Anger management is a fundamental principle in the marriage institution. Perhaps the best weapon to defeat anger is logic. Anger is emotional and when it is allow and outcome is always destructive in many ways.

Anger is a process, much like every other thin in life, it starts like a seemingly harmless thing to do, with the hope of achieving result which in most cases is personally motivated or interest based, until it mature into as monster within seconds.

The following are some of the ways to keep anger under check in any marriage, because cumulative anger over a given period is detrimental to the overall physical and emotional health of any individual.

Dignity: Whenever you are angered by your spouse, try and consider the dignity of the family that is at stake if the monster is not curtailed.

Superior argument: Another useful tool for battling anger is superior argument. The audacity of superior arguments cannot be over emphasizing in conflict resolution between couples. E very relationship is bound to have it own ups and down. Yours is not peculiar, others have gone through the same path and came out stronger, s there is no justification why yours should be otherwise.

Peaceful mindset: a soft reply is antithetical to the growth of anger. Nothing suppresses anger the way a soft response does. It is very frustrating when the person intends to frustrate you in any way they can by getting you on the anger gear.

Preview the outcome of the fiasco before involving yourself more: This is a discerning creativity; you do that by seeing the outcome of the problem with the third mind eyes. Except you are violent prone, otherwise no right thinking person will continue with n action that the outcome is definitely going to be unpleasant in many ways.

Mood control: The last thing to do is to h=be in control of your mood, this is very important because anger is very contagious.





Anger is a way by which some people thrive, they are use to violence and to them violence and anger is the only way they know how to.

That is why some spouse intentional get the mate in the anger highway of destruction, it is important for every one especially those in marriage to understand the way transfer aggression s having impact in their relationship.

Mr. Anderson is the husband of Lillian, Lillian is a hot tempered woman while

Anderson is a cool headed gentle man, the wife is not very comfortable with the way her husband is taking care of things, while in actual fact Mr. Anderson is very open and broad minded about his wife and their marriage.

One day the woman gets hold of the man preventing him from going to the office until he gives the wife an outrageous amount that she doesn’t need after all.

All because she wants to get the husband angry, maybe she enjoys the anger mood and for her that is just ok to prove whatever point there is.

Or she is in another instance exploiting the vulnerability of the husband to torment him, she knows quite well the husband doesn’t do well with anger, and getting angry is the last thing he hopes to get into.


Anderson responded by keeping his cool, he control himself and never allowed the rant of his wife to get into his head despite rough handling of the man by the woman, he said nothing.

Reason: Anderson hates to be manipulated, because when people get you to do what you don't want or like, you have been manipulated. Like getting angry when you know very well that doing that is against you ethics.

What to do

Build your core values: core values are fundamental principle that couples can adopt as way of dealing with their marital problems.

Build Trust: One major cause of problem in marriage is lack of trust, trust is very crucial o every marriage and marriages are advice to make rust one of their cardinal point.

Commitment: Every committed marriage is bound to succeed, commitment does not require finance, and hence it is not a criterion to be use as an excuse.

Couples ought to be very dedicated and committed in making their marriage work. Without commitment, a marriage is sour, without love and fun.'

Intimacy: intimacy is a block builder; it is the main thing in every marriage and must be treated as such. It is such a wonderful thing to know when couples are so intimate with one another.

Going to functions together, to churches, mosque and other religious group’s together, going n a vacation as a family and couples is a wonderful thing.

Applying this little principle is worth more than what you can imagine.

Save that marriage now, by swallowing pride and ego, make it work by working harder.

annoying bit is that good stuff like this hardly makes the front page - everyone on Nairaland is angry

All the same there is always hope in every situation that seams to have a semblance of hopelessness. It's all good in Nigeria.