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The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding - Romance - Nairaland

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The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Sweetlemon(f): 4:07pm On Sep 15, 2014
They assume ownership of a bride once the bride price has been paid. If the girl is lucky enough they will do traditional wedding but the white or even court wedding will be till further notice. In fact, unless a girl's family are strong Christians who will insist on the complete wedding rites before allowing their daughter move in permanently with man, the man will not think seriously about a formal wedding.

The thing is that most girls are too willing to allow this happen. Unless they pester the man for a court or white wedding, they will wait a long long time, after dropping one or two kids before having this. But their wives don't seem to be very serious about this. I mean, this trend is becoming too rampant nowadays. A good case study is that of P Square duo. (I love P Square and their brides not saying this to hate o) All the other celebs did both trad and white almost immediately after. Yet the P Square family even their brother Jude, are not about taking their brides down the aisle. I know a few girls personally who are doing this.

Ladies please let's be very careful with this issue. A church or at least a court wedding is more solid. With a traditional or just introduction, the man can wake up one morning and throw you out of the house, bring in another woman and there is little or nothing you can do. But when documents have been signed, you get the opportunity to fight for rights to property, fair treatment, etc if you can get a good lawyer. Also, with a certificate, your marriage is recognized anywhere in the world. For instance, without a marriage certificate, your "hubby" living abroad cannot invite you over abroad as it's done in most countries. You will have to go through another route.

Please if you are in this kind of arrangement, use all wisdom available to you to get yourself an official document. The longer you procrastinate, the more difficult it will be for the man to finally tie the knot while you live in his house.

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Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Nobody: 4:24pm On Sep 15, 2014
ma'am, it is relative. Neither will church or court determine a solid marriage.

It does not matter how/where the marriage is conducted; what matter most is the
love that will keep them.

White wedding/court marriage isn't our custom, but traditional marriage is. We have sold
our rights to the whites, which is what has almost given them the temerity to impose gay/lesbanism
on us.

How about you turn the table around and ask them to wed in your own custom,huh?

In case you never knew, 2 Italians has broken the record when they wedded in the igbo tradition
a few months back. so, you see?


Edit
100 likes and counting. Dies... Wake... Dies... Wake up... Dies...

And first to comment? Vex... Tears shirt, remove trouser... Remove boxers... Begin catwalk '
grin grin

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Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by makazona(m): 4:26pm On Sep 15, 2014
ur instance is jaudiced

*modified*
Front Page tins even without nairaland app.
U see eh,court/white wedding without real luv = grin

13 Likes 2 Shares

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Nobody: 4:32pm On Sep 15, 2014
Buh traditional marriage is d most important. Must u wear white gown?

173 Likes 3 Shares

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Nobody: 4:36pm On Sep 15, 2014
Blebleswag: Buh traditional marriage is d most important. Must u wear white gown?
I tire o

37 Likes 2 Shares

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Sweetlemon(f): 4:41pm On Sep 15, 2014
2sExy1: ma'am, it is relative. Neither will church or court determine a solid marriage.

It does not matter how/where the marriage is conducted; what matter most is the
love that will keep them.

White wedding/court marriage isn't our custom, but traditional marriage is. We have sold
our rights to the whites, which is what has almost given them the temerity to impose gay/lesbanism
on us.

How about you turn the table around and ask them to wed in your own custom,huh?

In case you never knew, 2 Italians has broken the record when they wedded in the igbo tradition
a few months back. so, you see?



Lol!

Those Italians will not be recognized without an official document even in Nigerian courts not talk of their own country.

You missed the emphasis on the legal document and not necessarily the ceremony.

24 Likes

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Sweetlemon(f): 4:42pm On Sep 15, 2014
Blebleswag: Buh traditional marriage is d most important. Must u wear white gown?

I guess you are female.

Take my advise and get an official document. Thank me later.

31 Likes 1 Share

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Nobody: 4:43pm On Sep 15, 2014
Majority of the people I have seen do this aren't learned. I haven't seen any learned person do it around me...

Sometimes circumstance leads to that, maybe the babe gets preg, and they start postponing it till after the birth of the child...and keep postponing it.

I think it's ideal to do a court marriage@least. To make the marriage recognised by the law...just incase. lipsrsealed

I haven't done court marriage though. My friends keep telling me to force my hubby to do it, so I can be entitled to his fortune, like they don't pray for me to make good money too...rubbish.

76 Likes 3 Shares

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Nobody: 4:44pm On Sep 15, 2014
Sweetlemon:

Lol!

Those Italians will not be recognized without an official document.

You missed the emphasis on the legal document and not necessarily the ceremony.
I am more concerned about a home. I put it to you now and here: How does document develop human brain to ensure a marriage stand the test of time?

50 Likes 1 Share

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Sweetlemon(f): 4:44pm On Sep 15, 2014
Kachisbarbie: Majority of the people I have seen do this aren't learned. I haven't seen any learned person do it around me...

Sometimes circumstance leads to that, maybe the babe gets preg, and dey start postponing it till after birth of the child...and keep postponing it.

I think it's ideal to do a court @least. Make the marriage recognised by the law...just incase. lipsrsealed

I haven't done court marriage though. My friends keep telling me to force my hubby to do it, so I can be entitled to his fortune, like they don't pray for me to make good money too...rubbish.

Ah. You will be surprised many learned people are doing it nowadays. I gave the Okoyes as example. As for your own case, you are good to go as long as you ain't living with him yet.

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Sweetlemon(f): 4:46pm On Sep 15, 2014
2sExy1: I am more concerned about a home. I put it to you now and here: How does document develop human brain to ensure a marriage stand the test of time?

Potential legal wedding hater alert. Ladies be warned.

14 Likes 1 Share

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by 100Cents: 4:51pm On Sep 15, 2014
Blebleswag: Buh traditional marriage is d most important. Must u wear white gown?

Thank you.

Poster is more interested in fighting for her rights to property.. She is not even a Christian as she mentioned divorce as an option..

God may I dodge all the girls with poster mentality in Jesus name. Amen..

164 Likes 6 Shares

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Rival(m): 4:52pm On Sep 15, 2014
Una c why dis marriage tin dey tia me? You come and fight me over my own sweat?
Anyways, it's a choice! If you're not comfortable with the trad. take a walk!

57 Likes

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by 100Cents: 4:52pm On Sep 15, 2014
Kachisbarbie: Majority of the people I have seen do this aren't learned. I haven't seen any learned person do it around me...

Sometimes circumstance leads to that, maybe the babe gets preg, and dey start postponing it till after birth of the child...and keep postponing it.

I think it's ideal to do a court @least. Make the marriage recognised by the law...just incase. lipsrsealed

I haven't done court marriage though. My friends keep telling me to force my hubby to do it, so I can be entitled to his fortune, like they don't pray for me to make good money too...rubbish.

My kind of woman.

Do make I invite you come my own wedding o..
Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Iaz93: 4:53pm On Sep 15, 2014
This thread was created out of fear. grin

Church/court wedding or no church/court wedding, any union that will last, will last!

52 Likes 2 Shares

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Rival(m): 4:53pm On Sep 15, 2014
100Cents:

Thank you.

Poster is more interested in fighting for her rights to property.. She is not even a Christian as she mentioned divorce as an option..

God may I dodge all the girls with poster mentality in Jesus name. Amen..

Amen.

16 Likes

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Nobody: 4:53pm On Sep 15, 2014
Sweetlemon:

I guess you are female.

Take my advise and get an official document. Thank me later.
U said 'and d women seems nt 2 border' dats because its not dat important, cos if it was, I trust ma Ninja women na. Do u knw that most Nigeria men married on credit? Lik didn't paid bride-prize on d woman? U re here talkin abt white/court watever. Not dat is nt gud O. Or wil u ve prefer white/court marriage n decline traditional's?

3 Likes

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Nobody: 4:56pm On Sep 15, 2014
100Cents:

Thank you.

Poster is more interested in fighting for her rights to property.. She is not even a Christian as she mentioned divorce as an option..

God may I dodge all the girls with poster mentality in Jesus name. Amen..
Hehehe....

1 Like

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Iaz93: 4:57pm On Sep 15, 2014
Sweetlemon:

I guess you are female.

Take my advise and get an official document. Thank me later.
Leave BleBle alone.

She wouldn't thank you later. tongue

6 Likes

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Sweetlemon(f): 4:57pm On Sep 15, 2014
100Cents:
Thank you.
Poster is more interested in fighting for her rights to property.. She is not even a Christian as she mentioned divorce as an option..
God may I dodge all the girls with poster mentality in Jesus name. Amen..

I am interested in my dignity. It's not just about property. It's about having a rightful place. You men can be funny a times even when you have the best intentions. It's important for women to be protected. Also you need documents to be recognized as a couple should you guys live outside Nigeria especially when issues come up and only a document can clear such.

28 Likes 1 Share

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by 100Cents: 4:58pm On Sep 15, 2014
Blebleswag:
U said 'and d women seems nt 2 border' dats because its not dat important, cos if it was, I trust ma Ninja women na. Do u knw that most Nigeria men married on credit? Lik didn't paid bride-prize on d woman? U re here talkin abt white/court watever. Not dat is nt gud O. Or wil u ve prefer white/court marriage n decline traditional's?

I am appalled she used Peter Okoye who did only traditional wedding out of choice.

What of most Nigerian men who cannot raise good money to cover both traditional and church weddings ?

7 Likes

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Iaz93: 5:01pm On Sep 15, 2014
100Cents:

Thank you.

Poster is more interested in fighting for her rights to property.. She is not even a Christian as she mentioned divorce as an option..

God may I dodge all the girls with poster mentality in Jesus name. Amen..
Amen oh!
Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Nobody: 5:01pm On Sep 15, 2014
[quote
author=Sweetlemon]

I am interested in my dignity. It's not just about property. It's about
having a rightful place. You men can be funny a times even when you have
the best intentions. It's important for women to be protected. [/quote]




Sweetheart,may I ask you how much you would contribute to the religious or court marriage of people who would be bent on obeying this your stand May I remind you that we ladies always want a "high key,talk of the society" kind of white wedding which the man may not afford? May I also remind you that there are ladies who are just want to become "mama Junior" to escape peoples taunting when they would start questioning why she is still at her parents house at 35? May I also remind you that some ladies force themselves of these so called "shy" men who might not even be ready for marriage?

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Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Sweetlemon(f): 5:02pm On Sep 15, 2014
Odilafta:



Protected by what ma'm? May I remind you that we ladies always want a "high key,talk of the society" kind of white wedding which the man may not afford?

What is this one saying

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by 100Cents: 5:03pm On Sep 15, 2014
.

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Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by MabraO: 5:06pm On Sep 15, 2014
Only in Nigeria our ladies allow us men to marry them 3-4 times in 2/3 days
Wetin sef
If my wife no like traditional wedding
Na she sabi
No time for one Yeye pastor to tell me how to run my marriage wen he can't even run his

50 Likes 3 Shares

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by psucc(m): 5:12pm On Sep 15, 2014
Na the cost of marriage cos am.

2 Likes

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Nobody: 5:13pm On Sep 15, 2014
Sweetlemon:

Ah. You will be surprised many learned people are doing it nowadays. I gave the Okoyes as example. As for your own case, you are good to go as long as you ain't living with him yet.
I am living with him bc I have done my whit wedding. Never knew the Okoyes are learned.
Anyway by learned here, I don't just mean going to school, bc I have seen people that went to sch and act like were made in stone age and vice-versa.
...the learned I mean here are people that are observing how times are evolving and flowing with it. Not people that say it isn't our culture, it isn't our culture yet my grandparents did it in the 1940s...and my great grand parents did it too

@blebleswag: you asking if sum1 wud prefer having court/white to having trad.
-lets leave white aside.
-how much is court marriage. The last time I checked it was about 10k, and there wasn't need for entertainment.
...so that's not a fair inference/reason.
Some people wud do big trad and no white, why not leave the big trad and use that money for white.

@100cents : you never ready o. When you are ready, I will know.

I love my parents though, time for traditional rites, my parents came into the country, did the needed. My dad said, I don't want u to do big trad and say ur money has finished, I don't want trad, pls when you guys fix a date, mail your IV to me.
My father in-law being a traditional man was fighting for the Big-trad, me I say I no want o. Bc wetin I wan use that money do, dey my mind already....mbok....lol.

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Sweetlemon(f): 5:15pm On Sep 15, 2014
Blebleswag:
U said 'and d women seems nt 2 border' dats because its not dat important, cos if it was, I trust ma Ninja women na. Do u knw that most Nigeria men married on credit? Lik didn't paid bride-prize on d woman? U re here talkin abt white/court watever. Not dat is nt gud O. Or wil u ve prefer white/court marriage n decline traditional's?

NLers and their comprehension disablities again. What part of getting a legal document do you not understand? I'm not talking about ceremony here. Just a signed document with witnesses. Please how does that require borrowing? Abi na wheel barrow pusher you wan marry ni?

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by 100Cents: 5:16pm On Sep 15, 2014
Kachisbarbie:
I am living with him bc I have done my whit wedding. Never the Okoyes are learned.
Anyway by learned here, I don't just mean going to school, bc I have seen people that went to sch and act like were made in stone age and vice-versa.
...the learned I mean here are people that are observing how times are evolving and flowing with it. Not people that say it isn't our culture, it isn't our culture yet my grandparents did it in the 1940s...and my great grand parents did it too

@blebleswag: you asking if sum1 wud prefer having court/white to having trad.
-lets leave white aside.
-how much is court marriage. The last time I checked it was about 10k, and there wasn't need for entertainment.
...so that's not a fair inference/reason.
Some people wud do big trad and no white, why not leave the big trad and use that money for white.

@100cents : you never ready o. When you are ready, I will know.

I love my parents though, time for traditional rites, my parents came into the country, did the needed. My dad said, I don't want u to do big trad and say ur money has finished, I don't want trad, pls when you guys fix a date, mail your IV to me.
My father in-law being a traditional man was fighting for the Big-trad, me I say I no want o. Bc wetin I wan use that money do, dey my mind already....mbok....lol.

Respond to my email nah. embarassed

Shebi you said you will call her at your free time ?

I am not a joker in real life oo..
Re: The Growing Trend Of Men Shying Away From Court or White Wedding by Sweetlemon(f): 5:18pm On Sep 15, 2014
Kachisbarbie:
I am living with him bc I have done my whit wedding. Never the Okoyes are learned.
Anyway by learned here, I don't just mean going to school, bc I have seen people that went to sch and act like were made in stone age and vice-versa.
...the learned I mean here are people that are observing how times are evolving and flowing with it. Not people that say it isn't our culture, it isn't our culture yet my grandparents did it in the 1940s...and my great grand parents did it too

@blebleswag: you asking if sum1 wud prefer having court/white to having trad.
-lets leave white aside.
-how much is court marriage. The last time I checked it was about 10k, and there wasn't need for entertainment.
...so that's not a fair inference/reason.
Some people wud do big trad and no white, why not leave the big trad and use that money for white.

@100cents : you never ready o. When you are ready, I will know.

I love my parents though, time for traditional rites, my parents came into the country, did the needed. My dad said, I don't want u to do big trad and say ur money has finished, I don't want trad, pls when you guys fix a date, mail your IV to me.
My father in-law being a traditional man was fighting for the Big-trad, me I say I no want o. Bc wetin I wan use that money do, dey my mind already....mbok....lol.

You no get wahala nau. You are fully married.

Thank God you understand what I mean by document. Please help me explain to them.

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