Greetings Nairaland,

My name is Jerrod. I am an African American male in his mid-thirites who believes he may have met "the one" or his future wife. She is Nigerian(Yoruba). She is a beautiful, wonderful, and intelligent woman. Everything about her is amazing. My only concern is culture. I am almost sure what I am about to say is somewhat cliche, but I am truely curious about what to do in regards to her mom and dad and other siblings(3 sisters and 1 brother). I am a fast learner and just looking for some guidance. What should I do when first meeting them? What should I bring her parents? How do I engage and impress her parents? I just need some starting points and I think I can go from there. Thank you all very much in advance for your time and comments.

Respectfully,

Jerrod

You have to realise that to the yorubas, respect is everything, so you might want to ease up on the way you talk and act. Apart from that, just be yourself and you would be cool. They know you ain't nigerian and so, they would not be expecting much from you in the culture aspect but the respect part is important.
You don't have to buy anything really since this is a first time you are meeting them as this is almost calling them beggars.
You will be fine as long as you follow this

190, whts ur problem. This guy gave a very good write up to a needy man and u are insulting him. If u knw u dont have something to say go and sleep

Jerrod, Mynd said it in a nutshell.

Respect, respect, respect.
Little eye contact with dad.... seen as being disrespectful.
Use of "sir"... pretty much a punctuation mark in every conversation.

Get a summary of their educational achievements.....
Try to similar in your summise regarding self or family.

Nija parents like too much "book"...... educational degrees.
Of course, you have to be able to provide n look after their daughter...
Like a princess.....

Not to worry, you're all good.

Methinks.

One of the easiest "I'm just meeting you for the first time" gift is a bottle of wine. Unless they are ultra-fundamentalist christians or muslims they won't reject it. You could also ask your girl what her siblings like and bring little gifts for them. Believe me it doesn't show them up but kinda says you will be a worthwhile family member if you are given the chance.

And as they are Yoruba they are big on respect and manners so take your A-game in that respect. Don't talk too much and don't crack any expensive jokes.

^^You beat me to it. I was gonna say the same about the wine.

Play it by ear, take it for a test run, see if it can work out, is what i always say.


Yoruba women typically do not date non-yorubas and AAs that much and i think they might or might not find it a bit hard adaptig to the different culture.

So, i'd tell both of you to see how it goes.

It might work out-who can tell, really.

As per what to give her parents- she should let you know what to bring.

Tpia,

I think it's incorrect to state that yoruba chicks don't date outside of their ethnicity.

I would have thought otherwise.

* methinks*

.

Tedpgrass: Tpia,

I think it's incorrect to state that yoruba chicks don't date outside of their ethnicity.

I would have thought otherwise.

* methinks*

.

It is wrong in my opinion. They are actually opened to dating outside their ethnic group

Some do, and with the shortage of available nigerian/yoruba men, more yoruba women are willing to experiment and date outside their ethnic group, but i dont know if the adjustment is that easy.

Easy or not, there was one

It must be the Yoruba girls from the village cos many Yoruba girls over here are dating Nigerian men that arent Yoruba and their parents are all for it.

yes, its the ones from the village.

Mynd_44: Easy or not, there was one

still wary to tread.

tpia1:



still wary to tread.

That's your personal thing dude. You don't have to be scaring the OP

Not trying to scare him, just giving my opinion.

AA_Baltimore_1: Greetings Nairaland,

My name is Jerrod. I am an African American male in his mid-thirites who believes he may have met "the one" or his future wife. She is Nigerian(Yoruba). She is a beautiful, wonderful, and intelligent woman. Everything about her is amazing. My only concern is culture. I am almost sure what I am about to say is somewhat cliche, but I am truely curious about what to do in regards to her mom and dad and other siblings(3 sisters and 1 brother). I am a fast learner and just looking for some guidance. What should I do when first meeting them? What should I bring her parents? How do I engage and impress her parents? I just need some starting points and I think I can go from there. Thank you all very much in advance for your time and comments.

Respectfully,

Jerrod

It is good that you came to the forum to seek answers to your questions...however you have to understand not everybody share your viewpoints and may pffer suggestions/advices that are opposed to what you are looking for.

The best person to ask about your situation is the very chick that you think "are the one". She knows her parents better than anyone and should be the one prepping you. I think someone already said ask your girl.

I would suggest before meeting the parents is to make sure that you and the girl is on one accord and solid. Most parents know when something isn't solid and will try to dissuade the situation because they do not want their children hurt or in an unstable relationship. I am not saying you guys are unstable.....but it seems though you guys lack essential communication.....learning and knowing each other.

i speak from experience and when I knew my husband....i knew his parents and I was on point when I met his parents. Everything was good and still are.

Once you know her...you know her parents.

Good luck.