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The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. - Literature (2) - Nairaland

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Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by Nobody: 4:47pm On Aug 07, 2012
U try.
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by masterpiecer(m): 4:48pm On Aug 07, 2012
Cuddlemii:

I totally agree with you on that. Some children raised by single parents are far more lucrative, industrious, successful, ambitious, determined & career driven more than the ones raised by both parents. Cos they were limited to certain things,it propels them to strive hard to make a statement & give their single parent a credible name.

I agree with u but to some extent, thank God u said some children, truth is, some, but not most.
Most single parent children turn out wayward, cases where they turn out good is when the single parent had to go the extra mile to make sure the child is properly brought up, i'm not saying that some of the kids brought up by both parents might not turn out wayward, but on a large scale, wayward children are mostly product of broken homes/marraiges.

2 Likes

Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by ireke(m): 4:53pm On Aug 07, 2012
Quote - ebamma: seminars,and e-books,are sometimes a waste of time and money,the greatest inspiration a man can have is his will to achieve something.

"Experienece is the best teacher". What they don't tell you is that it is often very expensive (and sometimes disastrously late) to learn from your own experience. I assure you that it is more fun to learn from other people's experience. Reading and attending seminars help you to achieve just that.

1 Like

Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by honeric01(m): 4:53pm On Aug 07, 2012
Nice, those who surely needs this should think well, digest this piece.
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by honeric01(m): 4:56pm On Aug 07, 2012
Cuddlemii:

I totally agree with you on that. Some children raised by single parents are far more lucrative, industrious, successful, ambitious, determined & career driven more than the ones raised by both parents. Cos they were limited to certain things,it propels them to strive hard to make a statement & give their single parent a credible name.

These few set did all these things not because they were raised by a single parent but because they decided to take their destiny into their hands, they are few in number. Now what happens to the rest?
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by mylunch: 4:57pm On Aug 07, 2012
[quote author=Cuddlemii]

I totally agree with you on that. Some children raised by single parents are far more lucrative, industrious, successful, ambitious, determined & career driven more than the ones raised by both parents. Cos they were limited to certain things,it propels them to strive hard to make a statement & give their single parent a credible name. [/quote I think you have a point,I know a friend who was raised by a single parent,with God's help she has done so well for herself,she studied abroad,and now she is a doctor doing too too well.
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by Ninilowo(m): 5:01pm On Aug 07, 2012
ebamma: so all this theory were you dey write na because you wan sell your books
oh hooo! I wonder o. and people are here commending him. some one wrote a book titled "HOW TO MAKE MILLIONS" and people were rushing to buy the books thereby making millions for him and he does not make use of any of the ideas in his own book. can u seea sense in that? all these epistle is to advertise one whatever. naija I hail oo.

2 Likes

Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by Hemanwel(m): 5:05pm On Aug 07, 2012
Honestly,I waz readin dis piece n I felt like it neva ended.
@ebamma,u seem 2 b a confused specie.
@op...bravo!
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by bid4rich(m): 5:05pm On Aug 07, 2012
Nice one guy! It shows that the way you put your mind to use will make the world to mind you.

More from your end, man.

1 Like

Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by Yahoo1(m): 5:23pm On Aug 07, 2012
@OP.....ur not the first person 2 say that,adn u wont be the last,although i believe you're right,but i also know you just want to sell whatever you want to sell!...but i think whichever it is,doesnt hide d fact that its a very nice write up,@least lets take a break from all dis bad news we dey hear.
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by emsquare(m): 5:39pm On Aug 07, 2012
On point!
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by ajf(m): 5:44pm On Aug 07, 2012
So you've done all this preaching because of your seminar? I would have loved this if not for that advertisement shiooorrr smh...
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by Cuddlemii: 5:46pm On Aug 07, 2012
masterpiecer:

I agree with u but to some extent, thank God u said some children, truth is, some, but not most.
Most single parent children turn out wayward, cases where they turn out good is when the single parent had to go the extra mile to make sure the child is properly brought up, i'm not saying that some of the kids brought up by both parents might not turn out wayward, but on a large scale, wayward children are mostly product of broken homes/marraiges.

First of all, a child belongs to the world and not its parents. Even if parents give proper home training and does everything with no errors detected, its up to the child to live by those principles or get influenced by the bad things of the world. That is why you see pastors, presidents and all having problems with their kids. Its your sole responsibility to decide which path you want to thread. Parents can only teach & guide you.

As for a child with a single parent. Different things come to play
1) Appreciation: It would always be registered on the child's mind or psyche that he is raised by a parent performing the function of two parents. That, the single parent could have opt and left too but stayed back to nurture him/her and show how special he/she is. That child would always have that compassion and consideration in its doings. The child would always want his single parent to be proud.

2) Consciousness: The child would know that its a reflection of the single parent as such if he/she screws up, fingers would be pointed at the single parent and there would be additional humiliation. So the child would always have that fear & conscience not to screw up and shame the single parent further.

3) Determination: The child would want to strive hard to make it. Would want to be a success to reckon with so that he/she can brag of its achievement to the other parent who left or to the world that castigated the child & the single parent.

4) Hardwork & independence: They are driven to live a life they never had. They work hard to make it and give their single parent little pampering before they leave the earth. They are supportive & won't mind roasting corn to survive with their parent because their parent is re-writing their own wrong doings with raising a child on its own.

5) Moderation: Obviously everyone gets naughty in life, its part of the learning experience even pastors confess that they were once bad but too much of everything is not good. Most children from a single parent know when to draw the line, remember they know what is at stake and would always feel obligated.

6) Family: They turn out to be good parents & spouse because they don't want what happened to them to occur to their family. They become more understanding,respectful and their single parent would also be very careful so as not to break its child's home or render him/her to what he/she was or went through.

7) Humility: Most children with two parents are arrogant and flaunt their luxury at will. They are sometimes mannerless and rude because they don't know the worth of having a complete family. They are not exposed to hardship & they are not thankful. You would always hear things like this from them "If mummy doesn't buy me the pearls that cost a fortune, daddy will".

In conclusion, a child has its destiny on earth to fulfill whether or not its parents screwed up theirs. The child should not use that as an excuse but identify right from wrong and the path that suits him/her.

2 Likes

Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by IleIfe2(m): 6:07pm On Aug 07, 2012
hmmm nice, I'm really inspired.
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by duni04(m): 7:18pm On Aug 07, 2012
I think its very irresponsible to diss the whole of society just cos ur chasing a sell out crowd at ur seminar. I think what you just did, on its own, is one of the major flaws of society; where people will say anything or do anything just to make a buck. Try to point out the flaws of society without seeking to benefit from them, then I'll treat u with some respect.

1 Like

Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by hardbody: 7:21pm On Aug 07, 2012
ireke:

Bros Nothing do you. I hope you are pretty satisfied with your life as it is. I also hope you won't complain when people that sacrifice to improve themselves are reaping the rewards. I just wonder how people expect to gain knowledge when they won't read. if na romance and s.exual stories there will little or no complain about the length. Yab me if you think I deserve it o. but I read the lengthy article and numerous "useless" pieces of information that i have garnered from years of active reading has helped me in almost all aspects of my life.

@ OP, it's funny how people don't read. I remember I dropped a friend in my final year in the university not because he said that he had not read any other book apart from his school books, but he did not see any need for reading any motivational book because he believed he was good enough. Afterall the books were written by men like himself. I dropped him like hot stone because I knew I had a long way to go and I neede to learn from so many sources.

Keep reading. Whenever i read, i get a kick out of it because i make money reading, not adverts on facebook on how to self-train. I am particular about this material not on the reading habit. You have a brain (supposedly), use it dummy
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by Nobody: 7:32pm On Aug 07, 2012
''these days, the students pass through the University without the university passing through them'' - A Prof. from SW university.

@OP, Summary of UR write up.

We are seeing the rise in MENTAL LAZINESS among the African BB generation.

mute4real:
[b] I see a dearth of knowledge all around.

You will be surprised to know that for some of these trainings only 700 people participate out of over 20,000 members. And these are trainings that go for as high as N100,000 in the corporate world.

I advice the young ladies, I am focusing on you because you are at the frontline of the receiving end of the ills of the society. I advice the young ladies, there is more to life than “my boyfriend dresses well and smells good.

It’s high time you started asking the right questions.

How much of his budget does he invest on Personal Development?

How many books did he buy in the last six months?

How many has he read? What did he learn?

When was the last time he spent his own money, not the company’s, to attend a training session for himself. You need to have an answer for these questions because perfumes never made any marriage work.

Any marriage where the woman has a flare for personal development and the man does not, can never be a happy one.

I promise you, many of you will be shocked to discover that that guy you’ve been kissing for more than a year now, has not bought a single book in the last one year. That means all he knows now is still the same things he knew like 3 or 5 yrs ago. Except maybe that Jonathan did not have any shoes.

I have met guys who never bought a book in the last 5yrs but never failed to renew their DSTV subscription.

And when you are the type that wants to spend your Saturdays attending seminars and your husband sits at home to watch football, then trouble is brewing. Why not nip it in the bud now? It may hurt but you will be saving yourself a lifetime of pain.

In the United States today, the ratio of educated black girls to guys in the corporate world is about 3:1. There are not enough good guys to go around anymore so sex is now being used as a weapon to keep the few good black guys.

[/b]
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by ekitikan(m): 7:33pm On Aug 07, 2012
comechop: Seems like a good read - but hard to follow. Would help if you made some bullet points and/or summary at the end.

You ppl and summary sha. You carry baby for hand ni wey dey disturb u frm reading.
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by ethereal(f): 7:35pm On Aug 07, 2012
Nice one ....bt releasing my personal details online?i no dey house!
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by courage89(m): 7:49pm On Aug 07, 2012
duni04: I think its very irresponsible to diss the whole of society just cos ur chasing a sell out crowd at ur seminar. I think what you just did, on its own, is one of the major flaws of society; where people will say anything or do anything just to make a buck. Try to point out the flaws of society without seeking to benefit from them, then I'll treat u with some respect.

I think there is a difference between dissing and educating. First, awareness has to be created before problem can be solved. Trying to solve a problem without a full grasp of the problem is a recipe for disaster. And i think that was, and still the sole objective of the author. If you find value in what the author is saying, then you can pay for it. The author is not forcing anybody to partake in the seminar. Plus, people value more what they pay or are paying for in the name of getting their money's worth.

I think it is a matter of "interpretation".

1 Like

Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by Kayuzze1: 7:58pm On Aug 07, 2012
ireke:

Bros Nothing do you. I hope you are pretty satisfied with your life as it is. I also hope you won't complain when people that sacrifice to improve themselves are reaping the rewards. I just wonder how people expect to gain knowledge when they won't read. if na romance and s.exual stories there will little or no complain about the length. Yab me if you think I deserve it o. but I read the lengthy article and numerous "useless" pieces of information that i have garnered from years of active reading has helped me in almost all aspects of my life.

@ OP, it's funny how people don't read. I remember I dropped a friend in my final year in the university not because he said that he had not read any other book apart from his school books, but he did not see any need for reading any motivational book because he believed he was good enough. Afterall the books were written by men like himself. I dropped him like hot stone because I knew I had a long way to go and I neede to learn from so many sources.
pretty good man.. Check out yourself and your friend now.. Did reading of those 'motivational' books put you far ahead of your friend nw? One thing i learnt from all this books is that it makes people want to pattern their life alongside that of the author.. Dont get me wrong people, I am not against people reading inspirational or motivational books, but it is not a pre-requisite to acheiving something great.. Instead, your utmost desire to achieve should come first, and making sure you maximize your God's given skills,ability,talent and potential... Once you put this in place, I bet the sky will be your startin point...ponder!
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by DerMeister: 8:19pm On Aug 07, 2012
One of the best posts I have seen on NL, On point about our society going to the dogs!! Nowadays, graduates cannot spell, write grammatically correct sentences or express themselves in an understandable manner. Why is this so? Because they don't read! I heard an old saying, if you want to hide something from a nigerian, put it in black and white! Nowadays, I find it harder and harder to disprove that statement.

1 Like

Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by sweetsmalsis(f): 8:24pm On Aug 07, 2012
nice piece smileynice piece
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by God2man(m): 8:43pm On Aug 07, 2012
mute4real: What I want to share with us today is about the pain of pleasure. We live in a world today where we are literally killing ourselves with pleasure. We are dying everyday, not out of pain as we define it, but out of pleasure. And nobody seems to be saying anything about it. We are amusing ourselves to death and nobody really cares. Stella Damascus, the Nollywood actress, shared in her column in about how a friend of hers was mad at her because when her(the friend’s) kids wanted to watch TV the only channel that the decoder was locked on Nickelodeon and the kids wanted one of the “more interesting” channels like Ben Ten where some real violence take place.

Today, entire families sit in front of the television box and are ingesting pleasure capsules hour after hour not realizing that they are dying. May I suggest to you that just like any other thing in this life, pleasure can be addictive? And the addictive nature of pleasure brings about negative repercussions. I don’t have to be a genius to know that unless urgent measures are taken to fight this addiction we are going to keep seeing an increase in divorce rates as families become mere acquaintances of one another. And an increase in divorce rates will lead to an increase in fatherless and motherless homes, which leads to half-prepared children sent out to face the pressure of society, which leads to these kids growing up to be men and women who are not responsible enough to be fathers and mothers themselves but have the tools between their legs to make them have babies. So, when they have kids they abandon them. They never knew what it is like to have a father or a mother so they have no idea how to be one, themselves.

Besides the long term effect of the addictive nature of pleasure like just narrated in the preceding paragraph. I also see that one of the more immediate effects of the pain of pleasure is the reluctance to learn. I see a dearth of knowledge all around. All that is on the minds of recent graduates now is how he or she can get his or her own Blackberry. I hear the cost of a new Blackberry today begins at N20,000 ($130). I even hear that the cost of some go for as high as over N100,000 ($660). Is that true? And when I turn to have a decent conversation with one of these young and beautiful ladies brandishing their Blackberrys all around, I get the shock of my life that all there is is a Brazilian hair and an empty brain. Except for the well developed part of the brain used in pinging.

I and a friend in Benin run what is commonly called a Business Center. Nothing much, just a few copiers, about 10 computers, 2 printers, a scanner, two good digital cameras for passport photographs, etc. You get the drift. He manages the day to day running of the business, since I reside in Lagos. But once a year I go to Benin and spend a couple of weeks there. And whenever I am in Benin, I usually spend some time with him at the shop. In my last but one visit to Benin, I was at the shop with him when a beautiful young lady in her NYSC Khaki pants came in. She needed to work on her CV. The two employees we have working for us are just Senior School Certificate holders, so we just pointed to one of the computer systems for her to use by herself. To my utter disdain she knew nothing about Microsoft Word. Maybe she is only used to Excel, but I doubt that too. It was one of our employees that ended up working on the CV for her. But she had in her hands one of the higher classes of Blackberry. Of course the lower classes are for guys.

I worship in a church where there are over 20,000 regular members. My church seats over 5,000 people per service and holds 4 services every Sunday. And this number does not include children who have a different building. It’s one of the new generation churches. Once in a while corporate trainings are held so members can develop themselves. These trainings are not free but very cheap. As low as N7,000. There was even one that was for N2,500, but the training materials was like N5,000 which was optional. One would expect that for a new generation church where everything from religion to business is being taught there will be a mad rush for such trainings. You will be surprised to know that for some of these trainings only 700 people participate out of over 20,000 members. And these are trainings that go for as high as N100,000 in the corporate world. But why should I spend N5,000 for a training when I can get some good time with my babe in a fast food restaurant with some cups of ice cream?

I advice the young ladies, I am focusing on you because you are at the frontline of the receiving end of the ills of the society. I advice the young ladies, there is more to life than “my boyfriend dresses well and smells good. Hmm! I am so in love with him.” It’s high time you started asking the right questions. How much of his budget does he invest on Personal Development? How many books did he buy in the last six months? How many has he read? What did he learn? When was the last time he spent his own money, not the company’s, to attend a training session for himself. You need to have an answer for these questions because perfumes never made any marriage work. Any marriage where the woman has a flare for personal development and the man does not, can never be a happy one. Just listen to one episode of Real Life issues aired on Inspiration FM 92.3 in Lagos if you doubt me.

If you, referring to the young ladies, would follow through on the advice given on the previous paragraph, I promise you, many of you will be shocked to discover that that guy you’ve been kissing for more than a year now, has not bought a single book in the last one year. That means all he knows now is still the same things he knew like 3 or 5 yrs ago. Except maybe that Jonathan did not have any shoes. I have met guys who never bought a book in the last 5yrs but never failed to renew their DSTV subscription. And when you are the type that wants to spend your Saturdays attending seminars and your husband sits at home to watch football, then trouble is brewing. Why not nip it in the bud now? It may hurt but you will be saving yourself a lifetime of pain.

From my personal projections based on the number of people that have enrolled for the April session of School for Personal Leadership, for the first time in three sessions ladies will outnumber guys by a long pole. And this is a trend that is beginning to show all over the world, especially among the black race. In the United States today, the ratio of educated black girls to guys in the corporate world is about 3:1. There are not enough good guys to go around anymore so sex is now being used as a weapon to keep the few good black guys. The crave for pleasure in the Rap industry is causing a lot of young black brothers to drop out of schools while those ladies in bra and G-strings dancing in the music videos are attending night classes to further their education.

Am I going to continue to see this kind of trend in the School for Personal Leadership that current projection is indicating? More ladies interested in Personal Development than guys? Are guys only interested in buying Blackberrys for the ladies so they can at least get some sex in exchange for it? But I want us all to have a rethink. The problem with the world today is not just pain as we know it. It is pleasure. The pain of pleasure is far worse than any other kind of pain you can think of.

I want to encourage you. If you are the type that has never seen the need to invest in Personal Development, begin with School for Personal Leadership. It holds right on Facebook, completely flexible, you go into the online classroom when it is most convenient for you. You get to meet people from different fields, different states of the nation, and residing in different countries. It is awesome. Come spend some time with other people who have a desire to make a difference in their lives and in the lives of others. Come and learn principles that will change your life forever. All you have to do is to first add me as friend on facebook then send a text in the following format, WSPL*SURNAME*FIRST NAME*SEX*STATE OF RESIDENCE (If in Nigeria) or COUNTRY (If outside Nigeria)*EMAIL ADDRESS*PHONE NUMBER to +234-803-874-9796. Payment details will be sent to you within 24hrs. The fee for this August's special weekend Session is N3,750. God bless you.

Thanks,
Mute Efe,
+234-803-874-9796 (SMS only)
www.facebook.com/mutehimself

N.B
Please leave a comment as an encouragement after reading the note.
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by phemi01(m): 8:44pm On Aug 07, 2012
onnpe arshavin! We have read many stories like this. We know how u ppl wear oversized coats on T.V n lie to ppl on how they can start a biz wit little or no capital all because u want to chop moni frm ur useless seminars. Guy park well! I'll rather spend my money on books than attend one yeye seminar. Besides u ppl dnt always have anything to say than how to become a billionaire that u haven't achieved urself. No be by seminar o! Ayi moye seminar lalagbon. Seminar kor, seminary ni!
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by Chuks0485: 8:50pm On Aug 07, 2012
kunletiwoo: I tire o
i tire pass u 4 dis 1,pple just like talking even wen dia talk no mak sense
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by kodified(m): 8:50pm On Aug 07, 2012
Nairaland will never cease to amaze. Such knowledgeable people. The poster obviously has all the answers. Church books and training!!! I never knew.
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by 10over101: 9:04pm On Aug 07, 2012
Awesome!!! So nice...Talking about books..I have gone through lots of mindblowing and entrepreneurship tinz but u just find out most of the doctrines and teachings of these books are not practicable in nigeria or say Africa at large due to our frustrating system.. Companies and Organizations take business proposals from white guys more serious than those coming from blacks.....Reading books is good but our today society has become something more than books to read..
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by Gabrielsylar(m): 9:13pm On Aug 07, 2012
happy marathon reading....pls can someone kindly summarize dis article....thankxxxxx
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by ono(m): 9:27pm On Aug 07, 2012
Someone left his work - annual pay of some 12 million naira and went back to school. He's in his late 30s, married and with 3 kids. He said he wants to develop himself, increase his knowledge base. There's nothing ''exciting' in what he does everyday at work, he wants new challenges and new way of doing things that comes with higher knowledge.
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by yavo2: 9:50pm On Aug 07, 2012
This personal development you are talking about that costs 100K in the corporate world...what is it that you really teach? what skills do you pass on to these young people you are trying to help? From all you have written, it seems you need to do a rethink on how best to impact your world. Your hypothesis sounds noble but your motive is questionable. Don't ride on the principles of benevolence to achieve your selfish ends. Please be more objective.
Re: The Pain Of Pleasure - A Must Read For Every Lady And Her Boyfriend. by dasparrow: 2:12am On Aug 08, 2012
@Post

I don't do twitter or facebook. I don't believe in giving out or putting my personal details online because I don't trust the wicked world we live in. All the same, nice write up.

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