I don't believe in that kind of condition! This kind of person doesn't have faith in God, what if he married a woman for 5 yrs without issue; and he's family now put mouth for him to have another woman, that means he will listen to his family. He cannot bear with his wife, there is no love there. Am sorry to say oh, guys and men of nowadays are desperate they can do and undo!

Someone said it is the reigning thing and he/she is right.
I have been observing couples for a while now, the only ones that get married and wait
for children are the bornagain ones. Others decide to get married once the girl is pregnant
so even if u cannot see the pregnancy during the wedding wait for a month or two it will show

Many of our marriages have problems that the presence of children help to handle, many women are in their marriages because of their children, the beauty of the children help them to tolerate all that comes., that is why some ladies now sef want to get pregnant before marriage in order not to end up with Korofo -an empty barrel.

Let us be careful both male & female, in as much as few inferterlities have no cause, many are due to past carelessness.

Of course there is some jkind of satisfaction when children come but what of those who bear children and the child is insane

@ Topic

I will look at it from two angles.
1. For a professed man of God, it is wrong. A man is not supposed to "know" his wife until they are legally and tradittionally married. If one is led by God to choose a partner, what comes out of the relationship should not bother one because everything will work together for good.

2. For unbelievers, i will say: YES. It is right. You will be surprised how many abortion some ladies have done. Some have even perforated their wombs or lost it completely in the process and i dont think that an innocent man should be responsible for the lady's careless lifestyle. This request could be likened to HIV, Genotype, Fertility and any other test that people do before wedding.

Marriage is a long term thing that should not be jeopardised by any carelessness on anybody's part. Lack of children will surely jeoperdise the happines of any African family. Let's stop playing saint. So if the couple to be are not believers, they should make that rule, afterall they ve been eating the forbidden fruit!

It all depends on the girl in question whatever she feels about it, but in my opinion if a man should give that as a condition for marriage the man is not worth getting married to as more conditions will still come. My brother was told by our senior brother to make sure his wife is pregnant b4 we can talk of elaborate wedding and he agreed the lady was pregnant and they left Nigeria thereafter and few weeks afte the wedding the lady miscarried it although she now has 2 kids. I was on the other hand given same condition and i objeted it and had my wedding. After my wedding we decided to be alone for 3 years and they felt 'yeh we warned them' but we knew what we were doing after 3 years we lifted the 'ban' and i had a set of beautiful boys. We can not prove to God that we are wise by imposing such condition, anyone who will have kids will have irrespective of the number of abotions and a virgin girl may not be able to get pregnant for years.

Love should be the condition for marriage because things happens. Also more importantly trust in God and please ladies becareful not to fall into wrong marriage because soon if you are blessed with only one sex the guy's mother + the guy himself will send you packing especially if you are blessed with beauties and no handsomes.

The sad thing about  such guys is that they feel real sharp. If you find a desperate babe shebi it's too get pregnant ? the pregnancy sha doesn;t have to be yours ?
Think about it if push comes to shove pregnancy will appear!!!!

u really have to think about it

I understand when some people say that some ladies may be infertile due to abortions but having an abortion doesnt mean that the person must be infertile afterwards. What of some men that sleep with every Janet, Jenniffer, and Jackie and then contact all sorts of STD's that make them impotent. Many Nigerian women believe that not having children are their faults so when they're married to these impotent men (that would rather die than go for tests) they live in agony with the mindset that they are the cause of their childlessness. Like I said, a guy that makes such a demand should undergo every possible test to prove he's not impotent. And pls lets not forget that very healthy couples may find it hard to have children for a long time so its not always caused by being infertile. God gives children.


Some people are happy without kids. Afterall, how many couples with kids are truly happy these days. There are some with kids that even get bored of each other just cause of that fact.

flakey94:

The sad thing about such guys is that they feel real sharp. If you find a desperate babe shebi it's too get pregnant ? the pregnancy sha doesn;t have to be yours ?
Think about it if push comes to shove pregnancy will appear!!!!

We have paternity tests these days, so pregnancies can be verified.

if a guy says that to his chic, then it's obvious they lack mutual understanding and trust in their relationship. both of them should know what they stand for especially when they are God fearing.
some would say 'if u luv me u'll do this for us' that's a fat lie n just an excuse to sin. u must understand that such a condition is a sin against God. if u must stand for God then do so notwithstanding what tradition and culture says, afterall God's greater than ur tradition.

otherwise look at it this way- what if the lady gets pregnant before wedding and the guy later finds out some disgusting things about her
would he leave her or continue with their plans since he's only bothered about his chic  getting pregnant
its a crazy world really

@Bawss1
Thanks for your input & for correcting Seun.

@Seun
That was really shallow minded. The same bible that talks about multiplying also talks about fornication. But that aside, the main purpose of marriage is not having children. Children are only a by-product of marriage. The true purpose is for companionship. And God created man and He saw that it was not fit for him to be alone,
Finally, when the kids grow up and leave the house, who are they leaving behind? By Products always leave!

Seun:

You can have companions without marriage. You can have many companions, not just one!
Marriage exists to enable every child to be brought up by two loving parents. That's all.

Seun are you married?

@ Poster

Marriage has its own challenges at the begin there is no need to complicate it with the challenges of pregnancy and being a mum before you've got a hang of being a wife. Believe me who no go non know.

Be weary of someone who goes against his acclaimed belief. What next? What values would your home be built on. You need to know what he really believes and what yardstick would used for making decisions in your home. Would it be God's word or what suits him or outside influences? These are serious issues if you do not take a stand now you can not do so later and you may have lost it forever.

If your ability to have children is that important to him then why not a medical examination as some kind of compromise and assurance to him but he has to go through it too.

This issue of getting marriage B4 wedding is really a big wahala. we deviate from the laid down rules of GOD by indulging in fornication , in short legalizing fornication.
Ladies should braze up and make themselves trustable,me self go play safe ooo because all the ladies way dey around are half barren.

Marriage was created primarily for companionship, every other thing is secondary (child bearing inclusive)

If a couple cannot have children of thier own, then they should explore other options (e.g. adoption, surrogate parents, etc)

@POST and ALL
The idea of getting pregnant is not the issue, but first are we all agreeing that having sex with ur partner b4 marriage is right, if it is rite then getting pregnant is not any issue but if it is wrong to sleep with ur partner b4 marriage then how will u get pregnant,
cos sex b4 marriage is NOT ALLOWED QED

Na una sabi

Remember that one sin leads to another, if it is good to have sex b4 marriage then if the guy goes an extra mile to ask for pregnance b4 marriage is also not wrong. so lets agree is sex b4 marriage rite cos is the sametin

that was the same thing i said earlier, pre-marital sex is wrong.

is sex before marriage rite?

the answere is 100+%  wrong

as for me, i pray everyday that my would be wife does not get pregnant before marriage.

may God answer my prayers. amen.

Carlosein:

as for me, i pray everyday that my would be wife does not get pregnant before marriage.

may God answer my prayers. amen.

the answer to your prayer lies between your legs dear.dont get God involved.CHIKENA

Carlosein:

as for me, i pray everyday that my would be wife does not get pregnant before marriage.

may God answer my prayers. amen.

Bros so u don dey do the thing! U wan make God help u cover ur sins!! U dey lie to urself

seun, u r speaking my mind. I think u r sincere.
those guys/ladies in favour of companionship should go for same-sex-marriage, if marriage is all about companionship, love, respect bla bla bla,

True African man believes that marriage is 90% child rearing n' 10% for d rest.

@showbobo and poster
d gal dat is doin abortions,did she pregnant her self?is a man dat pregnanted her as well.
am tired of this fingerpointin at women.the men are  to blame as well.abeg come down frm ur highhorse.
if a woman can say yes to a marrige proposal knowin dat d man comes wit faults as well,y wont d guy accept her
with her faults.any man givin such a condition is selfish,and not worth my worryin over,and i would take a hike because he dosent deserve me.
Imagine such insensitivity.infact women shuld start givin their own demands as well.

hello house
Child prcreation is a blessing in Marriage and its only God that determines that. He is all knowing!

u no

The life we live affects the decisions we take.
A morally upright man( No sexual relations prior to marriage) will not make such a request .
Dont fear for the woman because,
YOU WILL ATTRACT THE TYPE THE TYPE OF PERSON YOU ARE.

@seun

u are right child rearing is the true purpose of marriage, and maybe the guy feels that she could have had abortions and cant have children anymore.

But isnt the point to get married FIRST THEN HAVE THE KID. hmm anyway if she absolutely wants to do this, have him tested, extensively, but the marriage must happen before the 2nd month of that pregnancy.

Advice to naija sisters please u guys should use condoms, it disgusts me how many chicks dont. carry the damn thing yourself, if u can Bleep, y cant u buy a condom. tomorrow u get pregnant, get abortions and then cant have children, because of the bootleg doctor u went to that has messed up your cervix.

[pre][/pre] dats bullshit
any lady dat wants 2 get pregnant b4 marriage is just deperate

That is so lame, see I always say, when I get married, the first year and half, NO KID!, yeah, cos everything might be great when u guys are not living together, but the first year of marriage u begin to see d other side of him that's u've not seen b4, then u want to get out of that marriage b4 it's too late but u can't cos u guys have kids already, it's hard to separate, guy wey tell me say I must get belle b4 him marry me na thunder go fire am!

I don't think any lady should agree with such a guy because she no wan lose am,

Why are u all attacking seun as if he is the man? If a man gives you condition before marriage and if you are comfortable with it, that's your business and if you said no!! that's left for the both of you to sort things out. A man would not make such condition without reasons?

So, please leave seun alone for God sake! haba!! The man talk watin dey for em belle, una just dey crucify am as if na him be the man or na him tell the man make e give the girl condition.

CHILDREN AREN'T GOOD FOR A DOOMED MARRIAGE

BUT A HEALTHY MARRIAGE IS GOOD FOR CHILDREN


Don't start a marriage with the intention of using kids as a means to save it in case it's drowning.

If you can't do anything as an adult, what do you think a little baby can do.

This idea that kids make a happier home is stupid.

Kids alone can't guarantee the success of a marriage.

When it's doomed, it is doomed.

Those who think having kids is a solution will only have themselves to blame when the child itself is corrupt by the unhealthy surrounding!

It sickens me to think that one would like to impregnate a lady before they get married