₦airaland Forum

fikayormi:
Fuvk your rev mad mad , then the feelings will die down

Fiscus105:
Text him instead, how much people are telling you, his actions towards you ,(not liking u) and that ur husband has been angry about it.

That's enough signal for him, dnt go to him personally pls.

If you go physically, it may be avenue for two of u to melt finally, you may not able to frown at him to scare him away since you too crushing, if you are smiling wen telling him ur mind, he may use the avenue to twist your brain, allay ur fear, promise you heaven and earth, with twinkle of eye! Pant will drop in ur ass.

Fiscus105:
Uhmmmmmmm.
I biliv ur husband is not an understanding man, and may God help him in journey of marriage, if rev crushing on u and u not crushing on him back viz a viz, it would have easier alot to quench but since two of u crushing, I biliv it will need intervention of God,for things not to happen now or latter, except if rev is transferred or u leave the church for now.

I'm hoping for his transfer, as he's spent 2 years aiidy...
Even before all this happened, I've always told my husband to stop going to this said church(won't mention it's name) and go to another branch nearer to our house but he won't oblige my request, maybe due to his connections there , the positions he holds and the relationship he's built with people over time, even the years he's spent there, so I expect you understand with me when I say he won't leave the church, even though I have to be opened about the situation to him, he may ask me to stop going but he'll keep going, and given that it's a very big church, with me being a member of the choir, people will ask questions, what reasons do we give?
This is really a very sensitive issue, I sincerely don't know how to handle it..
But from the look of things, this man won't make the first move, neither will I, he'll keep doing what he does while I do mine...

With time we both will be fine....



If Adeboye of redeemed could ask his spiritual son to sack a female secretary that his son was crushing on, the son said, he liked to be going early enough on Monday to office mainly to see his secretary that he would not be able to see for weekend, because he had developed interest in her. How much less u that you can't leave temporarily or tell ur husband.

As it stands now, the passion would continuing to be growing if u continue seeing each other until a day one of u will take bold step to make it reality, by then it would be almost a journey of no return.

Kobojunkie:
There are many possible reasons for what is the infatuation you have towards this man, and so you would have to dig deep into your psyche to really understand why your brain emits these "love" chemicals in his case.

Anyways, to train your mind so you can ignore these irrational signals your brain sometimes sends you, you first need to have a base idea of what mental discipline is and what it is not.


Like dieting, the key is practice. Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28 says lust is sin. Using this information, you can train your heart to refuse all lust by focusing on redirecting your thoughts to that which pleases God and away from sin when you sense lust in your heart. This takes consistent practice and continuous submission and obedience of the teachings of Jesus Christ in order to achieve. Once you begin to value God over that sin, you will find, over time, it will become easier to sense the lustful feelings approaching and to deflect from them. Eventually, you will reach a point where the approach of such lust causes you irritation as you find you would rather not offend God with it for any reason.

Fiscus105:
Let me give you undiluted advice, I will advice you either to stop going to that church for now or you change church permanently, or you tell your husband tactically.

From your story , the pastor himself has been consumed by passion of having relationship with you and that's what he has been consistently displaying by single out you alone when greeting, thank God you urself noticed the signal already.

The only saving grace now is that, he is not quite sure if his message/code/seduction
/signal has been decoded by you and if he has been decoded, not too sure if it will be positive, been a pastor, a respected man of God, he wouldn't like to shoot his shot without 100% sure.

If you keep attending the church, a time is coming that the passion would be totally overwhelmed you. I guess you know the consequences.

Fiscus105:
Madam, not that ur rev interested in ur spiritual activities as u ignorantly believe, but wishes to been seeing you regularly because of passion of feelings burning inside him, I will advice you to open to ur husband and let two of you deliberate on it, though you shouldn't tell him you have started liking him o.

If you can change church and u dnt want to open to ur husband, your journey to ride him is 2/3 achieved already

Kobojunkie:
First to realize is that everything you sexually desire someone you are not married to, you commit the sin of adultery against God - Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28 - and this applies whether the individual is right in front of you regularly, occasionally, only occasionally or you don't even have any rapport whatsoever with individual. So those advising you that by avoiding the man you prevent the sin lie to you.

If you indeed want to stop sinning against God, this jn addition to quiting your addiction to the churches of men , their pastors and mogs, you also need to embark on training your mind to obey God as opposed to engaging in sexual lust. Mental maturity aka self-control is the only way to liberate your mental from such sins and the only way is through emotional and mental discpline, which entails training your mind away from the sin and towards obedience.

fimzzy1991:
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Tell your spouse about it. It will die a natural death and get closer to Jesus, accept him in your heart completely

chioma134:
This post was triggered by an earlier post I saw where the poster was having long talks with his friend's wife. I've been in a similar situation. I changed location and had to be separate from my family due to work. I was lonely and needed a friend. I talk with my husband regularly, but his interests are not my interests, so I find that besides household and family matters, we have little else to talk about. I found myself talking to this guy I met when I went for an official assignment. We started as friends, but we became attracted to each other. So when I travelled back to base, we started these long conversations. We're both born-again Christians and both married, so we kept to certain boundaries. I enjoyed conversing with him more than with my spouse. I became consumed with thoughts of him. He also expressed his desire and attraction towards me, but we laughed over it as jokes.

My husband noticed the conversations when I travelled home and became suspicious. He forbade me from speaking with him. He had never seen me have long talks with any friend, talkless of a male one. I informed my friend and he said no problem, he would wait till I travelled back to work base before he would continue. He later travelled to meet his family and conversation became scanty. I realized how much I was addicted to him when I couldn't talk to him as much as I wanted. He returned to base and we continued like before.

I started praying for God to help me overcome these desires. Maybe he also felt the same, because for some reasons I don't know, he reduced the frequency of calls and chats drastically. I didn't try to find out why, just thought the time-off would help me clear out immoral thoughts. But I got hurt when he acted indifferent on one occasion when I felt he should have shown more care. I asked him about it and he pretended not to understand what I was talking about. I read the writing on the wall, and decided to play along. So I said "bye. It was nice meeting you." Part of me was grateful it ended, another part was wishing I could still be with him. I love my husband and children, I cannot come and scatter my home.

He thought I was joking. I was no longer responding to his chats, and when I did, only with monosyllables. He became hurt and accused me of going silent on him. I told him he started it. He wanted me to become defensive, but the Holy Spirit whispered "keep quiet ". So I allowed him rant without saying anything. I thank God I didn't, because I would have exposed how deep my true feelings for him were.

Right now, he chats once in a while, just general "how are you". I say "fine". My feelings have healed and I thank God we didn't continue because I wouldn't have been able to stop myself from an affair if we had eventually had any physical contact. I can categorically say I'm no longer in love with him.

I penned these down for those struggling with similar situations. Just cut off the relationship. Stop conversation, chatting, or physical contact. Then pray for God to help you overcome those lusty feelings.

Spherical77:
Are you CBN governor that you are demanding to credit people's account?

Sent87:
Do you cease to exist when you are asleep?

Nebuchadnezzarr:
Stop being a doubting Thomas. There are so many things the physical eyes cannot see. Even in your own room that you think you are alone, there are spirits around.

You think the world just came into existence like that? The big bang theory??
There are forces, negative supernatural and positive supernatural (good and evil) both powers have enormous energy and control over elements in the universe.

Whiteshield:
May untimely death be the hallmark of your family.

May you never grow old.

May your parents grow bankrupt trying to bury you.

May everything that gives you joy turn to bitterness.

May you always have an invisible smell that makes you repulsive to people.

May shame never leave your life.

May your family members be ashamed to identify with you.

May you be a servant of your younger ones.

You will work like an elephant but still end up begging for food.

Eife:
It could be a close friend, relative or past lover
Humans are wicked, everybody just Dey wait for his or her own transformation
That’s part of life shit

Uprightness100:
Definitely! It will backfire on the EU sanctions and will give Putin and Russia the upper hand. But this is what I see happening in the coming days/ months.

I see a Scenario where Most of EU and others go do Israel's Gas tho not directly from Israel. As of yesterday, I heard Egypt is now going to buy Much of Israel has and would sell to Europe.

I Believe in times to come this will anger Russia/Putin and will make him to make a move towards Israel. Which is the Ezekiel 38& 39 GogMagog War.

I Believe, Israel gas and resources is the Hook GOD ALMIGHTY will use to hook Russia down to Israel. Because what we are witnessing happening to Ukraine is quite similar to what will happen to Israel.

The same manner you the Nations do to Ukraine is the same that will happen to Israel. No one will help Israel. They will be almost annihilated but the GOD of Israel will Come down and Crush all the Collation of Nations.

Blunttruth:
it's the wisest thing to do instead of getting involved in a scandal. If you married your friend, he should know you better and be mature enough to handle it.

Gogiba:
The reverend is hitting on you big time

Ink4Hope:
Good morning Ma'am, I would have loved to give you my advice base on experience but I don't go to church yet this I know


We meet people everyday that we get fond of, It doesn't mean we must see what's between their legs.. If you love your family as much you claim to do, take this as one of those feelings that will always stay hidden

immortalcrown:
To be demisexual or sapiosexual is both good and bad. It is good because it discourages sex with random people. It is bad because not every intelligent close friend will reciprocate the feeling properly and you are not supposed to have sexual intercourse with every intelligent close friend.

But every human has one habit or the other to battle with. May God help you overcome the temptation.

Blunttruth:
Then tell your husband

Gentlerespect76:
Yeah. Talking about it as you are doing is a wise decision as i can see you have conscience. And it's all about commitment to your marriage and a deep conviction that is ever present in mind, that infidelity is a redline you are never crossing.

immortalcrown:
Your two responses give me the impression that you are open-minded. Your responses suggest you sincerely seek advice. I like your manner of approach. I am really sorry for my first two comments about you. Please, forgive me. Now, let me try to advise you.

Avoid intimate conversations with him. By intimate, I do not mean lustful discussions. I mean confidential matters. Curtail your physical interaction with him, especially when there is no third party present, to avoid losing control and kissing him.

If possible, let your discussion with him be in the presence of either his wife or your husband. This can help wither the feeling. Also, do ponder on his faults as a man. Thinking about his imperfection can help suppress the feeling.

One question: Are you demisexual?

Sheddy5:
tell him you want the both of you to keep a distance that will help you focus.. Tell him about your strange feelling and you want to stop it, thats all.

Gentlerespect76:
I understand, it's temptation which is human. But do not give room to it. God is your strength.

Sheddy5:
yes ofcourse.