sapien: ^^ Says who?How did you know?

Because most of the people who come on NL for answers have already made up their mind and are just looking for support

stpat1: Guy the hand writing is on the wall and its obvious that u are insecure and she even knows this and is using it. Yea she has toasters and she making u know it so the ball is in you court. With this is is far gone already.

so what do you advice ? I know am insecure about her though i try not to show it . I have refused to spoil her or spend on her as did her ex,who obviously was more financially bouyant than me.i have only spent what i can afford and will not regret. She told me earlier that i do not monitor her movement like her ex and i have tried not to be obvious in doing that.

IZUKWU: so what do you advice ? I know am insecure about her though i try not to show it . I have refused to spoil her or spend on her as did her ex,who obviously was more financially bouyant than me.i have only spent what i can afford and will not regret. She told me earlier that i do not monitor her movement like her ex and i have tried not to be obvious in doing that.

This girl is playing you and you know it; You need to man up and take control of your life. Having a gf is not everything.....How can you let a woman treat you like this?? So,basically she chills with you when you have money but when you are broke she snubs you and make you feel insecure....If you ask me I will say run as fast as you can...I dont know what is wrong with some of all theseNigerian girls.

Get an alternative.she is a technical gold digger.

sapien: ^^ Says who?How did you know?

Committing suicide is his hobby. Still can't tell how he makes it back here, though.

talina: Why doesnt she have her own money to pay for her hair? Instead she would rather manipulate and upset you? This is not how love works.

So true!!!! What is wrong with her paying for her hair? It's not as though she doesnt work. @poster, I think you knows she is manipulating you, but you dont want to deal with it.

Floxyluv:

So true!!!! What is wrong with her paying for her hair? It's not as though she doesnt work. @poster, I think you knows she is manipulating you, but you dont want to deal with it.

i need pointers ,how do i handle that . What is the best way of dealing with this.

Marry her. Because you can see trouble, but are trying to fix the trouble. So just wake up today and vex and marry her.
I made up this lovely quote to tell my friend who had a oil-worker bf that unfortunately believed his own hype and took her for granted, complaining that she was emotional, calling her selfish because she wasn't having sex and threatening to break up, gave her a phonecall for Val's day and she bought him gifts, got the sex and wasn't satisfied by her perfomance, would ignore her for days but insult her if he sent a bbm and she didn't reply in 10mins, talked to her anyhow, used to vex for her if she wanted to see him, whilst she stupidly kept trying to fix it (he broke up with her, she cried. End of story, she has sharply deleted him and moved on) and it goes:
"When you hear Masquerade music and you start dancing to it, don't be surprised that a masquerade will soon show up and beat you"
OP, you are hearing masquerade music and are dancing. Prepare for flogging.

This morning , she flashed me and i called,she requested that i bring the necklace she left in my house to her house and i asked whether she didn't travel again and she said yes that rainfall prevented her from going again and i asked why she didn't inform me that she was around ,she said that she wanted to rest that if i had known that i would come and she would not be able to rest. I went with the necklace around 8 a.m but instead she asked that i carry her to her friends house whom she saw her miss call in the morning as she woke up and from their to my house ,after she put the house in other . I asked her to cook for me and she is at the market now. I went through her messages i can only see text messages that she exchanged with her ex and in one she was requesting for money for hair and recharge card and the guy was saying she should come to his house and she told him that he wants to catch her and sleep with her and when i asked her ,she said she was just joking with him. I have talked about this her ex in one of my posts last week.

Tygood: Get an alternative.she is a technical gold digger.

will the alternative be better ,this one is working and all these . I have been where i am presently for two years now,this is about the fourth girl am getting close to, in terms demands she is the least demanding and sometimes understand when you say no. Girls here are something else ,sometimes they feel that they entitled to a part of your salary ,one demand after the other.

Yes, I'm laughing and going "masquerade music, oy yo yo yo yo!!"

Seriously, she knows you're insecure about her and anybody who loves another will NEVER let you feel insecure about that love. God is love, and you are 100 percent sure of that love, you should be 80 percent sure of any earthly love. People who keep you on your toes don't like you, even if they marry you. It's an ego-trip to them and they will continue it for as they can. That's human nature. Love is mutual and respectful, why the hell is she asking for recharge card and hair money from ex, which kain dirty joke be dat?
Ore mi, the reason you keep dating demanding girls and my friend keeps dating immature boys is because you choose to date them. That's why I said, "I know there is one nice girl somewhere that you left for this chick, because that one wasn't hot or sexy or fine or was boring". My friend is investing in prayer so she can start choosing men wisely. Suggest you do the same

Onegai: Marry her. Because you can see trouble, but are trying to fix the trouble. So just wake up today and vex and marry her.
I made up this lovely quote to tell my friend who had a oil-worker bf that unfortunately believed his own hype and took her for granted, complaining that she was emotional, calling her selfish because she wasn't having sex and threatening to break up, gave her a phonecall for Val's day and she bought him gifts, got the sex and wasn't satisfied by her perfomance, would ignore her for days but insult her if he sent a bbm and she didn't reply in 10mins, talked to her anyhow, used to vex for her if she wanted to see him, whilst she stupidly kept trying to fix it (he broke up with her, she cried. End of story, she has sharply deleted him and moved on) and it goes:
"When you hear Masquerade music and you start dancing to it, don't be surprised that a masquerade will soon show up and beat you"
OP, you are hearing masquerade music and are dancing. Prepare for flogging.

so i should do what? By the way marriage is not in my plans for now ,may be in two years time . Just starve working two years ago after youth service. But she is not financially prudent. Seems to spend what ever she makes. She just got a new room and wanted me to help out in either the carpet ,curtains or lent but i just paid my lent then and couldn't help,plus financial burdens from my siblings in school. I have been trying to guide her to manage her finances well but she prefers hand outs and i have only helped where i can and when i can.

IZUKWU: will the alternative be better ,this one is working and all these . I have been where i am presently for two years now,this is about the fourth girl am getting close to, in terms demands she is the least demanding and sometimes understand when you say no. Girls here are something else ,sometimes they feel that they entitled to a part of your salary ,one demand after the other.

since you said she's the least demanding, why can't you sit down and talk to her cos I feel she's changing. in this life, girls would always be girls, let her see from your point, putting herself in your shoes. if you love her, you wouldn't want to lose her for this bull

IZUKWU: so i should do what? By the way marriage is not in my plans for now ,may be in two years time . Just starve working two years ago after youth service. But she is not financially prudent. Seems to spend what ever she makes. She just got a new room and wanted me to help out in either the carpet ,curtains or lent but i just paid my lent then and couldn't help,plus financial burdens from my siblings in school. I have been trying to guide her to manage her finances well but she prefers hand outs and i have only helped where i can and when i can.

She has to start learning financial responsibility. Ask yourself this: what does this relationship add to me and to her? You should be improving yourselves. She knows you have responsibilities, yet she's pulling this stunt, and you claim to love her? Dude, check yourself. That my friend I spoke abt earlier, her ex said he was supporting his family and couldn't save. Guess what? She stopped asking for money, helped him with a contract at her office and even gave him a savings plan. Yet your woman is asking for hair money, rent money, furnishings money. Talk abt low standards. Sit your babe down and be very very clear abt this matter, and then you too, watch yourself and work on improving yourself in whatever issue you have with her. If she no gree, Nne, make your choice and either marry her (LOL) or leave her.

IZUKWU: so i should do what? By the way marriage is not in my plans for now ,may be in two years time . Just starve working two years ago after youth service. But she is not financially prudent. Seems to spend what ever she makes. She just got a new room and wanted me to help out in either the carpet ,curtains or lent but i just paid my lent then and couldn't help,plus financial burdens from my siblings in school. I have been trying to guide her to manage her finances well but she prefers hand outs and i have only helped where i can and when i can.

Bro,dump that girl with immediate alacrity!She is a spendthrift!An extravagant fianceé would make a bad wife in the long run.She would wreck your finances!Don't say I never told you!Shun her ravishing beauty,and go look for a modest,faithful,caring and prudent girl to date.With perserverance,you shall meet a lady with the sterling qualities you crave in a prospective fianceé.

O Izukwu, is this what 'love' has turned you into? A wimp? Turning yourself into a willing victim of psychological extortion? Is this what love means to you? A girl that brings out the insecurity in you? A girl that veily constantly reminds you of your social standing and financial position inadvertently telling you there are superior alternatives and you should be gratefully delighted to have her in you life?

To prove to her you are not a wimp, you do what she says or feel bad when you don't do it, which further proves you are a bigger wimp.

Listen to what Onegai is telling you.

For me, l think you just a sucker for love.

If you marry her, you do so at your own peril

Kai! Mmadu alaa. Yeah i have heard you guys. Now am more confused.

^^What are you confused about?Calling her to order or dumping her?

When she finished cooking. And after we ve had our lunch , i raised the issue of the sms ,the summary of her points is that she cannot date a man,who will not at least be giving her money for her hair,soap and cream. .she made her hair with #2000 and till i give her the money ,nothing for me. She said that she felt that i think she is cheap because she fell to easy for me. That now it will no longer be so. That instead of her dating me without me spending on her ,she would rather stay on her own and face her work. That a man will not date her and sleep with her for free.

IZUKWU: When she finished cooking. And after we ve had our lunch , i raised the issue of the sms ,the summary of her points is that she cannot date a man,who will not at least be giving her money for her hair,soap and cream. .she made her hair with #2000 and till i give her the money ,nothing for me. She said that she felt that i think she is cheap because she fell to easy for me. That now it will no longer be so. That instead of her dating me without me spending on her ,she would rather stay on her own and face her work. That a man will not date her and sleep with her for free.

WTF!!! Izukwu please dump her [b]a[/b]ss! Not just because of her st[b]u[/b]pid and senseless comments but because this is not time for you to be spending ur hard earned money on a woman. You are barely making it on your own and her issues are just more stress for you. Can't you forget her and focus on ur life and future? As she's already having issues with you about money this is the temptation that will drive her into the arms of her ex.
I told you to give her the benefit of the doubt last time when she openly confessed everything regarding her life and ex but this is getting too much. This is strike 2, I wonder what the next one will be.

She's probably suffered damage at the hands of the same ex, and you're reaping the rewards of his wickedness. I've been in her position, where I swore the next guy who as much as misstepped or mislooked while dating me will spend till I get me a really nice toy I want (at about N200,000, not a phone). Well, talk to her, tell her you'd like to stay, but she can't do this, and if she feels like this, no need to force the matter, you wish her all the best. And calmly let her go. Anyone that makes you feel insecure isn't what you want, love is abt finding somewhere safe from the world.
BTW: this is reason #23,412,809 why you shouldn't have pre-marital sex. So you can keep your money and she keeps her body. Una go happy.

@Izu,Is your girlfriend a lovepeddler?Why must she exchange her body for money?If she craves paid se.x,why can't she head for a brothel, instead of you lavishing and squandering your hard earned money on an highly demanding and extravagant girlfriend?

IZUKWU: "Baby,should i recieve money from another person to make my hair ? Because tomorrow is sunday and i can't carry my hair like this" i recieve this text message from my gf this afternoon . She loosed her hair on tuesday and has been asking for #2,500 to do a new one and my pockets are empty and i have explained that and asked her to wait till next week . Meanwhile we have agreed that she will spend the weekend in my house and this morning she called me to come to her house and when i came ,it was just to drop her at her shop ,which i did but she was dropping hints that she may not come this evening again as her aunty wants her to come visiting. I kept silent and now she sent this text . What does she mean. Does she just want to punish me or what. And she has done similar things before like not willing to see me when am not willing or capable of meeting her needs. Its is begining to make me feel insecure . She is a fine woman and am sure must have other toasters who will be financially more viable than me and i will not be interested in competing with any for her love. I will just make myself unavailable.

M very sorry to say this mr OP... But ure being used. Lol, shez fyn n knws it. She has other option n ashe knows.

Every1 keeps shoutn what is 2.5K here.
Yhs, what is 2.5k dat she can't ask her pa or ma for? She has to depend on her boify. Smh.. Sum gurls ehn.
No drive to even work for little change. So, if she wnts to buy undies too, she ll have to call on yuh bro?

yinkaGreen:


M very sorry to say this mr OP... But ure being used. Lol, shez fyn n knws it. She has other option n ashe knows.

Every1 keeps shoutn what is 2.5K here.
Yhs, what is 2.5k dat she can't ask her pa or ma for? She has to depend on her boify. Smh.. Sum gurls ehn.
No drive to even work for little change. So, if she wnts to buy undies too, she ll have to call on yuh bro?

Hi, b.

bittyend:

Hi, b.

Halos!

yinkaGreen:
Halos!

I miss you!

Guy u really need somebody to take care of ur babe....i can do dat for u...no worries its free of charge..just give me her phone number

bittyend:

I miss you!

I miss me too.

Love , does it really exist ? Must it be sustained by money? Why does love have to hurt and pain ? Why why why why

She will get money from her sugar Daddy

IZUKWU: Love , does it really exist ? Must it be sustained by money? Why does love have to hurt and pain ? Why why why why

actually Love (if you believe in anything like it) does not hurt. It is the people who are in it that hurt the other party