O boy u take style talk tru sha,in 'IMO'state u gat 2 include a pack of inner wear's 4 ur mother inlaw,hahaha....but if d babe is worth d price,then do it remember its just once 4 life no renewal.

[quote
author=obongproff]I was wondering... were our fore-fathers "forced" or
coaxed to pay such gigantic, extravagant, "community-service-size" of
bride price that guys are forced to pay these days? Were they asked to
bring like a 100 or 300 tubers of yam or more? Did they have to buy
things like they were feeding a village or some form of community
service or philanthropic donation? Did they have to pay for a reception
hall? Did they have to spend up to half a million(in their own currency
as at then) or more becos they wanted to get married? Were they usually
given a long list which usually included kinsmen that the girl's parents
don't even have an acquaintance with? And if they eventually brought
all these(without having to borrow), what did they have left to feed
their new family?

Looking at today's wedding running costs, it's not just making any
economic sense. What is the rationale behind spending over half a
million on a two days event, that definitely won't bring back any
financial dividends? Can't a dude get married with a maximum of 300,000
naira in this country, I mean including the total cost of traditional,
court and white wedding?

Am very sure that in the developed world, wedding is not that expensive?
Or is it because of our under-developed or poverty-inclined thinking?
Isn't it time we questioned this pocket-sucking-dumb-tradition of ours?

I go to church and the pastors do encourage the youths to marry early,
especially in order to avoid fornication. But the so-called tradition is
not encouraging us to do so. An average guy has to save and eventually
waste over half a million in order to have a "standard" wedding. I mean,
what is even the definition of a "standard" wedding in the Nigerian
context? Can't a man have a sub-standard wedding, depending on his
pocket size? What happened to the old saying "Cut your coat according to
your cloth", or is it not applicable to this case? Isn't it high-time
this tradition of spending too much on wedding be reviewed and updated?
Or is it a indirect means of encouraging late marriages?

Sorry I had to pop out many questions, but these have been my thoughts
lately? And I would really appreciate some meaningful contribution to
this, cos this thing is quite annoying? [/quote]

It is not about amount but value.

Spirit of Okija: These muthafuckers are broke ass Mofos..

NO TRADITION HAS A BRIDE PRICE THAT REACHES 200,000 Naira...

Whats expensive are the things you have to buy for the ceremony like Yams and wrappers..

And yes, Bride Price has always been expensive.. Even Jacob for bible had to gba Nwaboy (do houseboy) for 14years to get babe..

no comment. I'm pretty sure you are from mbaise

My friend's wedding the bride price was over N300K, everything he spent was more than N2M. If it costs you N500K, you should count yourself lucky.

Another tribal thread , just to attack the God's nation ( Igbo). Why always the Igbos. I have one question to ask : does it mean that the poor one in the east don't get married. Am aware that the okada riders, bricklayers, painters, carpenters , infact low income earners are married ; so how come, where did they get the money?. when you visit your inlaws and pose as if you have millions, then expect a long list from them.

Lordave: I was there when my dad droped £15k as ma mum's bride price. Dat was B4 the war.

lol... And you'll clock 20 this year

claremont: This is one aspect of our culture that has to be looked at critically. What most people do not understand is that the culture of 'bride price' not only cheapens the Nigerian female, but it also invariably means that the Nigerian female is a commodity (not much different from any grocery item) that can be bought and sold at a price. The good news is that most educated families in Nigeria no longer practise such culture, it seems to be limited to the illiterates and bare-lettered sections of our society.

No decieve yourself.

To my own concern bride payment depend on tribe Out of 3 tribe we have in nigeria
Igbos are paying high price bride.
Yorobos paying bride with understanding btw the wife and husband
Hausa paying bride with a little change .

I no blame this guy, its just the mentality of the illitrates we have in nigeria. And they are many, nearly 91%. They are not selling their daughters as commodities, they are simply showing off to families and friends. I watched this same topic about nigerian marriages on BBC last week where they showed a girls wedding in lag with almost 5000 guests and people were boasting that this was the weeding of the century. The english journalist was so diassapointed and disgusted in the african culture .he didn't even understand why that much amount of persons would come for a wedding they in which they knew little or nothing about the main people getting married.

Mynd_44: Great. Another guy complaining about how "expensive" women are. If you think you can't afford women, TRY MEN

so u mean u gay dudes are more expensive?

Bride price payment depends on the family of the girl and not on tribe.yeah it is mandatory to settle the tribesmen in igbo land during payment, after that most nice families would tell the groom not to give them anything but to use the money to take care of their daughter.my dad did it for my sister's husband and at the end of the day,the dude spent less than 70k on bride price.I think that is what most parents now do and that is why okada riders,bricklayers and other not well to do men can afford to marry today.......it all depends on how nice the bride's family is and how well loved the groom is.

Pls poster you are a broke ass. If you don't have money to get married remain single. Nobody is forcing or dragging you to bring those things. Besdies not all community charge as much as you're exaggerating.

[color=#006600][/color]

atuboweke: Another tribal thread , just to attack the God's nation ( Igbo). Why always the Igbos. I have one question to ask : does it mean that the poor one in the east don't get married. Am aware that the okada riders, bricklayers, painters, carpenters , infact low income earners are married ; so how come, where did they get the money?. when you visit your inlaws and pose as if you have millions, then expect a long list from them.

thank you for this statement. People like sensational stories. Don't be surprised that the nonentities saying all these negative things have never gone for any trad marriage.

It might sound funny but this post makes a whole lot of sense. For those who are not yet married..smile one day you definitely face it.
By the time i sat to check all i spent over 500k. It is barbaric and inhuman to do such a thing. My father saw the list they gave me and was shocked. There should be a kind of re-orientation of our people especially those who think their female children are super markets that must bring bring returns. God help us.

I have two blackberries and two pounds of yams for the best groom!

I am looking to expand my harem.

[color=#006600][/color]

claremont: This is one aspect of our culture that has to be looked at critically. What most people do not understand is that the culture of 'bride price' not only cheapens the Nigerian female, but it also invariably means that the Nigerian female is a commodity (not much different from any grocery item) that can be bought and sold at a price. The good news is that most educated families in Nigeria no longer practise such culture, it seems to be limited to the illiterates and bare-lettered sections of our society.

broke ass!!! Tradition is tradtion educated or not. Bride price does not cost more than 200k. Its when you want to add other things that are not necessary that it becomes expensive.

@op, it is obvious u ar plannin to get married in d nearest future.........but seriously these high cost of bribe price/dowry is common is in the eastern part. unlike where i come from, bride price/dowry is jst 25naira. The simple solution is, if ur pocket is not gallant, jst luk else where.

Can someone check the dictionary meaning of dowry 4 me pls..........jst curious

Okay...three blackberries and four pounds of yams!

Marriage and bride price payment its just like competition in eastern state. If their daughter
Wanted to marry they like to marry someone in ogbodo oyinbo
Or business man that have money and investment.

-565

*[6Y

@ POSTER:the question i will ask is:did our fore-fathers receive fat salaries as we do now or did they make so much money?
u want to marry a woman to take responsibility on her and start raising a family that u are supose to take care of yet u cant raise 150/200k for bride price.i dont see anyfing wrong with the practice.if u cant save money to get the stuffs then u cant take care of another man's daughter for life.
also if u can marry a woman for free then u can change them as u change ur boxers

i asked myself the same question when i wanted to marry(2yrs ago).but when i calculated the cost of what to get,it wasnt up to 100k.i still frowned @ it,but the answer that came to my mind was "if my daughter wants to get married,will i be pleased that she get married in silence?"
what i will implore us is that this is our culture,our heritage.that it is not practiced in europe doesnt make it wrong.is the items that u bring that will feed the bride's family for life?

sosoluv:
U r the juvinile one here. Its either u jus agree wit ur partner to have a court wedding if u clearly can't meet her parent's expectations or u jus leave her alone cos u simply don't have the financial means. I don't understand men who go crying abt spending on traditional weddings and white weddings...if u can't afford u leave it alone. Let those who can afford marry those women and stop being a baby abt it. Who told u that that extravagant woman is the only one left on earth that is capable of loving a man?

imagine how yu re showing off yur naivety in de public

- How can u take someone`s child to de court without bride price?
- Do u think bride price is same as traditional wedding?
C'mon, young lady ask ur parents how things are being done , Bride Price is de basic thing, de bible recognises it.
den Trad, court and white wedding is anoda part dat u will do as much as u wish.

if u aint informed, u re deformed.....ask if u dont know

Marriage is expensive in Naija so that when you marry woman, before you divorce am u go think twice about all the money wey u don trowey!

Lordave: I was there when my dad droped £15k as ma mum's bride price. Dat was B4 the war.

was that a POSTPAID or PREPAID marriage?

funshybam:
was that a POSTPAID or PREPAID marriage?

CHINEKE... una go kill person for this NL...