₦airaland Forum

flokii:
So most Nigerian men in UK are now homeless?.. cos these stories are becoming too frequent.
I watched one clip where an African youtuber was advising women from Africa especially the ones from Nigeria to stop involving UK police in their marital lives.. the Indian women according to the youtuber earn x3 of what our women earn in that same UK but don't call Police to throw their husbands out the way Africans are doing.
Why are you people giving us bad name in the global community?

Those Indians hold on to their religion and culture. They are not using foreign religion to form MoG and fvck married women or form oyinbo.

rajiedreez:
I love Nigeria o, and I want it to work

All claim so but the proof of the pudding is in the eating.

99% of people looting and destroying 9ja will openly say what you just said.

madridguy:
Imagine people like Sabitu Adam will come out tomorrow and start cursing Nigeria forgetting he is also part of the rotten system.

Now, if by tomorrow the FG set up a new verification method, his likes and the useless boss will arrange people to stage a paid protest while the verification process should not commence.

As I used to say, majority of we Nigerians are very corrupt, our cries is just that the national cake has not reached us.

We have countless people like this, all they do everyday is to come online to paint Nigeria black whereas what they are doing contributed to the mess the country is suffering from.

You still pretend not to know what the key issues are.

Why do people hate Nigeria to loot and destroy it so much?

Is Nigeria even a country?

Do people feel any genuine sense of citizenship?

If you gave various regions of Nigeria the opportunity to vote to be independent or stay as one Nigeria, how will they vote?
Do people feel genuinely that 9ja is redeemable (forget political lip service}?

Kinsmen of anybody in Aso Rock at any point in time can claim to love 9ja, but it can't plaster over the key issues.

Truth is you can't force people to love 9ja. From North to South, nobody really does. The elite from all tribes/regions only gather to loot, no love. Even projects are just opportunities to inflate cost and loot.

samuk:
Okay. I wonder how many people in Benin city know that Ogida quarters got it's name because of the king (Ogie) of Idah was imprisoned there briefly after Benin-Idah War of 1516.

How many Benin people know the connection between Eko (camp) of Oshoidin popularly known as Ekosodi, the community by University of Benin and the Oshodi in Lagos.

How many people know the connection between Ugbo (farm) of Owo or Ugbowo and Owo in Ondo state.

Imaguero have a College named after her in Benin City, Imaguero College Benin City.

Benin City is full of history.

Meanwhile I am still searching for evidence of Benin/Ife connection dating back to the period before 1897 when the British destroyed Benin City.

Well, since everything about tradition is erroneously considered paganism these days, most people don't care to know. Moreover, it does not give you money to know. Money now rules.

Some now even greet "La-Jesu" instead of their family greeting.

Ask people the importance of Evbiemwen, Ibiwe, Ogbe-Alaka or those areas and quarters of Benin, they won't know.

It would surprise them that princes of Benin who were not appointed dukes, resided at Evbiemwen those days. The same applied to such princes in Owo, who were settled at Ugboroko/Igboroko quarter.

Princesses of Benin who became widowed and needed succour later in life, also had own quarter.

samuk:
A BRIEF ON THE BENIN-IDAH WAR.
By Dr. Paul Osa Igbineweka

The first Attah of Idah was a Benin Prince who went for hunting expedition and never returned but displaced the existing rulers to become the Attah.

The war between the Attah of Idah and Benin was a war between relatives caused by the then Oliha whose wife that he boasted of her fidelity was seduced by the stage managed cripple Young man by Oba Ẹsigie to prove to Oliha that no one can vouchsafe for a woman fidelity.

At the end Oliha killed the wife Imaguero. To pay back as revenge he sent emissary to the Attah of Idah that Ọba Ẹsigie was waging war against Idah and did same to Oba Ẹsigie by different emissary.

And in addition to that was Chief Oliha's animosity against Ọba Ẹsigie for accepting Christianity from the Portuguese. The Benin-Idah war was where the The Queen mother Idia fought as the first Amazon of the Benin Kingdom.

After the defeat of the Attah, he was captured and brought to the place in Egọ under house arrest, and upon investigation, it was discovered how chief Oliha caused the war.

The place the Attah was kept was named prison of "Ogie Idah" which to date is called Ogida quarters. When the matter was finally resolved, Attah was released to go back to Idah to be reinstated.

In a mood of tolerance the pendant of Queen mother IDIA was presented to the subsequent Attah as a souvenir of unity and good memories of reconciliation.

Nice one. Very consistent.

Furthermore, the Benin-Idah war was well-documented in a letter still in existence. Written in Benin to King of Portugal in 1516.
Benin army used firearms in that war. Oba Esigie had to come up with new military tactics at that time.

Please always CC guys like AutomaticMotors, Gregyboy, etc.

karim1874:
Alexander the Great, a name synonymous with military genius and unparalleled conquest, remains one of history's most iconic figures. Born in the ancient kingdom of Macedonia, his short but eventful life changed the course of history, creating an empire that stretched from Greece to Egypt and as far as India. Let's explore the remarkable journey of Alexander the Great.
find more about in this link
https://www.alalamychronicles.com.ng/2024/06/alexander-great-conqueror-of-ancient.html

People never learn about Queen Idia, Bashorun Gaha or Kanem Borno finish, you dey go Alexander the Great.

For this hunger economy?

Intellectual pursuit without it being a certificate course to find work is rare these days o.

But anyone with proper interest in politics, history and knowledge in general ought to know classical history of Graeco-Roman times. In addition to basic Nigerian/African history.

Keep it up. You may find one or two people interested. You may want to explore specific events in his life. The death of his closest companion Hephaestion in 324BC, for example. Or the siege of Tyre in 332BC.

santaclaws:
Edo state alone produces more palm oil than the entire South East... Y'all need to learn some humility.

AdaPalm is the largest in the south east, with just a palm plantation of 4,310 hectares, Okomu Oil & Presco are both located in Edo state, they're the largest producers so far. Okomu alone has 12,500 hectares of palm plantation...

Some people too beat chest. There is nobody in my village that has no palm plantation of various sizes. Including yours truly. The palm plantation my late uncle set up in 1969/1970 used to have over 100 workers. Around 80 Ghanian workers had to leave during Ghana must go saga. The farm is still ongoing.

Same across the state.

The Ultra Modern Conference hall of NIFOR near Benin is where Gowon govt met to ratify Aburi Conference agreement in 1967. Ojukwu refused to attend because FG/North had tweaked the agreement in the meantime. Some don't even know that NFOR in Benin is head of all oil palm technology/biotech in 9ja.

Ok, 8 years after Ghana started "1 District, 1 Factory (1D1F)". Dem just dey wake up.

Edo custom shares some similarity with Urhobo's. Ordinarily, a father who has not paid dowry on his wife can't receive any dowry on his daughter by that same wife. Simple.

OP, your grandma must have mellowed over the issue by now. Your dad should go pay dowry on your mum promptly first.

Splendicity:
God has shown me immense faithfulness and kindness, and I deeply appreciate His abundant goodness and mercies in my life.

Today is my birthday—come celebrate with me!"

Glendy Properties
Glory Chinwendu

Happy birthday dear.

Splendicity:
There is a mountain opposite the Ikare Akoko Nysc orientation camp, Ondo State .

A lot has been said concerning the mountain ,some call it a prayer mountain; some call it omiato , Moses Orimolade Mountain and many other names.

I have already started asking around; I will surely give you the full gist when I am done.

Ikare, Idanre and indeed Ondo in general has so much natural wonders. All I see is young people writing and talking about these phenomena on social media/YouTube, Insta, Fb, NL, etc. Out of passion and for free.

It begs the question what politicians/MDAs are doing to popularise these natural assets. Same thing throughout 9ja.

OP, don't mind that person writing nonsense. Please continue the good work you have started.

Exceptional300:
There’s this girl I have been dating for a couple of months now, we are planning on settling down soon. She was diagnosed with PCOS couple of years ago before I met her, had a surgery and one of her ovaries were removed. Though she still ovulates and sees her period, I am kind of worried if there will be any issues in the future.
My parents doesn’t know about her surgery yet. Should I tell them about it?

People will call you immature, mummy's pet and what not. Nor mind them. Only you will face any fertility issues should they occur. None of the most Naira land ladies here will be there with you. In fact, the will be the ones to also blame you later for not checking well. Or even tell you it is not a must to have kids, that the love you and the lady share is the most important. Love that has no meaning anymore these days.

Reach an agreement with her to get preggy before anything.

With one ovary, assume that fertility is reduced by 50%. Because some women may only have a viable egg from one ovary every month. From 2 ovaries would increase chances that at least one ovary will produce a good egg per cycle/month. 2 ovaries will also increase chances of non-identical twins slightly too. Assuming there are a no other hidden fertility/hormonal issues.

It is not her fault but chances of PCOS affecting the other ovary is increased having had one before. So no delay with having babies if you both are serious.

Also, some ladies can lie for Africa. Ensure that all the problem is solved as she claims. Don't assume it is the whole truth. They can divulge 10% of the truth, so that later you can't accuse them of not telling you before marriage. Check it out with O & G.
Some of us have been there and don't say nobody warned you. I really don't want you to have such a sad experience.

Antoeni:
I advised my neighbor to leave a man that beats and maltreat her always. Just now she posted a picture with the same man with caption "No goat can separate me from my love". I don’t know who she’s referring to anyways. Hope it’s not me shaa

Werey.
Na malu go seperate them then.

ElevationD:
“Oba is royal father to all”.

If someone says I am the royal father, does that not confer the citizens the right to claim that the same Oba is their father?

If the Oba of Benin is not “all Obas”, what then is the difference between him and other Kings, reigning over their own people?

With due respect to the Oba, Mr. Akpata did not by any means infer by his words that the Oba was his biological father. Neither did he in anyway disrespect the King. Such matters should not have gone to the press. The spokesperson from the palace should have called Akpata personally to notify him of an error, if any. He accorded the Oba the dignity and honor due to him. The palace was too quick to denounce him, making it look like something was transpiring politically. Kings are supposed to be impartial in political matters, but as we know in our country, they always have their preferred candidates.

Can we say that Akpata does not know the culture? Certainly someone would guide him or the entourage while visiting the Oba appropriately, telling him the words to say and how to conduct himself before the Oba.

Once I was in the palace of the Oba of Lagos. I had an injury and I was walking with a stick. The palace guards accosted me and asked me if I was a traditional Chief from my area. When I said No, the man insisted that I must not use the walking stick inside the palace, as one without a title. I respected the culture.

I think the Oba’s people over reached themselves. In all, we must not let politics cause so much division among us, no matter where we come from.

I have just said that in my previous post. Everywhere in the world, in royal and aristocratic use, words are chosen carefully. Oba of Benin palace is very different. I know because I am from the same bloodline as 2 first class Obas in SW and I do go to those palaces. There are some things also unique to those palaces that don't quite apply in Benin.

My late father used to accompany our grandfather (a duke) to Oba palace when he was still a kid. They were thoroughly taught how to behave at the palace. At the usual meeting chamber at Ugha Ozolua (Ozolua Court) in the palace where cases/disputes are settled by the Oba, the etiquette is totally different too. I know a lot of Benin people who don't know much about it.

Your dad can even be a chief, but not royalty or a duke and won't still know many things about that palace. There are many things about the palace that even a chief won't know, let alone a lawyer who has probably spent more time in Delta and Lagos in the past 25 years working like Akpata. Chiefs have sections of the palace they belong to (and able to access) and no chief, no matter how high, has access to all parts of the normal palace.

What you forget is that Oba of Benin was a head of state of an empire and structures that evolved over centuries are still there. An example, Benin Empire was the first country in the world to recognise Brazil's independence from Portugal in 1824. Brazilian govt recently confirmed it again. Not USA or Argentina who want to claim it. Upon recommendation of a prominent Benin's Afro-Brazilian subject of Lagos. You heard the uproar when Oba said Lagos used to belong to Benin. Idiots who don't know history were shouting. Lagos could not recognise Brazil without Oba of Benin's permission. They were his subjects until late 1840s. Read about Kosoko, Akintoye and Dosunmu (Decemo).

How many Obas have a history of such international diplomacy? Only Oba of Benin's grandson as Olu of Warri later had such diplomatic ties with Portugal, on behalf of his grandfather initially. Diplomacy comes with etiquette and formality. Even recently before becoming Oba, Oba Ewuare II was a career diplomat/ambassador.

If anyone with Akpata told him about palace rule, he clearly did not follow it.

There are other differences. In Benin you don't have a king every 1 kilometre. There are no kingmakers (only crowners) and Oba owes his title to God and ancestors, right from birth. Not to politicians. Benin has no honorary titles for outsiders. IBB, Obasanjo or any of those people were not given titles, even when IBB requested for it, it was refused. In many places, politicians are "dashed " titles during campaign. Like Tinubu during his campaign. How do you give titles at a time you are supposed to be most neutral as a royal father?

Your fame or money mean nothing at the palace. Your good record and integrity do mean a lot.

If you don't understand Benin culture and history, you don't. It is very intricate. Some Benin people watch all those 3 minutes Instagram videos about Benin and foam in the mouth. Such as about Oba marrying two sisters and calling it a taboo in Benin. I have had to educate them about Benin history and precedents that they never knew, what applies to royalty and what doesn't. But all will claim they know Benin culture (from their commoner position) but never realise what they don't know.

Tribalism has increasingly led to WAZOBIA education in 9ja, at the cost of authentic history. If FESTAC 77 was going to hold in 2024, FG would never choose Idia mask of Benin as the symbol. It won't fit the WAZOBIA narrative of current Nigeria.

AutomaticMotors
Samuk
Gregyboy

ElevationD:
When Akpata said that he was a son of the palace, did he by any way infer that he was a biological son of the king?

All kings refer to their people as sons and daughters. With due respect, the present Oba appears to be mired in a lot of controversies. He words are no longer appearing to be the law, as used to be with his ancestors.

Oba of Benin is not "all Obas". Oba is royal father to all. But you cannot say you are a son of the palace. If you don't understand a culture, ask. If Akpata truly understands the culture, he should know.

If I go to Oba's palace, I can say I am from ancestral palace of my fathers. Once I mention the location, Oba palace officials know where I am from/my family.

Let me give an example. About 12 years back, I travelled thousands of kilometres with family and went to Oba's palace. The kids were so excited and we were taking pictures. Some palace officials came and stopped us. I said I am from so and so place o and the kids are just so excited. One official asked "in that your palace, do people just come and be taking pictures anyhow? I have visited that palace a few times and not seen such". We had even forgotten to ask if pics are allowed. I saw no written warning or probably missed it.

I don't own that palace, but he was asking if in your family palace, if we would allow such. A ducal palace in this case.

I thought it was a bit too high-handed but Boko was newly raging back then. So, I accepted it.

adecz:
The clarification was on point, so that
Akpata doesn't go spreading falsehood
that he is of royal blood and prince of
the legendary kingdom ...

But as usual, the only pastime of 'Obidients'
on social media na to dey insult anyone
that isn't a rabid obedient❗️❗️❗️😐😐😐


Mad people➡️❌❌❌❌

I have generally supported Igbo presidency for the sake of fairness. I always hoped SW/SE/SS can work together to make it happen.
Edo youth wanted it and voted for Obi. But our SE cousins often display too much arrogance towards others. If SE are republican, they should not use it to abuse those with a history of enviable monarchy. Because anybody can be Igwe in SE does not mean it's so everywhere.

Such insult will further alienate those supporting Igbo presidency.

Benin palace has etiquette and Akpata should have known it. Claiming son of the palace implies Oba's candidate/prince. Benin is not SE or any other place with princes all over the place.

APC and PDP candidates are equally sons of the soil just like Olumide. No divisive tribal sentiments needed in the campaign.

Benin does not want the injustice of marginalisation at presidential level to happen in Edo. Governorship should go to Edo central.

But Akpata can contest as it is his democratic right. But no false claims.

vacanci:
Labour is kicking at mere wage award.

They should wait until the minimum wage they are fighting for is passed into law. I have alsways said it that the problem labour have is with the states and not even federal government

they should be ready for all out war with the state governments. Shey it's 20 states now, after min wage, it will rise to 34.

I[b]nstead of starting the battle and shuting down nigeria when subsidy was removed and subsequent floating of exchange rate, they waited for hyper inflation and now asking for what the government is never going to provide.
[/b]
It will be a tough ride for this jokers

If you follow the news well, you will know that labour CANNOT protest about just anything. They were taken to court before. They were asked to focus on their remit: Trade unionism and fighting for the right of workers.

You should be asking Falana and others who protested against GEJ over oil subsidy to go protest. These days, they only sit in their office and do yeye talk on Channels TV.

Mrexcell:
The man is supposed to have consulted the people before he just wrote his illusionary ideas. Why go ahead to take decisions for them without their approval?

This is a democratic era. They can't do it by fiat. Without a proper consultation, even a referendum, na joke dem dey.

aceman88:
Yoruba man and sense.

You proposed that Yoruba speaking part of Kwara and Kogi, and even some part of Delta and Edo state be merged with south west to form Western region.

But in the case of south east, you didn't propose that the Igbo speaking part of Rivers, Delta, Benue, Kogi, Cross River, etc be merged together to form South Eastern region, rather to show your true colour of hatred, you are proposing that the Ohaji/Egbema region, one of the oil producing LGAs in southern imo state be removed from South East to form part of Southern/Niger Delta region. Is it not shameless daylight witchcraft?

The guy nor try for this part. All Yoruba-like people to be home in SW but does not apply to other tribes to have their kilt and kin together in one region. This could scupper the whole thing. This is a golden opportunity to the fair to Igbo people and all who feel marginalised.

SW will gain at least another 2 to 4 million extra population. Others will lose a million or more as they currently are. Not smart.

Leave the regions as they currently are.

Gerrard59:
While I do agree with some aspects of your post, I am curious, in a nutshell, sir, what is the benefit of marriage to men in today's world?

I ask because the bulk of the finances to maintain a family for a pretty long time is dependent on then. So, what is that "catch" to be a married man? Like, if I start a business, I aim to make money in the long run while providing value to customers. What is that "profit" of marriage to a man?

My brother, marriage is actually supposed to be a wonderful thing. It is the oldest institution still in existence.

At a basic level, a man and a woman are supposed to work together. To create a sanctuary within which to grow and happily raise a family.
But nowadays, marriage has become a battlefield of wokery and shenanigans .

Genders now fail to complement each other. Some women say they have been too historically oppressed and now want their pound of flesh.

Well, right now, no-one benefits. Least of all the children. Even the benefits the women claim to have now is only temporary.

Chinua Achebe wrote : "Aneke the bird said since men began to shoot without missing, it has learnt to fly without perching".

Hakimi has shown how to hide your money from gold diggers.

The Chinese will one day create a machine to carry a baby for 9 months.

Everything will soon fall in place and water will find its level.

But for now, men have little to gain. Only to toil for decades and then kpafuka. Wife will be doing Omugo all over the world into old age.

Men just have to weigh things carefully. Expect nothing and expect anything. Do paternity on all kids.

shortgun:
A manipulative woman will use a man's child to blackmail him.
A wise man will know this and avoid the snare to save his soul

I know of several guys going through this right now. Both locally and abroad even worse. The women have cornered the kids for child benefit and single mother pay. By the time child is 18 and the mother ready to release them (kid may be leaving home to uni), then he/she is already brainwashed against the dad.

Girl children are much worse after brainwashing.

If a woman takes kids and keep preventing you from seeing the kids, just don't worry. Just have other kids. Take the ones willing to come back and leave the rest.

In my experience, the softer, more caring guys/dads suffer the most. Just harden up. Women will always do what they want to do.

Even God could not please Eve in the garden of Eden. Nor go kee yourself for woman.

ruggedboy01:
Why hangout with someone you don’t trust in the first place, oh since he’s your friend, he doesn’t visit your house where he can poison you without anyone noticing

For your own good, never make that mistake. Your friend can be eyeing your babe or wife even.

Nor loose guard. The line between friendship and enmity is very thin. In fact, there are more frenemies today than true friends.

The Mr Opener friend should have said, "Ol' boy, na free beer you give me so" and drink it.

There are mature ways to handle things. Of course, after that, you have known that the trust is not that big.

RaptorX:
Officer indeed, more like a recruit. I don't know why Nigerians get over excited joining the US Army as an enlisted soldier aka recruit. Army job is not prestigious or even well paid in the US, when you read news like this that person is viewing Army job from a Nigerian prism.

Not prestigious but comes with a lot of privileges as a veteran. Especially if you are still young enough and served for at least 6 years.

Lifestone:
How did Bashorun Gaa help to hold Oyo empire together, even from your own narration which is not in muchway different from those already history. Gaa is dubious, devilish, overambituos and ended badly

.
We were discussing this a while ago.

Even evil people can have a whole lot of talent, leadership skills and vision. Despite all their flaws.

Having practically disempowered every Alaafin from Labisi to Abiodun over about 24 years, he increasingly consolidated his power by various means. One way was to give military command positions to his kinsmen and cronies. Those fiercely loyal to him. With each Alaafin virtually in his pocket and Aare Ona Kakanfo never in the capital, Gaa called the shots on both domestic and foreign policy. Remember he was by right the Prime Minister.

Those cronies in command positions afforded him excellent intel on happenings all over and in frontier areas. And by extension, control of trade routes brought taxes, isakole and wealth into the treasury. And vitally, intel about what neighbouring powerful kingdoms/empires were likely to do.

It was also easier to assess the sentiments in areas over which Oyo may have loosely had hegemony. Making rebellion easier to thwart.

This grip collapsed as Gaa was defeated. Though a tyrant, Gaa's strategy worked as long as he was in power.

Even recent history has shown it. Zaire became very unstable after Mobutu and Ivory Coast had civil war after Houphouet-Boigny. See Iraq after Saddam Hussein and Yugoslavia collapsed after Bros Tito.

Of course, serious issues were already brewing underneath for years, but most tyrants can hold things together for a long time.

Kaiser20:
Ned should propose more wives for Men.
But the Tinubu Economy will not Permit

Meti99:
Why are you attaching Edo to Delta?
Delta state has nothing in link with Edo, we can even go with some part of Bayelsa and Ondo rather than Edo parasite

You don't know your history. Failed education system.

Urhobo and Isoko are Edoid people. Itsekhiri royal family is of Benin descent.

All the Ezechima clans of Onicha-Ugbo, Aboh, Isselukwu, Onicha-Olona and so on are of Benin descent.

Delta even came from Bendel (Benin-Delta).

BUT if you insist on going with Ijaw people, good luck. No sweat.

By the way, Edo has one of the largest inland natural gas deposits in 9ja. The sustainable and greener energy form.

If petrol is what you think is important, we are all going towards post-fossil fuel era.

Edo has gone it alone since Bendel was split up in 1991. Everyone is cool.

Several schools missing from the list, from 1944 to 1958.

kingzjay:
The question still remains... What are you bringing to the table?

Nothing to offer at all.

Why can't these people even disguise their oloshoism for one second? All about money and nothing else.


Tufiakwa!

Karrima:
What an insult!!! A player that gave them their first trophy in so many years.

Anyways, if the likes of balablu is not the president of a country in Africa, why would anyone leave his motherland to go elsewhere?

They need the money. This is the best time to get the most money on him at his peak.

Liverpool, Arsenal or Barca would suit him the most.

But he will adapt to PSG better/sooner having played in Ligue 1 before.

He could also help take Leverkusen to the next level but they lack the money.

Gerrard59:
I beggar to differ, sir. The problem is people who earn in pounds but lament about their expenses as if they are spending in naira. These people never state their earnings, but always whine about their expenses. The dishonesty is too much.

Gerard, how many people do you disclose your income to on a normal basis? Or you disclose your income to everyone you tell that life is expensive these days?

In 9ja, many wives don't know how much their husbands earn.

There is palpable bad belle in 9ja people. Village people kind of bad belly.

Years back, I told a friend in Lagos that things are tough everywhere o. In response to his incessant complaints.

The friend blated o. You say things are tough but you have not returned to 9ja.

I have consistently supported this friend. Consistently. I wonder if his complaints were meant to elicit what he could use to attack me.

He complained every time about money and cost in Lagos. I always told him to be patient.

On this occasion I asked him: All these years you have complained about Lagos cost of living, have I asked why you have not moved back to your village?

Fact is, our people are not that good folks like that. The more you travel and analyse so called friends, the more you know.

People talk of UK people being stingy. About 50% of relatives and friends in US never came back once in 20 years. Most cared about nobody. Even after family members in 9ja rallied to send them school fees in US for years o.

UK people are some of those most in touch with friends and family in 9ja.

Take people I know in the UK. Some have requests for help from 50 or more family and friends. You send 10k to each and that is 500k. In one go. Just like that.

Then you hear rubbish like: UK folks are stingy. They send only chicken change. Yada Yada Yada. The typical greedy 9ja person would prefer to be sent all the 500k alone and others can perish because they can't buy hypertension medicine worth 8k. The same complainer won't give a beggar N20.

Responses here show how very bitter majority of 9ja people are.

We didn't have social media or even GSM back in the day to learn from people abroad what the situation was.

Now you can hear directly from those abroad. You can weigh thing up better, plan better, avoid early mistakes upon arrival, etc.

But all you hear is "they won't come back o, you earn in pounds, what is minimum wage in UK, etc.

In 9ja we assume we too sabi. It is that assumption that makes us unable to learn and master basic things. Like how to run common election transparently, provide electricity, run a local council that benefits everyone locally, etc.

Something Rwanda and others are doing effortlessly.

1Sharon:
If your mother gave your dad another man's child now, he'll have the gall to vex.

You mum needs to start ARV if you don't want to lose her.

You see, in relationships, you can't easily tell who gave whom HIV.

The dad may have been promiscuous because men are reckless in promiscuity while women are VERY careful. Hacking phones and paternity tests have now revealed it.

With paternity fraud, the victim is the guy. With HIV, both suffer. Even the child as this thread shows.

No excuse for paternity fraud or reckless messing around sexually.

You see, I am in the position to say what I say because I have been in the position to hear woman say what they have been doing behind hubby's back. Yet bound by the rules not to let the hubby know. Including confirming from boyfriend outside that he has HIV. Yet hubby at home still does not know.

As for OP, there should be free ARV drugs for people with HIV. Your mum needs to know. So that she can take better care of herself. Including lifestyle aspect. You are 26. Even if your parents break up, you can cope.

Again, you can't 100% tell who gave whom. Unless there is clear evidence of regular tests by one party. For example, as a part of regular occupation health check. Our fathers and mothers are humans, with all the flaws you see in any other generation.