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Education / At Last Yaba Don Past There Admission List by bigold(f): 6:55pm On Nov 28, 2008 |
At last Yabatech have past there admission list. so you can go to the school now and check your name. |
Jokes Etc / Interesting Phone Conversation by bigold(f): 11:23am On Nov 06, 2008 |
K-"Who's calling?" W-"Watt." K-"What is your name, please?" W-"Watt's my name." K-"That's what I asked you. What's your name?" W-"That's what I told you. Watt's my name." A long pause, and then from Watt, W-"Is this James Brown?" K-"No, this is Knott." W-"Please tell me your name." K-"Will Knott." W-Why not? K-Huh? What do you mean why not? W-Yeah! Why won't you tell me your name? K-But I told you my name! W-Didn't you say you will not? K-Not not, knott, Will Knott! W-That's what I mean. K-So you know my name. W-Of course not! K-Good. So now, what is yours? W-Watt. Yours? K-Your name! W-Watt's my name. K-How the hell do I know? I am asking you! W-Look I have been very patient and I have told you my name and you have not even told me yours yet. K-You have been patient, what about me? I have told you my name so many times and it is you who have not told me yours yet. W-Of course not! K-See, you even know my name! W-Of course not! K-Then why do you keep saying of course Knott? W-Because I don't. [Pause] K-What is your name? W-See, you know my name! K-Of course not! W-Then why do you keep asking Watt is your name? K-To find out your name! W-But you already know it! K-What? W-See, and you know mine! K-Of course not! W-Exactly! K-Listen, listen, wait; if I asked you what your name is, what will be your answer? W-Watt's my name. K-No, no, give me only one word. W-Watt K-Your name! W-Right! [pause before it hits him] K-Oh, Wright! W-Yeah! K-So why didn't you say it before? W-I told you so many times! K-You never said Wright before W-Of course I did. K-Ok I won't argue any more. Do you know my name? W-I do not. K-Well, there you go, now we know each other's name. W-I do not! K-Good! [pause before it hits him] W-Oh, Guud! K-Good. W-No wonder, it took me so long, is that Dutch? K-No, it's Knott! W-Oh, okay. At least the names are clear now Guud. K-Yes Wright. |
Education / Yaba Tech Post Pce by bigold(f): 10:39am On Oct 24, 2008 |
please is there anyone that know about Yaba Tech Post jamb, i mean there post PCE. please is there form out. Pls if there is anybody that know any unversity in Lagos that is selling Part Term form, Pls do not esitate to tell me. |
Romance / Re: Would You Marry A Selfish Guy? by bigold(f): 8:54am On Aug 19, 2008 |
@lucabrasi I am not saying he is sponsoring my school, I only said he does not want me to go to school. And even if he have the money to sponsor me, I will never allow him because he is too proud for my likeness. @ all Thanks so much, I am really grateful. And to the people who insult me thanks and May God forgive u. |
Romance / Re: Would You Marry A Selfish Guy? by bigold(f): 2:17pm On Aug 18, 2008 |
@hollandis what do u mean, u have no right to insult me, all i need is ur advise and if u cannot, just shut ur dirty mouth because i didnt come hear for ur insult. May God forgive u |
Romance / Would You Marry A Selfish Guy? by bigold(f): 2:03pm On Aug 18, 2008 |
i ve a boyfriend that we have been dating for 6 years, but that six years is like hell to me, because he does'n trust me, and he is always complaining about what i do, he does not like it when i make up and he complain of whta i wear. He is so selfish that even when i told him that i want to further my education, he is complaining, he prefer to do the thing that will favour him and hurt me, but still claim that he love me and he want to marry me. he even said whether i like it or not he is going to marry me. although i did not see him with any other girl, he said he is going crazy because of me. Now i don't know what to do because he complain too much and i can stand him any longer, and the worst part is that he always said that if we get married, he did not think our married will last. please help me out. what do i do. |
Jokes Etc / The Priest And The Three Boys by bigold(f): 12:54pm On Apr 25, 2008 |
Every Sunday 3 boys would go to church and confess. So the first boy went up to the priest. The priest says "What have you done bad in your life son". The boy responds with "I've swore to my mother." The priest says" take one sip of holy water." The second boys goes up to the priest and the priest says, "What have you done bad in your life son?" The boy responds with "I've stolen something". The priest says take two sips of holy water. After every sip the third boy is laughing his head off. So the third boy goes up to the priest and the priest says, "What have you done bad in your life son" The boy responds with, "I pissed in the holy water." |
Romance / Re: My Boy Friend Want Us To Get Married But: by bigold(f): 5:47pm On Apr 03, 2008 |
@ All once again THANKS, THANKS, THANKS A LOT |
Romance / Re: My Boy Friend Want Us To Get Married But: by bigold(f): 9:28am On Apr 03, 2008 |
@all Thank u very much for ur candid advice, may God bless u all. (Ameeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen) |
Romance / Re: My Boy Friend Want Us To Get Married But: by bigold(f): 11:00am On Apr 02, 2008 |
am really sorry my friend i appreciate u alot, OMO IBO thanks very very much |
Romance / Re: My Boy Friend Want Us To Get Married But: by bigold(f): 10:42am On Apr 02, 2008 |
@ All especially almondjoy, Blossom-ng and jkpretty I really thank u for ur advice God bless u all. luv u |
Romance / Re: My Boy Friend Want Us To Get Married But: by bigold(f): 9:42am On Apr 02, 2008 |
@ almodjoy thanks for your advice, sceening is post jamb, u know how education in nigeria is, after jamb u will do post jamb, about my jamb my jamb result is very good but they said if i no get leg u know what i mean it will be very hard to enter school. |
Romance / Re: My Boy Friend Want Us To Get Married But: by bigold(f): 9:23am On Apr 02, 2008 |
@ OMO IBO I really appreciate u a lot, thank u very much for ur advice |
Romance / Re: My Boy Friend Want Us To Get Married But: by bigold(f): 9:04am On Apr 02, 2008 |
@ Tattooboy u don't have to insult me, i asked u for advice and if u can't, find something to do. @ Gbemyte I am 2* years @almondjoy i want to do jamb, i have been doing some which i make but the screening mess me up. |
Romance / Re: My Boy Friend Want Us To Get Married But: by bigold(f): 4:45pm On Apr 01, 2008 |
Its like u guys did not understand me, i said we have been dating for six years. but now i am proccessing my school (university) so i told him to wait for me for sometime atlease for me to get admission. |
Romance / My Boy Friend Want Us To Get Married But: by bigold(f): 12:27pm On Apr 01, 2008 |
Hello i need somebody to help, i have been dating a guy for about six years now and he want us to get married as soon as possible but i am told him that i am still proccess my school but its like he is getting tired, what do u think i can do. pls help |
Romance / Can You Marry An Illitrate by bigold(f): 6:54pm On Mar 23, 2008 |
To everybody in the house can u marry and illiterate if No WHY CANT U AND IF YES WHY |
Jokes Etc / I Know The Whole Truth by bigold(f): 1:09pm On Mar 14, 2008 |
At school, a boy was told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth". The boy decides to go home and try it out. He goes home, and as he is greeted by his mother he says, "I know the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, "Just don't tell your father." Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth." The father promptly hands him $40 and says, "Please don't say aword to your mother." Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day, when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, "I know the whole truth." The mailman drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, "Then come give your FATHER a big hug. |
Jokes Etc / Meaning Of Tragedy by bigold(f): 1:35pm On Mar 07, 2008 |
Bill Clinton is in an elementary class and is trying to teach the students what a tragedy is. He asks if anyone knows. One kid stands up and says, "I know. If I was in the street and got hit by a car, that would be a tragedy." Clinton says, "No son, that would be an accident." Another kid stands up and says, "I know. If we all were on a field trip and the bus went flying over a cliff, that would be a tragedy." Again, Clinton says, "No son, that would be a great loss." The children are silent and then one kid stands and says, "If you and Mrs. Clinton were on Air Force One and it just all of a sudden blew up and you both died, that would be a tragedy." Clinton thinks and then asks, "Now why would you think that is a tragedy?" The kid replies, "Well, because it definately wouldn't be an ACcident. and it sure as hell wouldn't be a Great Loss!!!" |
Jokes Etc / Re: Missing Goat by bigold(f): 4:28pm On Feb 22, 2008 |
@knotty This is not the right place for u why dont u go to NTA, or AIT , i thing tht will be the best place for u. See the goat, Ur goat get HIV? |
Jokes Etc / The Damn Dishes by bigold(f): 5:37pm On Feb 20, 2008 |
There's this guy who's in the market for a used motorcycle. Always wanted a nice big hog. So he's shopping around, answering ads in the newspaper, and not having much luck. One day he comes across a beautiful classic Harley with a for sale" sign on it. Upon inspection, he is amazed to find the bike in mint condition. He inquires about it with the owner: "This bike is beautiful! I'll take it. But you gotta tell me how you keep it in such good shape. "Well," says the seller, "it's pretty simple. Just make sure that if the bike is outside and it's going to rain, rub Vaseline on the chrome. It protects it from the rain. In fact, since you're buying the bike I won't need my tube of Vaseline anymore. Here, you can have it." and he hands the buyer a tube of Vaseline. So the guy buys the bike and off he goes, a happy biker. He takes the bike over to show his girlfriend. She's ecstatic (being a Harley fan). That night, he decides to ride the bike over to his girlfriend's parents' house. It's the first time he's going to meet them and figures it will make a big impression. When the couple gets to the house, the girlfriend grabs her boyfriend's arm. "Honey," she says, "I gotta tell you something about my parents before we go in. When we eat dinner, we don't talk. In fact, the person who says anything during dinner has to do the dishes." "No problem," he says. And in they go. The boyfriend is astounded. Right smack in the middle of the living room is a huge stack of dirty dishes. In the family room, another huge stack of dishes. Piled up the stairs, dirty dishes. In fact, everywhere he looks, dirty dishes. They sit down to dinner and, sure enough, no one says a word. As dinner progresses, the boyfriend decides to take advantage of the situation. So he leans over and kisses his girlfriend. No one says a word. So he decides to reach over and handle her breasts. He looks at her parents, but still they keep quiet. So he stands up, grabs his girlfriend, strips her naked, and they make love right on the dinner table. Still, no one says a word. "Her Mom's kinda cute", he thinks. So he grabs his girlfriend's Mom and has his way with her right there on the dinner table. Again, total silence. Then, a few raindrops hit the window and the boyfriend realizes it's starting to rain. He figures he'd better take care of the motorcycle, so he pulls the Vaseline from his pocket. Suddenly the father stands up and shouts: "All right, all right! I'll do the damn dishes." |
Jokes Etc / Sooooooo funny, dont know what to use as subj by bigold(f): 1:09pm On Feb 19, 2008 |
A pretty blonde woman is driving down a country road in her new sports car when something goes wrong and it breaks down. Luckily, she happens to be near a farmhouse. She goes up to the farmhouse and knocks on the door. When the farmer answers, she says to him, "It's Sunday night and my car broke down! I don't know what to do! Can I stay here for the night until tomorrow when I can get some help?" "Well," drawls the farmer, "you can stay here, but I don't want you messing with my sons Jed and Luke." She looks through the screen door and sees two men standing behind the farmer. She judges them to be in the early twenties. "Okay," she says. After they have gone to bed for the night the woman begins to get a little Hot just thinking about the two boys in the room next to her. So she quietly goes into their room and says, "Boys, how would you like for me to teach you the ways of the world?" They say, "Huh?" She says, "The only thing is, I don't want to get pregnant, so you have to wear these rubbers." She puts them on the boys, and the three of them go it all night long. Forty years later, Jed and Luke are sitting on the front porch, rocking back and forth. Jed says, "You remember that blonde woman that came by here about forty years ago and showed us the ways of the world?" "Yeah", says Luke, "I remember." "Well, do you care if she gets pregnant?" "Nope," says Luke, "I reckon not." "Me neither" says Jed, "Let's take these things off!" |
Jokes Etc / A Fourth Grade Boy And A Fourth Grade Girl by bigold(f): 12:40pm On Feb 19, 2008 |
There was a fourth grade boy and a fourth grade girl. The fourth grade boy came by the fourth grade girl's house with a football and teased the girl saying, "Ha Ha! You can't have a football cause your a girl." The girl goes to her mom crying so her mom buys her a football. The boy got angry. So the next day he comes by with a boys bike and teases her saying, "Ha Ha! You can't have a boys bike cause your a girl!" So the girl goes crying to her mom and she gets a boys bike. The boy gets very mad. So the next day the boy comes by, pulls down his pants and says, "I have one of these and you can't go crying to your mom to get one!!!" She goes crying to her mom and then the girl comes out pulls up her dress and says, "My mom said as long as I have one of these I can get as many of those that I want!" |
Jokes Etc / Got Any Grapes by bigold(f): 12:34pm On Feb 18, 2008 |
One day a duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender "Do you got any grapes?" The bartender says, "No we don't serve grapes here." So the duck leaves and returns the next day and asks "Do you got any grapes?" The bartender says "No we don't serve grapes here." So the duck leaves and returns for the next five days asking the same question. The fifth day the bartender gets pissed and says, "If ask for grapes one more time, I'm gonna nail your dick to the floor!" So the duck leaves and returns the next day and asks "Got any hammers?" "No." replies the bartender. "Got any nails?" "No." "Got any grapes?" |
Jokes Etc / Chrismas Gift by bigold(f): 12:26pm On Feb 18, 2008 |
John and Jack were talking about the Christmas gifts they were getting their wives. John said, "I got Kathy a pair of slippers and a Love Machine." "That’s a strange combination," said Jack. "It’s a great combination," replied John, "if she doesn’t like the slippers, she can go Bleep herself." |
Jokes Etc / A Scotsman And An Englishman by bigold(f): 12:22pm On Feb 18, 2008 |
A Scotsman and an Englishman lived next door to each other. The Scotsman owned a hen and each morning would look in his garden and pick up one of his hen's eggs for breakfast. One day he looked into his garden and saw that the hen had laid an egg in the Englishman's garden. He was about to go next door when he saw the Englishman pick up the egg. The Scotsman ran up to the Englishman and told him that the egg belonged to him because he owned the hen. The Englishman disagreed because the egg was laid on his property. They argued for a while until finally the Scotsman said, 'In my family we normaly solve disputes by the following actions: I kick you in the groin and time how long it takes you to get back up, then you kick me in the groin and time how long it takes for me to get up. Whoever gets up quicker wins the egg.' The Englishman agreed to this and so the Scotsman found his heaviest pair of boots and put them on, he took a few steps back, then ran toward the Englishman and kicked as hard as he could in the balls. The Englishman fell to the floor clutching his nuts howling in agony for 30 minutes. Eventually the Englishman stood up and said, 'Now it's my turn to kick you.' The Scotsman said, 'Keep the damn egg.' |
Jokes Etc / Re: Preposterous! Unimaginable! Unthinkable! by bigold(f): 1:58pm On Feb 16, 2008 |
Obasanjo was found furking 10 years old girl |
Jokes Etc / Panda by bigold(f): 1:20pm On Feb 16, 2008 |
A panda walks into a bar, sits down and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the bartender shouts, "Hey, Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the bartender, "Hey man, I'm a Panda! Look it up!" The bartender opens his dictionary and sees the following definition for panda: "A tree-dwelling marsupial of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves." |
Jokes Etc / The Definition Of The Word "definitely" by bigold(f): 10:51am On Feb 16, 2008 |
The kindergarten teacher is trying to explain to her class the definition of the word "definitely" to them. To make sure the students have a good understanding of the word, she asks them to use it in a sentence. When called upon the first student says " The sky is definitely blue". The teacher said " Well that isn't entirely correct because sometimes it's gray and cloudy". Another student says" Grass is definitely green". Teacher again replies " If grass doesn't get enough water it turns brown, so that isn't really correct". Another student raises his hand and asks the teacher "Do farts have lumps?". The teacher replied, "No, and that is not a suitable question for class discussion". The student replies, "Then I definitely shit my pants". |
Jokes Etc / Re: Another Question To Answer, Pls No Insult by bigold(f): 9:32am On Feb 16, 2008 |
@kronkykay na becos u no know the answer, the question is correct @Lolabbey if u get the answer i will build a house for u |
Jokes Etc / Re: Another Question To Answer, Pls No Insult by bigold(f): 5:34pm On Feb 15, 2008 |
Another Q. What's six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild? |
Jokes Etc / Re: Super Bowl by bigold(f): 1:37pm On Feb 15, 2008 |
@ ituen Bro na u sabi but i didnt know about that, i just post my own. |
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