the porn until it was time to leve for her lessons.
Once she came back in the afternoon, she did some chores, ate, sat around the sitting room for a while and went inside
and boom the porn resumed until the other girl came around hours later. This was practically the routine for the 4 days I stayed there.


The day I was to leave I told my mum that I observed the drain came from my niece and blocked her from the router.
She called my niece and questioned her but she denied knowing anything about it, I spared her blushes by saying sometimes apps have background processes that consume data without the owner knowing.


Ever since, I have been wondering if I handled the situation properly.
I didn't confront her about it cos I was concerned about the embarrassment she will feel for a male family to find out about her secret.
She might even assume I have told my mum or my elder bro (her dad), which might weigh her down emotionally.


Also, I am concerned if this is a sign of promiscuity, she will be 17 next month And aside the fact that she's quite tall, she might as well pass for a 14 year old. She's barely endowed for her age- bottomline, not the kind of girl, you will associate with waywardness.

My question is
1. Would it have been better if I had confronted her
2. Is this a possible sign of promiscuity ? - if so, I will suggest mum sends her back to her Dad cos I am not sure at her advanced age
she should be dealing with issues like this, to avoid stories that touch later on
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by nairamaniac: 9:20pm On Jul 15, 2023
Samantha124:
A lot of her agemates mostly discuss about it because they're at a stage whereby they'll soon be transitioning to adulthood and they're curious to know more about sex.

And those movies and music videos would only make the teenager more curious about sex, hence she'll still go to those porn sites.

Only she can stop herself from doing it.

Samantha, an elderly one can help a teenager transform into a sexually active adult without pornography being in the entire transition.
See, partaking in sex without porn or masturbation is very very possible and more healthy to the mind and valuable use of time.

No one says she shouldnt be curious about sex.
But you can be curious and satisfy your curiousity by talking about it with more matured minds/elderly figures.
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by nairamaniac: 9:21pm On Jul 15, 2023
Kryzboy:
How did you install the network tracker and what's the name

Exactly, good question.

Op,
questioner,

How did u install it and what's the name?
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by Nobody: 9:26pm On Jul 15, 2023
Let's say she talks about it with matured minds, will those matured minds tell her about things like doggy, missionary, 69, or cow girl? grin grin cheesy

I mean those are the things that her agemates will be talking about.. We've been teenagers before and we know cheesy cheesy cheesy
nairamaniac:


Samantha, an elderly one can help a teenager transform into a sexually active adult without pornography being in the entire transition.
See, partaking in sex without porn or masturbation is very very possible and more healthy to the mind and valuable use of time.

No one says she shouldnt be curious about sex.
But you can be curious and satisfy your curiousity by talking about it with more matured minds/elderly figures.
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by nairamaniac: 10:55pm On Jul 15, 2023
Samantha124:
Let's say she talks about it with matured minds, will those matured minds tell her about things like doggy, missionary, 69, or cow girl? grin grin cheesy

I mean those are the things that her agemates will be talking about.. We've been teenagers before and we know cheesy cheesy cheesy
angry angry angry

See samantha, there is one word that matters alot from AN ADULT to A TEEN/CHILD;
The WORD is TRUST.

When a Child has complete trust for the adult, the child would trust that process of maturing.
One good reason teengers sway more towards their peer group than adults that mean well is due to Lack of trust in the adult and whatever the adult actually wants them to later become.
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by CCIA: 4:44am On Jul 16, 2023
Samantha124:
Let's say she talks about it with matured minds, will those matured minds tell her about things like doggy, missionary, 69, or cow girl? grin grin cheesy

I mean those are the things that her agemates will be talking about.. We've been teenagers before and we know cheesy cheesy cheesy
Shalommy come here and tell us about Lizard style grin
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by Shalommy(f): 9:35am On Jul 16, 2023
CCIA:

Shalommy come here and tell us about Lizard style grin
Chaii.. That samantha have spoil and corrupt. Amos goaty, where is your fu..ckman(fman)? Is he dead?undecided

1 Like

Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by CCIA: 11:40am On Jul 16, 2023
Shalommy:
Chaii.. That samantha have spoil and corrupt. Amos goaty, where is your fu..ckman(fman)? Is he dead?undecided
Fman was arrested for raping a 15 year old girl in makurdi.

Didn't you hear the news?




By the way. Hope say that your breast never first you settle down! cool
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by Nobody: 11:56am On Jul 16, 2023
A teenager can fully trust his or her elders, but still enjoys hanging out with his or her agemates because there are some things he or she can only discuss with his or her agemates.

And you still haven't answered my question, will those matured minds tell her about different kinds of sex positions? cheesy cheesy cheesy
nairamaniac:
angry angry angry

See samantha, there is one word that matters alot from AN ADULT to A TEEN/CHILD;
The WORD is TRUST.

When a Child has complete trust for the adult, the child would trust that process of maturing.
One good reason teengers sway more towards their peer group than adults that mean well is due to Lack of trust in the adult and whatever the adult actually wants them to later become.
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by Shalommy(f): 12:44pm On Jul 16, 2023
CCIA:

Fman was arrested for raping a 15 year old girl in makurdi.

Didn't you hear the news?




By the way. Hope say that your breast never first you settle down! cool
No wonder you're Hot like this. Make use of your hands. Chaii... cheesy cheesy

1 Like

Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by CCIA: 1:42pm On Jul 16, 2023
Shalommy:
No wonder you're Hot like this. Make use of your hands. Chaii... cheesy cheesy
Even if I am hor.ny, the hole in between your legs can be managed provided you wash it with disinfectant and air it for at least 24hours cool
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by nairamaniac: 2:03pm On Jul 16, 2023
Samantha124:
A teenager can fully trust his or her elders, but still enjoys hanging out with his or her agemates because there are some things he or she can only discuss with his or her agemates.

And you still haven't answered my question, will those matured minds tell her about different kinds of sex positions? cheesy cheesy cheesy
grin
No, the matured minds wdnt tell her about the sex positions. But they would let her know that her body may be developed for sex. But her mind, responsibilities and fatalities that comes along with sex are alll above her age&pay-grade.
Also, one other reason some kids stay away from certain vices is making them know the value Of being CLASSY.

I personally never smoked or drank beers whole growing up cos I saw it as something for the drivers who drove me out in my parents cars to school or outings.

My parents made me see it as something kind of local. Which worked till I was even above 20years of age.
And when I started drinking much later, I never got to points of abusing it cos I had a very low regard for drunkards and chronic smokers while growing up.

As a parent, or adult you can actually make a teenager know the value of being CLASSY/CLEAN, which could transform into being Decent.

1 Like

Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by Nobody: 2:12pm On Jul 16, 2023
I was also taught sex education from primary till high school, but that didn't prevent me from being curious to want to see the real action from those porn sites... cheesy cheesy cheesy
nairamaniac:
grin
No, the matured minds wdnt tell her about the sex positions. But they would let her know that her body may be developed for sex. But her mind, responsibilities and fatalities that comes along with sex are alll above her age&pay-grade.
Also, one other reason some kids stay away from certain vices is making them know the value Of being CLASSY.

I personally never smoked or drank beers whole growing up cos I saw it as something for the drivers who drove me out in my parents cars to school or outings.

My parents made me see it as something kind of local. Which worked till I was even above 20years of age.
And when I started drinking much later, I never got to points of abusing it cos I had a very low regard for drunkards and chronic smokers while growing up.

As a parent, or adult you can actually make a teenager know the value of being CLASSY/CLEAN, which could transform into being Decent.

Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by nairamaniac: 2:39pm On Jul 16, 2023
Samantha124:
I was also taught sex education from primary till high school, but that didn't prevent me from being curious to want to see the real action from those porn sites... cheesy cheesy cheesy

We are not saying we can stop her curioisity. But we can control the addiction to spending valuable time watching/streaming such things.
First of all the girl would need a long holidays indoors with no access to smart phones at all. That itself is a subtle rehabilitation.

She would realise that she can easily/quickly graps her school work when she's away from any possible access to porn sites.


When she sees her scores/performances in periods she's always from porn and compare to when she's addictively into it, she would mostly likely know what's good for her time/her brain.


This worked for me while growing up as a video game adddicts.


Trust me I had access to world-class game consoles and computers as a kid.
Hardly could any of my friends afford what I got.

But when my parents started giving me access to these things only during weekends and longvacs, it helped my concentration levels more.


It would be dificult at first.

But with time, you would adjust and find values in the encouragements your elderly ones(adults) are giving to you.
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by Nobody: 3:53pm On Jul 16, 2023
1. You'll be preventing the girl freedom of movement by keeping her indoors like a prisoner during long holidays, no teenager wants to be suffocating indoors during long holidays.

2. Some school work requires students to surf the internet and she'll need her phone to do her school work and pass with flying colors, you'll be depriving her her right to education if you take her phone away from her... grin grin grin

3. The op said nothing about his niece performing badly at school.
nairamaniac:


We are not saying we can stop her curioisity. But we can control the addiction to spending valuable time watching/streaming such things.
First of all the girl would need a long holidays indoors with no access to smart phones at all. That itself is a subtle rehabilitation.

She would realise that she can easily/quickly graps her school work when she's away from any possible access to porn sites.


When she sees her scores/performances in periods she's always from porn and compare to when she's addictively into it, she would mostly likely know what's good for her time/her brain.


This worked for me while growing up as a video game adddicts.


Trust me I had access to world-class game consoles and computers as a kid.
Hardly could any of my friends afford what I got.

But when my parents started giving me access to these things only during weekends and longvacs, it helped my concentration levels more.


It would be dificult at first.

But with time, you would adjust and find values in the encouragements your elderly ones(adults) are giving to you.

Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by nairamaniac: 7:13pm On Jul 16, 2023
Samantha124:
1. You'll be preventing the girl freedom of movement by keeping her indoors like a prisoner during long holidays, no teenager wants to be suffocating indoors during long holidays.
this is necessary as a subtle method to rehabilitate her.

2. Some school work requires students to surf the internet and she'll need her phone to do her school work and pass with flying colors, you'll be depriving her her right to education if you take her phone away from her... grin grin grin[/quote] you are right with this. We can't deprive her of her Fon. But then, the sites she opens can be controlled

3. The op said nothing about his niece performing badly at school.[/quote] yeah I know the op never talked about her performing badly. But most likely from the way the op says she's always back to porn sites on the internet anytime she is free or alone, it's likely to affect her studies
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by nairamaniac: 7:14pm On Jul 16, 2023
Samantha124:
1. You'll be preventing the girl freedom of movement by keeping her indoors like a prisoner during long holidays, no teenager wants to be suffocating indoors during long holidays.
this is necessary as a subtle method to rehabilitate her.

Samantha124:
2. Some school work requires students to surf the internet and she'll need her phone to do her school work and pass with flying colors, you'll be depriving her her right to education if you take her phone away from her... grin grin grin
you are right with this. We can't deprive her of her Fon. But then, the sites she opens can be controlled.

Samantha124:
3. The op said nothing about his niece performing badly at school.
yeah I know the op never talked about her performing badly. But most likely from the way the op says she's always back to porn sites on the internet anytime she is free or alone, it's likely to affect her studies
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by Nobody: 7:38pm On Jul 16, 2023
Okay Sir, you've made your point.. grin grin grin
nairamaniac:
this is necessary as a subtle method to rehabilitate her.

you are right with this. We can't deprive her of her Fon. But then, the sites she opens can be controlled.

yeah I know the op never talked about her performing badly. But most likely from the way the op says she's always back to porn sites on the internet anytime she is free or alone, it's likely to affect her studies
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by nairamaniac: 4:41am On Jul 17, 2023
Samantha124:
A teenager can fully trust his or her elders, but still enjoys hanging out with his or her agemates because there are some things he or she can only discuss with his or her agemates.

And you still haven't answered my question, will those matured minds tell her about different kinds of sex positions? cheesy cheesy cheesy
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by nairamaniac: 4:45am On Jul 17, 2023
Samantha124:
Okay Sir, you've made your point.. grin grin grin

Honestly you made some valid points. But don't give up no matter how bad things have become with someone's characters, especially a teen or yound adult.


I love your realness and boldness in expressing the extreme-realities though. Keep that all up.

1 Like

Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by cyrusmillz: 10:10am On Jul 17, 2023
questioner:

My question is
1. Would it have been better if I had confronted her
2. Is this a possible sign of promiscuity ?

I've seen lots of very wrong advices on here and please I'll advise you not to take them.
The truth is, in this mordern age that we are, porn use increase over time. Let me tell you this , it probably started out as curiosity, and then maybe a few times in a week , then daily, a couple times daily and now she watches it any given time she has.

As time being spent watching porn increases, the degree of what she consumes will also increase. She will start watching more cruel scenes(because she will get bored watching all those "normal ones" )

She will start watching threesomes, foursomes, gandbangs and really crazy things you can't begin to imagine (and beleive me , there's so much porn on the internet to satisfy whatever crazy things you can imagine), and God help you she doesn't start getting curious about lesbian porn. And over time she'll fantasize about trying out those things. That's why you need to get her help right away.

Even has she is, how are you sure she's only "just" watching and not already masturbating?

You have to understand that porn addiction is very hard to break. And at that age that she is, excessive use (just like you described) can lead to severe damages on her self esteem and even her brain.

Please try and Google yourbrainonporn, so you can understand what I'm saying.

Search " Help My teen is addicted to porn" so you can get more insights and how to deal with this situation .
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by richeeyo(m): 6:18pm On Jul 17, 2023
Padipadi:

So that she can ever olosho biz abi. She deserved family beating that ll reset her to default
She is in a stage of curiosity
Re: My 17 Year Old Niece Is Addicted To Porn - Should I Intervene by BluntCrazeMan: 4:14pm On Aug 24, 2023
questioner:
My mum has people staying with her - my niece, an extended family member and a close family friend and her daughter.
We are okay with it cos it ensures she always has company and reduces the need to always travel to check on her.


Recently the monthly subscription I do on the router at home, which usually has carry over data by the time it expires, now lasts about a week before they start calling me to renew
Everybody in the house denied being the cause of the data drain.


Last week, I came to spend some days at my mum's and first thing I did was to install a network tracker to monitor.
Long story short, I discovered the excessive consumption was from my niece but that's not the major issue.
She was visiting porn sites which was draining data but that's still not the major prob.
My problem was the frequency and how long she spent on porn daily.


The day I came, after she retreated to her room, the porn streaming started and didn't stop until the family member sharing a room with her came back at night.
The next morning once the other lady left for work, she continued with the porn until it was time to leve for her lessons.
Once she came back in the afternoon, she did some chores, ate, sat around the sitting room for a while and went inside
and boom the porn resumed until the other girl came around hours later. This was practically the routine for the 4 days I stayed there.


The day I was to leave I told my mum that I observed the drain came from my niece and blocked her from the router.
She called my niece and questioned her but she denied knowing anything about it, I spared her blushes by saying sometimes apps have background processes that consume data without the owner knowing.


Ever since, I have been wondering if I handled the situation properly.
I didn't confront her about it cos I was concerned about the embarrassment she will feel for a male family to find out about her secret.
She might even assume I have told my mum or my elder bro (her dad), which might weigh her down emotionally.


Also, I am concerned if this is a sign of promiscuity, she will be 17 next month And aside the fact that she's quite tall, she might as well pass for a 14 year old. She's barely endowed for her age- bottomline, not the kind of girl, you will associate with waywardness.

My question is
1. Would it have been better if I had confronted her
2. Is this a possible sign of promiscuity ? - if so, I will suggest mum sends her back to her Dad cos I am not sure at her advanced age
she should be dealing with issues like this, to avoid stories that touch later on

In Igbo Land,, everybody trains a child.

I don't know about any other place.

In the European Lands,, everybody is on his/her own.
Not even parents or older (or younger) siblings can say anything about anything that is happening in someone's life (that is, after the person had attained certain age)

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