I never wanted to do this and this is a very embarrassing situation but I need help from nairaland users.

I have an older brother in his early 40s. Since I was a child till this very moment, this person has been a torn on the flesh of my parents and the family in general.

Sometime in 2020, with the help of my elder sister's husband ( the HR) we were able to find a job for him as a supervisor in a factory and then I and my immediate elder brother (another sibling of mine) contributed money and rented an apartment for him in Lagos and then bought some property to furnish the apartment. To our surprise, my elder brother starting forcing his sexual advances on junior female workers and if any of these girls reject his advances he would start threatening the girls that he would get them fired with the help of the HR (My sister's husband). Forunately my sister's husband found out what was going on and rejected my brother's request for the female workers to be sacked. This started a war between my elder brother and my sister and her husband.

My elder brother eventually left that company (note he wasn't fired he LEFT by himself) and went back to the village. When my father heard this he almost collapsed as he knew the trouble that was coming his way.

Since he returned to the village he started assaulting my parents and I had to send money (about 400,000) back to Nigeria for him to rent a flat just so he could leave my parents alone. My brother stayed in that apartment for 3 months then started fighting his landlord and then told his landlord he couldn't stay for the year and demanded some part of his rent back,he took his rent, returned to the village and picked up from where he left by fighting my father ( a very old man). Its so bad that my father sometimes leaves the house (The house that he built as a family house) and stays outside for hours before returning home.

Please do we have restraining order laws in Nigeria and is there a particular police division in the Nigerian police or legal system that can be used to address an issue such as this?

I'm tired and I'm considering taking a drastic and extremely aggressive decision to resolve this situation once and for all.

With my loud...
I once has a friend who when he wanted to die fight almost everyday..
Village people dey use ur brother head dance azonto in their temple...
Drastic measure' then involve the police na, and from my observation if u treat that guy carelessly and looseguard, somebody will go down in that family because he is desperate to die and will go down with anybody..

I think he needs deliverance

Take him to Mountain of fire. Or connect to Pastor Jerry Eze every morning on NSPPD.

What God cannot do doesn't exist

You'll surely come back with a testimony

Goodluck

Kai this is serious. He needs serious prayer and deliverance. I know and use to hear of families where the first born, most likely males turn out to be useless and liability to the family. But, op this your own is useless and a pain in the family. I just pity your old popsy hope he won't get high bp like this.

Please take restraining action. A troublesome adult is worst than a troublesome kid.

Helinues is the supposed brother

I know some people will advise he take him to prayer ground for deliverance or whataview. At times drastic actions are needed to put such a person in check.

I'd advise you engage with someone in the village where he lives with your parents. Let the community call him and have a talk with him. They should give him a stern warning to stop fighting his parents nor anyone around. They should let him know failure to adhere to the warning will lead to something else he will forever regret. Do that without letting him know you're behind the scene. The community leaders and traditional leaders if possible will be involve. Trust me that will calm him down.

If paradventure he continues after the serious warning giving to him, you can get him arrested and locked up. They shouldn't beat him though but lock him up for days. He shouldn't be allowed to mingle with others in the cell. He should be starved for days but they shouldn't touch him yet. He will obviously beg for mercy. Then he will be subjected to write down statement never to see him around his father's house, and if he must go there he had to live in peace and harmony with them. They maybe coming to your father's house once in a while to check up on him and ask your father if he has turned a new leave.

If he continues fighting your father then he should be restricted from getting close to your father's house and possibly the community at large.

You do not have to call cops or the uniform men to beat him up. Some wouldn't see all the attributes he had committed. They'd go about gossiping that his younger sibling uses his power on him because he was privileged.

Super story

Hmm....seems he is the first son and was handled with kids glove during his formative years. I believe by now, your parents have reported him to your kinsmen and your traditional ruler.

I know folks who have bundled their younger brothers who are just like your elder brother and got them forcefully admitted into govt run psychiatric hospitals (which though is not right) and settled the hospital management with good amount of money to have their younger brothers kept there at least for 4 months.

Drastic and extremely aggressive action? You want to kpai your brother @ Tetrisbiz? Calm down. You need to ask more questions from your parents.

Your brother might actually have mental issues, you said he has been like this all his life, have you people ever thought about taking him to a psychologist. Like you have noted his behavior is not normal.

This is a serious matter. Send me a DM and he would be fine.

This I have seen.

Hmmm

Na way ooo

Tetrisbiz:
I never wanted to do this and this is a very embarrassing situation but I need help from nairaland users.

I have an older brother in his early 40s. Since I was a child till this very moment, this person has been a torn on the flesh of my parents and the family in general.

Sometime in 2020, with the help of my elder sister's husband ( the HR) we were able to find a job for him as a supervisor in a factory and then I and my immediate elder brother (another sibling of mine) contributed money and rented an apartment for him in Lagos and then bought some property to furnish the apartment. To our surprise, my elder brother starting forcing his sexual advances on junior female workers and if any of these girls reject his advances he would start threatening the girls that he would get them fired with the help of the HR (My sister's husband). Forunately my sister's husband found out what was going on and rejected my brother's request for the female workers to be sacked. This started a war between my elder brother and my sister and her husband.

My elder brother eventually left that company (note he wasn't fired he LEFT by himself) and went back to the village. When my father heard this he almost collapsed as he knew the trouble that was coming his way.

Since he returned to the village he started assaulting my parents and I had to send money (about 400,000) back to Nigeria for him to rent a flat just so he could leave my parents alone. My brother stayed in that apartment for 3 months then started fighting his landlord and then told his landlord he couldn't stay for the year and demanded some part of his rent back,he took his rent, returned to the village and picked up from where he left by fighting my father ( a very old man). Its so bad that my father sometimes leaves the house (The house that he built as a family house) and stays outside for hours before returning home.

Please do we have restraining order laws in Nigeria and is there a particular police division in the Nigerian police or legal system that can be used to address an issue such as this?

I'm tired and I'm considering taking a drastic and extremely aggressive decision to resolve this situation once and for all.

why can't u lock him up eh, you have enough reason to...forget blood is thicker than water issue o,the world has changed..gone are the days it's advisable to die for siblings or tolerate rubbish cos he is your sibling.

I hate to be abusive but those people talking of deliverance are brainless

Does your brother use drugs or alcohol?

Truth be told. The same parent spoiled him from a young age. What you are experiencing is now new and very common with first born males as their mother usually spoils them from a young age giving them that entitlement mentality.

What is happening to him is not ordinary, he needs serious spiritual work, depends on the side you want it

That's so annoying, i dont really know how to approach that stubbornness.

Your parents deserve peace.

I know its expensive, it would have been better, if your parents stay in a place, he does not know about.

Your report to your traditional ruler the will warn him the traditional ruler will tell him any more complain from his parents will warrant banishment or small beating from the youth you don't even need to work yourself up

Reading...

One thing not mentioned is if he uses drugs or Hard drugs to be specific.

If no,

Have you guys checked for his mental health status? You know, help may be what he needs.

valgbo:
Your brother might actually have mental issues, you said he has been like this all his life, have you people ever thought about taking him to a psychologist. Like you have noted his behavior is not normal.

His behaviour is "normal" for most eldest sons who messed up in life while they see their younger ones doing well in life.

Bronxie:
Helinus is the supposed brother

You mean Helinues?

This one na older brother from hell!

Na soldiers fit reset your brother brain.
Arrange for him to be a guest in an army barrack for 3 days. He will change for good.

Are you sure he’s not a bastard? That’s glow they act. Otherwise tell your father to disown him. He has nothing to lose or gain

If I were your father I would buy a gun and shoot the bastard dead and damn the consequences!

Tetrisbiz:
I never wanted to do this and this is a very embarrassing situation but I need help from nairaland users.

I have an older brother in his early 40s. Since I was a child till this very moment, this person has been a torn on the flesh of my parents and the family in general.

Sometime in 2020, with the help of my elder sister's husband ( the HR) we were able to find a job for him as a supervisor in a factory and then I and my immediate elder brother (another sibling of mine) contributed money and rented an apartment for him in Lagos and then bought some property to furnish the apartment. To our surprise, my elder brother starting forcing his sexual advances on junior female workers and if any of these girls reject his advances he would start threatening the girls that he would get them fired with the help of the HR (My sister's husband). Forunately my sister's husband found out what was going on and rejected my brother's request for the female workers to be sacked. This started a war between my elder brother and my sister and her husband.

My elder brother eventually left that company (note he wasn't fired he LEFT by himself) and went back to the village. When my father heard this he almost collapsed as he knew the trouble that was coming his way.

Since he returned to the village he started assaulting my parents and I had to send money (about 400,000) back to Nigeria for him to rent a flat just so he could leave my parents alone. My brother stayed in that apartment for 3 months then started fighting his landlord and then told his landlord he couldn't stay for the year and demanded some part of his rent back,he took his rent, returned to the village and picked up from where he left by fighting my father ( a very old man). Its so bad that my father sometimes leaves the house (The house that he built as a family house) and stays outside for hours before returning home.

Please do we have restraining order laws in Nigeria and is there a particular police division in the Nigerian police or legal system that can be used to address an issue such as this?

I'm tired and I'm considering taking a drastic and extremely aggressive decision to resolve this situation once and for all.

...
I have a brother like that before.
Now he is doing fine.
Don't blame your brother.
Your brother is mentally and emotionally traumatised.
Police torture won't solve it..
I believe your brother is a cultist, who smoke and do drug.
Your brother is a potential great man...
Let him learn handwork or if you have money send him out of the country

I don't think so because they even give him a job and apartment, if he is responsible person he would have start from there...

Mindlog:


His behaviour is "normal" for most eldest sons who messed up in life while they see their younger ones doing well in life.