₦airaland Forum

I was drawn to this thread https://www.nairaland.com/5831213/tips-dating-african-american-akata by a friend of mine so i decided to read and see if i could pick some knowledge but to utmost surprise over 60% of the statements are wrong i mean totally, this is to correct that. We have many people who have never been to America before, so they dont have a wrong impression of the situation. I am a Nigerian, same way i get angry when people saying All Nigerians Are Scammer (Some Nigerians are scammers not all) is the same way i am angry when you stereotype a group of people because of certain people you met

i need to point this out. The kind of people you meet depend on your social circle. If you want to meet a different set of people change your social circle.
In America we have the Poor, Low Class, Lower Middle Class, Upper Middle, Rich, Super Rich.

The poor are the ones highligted in the thread created by pDudd.... they are the illetrates, into drugs, many baby daddies and living on government support. The rest of the group are pretty decent and wont date a Nigerian except the Nigerian is exceptional, they will rather date their fellow Americans. So people like the Poster go for the poor - The old, vulnerable, the druggies, the uneducated and nuisances. ( Just like we have Agberos, they also have here, we normally call them touts in naija.) but here their touts have cars and at least dress nice to some extent.


Tattoos.

If you don't like tattoos, you may want to reconsider going into a relationship with an African American. Most AA women have tattoos on different parts of their bodies. Many of them have tattoos of the names of their past lovers on their body. Some have it on their arms, legs, butts, lower back, breast, face, etc.

Imagine doing the thing from behind and staring down at another man's name on the butt of the woman you are doing. grin

So this is something to think about. Seriously.

CORRECTION - Tattoo all depend on the individual. I am have met alot of Americans who dont have tattoo. It is an individual thing and not a general thing. Just like some seeing Davido and a group of girls in Lekki then coming out to say all Nigerian girls have tattoo....

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pDudd:
Next tip: I have always been a Nigerian and I will be a Nigerian until I die. I will never burn my brother's cable. Anything that will help me to uplift my brothers, I will do it
So this brings me to the next point. Some of you want to know how to reach these women huh? Simple, use social media. Instagram and Facebook.

My advice to you is to go for the older ones. The ones in their 30s and 40s. The ones in their 50s have no oil left in their tank.

The ones in their 30s are desperate or have given up hope entirely and will pick anything that comes their way. The ones that have given up hope are better to get because they believe that men generally have no interest in them anymore but if you continue to holler them, they will begin to feel young and wanted again. Those ones will waste no time coming to naija to see you.

Also please do not form big boy for any of them. The more broke you are, the better. They just want a companion and someone who will love and be with them. They will take care of you cos they have money. Just tell them the truth and tell them your situation. Many of them have a soft heart and will pity you and want to make your life better just to keep you. So put your big boyism inside your pocket.

The ones that are in their 20s still have plenty of super visco static oil in their tank and won't have time for you. Don't go for those ones. You will just waste your time chasing them up and down on social media. I know they look good in the leggings and bum shorts but dont waste your time. Those ones are after niggas with tattoos and prison records.

I WILL RECOMMMEND YOU FOR A BAN. I know your type, looking for vulnerable women to use and dump, not wonder you cant find decent women. I Am Nigerian for your information. i just saw this post now.

scaramucci:
They are mostly projecting themselves in the other person. And in most cases, it is to gain advantage over the other white person.

Thanks.

pDudd:
Next tip: They are not very marriageable

African American culture stems from a background of single motherhood. Most AA females in the US are unmarried and if you look at their family's history, you will find out a history of multiple women with kids from different fathers. Even going back 3 generations. This is quite a normal occurrence in the African American community. There is nothing wrong with having different kids of different colors and skin tones from different men of different kind of color or skin tones. Many families have sibling who look nothing like each other.

Black women in America really don't believe in marriage. They see marriage as an inconvenience when they can be single and get as much penis as they can. Why get married?

So go ahead and marry if you find this unbothersome.

We all have different experience. I can see you are talking out of your own experience of the kind of ladies you have met. I am Nigerian, i just dont feel it is right for you to make an assertion on a group of people. Like someone saying Nigerian are Scammers. I am not a scammer i guess you are also not a scammer. That will be offensive. SOME NIGERIANS ARE SCAMMERS- will be right. I will say it again. It all depend on the type of girls you have been meeting.
I just finished watching Steve Harvey Show. - He just walked his Daughter down the Aisle. (Is he Asian ?)
Go watch this show - My Big White Wedding - You will see African American getting married with so much planning and joy.

You go to low places and you meet low life people and you make an Assertion that is how everybody is.... It is called Stereotyping and it is bad.

scaramucci:
Truth is the Democrats have messed up the African American population and are blaming it on Republicans. I love Republicans because they would rather show tough love. If you are shit, they tell you you are shit so that you can sit up.

Beware of a white person who calls another white person racist.

Please can you share your reason for this statement ''Beware of a white person who calls another white person racist.''

khiaa:
You tell so many lies you can't even keep them straight. In your prior post you typed that black American women will work 3 jobs to make sure her children are taken care of now you are saying they are bad mothers who neglect their children, the same children whom they work so hard for. Lies begot more lies

i have told him in long post that , the statement that African Americans are not good mother is absolutely wrong.

pDudd:
Next tip: African American women are very insecure. So don't cheat on them.

African American women are very possessive. And I mean that. Once they see you are a good Nigerian guy with money, prospects, potentials, money, a nice job, your own house or apartment, etc, they will cling to you like super glue to fingers. They know you are the best they have ever had and will ever have. You are a complete opposite of what they have been with all their lives. So they will begin to do EVERYTHING IN THEIR POWER TO KEEP YOU. At this point in the relationship, everything is sweet. She will research YouTube for how to cook Nigerian meals. She will research on Nigerian culture, attire, pidgin English, etc. She will also begin to watch YouTube videos on Nigerian weddings and she will begin to listen to Nigerian songs. She will invest all her time, effort, money, and her everything on you.

She will also begin to imagine herself as the bride in those grand Nigerian weddings that are on YouTube where the bridesmaids and groomsmen are dancing Davido and Burna Boy songs. At this point she is building her dreams and seeing herself like your wife already.

Because of all these lofty dreams she's having, please do not cheat on her. Cheating on her means those dreams won't come true eventually. She might just end your life if you destroy those dreams.

True 100%

pDudd:
Next tip: Akata women aren't very good mother's

An Akata woman will take care of herself and her boyfriend better than her kids. They will neglect their kids or leave them with Grandma just to go and get some good D or go clubbing. And the neglected kid may even be an infant but that means nothing.

Partying and enjoyment comes first before anything else.

I will try and pick some your wrong assertion.
This is wrong. There are lot of African American women i know who are good mothers. It all depends on your kind of life style and where you live and lastly your experience. I will suggest you dont generalise the statement., it is better you say some. Not all. Are Nigerian women good mothers ? Some are good while some are bad. Same thing.
I think i came to the discussion thread late, but for knowledge sake i will explain some things to you.

You come to America through visiting or schooling.
Lets start through visiting.
That is your CIRCLE. because of your level in the society. (You dont expect to meet someone reasonable in that circle)
Using Nigeria as an illustration (You live in Mushin and work in Mushin, definitely you will only meet Mushin girls 9 out of 10.) The chances of you meeting a non-mushin girl is low

Going to their dating site, you use POF.com. How many decent girls are on POF. Brother go to Paid dating site and you will see good one who are educated with a good family back ground. (Remember your circle determines who you meet)

Back to Akata, change your circle and you will meet some one better than what you have been describing.

Now you came to America through schooling - Most of those American Girls in college wont date a Nigerian, it is difficult, they will rather date fellow Americans. They are young and beautiful. so you end up going to free dating sites and you meet the illetrates ones and Agberos of the lot..... what do you expect. CHANGE YOUR CIRCLE.

omowolewa:
I believe Kastina may need it's own. Community Policing Structure to compliment Nigerian Security structure.

Local Problem, Local Solution.

I have said this before. State police is the way to go. But no the powers that be wont allow. Local problem local policing. Nigeria is one of the few country who still practice federal structure of police. A person from Lagos apples to be a police officer, you transfer the person to Jos. How effective will that police be ? Does he or she know the terrain of the state, what about language.. we keep doing the same thing and expecting a different result.

Nairaland has turned into a spam site where all kind of spams are dumped from nairabet spam to American WhatsApp and so on.

tohyorsih2:
Yes. My mum is a christian

So i practice both since we serve one God

yes we serve one God but something that makes you a Christian, that you have to believe in Jesus. Believe He is the son of God and confess with your mouth openly thou which you believe. If not, you are not different from herbalists who say they believe in ELEDUMARE and all that.

chineloSA:
That's Born Again Christians' attitude. You people think you have it all figured out, but you don't.
You constantly humiliate yourselves when you dont meet the same bars you set for yourselves.
You are the first ones to do the worst of sins.

Being Born Again means nothing.

That's the problem I feel a lot of folks have with Christians, you feel we don't make mistakes, we do make wrong decisions and even go over board. We do, bro ... let me speak for my self, I do... but what makes the difference is in your ability to come back to God humbly and guess what ? He is already waiting for you.

chineloSA:
Mmmceeewww as if being Born Again Christian gives you the birds eye view in everything.

Yes it does. When being led by the Spirit

fvck:
From her last statement she wrote "There's so much in this life to enjoy"
My dear nothing dey this lyf, singer Akon said "No need to cherish luxury cos everything comes and goes" so if you don't live your life for Jesus then it's a waste cos there's eternity,let's all live for it.

that's where we all get it wrong. People always trying to be holier than thou . I am a born again christian and what she said has nothing to do with her faith. THERE IS SO MUCH TO ENJOY IN LIFE. Yes. Joy, peace, healthy marriage, wonderful family and kids, love. Jesus died so we can have all this. There is truly so much to enjoy when you are in Christ. Nigerians and their holier than thou attitude. I am sure you did not read the full article.