Jack273:


Thank you

hi can I email you??

How do you deal with your partner and his family thinking you’re weird/have mental problems because you’re reserved.

I don’t really have a lot of friends
I don’t really like greeting people
I don’t like calling or being around people.

The more I try the more i fall back. I think it’s affecting my son too. Even to the point my partner called me autistic.

My personality is really hurting me.

You’ve got the wrong person sir. I have no idea about what you’re talking about. Thank you .

Ojo69:
Dear S.N.A,

You did not grow up abroad nor have you ever left Nigeria. There have never been an arranged married or any form and you are not married.

Please tell your truth or the truth.

First, explain to these strangers how you are still shocked that he has remind silent with everything, refused to speak up to your colleague when asked to know what's happening just so he don't build an uncomfortable work environment for you but since you've decided to bring this to an open space, please tell these straingers the truth.

Tell them about your continues infidelity for 7years starting from your lecturer to pass his course.

Tell them that you have refused to take your 5year old son to your parents, your parents don't know you have a child. You kept telling him you'll do it every december for the past 5years.

Tell them the truth, the father of that child is not a drunk, a gambler nor does he even have any addiction or drug habbits. Isn't this funny? Please include that you do drugs not just weed but crack (meth) a habbit I still don't know how you and your friend where able to finance. He threatened to tell your elder sister if you don't stop and you've always used trying to loose weight as an excuse to why you do drugs with your best friend. Again, please modify to correct that your son's father does not do drugs nor approve such lifestyle, i'll appreciate the honesty.

Tell them the truth that your son's father is a simple man, be honest enough.

Tell them the truth, that he has supported you with every breathe in him till you got a job and when low self esteem didnt let you face your job he put his life on hold and came to support you again looking after you and your son, doing laundry and cooking for you without complaining because your job is too tasking and you needed help till you could associate and find balance then he returned back to his house.

Tell them the truth, when your life picked up, he had financial crises for 5months from independently taking care of his sisters and conducting his fathers burial yet he still wasn't an asshole to you.

Tell them you spent a whole week in a mans house in your curent state of residence while you lied to him that you where in your friend Mrs.Bim's house becuase your house had a lickage that your landlord needed to fix.

Tell them that he skipped sending you upkeep money for his son just one month, same month he buried his dad and you unprovokedly insulted the living shit out of his life and dragged him for a 100k dept in owed you during the process of planning his fathers burial.

Tell them you did the same unprovoked 2months later and that was when he cut you off. Tell them that when you noticed his freelancing career had picked up again you started trying to reconnect by using his son to blackmail him and he kept blocking you.

Tell them the truth, tell them that you have refused to accept a patanity test for 4 out of the 5years you've had this child. If you must be terrible enough to bring this to an open space, uphold it in light of truth.

Tell them that he has always allowed you had your way with everything you wanted to do and you'v taken it as a weakness that you've always ridden on.

No family or friend of his disrespect nor ask when you'll be having another child. Who would when you aren't married ? Please, kindly explain to them why you still aren't married. Please, tell the truth.

Tell them that you follow %98 percent of single mom's and feminist on social media and your role model is Blessing C.E.O, Tonto Dike, iyabo ojo and their likes (no disrespect to them please) .

It's been 3months since both partie parted ways, his only request has been that you let your parents know the child exist and he will not send anymore child support until you do so. He didn't make a simple drama nor contacted you or anyone for any sort of issues. He simply continued his life without defaming you in anyway and I believe you should do same.

MEN MOST TIMES DON'T SPEAKUP AND SOME WOMEN USE THAT AS AN OPPORTUNITY TO DEFAME THEM.

Why should friends be discussing these kind of things together. I feel like it’s too personal..

DyingFetus:
I'm 21. My mom hanged herself when I was 10 after a heated argument with my dad and her.
I recently found out I'm autistic( Galatians syndrome) and i hate myself because of it, because of how obsessed I get over my special interests, because of how weird and uncaring i am with others.
I started therapy recently, and yet i feel so small and insignificant. I feel no consolation from knowing that there are others who are in my same condition.
If anything i feel like a massive hypocrite, sharing snippets of my life that nobody cares about, and yet here i am, asking for a fix like the lowly addict i am.
Is there any hope left for me?

what are the symptoms that made you believe you are autistic?

debbydams:
babe I'm going tru something similar...I'll share my experience when I'm free

please do and email me please

Allisgud:
Hope he is not a yahoo boy getting cash out before but now things don change u com dey see his shortcomings,give us full story,na something draw u to him

I forgot to even mention this in addition to all his problems, It’s not even like he had a lot of money. I felt that was the only option for him as he didn’t have his documents at the time when we met, so he couldn’t work. I was just too naive.

AMI3:
One sided story. Did he start all these bad attitude at once?

Let me hear from the man before i can put my mouth

he has been like this right from the beginning. I’m not perfect too but I know I’m not too bad

gard9ner:

There was no tangible attraction, it was probably about the money, she mentioned that it was an arranged marriage, probably the guy man used her for citizenship by marriage since she claimed to be a citizen by birth (though she didn’t mention the country by I assume somewhere in Europe from her statement about divorce protocols).

They used her so how will they value her, well, there is always a way in every situation. This is a small case, I’ve met worse

we didn’t do an arangee marriage.

gard9ner:

Wow wow wow

Well, I wish I could meet you in person, it’s good you brought this in public but it’s also not good. Like in most of my posts on NL I try to be brief so find the pony.

First, in all your talks, I noticed you didn’t mention your own family and parents, where are they, why are they not fully involved in your matter, for you to come here, you must have exhausted all options.

Secondly, my dear I read a few comments and those advising you to pack up and leave etc, you’re 29 right? And you’re a mother, you’ve so much autonomy and can decide for yourself.

Lastly, they say first things first reduces…what to what again? You should know what I’m saying you claimed you schooled overseas. Well, I suggest you leave everything you’re doing right now and go to your Maker in prayer and ask for guidance, ask God what his purpose and will is for your life don’t get up from your knees until you get directions and answers, people who are even in worst situations than you will come on here to advise you but pls be careful.

If you care pls send me a dm, maybe I or since you’re a woman, probably my team will help with counselling.

they are involved but what can they do? They can’t force this man to change.. they can’t force him to do anything. They’ve tried talking to him but he has a lot of pride and ego. What can they do?

Mobog:
I've people doing this... I beg you do not near pos business if you're not the one doing it. Scamming those employed into the system by this thief is rampant

I’ve responded

Mindlog:


With all you listed, do you still want him to pay your bride price?

not really.. I guess I just feel ashamed of the situation I’m in. But then I ask myself how hard will it be to find someone else.. especially with a child?

Foodqueen:
With all the complain above, you still have it in mind for him/his family to propose.

I don’t think so. I think I can’t believe that I’ve reduced myself like this. It bothers me a lot..

zarathustra:
It's a tough one especially with his addictions and lack of seriousness in carrier. Nevertheless, it's not going be easy for you when you quit. Are you working? And how far have you gone or intend to go on your profession. Am asking cos if you focus and channel your energy to your profession and job it will temporary calm your tension and time can work wonders. But on no occasion should you take in again under this condition.In all am suggesting you stay and focus more on your profession and pls don't take in again for now.

I’m working, I’m doing averagely okay. I can do better which I’m striving towards at the moment. Having a child really set me back but I’m getting there. The most important thing is that I have money coming in every month and I have a very supportive family.

Hi

I’m a girl in her late 20s, I live abroad was born here but spent most of my schooling years in Nigeria. I came back to do university. I’ve been with a guy now for 7 years who hasn’t paid my bride price properly due to the fact he did an arangee marriage and the divorce process is taking too long. I got with him in my early 20s.. and have a child with him. I believed in him but now I’m at the point where I’m honestly frustrated and tired. I really don’t know who to run to to express myself. We are living together but I really want to run away and start my life afresh but I want to be told the truth. I really want to be married and content, It feels like this guy has reduced me to nothing. Im so ashamed of my situation with him, it’s like I’ve disgraced myself and my family. I’m going to try and list out all the issues we’ve been facing.

1. He’s very confused about his career path. One minute he’s a musician.. then he wants to be a painter.. then he wants to be chef. This is a man in his late 30s

2. He has anger issues. We have tussled on some occasions and he threatens to beat me when he’s angry but so far he hasn’t

3. He has addictions. Betting drinking smoking. To the point where he drank so much that he almost killed himself . I was honestly fooled by the fact that he was a worker in the church and I “believed” I could change him. Young and dumb I guess.

4. Cannot communicate properly. To the point we have not had a proper conversation in almost 2 months but we are living together. I feel so lonely and stuck.

5. He insults me so bad to the point where I question myself.

6. He is not very hardworking and I don’t gel well with his family and friends.

7. None of his family ever talk about marriage or paying my bride price. All they ever ask is when I’m having another child for him. They have reduced me to nothing and I can’t blame them.

I will say that when I’m angry I can be verbally abusive also. He also claims that I’m too reserved and isolated. I feel like I’ve been pushed to the wall and I can’t recognise myself.

I really want to run away.. and start afresh. Where will I start from? I have a son how easy will it be to find love again? All the love I have for this man has gone..I don’t know if it can be rectified. He has really seen me finish.



Thank you .

front page please

Thanks