₦airaland Forum

BREAKING NEWS!!!

Following the assets declaration by President Buhari, I hereby declare my assets:

1. One hot drink
2. Six toothbrushes
3. One fowl (missing)
4. Two boxers
5. One tuber of yam
6. Three tyres
7. Four slippers and other otormorkpor items.

Members of the public can get a copy from the Code of Conduct Bureau.

U start well, but u don't belief? Maybe when you fall viCtim you will beleif

shortgun:
No bank will try that rubbish with me!
Go to the bank and ask for a refund.... If they refuse, Sue them....... They can't just do transactions on your account without your consent.
Don't you get notifications about transactions on your account?
Don't they they clearance from you before transferring funds from your account?

[b]I don't believe your story

If I did not give him option, maybe he will see me as enemy progre

eme1n:
U be badt guy.. lwkmd

A guy came 2show me his WAEC RESULT. He gat 4 Es, 2 Ds and 2 Fs. He asked which school can he go to with dat result and i said SUNDAY SCHOOL.

osemoses1234:
Guy dem don maga yu oooooo ote must fall for guy man 2 chop.....

Tor. Maybe na cry remain

muhyeenisce:
This one no be 419 na 5,2,10

The tin get as e be oooo

BE VIGILANT....This is REAL (I promise you)!!

Please read this carefully, it may save you a few hundred, or a few thousand, or may be a few million bucks. It's a personal experience, a true event that happened this afternoon. I am Sunday Adewole, I just fell victim of fraudsters a few hours ago. I am an account holder with StanbicIBTC bank, I am trying to put fund together to pay for my daughter's tuition fee in CU in which case the institution already resumed last week. Yesterday afternoon, I got a call from somebody purportedly from StanbicIBTC who said "Am I speaking with Dr. Adewole" (called out my other names) to which I answered in the affirmative. He said he called in respect of my BVN which I was observed not to have done, I replied that I already had it done with Skye bank and he said the bank will send me a link so that my account with Stanbic will be linked with the BVN. True to our conversation, I receive a message from StanbicIBTC in which an OTP was sent to my phone. A few minutes later, he called to ask if I got the the SMS, I told him yes but I can't do anything about it cos I was driving. He said no problem I should call out the numbers which I did and he thanked me for my cooperation in a customer service manner. I heard nothing since then till this afternoon at precisely 13:00 hrs when I received a SMS from StanbicIBTC informing me of a debit transaction which cleared my account to the lowest thousand, i.e. I was left with a paltry N685 (six hundred and eighty five naira). I called my account officer who confirmed to me that I have fallen victim of fraudsters and he checked up on my account and saw that the recipient acct is in First Bank. My puzzle is how did they get my account details? How were they able to generate an OTP to my phone. I am waiting to see what my bank would do on it. In the mean time, please be aware of what the 419 people can do. I'll keep you posted on any new development.

This is a pastor in my church and also a Doctor!

WHO IS A REAL MAN?
* A real man is not a person who can
impregnate a woman; any idiot can also
impregnate a woman. Even a 17 year old boy
can impregnate a woman but that does not
make him a man.
* A real man is not a person who is good in
bed. Any idiot can be good in bed.
* A real man is not a person who beats his
wife/girlfriend. Infact it is only idiots that
beat their women.
** A real man is a person who tolerates his
woman
** A real man is a person who controls his
anger
** A real man is the person who shows real
care and love to his woman
** A real man is the person who knows how
to solve the crises and problems in his
relationship
** A real man does not beat his woman
** A real man is hardworking. He is not lazy
**A real man can endure, persevere and be
patient
** A real man can overlook the bad
behaviours of his woman
** A real man corrects his woman with love.
** Real men make their women happy.
Therefore, ladies, when choosing a man, date
real men only.
Marry real men only. If you are not happy in
your relationship now, that means your guy
is not a real man.
Look beyond sex and money and go for
happiness and peace of mind.
Do_You_Agree With My Opinion

FIVE FACTS ABOUT LIFE.
1) No matter how beautiful/ handsome you
are, just
remember that baboons and gorillas also
attract tourists.
2) No matter how big and strong you are,
you
shall not carry yourself to the grave.
3) No matter how tall you are, you can
never
see
tomorrow.
4) No matter how light skinned you are, you
always need a light in the dark.
5) No matter how rich and how many cars
you
have, you will always walk to the toilet. ....
SO TAKE EVERYTHING EASY IN LIFE.
Learn to treat people right, young and old, male
and female.
Nobody owns the world.

And how many have you done secretely? Seeing fake people all around

Flashh:
Doing good and broadcasting it, God don't give reward for that.

Only hypocrites does that.

The Story of Psalm 23

We do not know when David wrote Psalm 23. Perhaps it was when his son Absalom tried to become king. David ran away. He went down to the River Jordan. He crossed it by the ford that we call Jabbok. He went on into a land that we call Gilead. There he met Barzillai. Barzillai was a shepherd. He kept sheep. Sheep are animals about 1 metre high. They give wool for making clothes, milk and meat for food. Barzillai gave David food and shelter. Shelter means a place to hide from the weather. All this made David think. God was like a shepherd. God was like a guide. God was a good friend. David put these ideas into Psalm 23. Many people know this psalm better than they know than any other psalm. It has given help to millions of people. This is because Jesus said that he was the shepherd in the psalm. If we believe in Jesus, we become one of his sheep. We can say, “The LORD is MY shepherd.”

The most painful thing is kp remain and we remain the highest cult producing institution....... Thank God we left there succesfully. 2013 despite police/student clash that I almost lost my life on the process. Tell them kill any cult member on sight so that innocent soul won't be found wanted

Maybe Ogun. And sango in cojunction with awon oosa

ogunwalea:
I didn't see it that way. You don't even know if I'm a Christian or not. I couldn't get enough words to qualify him. The verse best describes him. And BTW what other religion will support the errant nonsense he's saying? Pls bro, don't be like him....

Your type are the. One's that make other Religion to abuse christianity.... Must you quote bible one any things that happened? So if what fayose said now is in accordance islmaic or traditional belief and fact, and they quote their verses to suport him. U will be cursing them abbi? Hatred and deciet of 21st century. Fake people

ogunwalea:
Hmmmm..... This man......

Proverbs 18:6 KJV
A fool's lips enter into contention, and his mouth calleth for strokes.

Don't worry. Your case is in the hand of the late ooni and abobaku.

nwaanambra1:
many rushed to the thread to insult igbos - only to see that its yoloba - sorry Yoruba movie and they skunked back in shame with their tail between their legs

this thread no go pass 5 pages!

but if na igbos committed the crime, the thread for don dey pursue 25 pages by now!
















































































































































































































NAIRALAND YORUBAS CAN TURN A NATIONALIST INTO A HARDCORE TRIBALIST - I noticed am beginning to catch the 'tribalist' virus - and i hate it so much but i cant help it. DEVIL PUNISH IYANGBALI AND THE REST OF HER CREW!

So na 2wifes our oba get?

Guess that will be better

bigneorapz:
hope they won't include this in the new edition history text book? lol

Space booker, how market today ooooo?

dunsman:
.

Ooni Sijuwade Olubuse II: (1930-2015)

Leadership Editors— Aug 14, 2015 3:04

The announcement by the Ife Traditional Council of the transition to the ancestral realm of His Royal Majesty, Oba Okunade Sijuwade Olubuse II marked the end of a remarkable reign in Ile-Ife, the home of the progenitor of the Yoruba race, Oduduwa. Born in Ile-Ife on New Year’s Day in 1930 to Prince Adereti and Madam Emilia Ifaseesin Sijuwade, Okunade was to become the 50th Ooni of Ife, the Custodian of the Source of Yoruba culture and heritage, and an accomplished businessman. The foundation for the remarkable life he lived was laid at both Abeokuta Grammar School and Oduduwa College, Ile-Ife where he had his secondary education before joining, first his father’s cocoa produce business, and later the Nigerian Tribune where he worked for two years. He then enrolled to read Business Management at the Northampton College in the United Kingdom. From there his fortune continued to soar as he joined the conglomerate, AG Leventis and became the first Nigerian Manager at Leventis Motors, Ibadan, at the age of 30.

His grandfather, Ooni Adenekan Olubuse I reigned as the 47th Ooni between 1894 and 1910, followed by Ooni Ademiluyi and Ooni Sir Adesoji Aderemi respectively. By the time Okunade Sijuwade ascended the throne in 1980 he had become a successful business mogul, fashion pacesetter and socialite extraordinaire. One of the greatest legacies he left behind was his pan-Nigerian outlook which made him build bridges across ethnic waters. The friendship that existed between him and the late Emir Ado Bayero of Kano and the Obi Ofala Okagbue of Onitsha was legendary. He was the number one ambassador of Yoruba culture, reviving dormant cultural links between Yoruba at home and those in the Diaspora. No wonder he exuded unforced regal charm, charisma, and even imperial opulence. He relished and protected the mystique surrounding his position as ‘Arole Oodua’. Whereas he was a widely travelled man with business interests across the continents, he was in reality a generous traditional man who was desirous of flaunting the richness of his people’s culture and protecting its uniqueness in the maelstrom of Western influence. He was a man of class who changed the face of the traditional institution forever, for he impacted society like a gale.

He was not a perfect man, as the unfortunate Modakeke crisis showed, but his brilliance was also not to be denied, as could be seen from the resort to a negotiated settlement which brought the fratricidal war to an end. Also his equivocation during the June 12 democratic struggle alienated him from some of his people. But on balance it is generally conceded that he added panache to the ancient throne of Ile-Ife with a glamorous style unique to him and second to none. He also contributed immensely to achieving peace in the nation. He will be sorely missed. May his soul rest in peace. Kabiyesi, sun re o!

How many pilot do they have in the helicopter sir? Now, I can count about 3pilots missing and one confirmed dead. Anyway RIP to the dead one's

God will make us found him alive and the d second dude too

U be wincch?

dapyd1:
The only explanation I have is; African airforce must be involved.
You did not find another place to abuse your uniform but where many other SENIOR police Officers are and your PROMOTION exercise is going on.




That boy you harassed last ehn, at the checkpoint, his Dad is a Babalawo.

Hahahhahaaahahah.... My first experience. Till I mastered it

sanomi001:
Guy hw fa u dey lie na only u dey smoke weed me 2 no dey tak weed. Weed na lik pounded yam oooo I even dey dope 4 hand now

I will get ya a handkachief

Beautiful letter written by a father to his son !!!
Please read till end . It is worth it. You may consider sharing with your children
The writer is a renowned Hong Kong TV broadcaster & Child Psychologist.
The words are relevant to all of us.
Young, old, children or parents! Parents can use the letter in their teachings to their children.
Dear son.
I am writing this to you for 3 reasons:
1. Life, fortune and mishaps are unpredictable, nobody knows how long he lives. Some words are better said early.
2. I am your father, and if I don't tell you these, no one else will.
3. What is written is my own personal bitter experiences that perhaps could save you a lot of unnecessary heartaches. Remember the following as you go through life:
1. Do not bear grudge towards those who are not good to you. No one has responsibility of treating you well, except your mum & I.
To those who are good to you treasure them & be thankful. ALSO you must be cautious. Everyone has a motive for every move. When a person is good to you, it does not mean he really likes you. Be careful, do not hastily regard the person as a real friend.
2. No one & nothing is indispensable.
Once you understand this idea, it would be easier for you to go through life when people around you do not want you anymore, or when you lose what/who you love most.
3. Life is short.
When you waste your life today, tomorrow you would find that life is leaving you. The earlier you treasure your life, the better you enjoy life.
4.Love is a transient feeling. It fades with time & with mood. If your so called loved one leaves you, be patient. Time will wash away your aches & sadness.
Do not exaggerate beauty & sweetness of love, and do not exaggerate sadness of falling out of love.
5. A lot of successful people did not receive a good education, that does not mean that you can be successful by not studying hard! Whatever knowledge you gain is your weapon in life.
One can go from rags to riches, but one has to start from some rags!
6. I do not expect you to financially support me when I am old. Neither would I financially support your whole life. My responsibility as a supporter ends when you are grown up. After that, you decide whether you want to travel in a public transport or in your limousine, whether rich or poor.
7. You must honour your words, but do not expect others to honour theirs. You can be good to people, but do not expect people to be good to you.
If you do not understand this, you would end up with unnecessary troubles.
8. No matter how much time I have with you, let us treasure the time we have together. We do not know if we would meet again in our next life..

Two men met @ a bus stop
and struck up a
conversation. One of them
kept complaining of family
problems. Oh! I'm in soup, my
fiancée is showing interest in my father, I feel like
committing suicide! Finally the other man
said: "
You think you have family
problems? Listen to my
situation. " A few years ago I met a young widow with a
grown up daughter. We got married and I
got myself a
stepdaughter. Later, my
father married my step-
daughter. That made my step-daughter my mother
and my father became my step-son. He
continued: Also my wife
became mother-in-law of
her father-in-law. Much
later, the daughter of my wife, my step- mother, had
a son. This boy was my half brother
because he was my
father's son. But he was also
the son of my wife's
daughter, which made him my wife's grandson. That
made me the grandfather of my half
brother. This was nothing until my
wife and I had a son. Now
the half sister of my son,
my step - mother, is also his grandmother This makes my
father the brother-in-law of my child
whose step - sister
is my father's wife. I am my
step - mother's brother - in
-law, my wife is her own child's aunt, my son is my
father's nephew and I am my OWN
GRAND FATHER!!!!! And you
think you have FAMILY
PROBLEMS!!!!!

Counting on numbers of coment

MY FUNNIEST DAY EVER
PREFACE : Please, Take your time to read this my funny article cause it is one of my experience in school back then at lagos state Polythenic, i can't wait to share it with you, it is so so funny. Please, sit, relax, read and enjoy.
MY FUNNIEST DAY EVER
There was this girl in my location that i wanted to date, we were very close but just as a friend even though i have interest in her and have tried so many times to win her heart. We are fond of each other and she can't stop abusing me that am not a good cook.
This faithful day, after she has lnvited me to her place like always, i went to her place, she was not at home. I called her on phone, she told me where her key is, that I should wait for her inside.
I did as I was told, i went inside her room, after some time alone going through her stuff, stuff that have seen and check so many times, I got tired and lonely.
I decided to surprise her by cooking a sweet meal for her before she come back, with that I will pass my time, probably with that intention I will win her heart, after all, she said am not a good cook which am confident I am.
After so many stress with the cooking, the food was ready, a nice local meal, Amala with Ewedu (chocorus spp), Stew and a nice fresh fish was ready waiting for her. I was happy with the job done. With confident, I assured myself that have already won her battle.
She came back on time with her friends (two girls & four boys), seeing this, extra Amala was prepared so that the food can go round.
Everybody ate to their satisfaction & were praising me for the delicious meal and i was happy & proud cause it seem am already winning this girl.
As they were thanking me, an argument arise, they were arguing how delicious is man food compare to woman food, she ask me how did i prepare the found? everybody was silent to listen to the master cook (me of cause).
I started telling them with pride but when i mention that i took that paint plastic (local name : ike oda) to blend the pepper. She was shocked, she screemed!!! And shouted that, that was the paint plastic she is using as toilet plastic (I mean toilet po)
All eyes was raised, everybody in the room were trying to force vomit' but all effort fail cause the food had already reach its destination, a lot of voices was raised, with commotion but that's not all.
After so many display, they all settle down and ask me to continue, after picking up a little courage, I do.
She ask me how did i get the broom i used for the ewedu (chocorus spp), I answer by pointing to the direction in her room where a broom is visible to everybody.
She exclaim again with a louder voice that it was the broom she always use for washing her toilet floor, toiletries and her plastic paint ( toilet po), everybody started shouting with anger, sweating vigorously and making effort to vomit the food they have eaten.
As if that was not enough, when I was given the chance to continue again and I mention the sponge i use to wash the plates,
She was like did I get it from her house mate?
I said no that i used the one's in her room over there. She look at me with a surprise eyes and with immediate effect, she exclaim, immediately join the others in the action of forcing a regurgitation.
To force herself to vomit, she announces that it was the sponge she always use to wash and clean her paint plastic (her plastic po) and her toiletries. . . . . . . . .
GUESS WHAT? I FAINTED!!!
.............THE END.....................

I will rather go and learn how to they farm weed for owo in ondo state....... Cause am tired of schooling in nigeria. And I need money

People like us can't complain too much..... Cause I don't vote to anyone. Buhari should stop decieving us he's old and can't be active in office. Mandela is of his age when he becomes president of south africa. And till tomao history won't forget him........
Anyway tell baba am not corrupt!
He. Can make me minister for women affairs

Bros u sure say u know wetin u wan type....

sseunth:
TLTRTLTRTLTR

Taylor86:
h

For huston bolt I guess?