addmole:


She was not a virgin before I MARRIED HER. Infact I know her ex. Though she doesn't cheat on me. She loves to be alone, make money, cruise, vibes with her friends, family. But not with me. Dont cuddle her, don't tickle, don't laugh with her. She gets angry with every little thing. Doesnt apologise. I once cheated on her but apologised. But now, she's starving me of sex, coupled with the height of disrespect from her. Last time I CALLED her elder brother about our frequent quarells. He just said he would talk to her. But he never did. Her mother shouted at me, if i wanted to divorce her, i should go ahead. So much quarells. I am tired. She even left the family prayer whatsapp group i created. OMO, I don't know what to do. I am just tired.

FREQUENT STORY of Married Men. So sad

addmole:


Bro I am not a SIMP. I just try to respect the boundaries of marriage and my family. But I am being pushed. i JUST HAVE TO CRY OUT. I have reported issues so much to my pastor, her parents - no one wants to listen to us again.

BRO, is OK to SPEAK OUT.
You will be Relived.

You did well

OvertheTop:



Oga! Dont Blame the man jor.

This your Mindset is Very Wrong....it is the Reason why Men Die of Depression. because Men Don't Discuss their Pain and Frustration

So you mean he Should Bottle up his Pain and Die silently.

Abeg REST

Continue to discuss your pain and frustrations up and down, the outcome of it will even send you to resonating depression...

addmole:



Hahaha. I am not too needy but have been patient. You didnt read my post well. 5 years for missionary style 10mins. No deep intense. Few times a week. Haba. Coupled with the disrespect everyday. Family have adviced. Church have adviced.

Oga abeg shut up for once and get a side chick, all these epistle ontop woman. I work as a club manager and I see girls troop in like water, different shapes, sizes and I can't even remember how many I have nakaka. You are prioritizing this issue too much. If you are that handsome as you claim it won't be hard to get a side chick. Ontop woman you just dey give yourself stress, giving excuse not to cheat because of your kids and family is all bullcrap especially when her own family already said you can divorce her. I wonder why everyone can't be like me. Oga go out there and get a side chick and stop being a simp. Sha make sure to always use condom.

investigate her past eg first or past boyfriends, consult powerful pastors to know if there is sometime wrong with her,

in all said and done and no solution, marry second wife.

no come kill yourself

Any woman who denies you sex is a strong ground for divorce..

I won't say you should divorce her, that is for you to decide, but
I will say marry another wife that loves you for who you are, spend your time with her more, so that you don't die before your time,
But be very careful with that wife, because women with such proud mentality can go far in their revenge actions
Let your family know what you are going through, and your decision, but be the man who has the final say here, because it is you that is actually bothered, whose life is threathened.

olaodun:
Oga u really poured out you mind , I am in the same shoes with you but your own is better
solution
1 Be patient with her and change your strategy
2 You are compounding the issue by telling her you will get a side chick pls apologize to her about that that you were just joking
3 show love to her buy her gifts often based on her likes no expensive thing according to your ability
4 Let a counselor talk to her who she trusts pastor or any others
5. Above all show maturity focus on your children , make more money invest for future and put your mind away from this challenge and only give to her according to her time if she will not complain, get various books to read and pls dont allow any distractions focus on making more money for future investment because no body will give u money

What nonsense are you saying man.. sex is the most important ingredients in marriage.

Definitely something you don't know about this woman.

Personally I feel there is no use being in such unhealthy relationship...

A difficult decision to introduce another woman into the kid's life but such recalcitrant behaviour, leaves one with no other choice than cut ties and seek a better union.

An unhealthy sexual appetite plus questionable character in one woman is certainly too much for a young man. Life na for enjoyment abeg

If I am not happy in a marriage it’s time to bounce kids or not one life to live enjoy it

You saw all these signs and still went ahead to Marry her. I'm not judging though. it's just weird to think people will change; Yes change is constant but most times a snake is a snake; it can never change into another animal

Many men are like that, just because they want to impress their inlaws and some few people....

dkidd:

How man go weak like that? Maybe na the woman family dey feed am

wany:

Cut down on phonograph and two times a week sex will be ok for you.

You mean pornograghic videos?

this is sad because it is obvious you are committed to your marriage and love your wife, but unfortunately she does not love you, it could be psychological or even a spiritual problem, or she could still be in love with someone else or maybe she prefer the own gender...you got it wrong by not reading these sign during courtship...sex is key in maintaining a healthy marriage and after all the stress of the day man need to let off some steam....go to God in prayer because he is the originator of marriage, try and take your mind off sex so you wont feel the pain...concentrate and enjoy what she can give you for now stop complaining about her either to her or to any body....just flow along, she may start loosening up but i can assure you all is not well with her, it could be spiritual so you have to pray and also try and dig into her past

talented321:
Hahahahaha.........
One woman' one man marriage... You go explain tire.... No fuckin evidence.....

Bro u don't need advice, u are just simp that don't want to repent..... How can ur mother-inlaw involve in ur marriage sex life..........

u b mum.u?

addmole:



EVERYTHING you just put up is exactly how she does. Dont hug her, she's so defensive. You cannot have a healthy discussion with her. Yes, I saw the signs, but I always told myself she should change.

this is where ur problem start! If she can't change during relationship! My man forget m, she will not change in ur house except circumstances which are rare...

addmole:


2 days ago, it was the day set for the 1 round we were supposed to make love, she just said, something is on her face. I wish I can describe it. I was like, why Is it that anytime its when we want to make out is when you must have en excuse, she just shouted at me, that I should go that i dont care. I was like, this was the same person who was jumping and telling me she wants to fix a nose ring. Very healthy and bouncing all over the place, but when it comes to my usual 1 round on the old timetable. She would look for an excuse. Her mother shouted at me that if I want to divorce her, I should go ahead that she's tired of settling our differences.

Oga I want to curse you but I don't think it will make any difference. Clearly, you have no sense of self worth. Only a fool quarrels and bickers with a woman over sex that is as cheap as a loaf of bread.

Your wife is tired of you but still you can't see this. To her, you are a worthless pile of unimportant flesh and you confirm this by haggling, nagging and bleating over sex that you can easily get elsewhere with very minimal effort.

Please have some self respect and ignore that woman for at least 3 solid years. Work on yourself, lift weight to appear masculine and attractive and then start looking out for easy lays to sharpen your instinct and format your sex starved brain.

Thereafter, find much younger and prettier whores in need, pay your dues and enmesh yourself in their youthful and very enticing bodies till you completely drain your balls and become totally indifferent to your wives naked body.

Tell yourself you have needs which must be met. Say this and mean it. Then work towards actualizing it.

But I doubt you will take any of the advice you have received here because you are too weak to even understand what is happening around you.
Maybe you are even composing a love poem right now just to try one more time to convince your wife to fuk. I hear you say to yourself, just maybe if I use this particular phrase, she'll pity me and let me fuk this night.

Let us know how that is working out

freemi:
u b mum.u?

Another useless simp spotted....

Curvinus:



Oga I want to curse you but I don't think it will make any difference. Clearly, you have no sense of self worth. Only a fool quarrels and bickers with a woman over sex that is as cheap as a loaf of bread.

Your wife is tired of you but still you can't see this. To her, you are a worthless pile of unimportant flesh and you confirm this by haggling, nagging and bleating over sex that you can easily get elsewhere with very minimal effort.

Please have some self respect and ignore that woman for at least 3 solid years. Work on yourself, lift weight to appear masculine and attractive and then start looking out for easy lays to sharpen your instinct and format your sex starved brain.

Thereafter, find much younger and prettier whores in need, pay your dues and enmesh yourself in their youthful and very enticing bodies till you completely drain your balls and become totally indifferent to your wives naked body.

Tell yourself you have needs which must be met. Say this and mean it. Then work towards actualizing it.

But I doubt you will take any of the advice you have received here because you are too weak to even understand what is happening around you.
Maybe you are even composing a love poem right now just to try one more time to convince your wife to fuk. I hear you say to yourself, just maybe if I use this particular phrase, she'll pity me and let me fuk this night.

Let us know how that is working out

I don't know y d man still de d marriage after you will hear he died from high BP . People always wonder y women last long in life than men and this is one of d reasons .

Addmole let me tell you d truth the only reason you are seeking advice is to just let it out your chest . I just de pity u cause you go still die because of all this trouble . You know what to do leave dat woman and get someone better but you go say "I don't want to leave because of the kids " baba d kids have there own life to live .

Your woman see you as nothing she doesn't love you that's y she can't have sex with you .
I bet that those 1 min sex sef she was never wet .

Na man u be man up and send the witch out before she kills you .

addmole:
I and My wife have been married for 5 years. We are based here in Lagos. She's 35 years old. We are doing very okay and living comfortably. Since we got married, my wife hated sex so much. I am not even trying to sugarcoat this. She doesn't want to hear you talk about it or she does it. There's no one in the family that haven't tried to settle our differences since we got married. She was never like this when we were dating. It's been 1 issue to the other. She doesn't initiate sex, and when she does accept you to have sex, it's missionary style and it's just 1 round. Ah, me wey dey like knack wella. This woman begin change am for me. Lol. She doesn't want to hear you discuss sex.

Anyway sha, lets move on...

5 YEARS ago, her mum came to my house to kneel down and tell me I am stressing her daughter that I should not kill her with sex. Her then-unmarried sister then asked if I ama dog? Ah, insult. Anyway, I don forgive her. I spoke to my wife and told her what is the meaning of this? What kind of lies are you feeding your family with? This is the same person who happens to make just 1 round of sex. Just 1 round. She lies flat on her back. Once you are done, she quickly pushes you away if you stay on top of her for more than 10 to 15 minutes. There were times she would hit me if I try to initiate sex. I reported to her elder brother. He elder brother warned her. She stopped. She moved to kicking me anytime we initiate sex on bed, i reported to my pastor, he spoke to her and then, she stopped. My pastor told me i have to be patient with her. I said OK.

Omo...
The only time we make love is just 1 round, missionary style and that's it. She says she has pain on her stomach. I have been patient for 5 years with her. I told her anytime she's strong enough, we can make out. That there's no problem.

I have been pressured to cheat on her many times. i HAVE BEEN REALLY PRESSURED. Its just not easy. Her family have insulted me for demanding sex from her. Lol. The thing tire me. I see no where i am demanding. We don't do any other position apart from the missionary style. We do not even kiss. This is a woman that doesn't want you to kiss in in anyway. Even sometimes, she shouts at you when you try to be romantic to kiss her unexpectedly just to spies up our love life. She doesn't even want you to cuddle her on bed. She wants to be alone. Make money, attend to her business, vibes, laugh with friends and family and that's it. When it comes to sex, don't go there discussing that with her about making out.

I even had to retort to preparing her mind for sex by sending her a position we would try on WhatsApp, she would leave the message on read and not respond. When you talk to her about what you sent to her, she would just tell you, she's not strong to make love.

ANOTHER PART OF HER:
My wife is a very bitter person full of anger. If you try to tickle her when she's cooking in the kitchen to play with her, she gets angry and warns you not to try such. My wife doesn't want you to play with her. I am not writing all these to make it look I am a victim here. But all these are my experiences. I have to pour it out. I NEED SOME ADVICE.

There were many times, we agreed on separating. But we have already children and we used to think about these because the quarrels and the disrespect, sex and everything is causing a whole lot on us.

We do not have any form of healthy discussion very well. Before you know it, we are quarrelling over the place, she's shouting. There was a time we quarrelled that after throwing a Gotv remote at her, she fainted. She woke up before we got to the hospital. She almost died. I told her, she needs to stop her anger and control herself and enjoy her marriage. She just won't listen. She's an Edo woman.

I have tried many times to leave the marriage because it's affecting my mental health. Sometimes I regret about getting married to her. Sometimes, I just feel, maybe I CAN TRY MORE and give her a chance. When you call her to discuss our sex life, about her anger and bitterness, she doesn't apologise. She hardly apologise. Even when I get to explain her part on why she was wrong, she claims she's right until maybe someone hears us arguing before she would reluctantly apologise.

I have been battling a really starved sex life, full of a woman with bitterness, anger and pride who never apologise. She's quick to advice other women on Facebook, She would video call friends, give them advice and her family how they need to maintain peace with their relationship. But she never seem to give me respect in anyway in her own own. Hmmmm.

Recently, my wife brought out another timetable that she cannot cope making out with me the way she does. Which is 3 times a week. That she can only be available to make love 2 times a week. This 2 times is just 1 round each. This is how she wants it. I immediately responded to her that I feel her pain. I understand. She cannot be pressured just to make it look like she wants to please me that I would rather get a side chic. Yes, i know this was wrong to tell her, but i am frustrated. She disrespects me and starve me of sex and she's even bending the rules again. She responded that 'ok that I am free to do what i LIKE'.

i decided to bring this here to know the comments from people. I would like to get advice from persons who are going through similar things like this and advice me on what to do.

Some of you might say, call her and talk to her. I have done that several times since in the last 5years. I did it last night and twice today. I have spoken to her. She promised she would change, she would not only repeat the same thing but make things worst the next time.

She disrespects me a lot. I have sometimes left the house but come back after families get to call me. She would change for a week and return to her old self.

What do I DO? Please make your responses constructive enough.

God knows that one thing a woman can never starve me with is sex. If she will not open her legs, those that will open theirs are outside beckoning.

I feel your pains brother because my girlfriend if we go like 2 to 3 rounds and I I still Advance for more she will say I should wait till morning I know how I normally feel ..

I will not advice you to on separation but my only candy advise for you is feel free to cheat on her ..if there's money my brother you have nothing to worry of sex ,sex should be the least thing that comes your mind..
Perform your duty as a man in the house when it comes for sex stay off from her don't discuss anything about sex with her best is to cheat as you want outside..

Your mother in-law getting involved in your sex life is not nice at all .. some one like me o will sex starved her by declaring marathon cheating till she even asked herself if she is living with her brother or with a follow woman like her ..

A woman that does not allow her man bang and mutilate her body like cadaver does not love him passionately and a couple with a diminishing sex life will soon turn their marriage to brother and sister relationship. Me,I can't leave a woman because of sex ohh when I can get enough sex else where. I advice,you change tactics when it comes to sex,spice up things. Maybe,madam is still waiting for someone to sweep her off her feet and make mad, passionate love to her.😁

Offpointng:
Reason why I tell young men like myself, Dont allow Love becloud your senses of reasoning. Trust me the sign were always right there, you were just blind to it

I used to have what you'd call an Ex then, Same way OP describe his wife was exactly who she is. Twinkling annoys her and she immediately changes it for you, hugs from the back esp when she's in the kitchen immediately changes her mood and get her so angry, Simple romance like hugging (common hugging) she'd push you away, You can't have a healthy and Intelligent talk with her, Always defensive and hardly apologises, Any Play other than the use of mouth to call each other Big head is a No No for her, Loves sleeping like some descendants of Koala, So boring and everything bored you can think of. Firstly, I thought all these happened cuz she's still a Virgin at that age, but I've got Virgin friends that we play and have lotta fun without having sex and are not so boring like she is. Later Got to find out that's just who she was, not cuz she's a virgin or something

So that faithful night we were all loved up on chat and we chatted till she wanted to sleep and told me we'd chat the next day, so we said the lovers Good night and went to bed. But before I got to sleep, I told myself I'm so done with this girl. Normally, she always expects I do the Good morning text first or the Good morning call all the time. But this time, woke up and din call her or text her Good morning, I went bout my normal day activities like she never existed. All those time till in the evening she never call or texted until I uploaded a picture of Myself and my guys chilling bfr we replied the status and of cuz some Rude Bullshit text, I read and din reply.

She called me that night bout twice and I din pick nor returned the call, of course she took to WhatsApp again forming boss lady, I made sure i read and din reply and went to sleep putting my phone on flight mode incase she wanna disturb my sleep with calls.

Oooboy I dabaru that girl head cuz we had no fight the night bfr, we chatted so cool and was even talking bout marriage plans next day she kept calling and calling, pick for where. took her sis phone to call me unknown to me I picked, my people come see cool broken voice that I've not heard in months. I immediately cut and blocked. Any she took to crying on VN telling me if she's done anything forgive me bla bla, But nigga man's mind was made up. She got into depression and every effort her, her friends, her family made to reach out to me, I blocked em all. I moved on. Well after so many months I'm glad to let y'all know she's still single cuz I doubt any guy can be patient with her like I was

So Op the signs were always there, you just turned blind eyes to em.

you are right any girl that drains you emotionally in a relationship does not really love you. Just ditch her and move on.

Lanmonfishery:
Na reverse psychology u go use for am....she go bow

true give that woman to me and she will be the one begging for it.

izonborn098:
Another useless simp spotted....

u dnt even knw d meaning of simp. U r a child

Okay mumu old man.... U can decide to be a simp it is choice...org

freemi:
u dnt even knw d meaning of simp. U r a child

PrimadonnaO:



Nothing good comes out of evil.

Breaking covenant.

You can psyche yourself all you want, but the truth is the truth.

A home isn't repaired by cheating.

You are totally Offpoint.... There's no home to repair... And when it comes to convenant, the woman broke her convenant long time ago and keeps breaking it after promising she will change at every reconciliation then go back to her default settings a week after.... And she clearly gave the go ahead for the guy to sort himself outside. So what are you on to...

The mother want her daughter back home. The elder sister want her sister back home. The church pastor is tired of settling same issue... The whole family including the wife doesn't give a fvck about the man.... From what I see here, the man is the one holding that lady hostage... Both of them are not compatible, he's just forcing vibes....

Poisonousman:


You are talking rubbish... Absolute rubbish.. you no get sense... Na this rubbish dey make her Mumu... Common sense no dey your head..

One thing u need to learn in public conversation is to never condemn an utterance because it doesn't aline with urs.

The aggression that made u insult me for airing my opinion is embedded in almost every Nigerian and it's not our fault but we should not allow our current situation define us.

I bet u that u can hardly find this type of our aggression in people who are truly happy with life.

addmole:


I love these bold words. Thank you. SO DIRECT. You hit the nail. This is exactly what they feel. The mother tells me to my face, that if I want to serve her daughter divorce papers, I should bring it. My wife also says she's ready. They don't care . I cannot even pick phone to report my wife to them again. Even with her sisters. I cant try it. The elder sister doesn't listen to me when I try to talk about issues of my wife. I have stopped visiting them since 3 years. Omo, a lot of things to say, be like I go delete this thread.

I won't be surprised ur not the real father of those kids. Run a DNA test on all ur kids . Ur like a blind man in this whole setting. There's something they're keeping away from u and they're probably done with u rn

She is wicked. So she married you to accomplish a status in the society. I m sorry she doesn't love you. Infact this new development means you have lost your manhood.

I have similar experience, my wife was all over me when we started dating, we play together and do have sex anytime we want until she got pregnant although there were some red flags during those times but I never see them as a threat, i thought she would change as we grow together not knowing dat I was wrong, I love my wife that I never considered cheating because I want her to trust me, but I was wrong, the more you love a bad wife the more she disrespect you, she will start to look down on you especially if she don't see you with any woman, she will be thinking that you are not attractive that is the reason women don't disturb you, when you demand for sex she will denial you because she believes no better woman can give you, this is true about a woman dat don't really love you from the start and a woman who was once a runs girl, they get tired of their husband because they are used to many men.
the best solution is to
1. avoid her sex, look for a side chick that will be available anytime you want sex
2. get a second wife
3. try to flirt with hot babes online
4. never argue with her and don't play with her, just marry your phone
5. disrespect her mom a little, don't be too loyal

then na she go dey find you