My friend, who is a black American, recently married a Nigerian man, and confided in me that she received a lot of backlash from Nigerian women (via facebook) for doing so. She told me how she was receiving messages from women asking her why couldn't she find a man her own race, how jealous they were of her for taking a good Nigerian man, and how she's not good enough for a Nigerian man. The harrassment became so much that she had to deactivate her account.

I observed that the kind of backlash she received is very similar, equal, in fact, to the attitude many black American women have about black men marrying white women, or latinas, or asians. So I want to know, is this a general opinion among Nigerian woman toward even black Americans who marry Nigerian men? Or was my friend's experience and isolated event from a select group of jealous women?

Let me also say that I, too, am a black American married to a Nigerian man, and I have not experienced any backlash (that I'm aware of). My experience seems to be that I have been welcomed with open arms into the Igbo/Nigerian society. My friend's husband is also the relative of a very prominent figure in the local Nigerian community here, and my husband is practically unknown. So I don't know if that's a factor, too.

Insecure women and men will make an a$$ out of themselves. Ignore them. As long as you are not setting out to "make nigerian women jealous" or are with the guy for reasons other than love it shouldnt matter what they think (I say the same for interracial dating). Its your life and if its about L.O.V.E then "do you!"

your friend is lying through her teeth

most nigerian women will actually embrace you warmly and try hard to make you nigerianized!  at least that's what I will do. I will only dislike you if you want to keep forming oyinbo or AA.
maybe she has a bad attitude.

dtanigwe:


Let me also say that I, too, am a black American married to a Nigerian man, and I have not experienced any backlash (that I'm aware of). My experience seems to be that I have been welcomed with open arms into the Igbo/Nigerian society. My friend's husband is also the relative of a very prominent figure in the local Nigerian community here, and my husband is practically unknown. So I don't know if that's a factor, too.

yea I can tell just from looking at ur profile pic. you're pretty

and yes if he is a prominent figure in the Nigerian community, I can see where the backlash is coming from. maybe's he's not being a good role model for the community he's supposed to be leading.
but you say he is the brother of the figure so I don't see why there should be any concern about him.

What makes Nigerian women different from Black american women, are they not the same race? or they just hating jus because they're slaves child or something?

Tosinville:

What makes Nigerian women different from Black american women, are they not the same race? or they just hating jus because they're slaves child or something?

different cultures my dear. color and race means nothing.
just like a igbo will become a foreigner in the midst of hausas despite having the same race.

aight jenifa, if its about culture then i understand now but i don't really believe that her friend, Nigerian women don't hate over their men dating/married some other race or AA, things like that can only occur if you snatch their bfz

Well, not to say she is a bad person, she's not, I can admit her attitude can be a little harsh, to say it nicely, but there shouldn't be any way women all the way in Nigeria should be hating on her because of it here in the states unless somebody who knows her is taking info back home to them. What she gets locally I can kinda understand.

lol. I think she actually told me one of the women used to date her hubby! So that's probably it!

^^Yeah! i also think so, Nigerian women don't just hate because they see their men dating another, naw! i don't just believe that or else the Nigerian girl & ur friend were both dating that Nigerian guy simultaneously.

She need to change her circle of women she deals with because the Nigerian women I know personally doesn't act like that.

Few of them aren't even married to Nigerian men. I don't think many of them could care less, but then again who knows.

Just do you.