Ever since you left, it's been hell — I've been a mess, I overstress but still can't progress, and it fvcking hurts. You left me when I was just a kid and I had to shoulder responsibilities that even adults run away from! You left me in the hands of narcissist like Chris Naco who made me question my sanity and contemplated suicide multiple times.

I could have done it but thinking about Mother and my siblings, I had to reconsider and put them first.

Life is hard, it's like I'm on a marathon race with bullet wounds and no water or food. Daddy, do you know how hard it was swallowing the fact that we were literally talking about my 13th birthday that night only to be wake up in the midnight to find out that you ain't breathing?!

Daddy, do you know how these people treated me especially after you left? Daddy, imagine Madam Chris Naco asking 13 year old me "when did that your father die?" 😡. Like, losing my daddy was traumatizing enough! Dad, Chris Naco blamed me for everything wrong — I was just a little boy forced to grow up.

Daddy, do you know I had to lie about my age and act older in order to fit in and get those dirty menial jobs? Do you know that despite that you promised that you were gonna make sure I fulfill college, they manipulated Mother into persuading me into Nwaboi apprenticeship? Do you know I was accused of all manner of evil and didn't get a penny after I decided to leave?

Man, I'm gonna be 22 two days from now and I can't even celebrate it when I can't get over the fact that you died on 26 two days before my birthday! Dad, I wish you were still here but you have become so distant in my memory because it hurts everytime I picture you — daddy, I hate the way I remember you 😢.

I was looking for your picture on my phone I asked sis to send to me last year but honestly, I don't need the picture of my dad, I need the real thing! Now, I can never get to know how that father's love feels like ever again.

I've been trying to make it up to Momma but I've been away from home so long because I was used and dumped after that devilish Nwaboi apprenticeship. I'm scared because I might end up unaliving myself if anything happens to her.

Dad, your boy is getting older. Life has been unfair, I'm trying to give Mom and the fam a better life so I can leave this planet as soon as possible but she hates the fact that I don't fancy "long life". Dad, when I have kids... Dad... my mental health is a mess, it's gotten worst since you left... Dad, I have beards now... Dad, I finished high school and got good grades in waec. Dad, wish you were here... I miss you... I will never get to see you again 😭. Dad... where you at?

Daddy, help me. Daddy...

I miss you 😢.

I miss having a father I can call "daddy"... Man... I wouldn't have become a doctor and dedicate my life to eradicating diabetes but now, I never even got the chance to go to college.

Daddy, I will work my way to the top just like the patriarch of the Rothschild family and eradicate poverty. I love you, man... I wish you were here... It was hard, it is hard...

Chai I know how u feel man. May His peace be with him amen