Good day to you, good people of Nairaland.
I have an issue that I need your opinion on.
In 2021, my ex and I broke up, and I was determined then that I wouldn't get into a relationship unless I am financially stable. However, things didn't turn out as planned. I'm still struggling financially. I can't lie to you guys; it's not easy staying away from sex and relationships for a long while. It's very lonely and depressing. So, around late December last year, I decided that I'm going to enter a relationship this 2024 regardless of my financial situation. I'm also not getting any younger; I turned 27 this year. So, it's only right that I start meeting people.

Well, that's when I started noticing the problem. It was as if I was cursed by my ex or something because I don't know how to explain it. Every girl I have approached so far this year rejected me. The most painful part is that some of them gave me the green light; like outsiders even thought I was dating them, but when I actually asked them for a relationship, they declined. There's one that does all these public displays of affection, like holding hands whenever we walk together, calling me pet names, buying things for me, etc. But this particular girl told me point blank that she has no feelings for me whatsoever. I was shocked and surprised. Another girl I asked for a relationship; this one said she likes me, but it's just impossible for us to be in a relationship.
Besides, all of these, all my attempts to also just have sex have also been met with huge disappointment. I met a girl around January; this girl told me she doesn't want to have sex even though she allows me to touch her, handle, and suck her breasts; she would never allow me to penetrate. I had to ditch her because she was just adding to my sexual frustration.

The last one that actually made me realize that something is wrong is after trying to date girls around me and they all turned me down. I decided to try a long-distance relationship. I asked a girl I met on Facebook out, and to my surprise, she agreed. I was quite happy and felt a bit of relief that finally maybe I wasn't cursed after all. Her place wasn't even that far; it's all within the same state, just different local governments. Anyways, to cut the long story short, after we started the so-called relationship, we met once at a restaurant, and she admitted that she likes me and that she had a great time with me, although I don't feel the same way because she wasn't my type body-wise. However, I was willing to lower my standards, and after a few weeks of the relationship, I tried to invite her over, and that's when the excuses came in. She kept giving excuses until I couldn't take it, and I forced her to open up. She told me she's not ready for sex for now, that she's sorry she misled me because I told her repeatedly while we were dating that I don't do sexless relationships and she said she's okay with it. I was hurt because she wasted my time. However, I had to break up with her.
Please, guys, what could be wrong with me? I'm suspecting my ex because she's the person I have had sex with last and also had a meaningful relationship with. It hurts more seeing that she has dated other guys after our breakup, but I'm still struggling to find a girl. It's so lonely. All day I don't have anyone calling me or texting me. In fact, out of frustration, I deleted all social media apps except WhatsApp because they make me feel lonelier. Guys, trust me when I say I'm not ugly and I'm not short. I'm also quite intelligent as many girls I have spoken with have complimented me particularly on that. So why exactly am I finding it hard to get a girlfriend? Don't tell me it's because of my financial situation; I have seen guys not even doing better than I am in relationships. Even ugly guys too. What am I doing wrong?

OndoRaph:
You are masturbating. It's a bad luck omen!

Godada:



Go to badoo or any hook up site, get someone, arrange and satisfy your urge.

Let me be frank with you. You cannot bed a lady you want to date when you are sexually starved. It rubs them the wrong way.

That's what's wrong with you.

How can you be on a first date and be insinuating sex up and down. Na only olosho go chest that matter.

Having a relationship takes time to grow if that's what you want but I may be mistaken because what I see here is that you want action.

Mikocake:
Op stop the masturbation and hit the gym. Funnel those frustrations into becoming a better man both financially and physically. Maybe the universe is trying to push you to the right path. Believe me, women will never fill that emptiness you feel inside of you. They can only amplify it.
Ask God to lead you to your purpose and show you the way, believe me when you finally have a purpose every other thing will fall into place.
Many relationships in this era is not worth it mehn, cuz most is gonna break you down even more.
You’re in a vulnerable condition and any heartbreak at this point could ruin you. And believe me when I say, most girls of this generation will surely break you down.
What you need now is a solid fountain, set your priorities right. The emptiness you fill stems from lack of purpose, believe me. Once you find purpose, learn to love yourself and take care of yourself before thinking about relationships. How can you love a girl when you don’t even love yourself?

Cheer up man. Every man once passed through this stage.
At this stage, it should be only you and your hustle. If any banny stumble on your way, nack and move. But never feel dependent on a pssy cuz they come and go.

Love800:
You dont have a direction in life.

Am not insulting you.

Quote me for more clarification.

Itooweak4una:


Clarify please

Love800:
What do you want in a relationship?
What is your long-term goal with her?

Itooweak4una:


Any girl i get in a relationship, the plan is to marry her of course.