₦airaland Forum

Fekumzi123:
I can't continue reading this, sorry.
I used to think I am not smart, I didn't know there are guys like you out there.
As in, you find it difficult to raise 5k for your mum but you gave your wife 5m and she borrowed her friend 1.5m from it.
Hmnnnn....
Does your wife gives you BJ everyday?

I didn't find it hard to give my mom the 5k, things have been difficult for me, I sold my land to raise the 5m that I gave my wife for her business. However, you're still right, I should have remembered to give my mom even more than the 5k she requested for to send to her mom, before giving my wife the 5m, better still I should have given her 4m and give my mom 50k and use the remainder for something else.

Brandiebird:
I feel dumber for reading this post. BUT we never have sons like and may we find husbands like you. Amen!

Hmmmm

nedekid:
Oga so you sold land 6m, pocketed 1m and give 5m to your wife?
Had I know is the last comment of a fool according to gheghe.
Op read my post from yesterday, it may matter to you.
https://www.nairaland.com/8747310/she-flares-up-anytime-she/1#140634201

Thank you sir, I will go through your thread right away.

Blaqbea:
How will you be spending much on your mother in-law and forget about your own mothers needs, and also telling your family you gave your wife money to start up a business will make them feel she's draining you financially thereby making your family to start developing hatred on your wife

My family isn't like that, they won't hate her, they've always loved her right from the start. Even when she have only visited my mom just twice, and on both visits I accompanied her, she have never visited my mom alone. She saw and visited my mom just twice before we got married, yet my mom didn't in any way refused or objected for me getting married to her. It took my this long to notify my family about the money because my mom have been battling leg pains for years, in which the drugs needed for her treatment was calculated by the doctor we took her to, it was calculated 266k, it's been 9 months and counting and I haven't been able to buy the drugs for her, she's still in great pains and can no longer walk properly. I was disappointed that I gave my wife 5m and couldn't pay for my mom drugs for her to be fine again. Thinking about everything right now, i feel so useless.

sacajawea:
Fake story. Not true

Okay

ManknowThyself:
Abeg I nor get advice for you, no advice, no no no no advice for you man.


Jesus Christ, Holy Spirit and God forbid me to advice you Mr husband of the generation.


When your mama won come enjoy her suffer for your life?

You get business of your own?

Why will you sell a land for 6m without investment of 3m in yourself before settling her own?

These are just questions you have to ask yourself.


Haven’t said that, your wife has no business for what you do or buy for your mum to the extent of taking the phone you bought for her. Then never born and will never born that woman to try that with me with my mum.

This is not love , rather low self esteem, lack of self respect, lose of masculinity and dignity as a man.

I don't have a business of my own

I sat down this evening, and started thinking hard regarding the phone i bought for my mom and she took it and started using it, herself. One of the reason i was forced to create this thread. Each time I bring the issue it always end up in quarrel and her usual manipulative talks. Na now i dey know say i nor be man, from the comments I have seen here, I hate myself right now for being so weak and spineless.

Sonnobax15:

Imagine you can't give the mother who birthed you 5k but you were able to give one woman 5m simply because she's your wife . Bro,the only pain I've got right now is that I'm sharing the same masculinity with you .

Boss, things were tough, i stated that i sold my land before i could raise the 5m that i gave to her to start up a business. Nevertheless, you're somewhat right, It doesn't make any sense logically, giving my wife 5m and not being able to help my mom with 5k, most especially the treatment for her leg she's been battling for years.

zyzxx:
Go and take good care of your mother, don't do what you will regret

You can give your wife 5m, you can't get your monter a smart phone, bro you aren't making sense



She took your mum phone for what reason! Bro! (Abeg, she don get 5m, collect the phone today and give your mother) That's selfishness ejor

I don't care what goes on between you and your wife, but whatever little that mama can enjoy for the reward of her labor, pls, don't deprive her...

Don't do what you will regret

Peace out

In all my life and day to day existence, I have never seen this level of selfishness ever before. Most painful thing is the fact that she's very manipulative, each time I brought up the fact that the phone i bought for my mom she hijacked it to herself and refused to give me her older phone to give to my mom, it always end up in endless quarrel and more manipulative talks... The thing just dey pain me this evening, when i sit down dey think am.

sholatech:
Sadly, even though we are not taught, this behavior is quite common with wives in this part of the world and husbands need wisdom and patience to handle these unexpected painful behaviors from our wives. She is highly territorial and wants to be highly superior to your mother and doesn't want your mother to know any of her secrets or weaknesses that can be used against her in the future should she misbehave

The bolded above seem to be one of the answers I've been looking for, i get it now.

Stephen0mozzy:
Far be it from me to speak ill of another man's wife.
But I have a few questions Sir, before I say that "Na as you lay your bed, na so you dey lie ontop am so".


1. Was she idle before marriage? Were you the one that asked her to quit whatever she was doing when you got married?
2. Was she the one that requested for this money to start the business? (If NO, sorry, that money will loss, just FACT).
3. Has she shown past behaviour of "resentment" towards your family? Does she feel the need to be in competition with them for your love and wealth?
4. How long did you let this lady understand your personality before you married her? (I'm asking because when people do not understand what will make you angry, they'll do it and think you're overreacting - i.e borrowing out 1.5m for money intended for a business, and locking the remaining in piggyvest, while continuing being IDLE! Instead of putting things in motion post haste).

Take your time, to answer, your response will also give other Nairalanders context to answer you better.

1....she was completely idle before marriage, still in OND 2

2....She's the one that requested for the money, it's been a while, so i had to sell my land and finally give her the money to start up something.

3....She's always in that competition, most especially the love i have for my younger brother "our last born"


4....she got pregnant while we were dating, she pleaded with me regarding the marriage and i refused, until I couldn't any longer, that's when I agreed, and we planned and got married two months later, before the pregnancy popped out.


Bonus answer, she newly gave birth, 3 months ago, that's why she's insisting on waiting until December.

Also, she didn't tell inform me before borrowing her friend the said amount immediately I sent the money to her.

Good afternoon nairalanders, It's been 2 years and 6 months since i got married to my wife. She have been completely idle since then, recently i gave her 5m to start up a business, in which she told me she'd start it up by December. The very evening i sent her the money "not less than 5 minutes" she borrowed her friend 1.5m from it to boost her business and locked the rest on her Piggyvest, pending December that she'd be starting up her business. It's been almost a month since i gave the money for business.

Yesterday Sunday, i went to see my mom and we were just discussing randomly "i and my mom" then the discussion let to me telling my mom that i gave my wife money for business, in which i couldn't even disclose the amount. Because my mom have been bugging me for 5k for weeks now to send to her mom that's in the village, but i haven't been able to give her yet because things really seem so hard for me this period, so i couldn't really disclose the amount,

I sold my land, pocketed 1m and gave her the balance 5m to start up the business.


Today, i opened up up to my wife that my family is aware that i gave her money for business and she have been very mad angry and furious. Claiming that how could i tell my family that i gave her money, asking me that if she's the one that gave me money, if she would then start announcing to her family that she gave me money.


I responded by letting her know that, firstly... Her assertion is not possible bcus there's no way she'd give me money, and secondly a man telling his family that he gave his wife money and a woman doing the same thing are two different things entirely, the weight of the words are not the same.

Note : last year i bought fridge for her mom 350k and no single soul in my family knew, until this very hour, i sent her mom 70k too, in which the highest amount i have ever sent my own mom is 50k, I have bought her 5 phones in a space of two years.


Also, my mom have been dreaming of using an android phone ever since, and i eventually bought her a phone, but before even surprising her, my wife said she liked the phone and she took it and started using it, i told her to give me her older phone so I can give my mom and until date she refused, she's still using both phones until this very moment and my mom is using a touch light phone that she bought with her own money from her little savings. It's been almost a year now and i have only brought up the issue twice about her hijacking phone the phone that I bought for my mom, all to herself knowing fully well that It'd make my mom happy because she have been dreaming of using an android phone, the two times i brought up the issue it doesn't always end up well, it's always endless quarrel.



I just want to know if her behaviour is normal, or I'm i the one not seeing anything bad in what i did? Because this girl have manipulated me to the point that I have started seeing every ordinary little thing as a big deal, all thanks to her. How can a normal human being get angry because a man told his mom that he gave his wife money to start up a business. I really want to know if I'm the one seeing all of these in a wrong way or if she's right.

Na wa ooooo, nothing person nor go see for this life. I nor sure say this kind record dun ever exist ever before.

oluwaseyi0:
Whose number

It's regarding the comment, I circled on the screenshot below.

Privatepart00:
You can drop WhatsApp let me message you
First go to www.possap.gov.ng register your details then login with it to proceed

Calling you on phone for guidance might be better, as there's places you will encounter difficulties

Make sure your image quality of files to upload is at medium and below 2MB

You need strong network for it if you doing virtual verification capturing which is what I did

Midnight might be okay for you if network isn't strong in your area

Hello sir, good afternoon sir. Sir, I'm already on it, but I'm stuck regarding where it was stated that I should provide "reason for inquiry"

One option says "medical and another says "security" and another says "factory fitted"

I'm yet to tint my vehicle, I just want to get the tinted permit first, to avoid police problems.

Please sir, my WhatsApp number Is 07071014356

Cutezt:
Please watch these videos and follow the steps

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DO-orAGjf1m/?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DMPscAjucop/?igsh=MTc4MmM1YmI2Ng==

Thank you very much sir, I will do that right away.

Nteogwuija:
Go to possap.gov.ng

Thank you very much sir, I would do that right away.

Hello sir, please I need her number.

oluwaseyi0:
100k?
I paid 50k and additional 5k for non appearance

Hello sir, good afternoon sir. Sir, how can I pay same amount for non appearance, please sir I need your response sir, please.

Privatepart00:
Something that took me 72 hours to apply and get mine

All done at the comfort of my room by myself

2850 for VIN verification
14250 for the tinted permit itself
Virtual verification no hassle of going to state police command to queue.

I was guiding others on how to do theirs freely
It was sent to my mail, I printed it

Hello sir, good afternoon sir. please sir, how can I do it by myself?.

Cutezt:
I did it myself, I didn't even spend up to 20k, and I did it right from the comfort of my home, delivered to my mail.

Hello sir, good afternoon sir. please sir, how can I have it done by myself?

bobbiiee:
If it was factor-fitted tint, you have done give away. Mine cost about 20k. I also assisted 3 people in doing theirs.

Hello sir, good afternoon sir. Please sir, how can I have mine done? I haven't tinted my car windows yet, but I intended to, but I want to get the permit first, please how much would it cost, since it's not factory tinted. And how do I go about it,

Nteogwuija:
Dem don scam u be that. If you did it yourself, you'd have spent around 25k.

Hello sir, good afternoon sir. please sir, how can I do it by myself?

Ojukwu4real:
Please where can someone find this thick nylon to wrap my car seats? The ones I have been seeing around my area is not thick at all,it’s just like ordinary nylon

Anyone's wrapping up car seat should have the think nylon, just that it's more expensive like the regular soft one's that tear very easily.

lilvicky68:
WOW, imagine your mechanic telling you to drive it like that 😂.

Yea, that’s what he told me, I didn’t revolt or complain because my papers are not yet out, I barely or rarely drive the car, I’m still waiting for my papers to fully be available and complete before testing and driving long distance, to ascertain If the car is worth letting go of my older Camry or not.

Ojukwu4real:
Wow
Are you for real?

Yes, 100%
Also, whenever the car is in reverse, it normally makes a loud cranking noise, which wasn’t there before, until I changed the head gasket few days ago.

Ojukwu4real:
@OP any updates concerning your car?

Yea, after successfully changing the head gasket, the car has developed another fault entirely.


Park is now reverse, drive is now neutral, neutral Is now park. My mechanic told me that the problem is from a pipe, I really couldn’t understand, but I’m praying for it to be rectified. My mechanic told me to drive it like that until he’s fully chanced, that he has so many work at hand.

I couldn’t wait so I took it to another mechanic , and it’s working at it right now as I’m typing, I pray it’s possible for it to be rectified and for everything to go back to normal, this Is my prayer right now.

OZIOGU1:
Una dey try ooo, una sabi take rubbish, so person wey no dey pay bills dey threaten person wey dey pay bills? Nawa

Boss he shock you?? God forbid bad thing, Omo…some men Dey tolerate sha.

Kelvin247Gold:
To cut the long story short, let her leave. She's determined to leave. You don't beg a woman to stay in a marriage. She will learn her lesson wherever she goes.

And she will learn it the hard way, wishing she could turn back the hands of time, this is a fact that can never be erased.

Nicoddemus:
How did you even tolerate her to have grown wings up to this extent. Allow that stupid woman to go for now her brains will reset after some time. Maybe you can take her back with stringent rules

Gbammmm, you’ve said it all.

Cooljavs:
This guy is just catching cruise, don’t take him seriously.

If I’m catching cruise, then make life nor ever Favour me until the day I die. Make life nor ever better for me, if I Dey catch cruise.

Kingoftrust:
What's the update on d car though

It would be ready today, against Wednesday that I was told, they’re coupling it right now.

tosyne2much:
This should be a cruise

You went to buy a car of 12m without a mechanic? You also made full payment without testing the car?

Do you pluck money on the tree?

I don’t boss, I was in a haste and completely Impatient, reason I’m bitterly regretting right now.