₦airaland Forum

nitlad: Orisirisi

Tuface dey do wedding this one too dey do wedding

I guarantee you this thread will be swallowed up by the other wedding in Dubai It will be like this thread doesn't even exist! Tuface is rightly gulping all the traffic!

You should have postponed your wedding

i cry for nairalanders to please borrow this guy brain... Enemy of progress!

nitlad: Orisirisi

Tuface dey do wedding this one too dey do wedding

I guarantee you this thread will be swallowed up by the other wedding in Dubai It will be like this thread doesn't even exist! Tuface is rightly gulping all the traffic!

You should have postponed your wedding

i cry for nairalanders to please borrow this guy brain...

MOD, please do your work by hidden some post of all those nairalanders with fish brain...

JOKE: A mum was lucky enough to see her three daughters wed in d same year, So she whispered to each of them "After your weddings "Text me your 1st night experience and don't forget to text it in a coded way o!

After a week, the 1st daughter sent 'NESCAFE' in an sms 2 her mum while a week later, the 2nd texted 'BENSON'.

Their mum, as a soji woman, picked up a tin of Nescafe & read from d label: (fantastic till d last drop)...

She also went 2 her husband's pack of Benson Cigarettes & found written on it: (extra long, king size) she thought aloud; 'not too bad for them @ their age sha!

A few days later, her 3rd daughter's text comes in: (Arik: Lagos - Kano)...

So Mama calls Arik Air Information Desk to inquire about their kano -lagos flight. She was told; "Its 3times daily, 7days a week & the flight duration is 75mins to & fro!".

Mama throws herself in the air, lands,
slumps & faints shouting......

"Yeeeeee!
Eleyi ma pa mi lomo O°˚...

How as been ur day my pple?

Dear friends: Some people Couldn't Wake up Today to hold their Phone as Are Doing rite now. If you re Alive and Online, You should At least say THANK YOU LORD...

Dear guys: The girl u dumped, someone else will surely date her. Maybe marry her. Another girl who has been dumped by another guy will be your wife. it's a Cycle game. All na second hand jor.
May God help us...

LADIES: Classy Girls don't have Tattoos. Reason is because, no one will intentionally scratch a Bentley or a Private Jet. If you have a Tattoo on you, u are nothing but a Danfo.

GUYS: abi i lie ni?

JOKE: A plane carrying politicians crashed into a farm. When the police arrived, they found out that the farmer had already buried them.
The following conversation ensued.

POLICE: Are you sure they were dead?.

FARMER: Yes, I'm very sure, though I heard some screaming "Help me! I'm still alive o!", but you know these politicians, they lie alot!

JOKE: Boy drops girl at home, he puts his hand on d wall by d gate for support, leans towards her.

BOY: Can I kiss you?
GIRL: Not now, I'm at home.

BOY: Please.
GIRL: No.

BOY: You were too sweet in bed today.
GIRL: Waoh! you too, full of energy. I could not believe we had four rounds.

BOY: Let me kiss u good night.
GIRL: Someone may be watching,they still think I'm a virgin at home.

This goes on for ten minutes, then girl's brother appears at the gate and says "Dad says whether u kiss him or not its your decision, but tell that bastard to remove his hand from the intercom button, everyone at home is listening to your conversation...

@OP, im very Ƨ☹Ʀяƴ to tell you that Lil Wayne is performing live today @Ohio.
Who the hell gat dat blog of fake news?

See haters!

#Young.Money.Fan#

Dis is not a radio station where u will just give news without source.

Please SOURCE!

Thou shall not kill...

Please safe this man from committing suicide...

Olumikedos: fellow NL, how do i modify a post?

Go to your yahoo mail, login, click on compose, put the subject and your writeup.
Then send to my oga@nairaland.ask the remaining from seun.

The National Human Rights Commission
(NHRC) has commenced nationwide
training of police personnel following a
request to that effect by the Inspector
General of Police, Mr. Abubakar
Mohammed.
The Executive Secretary of the NHRC,
Prof. Bem Angwe, who disclosed this in
Abuja on Tuesday, said that police
officers are being trained on
Fundamental Human Rights as contained
in Chapter 4 of the Nigerian constitution,
the Convention Against Torture, as well as
other human rights instruments which
highlight international human rights
standards in policing.
Other areas of the training, according to
Professor Angwe, include the “rights of
suspects to be treated with dignity” and
“respect and proportionality in the use of
force during arrests and while monitoring
protests”.
He said the training of officers on human
rights is part of the efforts of the
commission and the Police to proactively
address the frequent incidents of human
rights violations in police operations in
the country.
Angwe also disclosed that the commission
has developed a comprehensive training
manual which will be used for training in
police colleges throughout the country.
The training sessions, which are part of
the training schedule for promotion in
police training institutions, are being
conducted in 14 centres across the
country.

Dear Nairalanders, what is your view on this?

The giant of Africa is a country dat hav so many OGA at the TOP...

OR

Let ♍e check www.google dot the remaining is with oga at the top

c0ast0l: @op. Id!ot.. Get A Life...Slowpoke!

Are you aware na joke section u dey?
Why causing?
Pls who collect ur bread?

Now go and meet the person dat collect ur bread to help u wit a brain transplant...

Omo ale jatijati...

Tpave: were and madness joined together @ op.

Is this english?

Mr Bean as been appointed as the new pope... Lolz

Police Barrack,
Army Barrack,
Navy Barrack,
Custom Barrack,
Airforce Barrack...

So which of the Barrack do you feel like hearing the experiences?

You can halla Barrack Obama for is experience...

Popular Evangelist Benny Hinn and his ex-wife Suzanne divorced back in 2010 after Suzanne's struggle with prescription medicine caused problem in their marriage.

The 60-year-old evangelist has remarried his ex-wife Suzanne in Orlando Florida.

The wedding took place on the 3rd of March, 2013 in the company of top ministers of God like Roy Harthern (Suzanne's dad), Reinhard Bonnke and Jay Hartford.

The officiating ministers called their wedding a miracle after over two years of separation between them.

According to Reinhard Bonnke, the miracle of this remarriage was even greater than the miracle of any marriage.

Benny Hinn said nothing until the end of the ceremony when he prayed over his wife Suzanne as the visiting men of God crowded around.

Benny Hinn and Suzanne' remarriage ceremony was a traditional one. It lasted for about 2 hours.

Their children and their spouses were their parents' attendants.

The Hinns have 4 children and four grandchildren.

Few weeks to Benny Hinn and wife' remarriage, below is what he shared with his audience about their reconciliation plan.

It all began at Christmas when we were together at Suzanne's house in Orlando, Florida. Suzanne and I and all of our children and grandchildren were there. It was a beautiful day I will never forget, and that is when the Lord began to do His mighty work.

Suzanne and I want to thank you, from the bottom of our hearts, for praying for us and our family. The Lord has surely answered your prayers! Suzanne and I are more in love with each other than ever before.

The covenant we made with God more than 30 years ago was never broken in His sight. Both of us believe our greatest days are ahead and the best is yet to come.

The last three years have been very painful for Suzanne and me and for the children-more painful than we can ever explain or describe. Suzanne and I will share much more with you in a future letter and soon on This Is Your Day.

Our marriage died for two reasons. One, I, Benny Hinn, was married to the ministry, not realizing it was killing my marriage. And two, Suzanne started taking certain prescription medications to help her cope with some of her personal struggles. She became dependent on those for nearly 15 years, and those medications made her behave erratically at times. As her husband, I did not know what kinds of medicine she was taking or realize what they were doing to her.

After the divorce, Suzanne, on her own accord, decided that she needed professional help to gain freedom from her chemical dependence and checked herself into the Betty Ford clinic in early 2010. And for three and a half months she underwent exhaustive treatment. Today she is totally set free from the need for these medications-she is completely whole-and for that I give the Lord Jesus the praise.

The truth of the matter is that Suzanne filed for divorce because she was crying out for help. The divorce most certainly woke me up, and the Lord used it to show me-as a man of God and as a man-that I cannot function properly without my wife and family.

Not only did our family suffer as a result, but the ministry also suffered greatly. Many partners walked away, not realizing or knowing what took place and why. But I believe that the Lord is restoring not just my family but also the ministry.

Because of our experience, God will do more with us in the future.

Una no serious... If terrorist enter trough that route, na you people go dey complain...

My suggestion is that dos officers sud be put to check for there inhuman attitude on dat route.

Grant them Amnesty and see if i won't start up my own militant group...

Nice point to be consider...

Thank you for the copy and paste...

With all this weapons, are they planning for war?

Okay, we don see dem. What next?

#Occupy.Nairaland.Moderators#

There are better tread we need on front page. Not this type...

Mtchew!

@OP. Will you be alive to experience it?

Wise up!

Na all banks ooo.

You can confirm dis in your bank customer care.

@ OP, Nairalanders won't give you the needed answer...

Please ask GOOGLE

For the first time in about 10 months, the
leader of Jama'atu Ahlil Sunnah Lid
da'awati Wal Jihad, better known as Boko
Haram, has appeared in a new video,
asserting that his sect has not suspended
its violent attacks and rejecting dialogue
with the Nigerian government.
In the nine-minute video that is being
circulated in Nigeria, Imam Abubakar
Shekau describes as fraud and lies, the
dialogue purportedly being undertaken by
one Imam Abdulazeez on behalf of Boko
Haram. He says there none of his
officials is known as Abdulazeez and he
doesn’t know the said Abdulazeez.
"It is a lie, there is nothing like ceasefire
or dialogue going on with government,”
he says. “We have never sat in any
meeting for dialogue, we have not and it
is not true that we are talking with
Nigerian government. We don't know the
Imam Abdulazeez, he is not speaking on
our behalf like he claimed. He is not one
of us, I don't know him.
"There are procedures of dialogue as it is
spelled out in Islam, they are busy
arresting our people, small boys and
women and so they are not serious with
any dialogue and we are also not
interested in any talking with them. We
are only doing God's work and serving
Him and not men."
He further maintains that the time for
any dialogue effort with the Nigerian
government has passed, and that no
further talk about dialogue will be
entertained by the sect.
He accused the government of continuing
to arrest members of Boko Haram, as well
as their wives and children, sometimes on
the pretext that they are armed robbers.

Source: mobile.saharareporters.com/news-page/boko-haram-leader-imam-shekau-says-his-sect-has-not-suspended-attacks-and-time-dialogue-al

Dear nairalanders, let's here and gain from your NYSC experience...

STATE.......... KADUNA STATE
PPA............ Ministry of agriculture. Kaduna North.
BATCH.......... C
PLATOON: 5
YEAR........... 2011/2012
CAMP........... BLACK GOLD CAMP
CDS............ Nigeria Red Cross

Sail Team.Madrid