₦airaland Forum

Wildwater, i feel for you. Let me say its not a cultural thing and it might be far from jealousy. Since u'v met some of his ppl n u r ok wt dem bf u married him, respect d level of access he is allowing u wt ppl around him. He is probably scared of something he believes can destroy wat both of u share, dont let ur curiosity drive u into avoidable problems. Good luck dear.

@Babe! Hmmm, thanks for d insight, @Mynd, u seem to hv built a wonderful opinion of 9ja gals - i never of ur 'no-money' talks! Besides who knows, Louis Val seems to be up trend type - who probably hardly meets gals like d type u described or finks money is not something he cannot handle,

@Poster, Not just Nigerian women - Africans. Its in our culture n ways, for a woman to act so. Then instinctively, women know u value them more when u work hard to earn their attention. Besides, every woman likes to be wooed n not picked up like something u can easily drop.

Sorry for d break, still on d matter
4. I love u: oh (hissing), even a baby gal will be like 'really (hisses)'.
5. You look so much like my ex: do this, but make sure u run across d enemy line u just drew.
Guess u got d gist, ladies u can share ur tots also (winkes).

Brothers, I have a list of 5 no-nos talk with 9ja gals. I coiled it from one Louis Val' articles,
Mr Val is d author of 'How To Hook And Date A Rich Nigerian Girl' ebook.

Please read, digest if you can and just ignore it if doesn't make any sense to you.

Note: no insults or trade of words is welcome under dis post!

Lets have them,
1. You are too beautiful: she is tired of hearing dis, beside you are only trying to score some points.
2. I just want to be your friend: It sounds mysterious and cunning!
3. I can give you whatever you want: What if she asks you to give her a break?

@Pendo89, ''Act more n talk less. Her heart will start warming up'' - i'm crazy about dis advice. Most guys do a lot of talking, becos we blv dem gals luv to hear gud things - but dis is losing its potency wt so many lies in d air.
@Long one, i fink u shud kneel n ask God, mayb u'l hook Pendo89. She is smart, probably beautiful n sounds romantic. Pls stop dis scripture-smart talks n ask her out on a date (online)
@Safo n Mzdarkskin, hmmmm
@Claremont, guys líke you n 190smh often care (ñö öff€ñ߀ m€äñt)

Some of u guys r better of on 2go, so damn anti-social, insultive, rude n lame. Cant we all hv some positive conversations n make some friends while doing so?
Its is un-african to crucify ethics, courtesy n self-respect, mayb b because we use pseudonyms here or maybe because of a socially detoriorating world.
Words can be dangerous- u cud hurt someone f life!

Thanks guys for your views,

But i have always heard human relations expert advise that paying genuine compliment to a lady helps u score some point, when she senses that you mean what you are saying, i wonder y it might not work with a model - can a woman ever be satisfied with compliments?

I guess models spend so much time on their looks so that people can appreciate or admire them, why is telling them the obvious not a good slash of the axe?

@Pleeps, just saw the link, of d video
http://www.facebook.com/pages/HookNDate9jaRichGalsTips/179060598831185#!/pages/HookNDate9jaRichGalsTips/179060598831185?sk=wall

pendo89:
This thread makes sense to me.

I find it hard to be convinced.I feel sorry for some men who tell me they love me cz my 'doubt' button is always activated. [s]_{Maybe if they turn into some angel} [/s]

This is what op. most men just talk and talk and talk. Women want action cz they speak louder than words.
Since men are used to deceiving,women became clever and now even the good ones that u truly love find it hard to believe you because they were deceived by a guy.
Its a cycle actually.What goes round comes around.

@pendo89, I get it, guys and their deception is responsible. So what happens to d good ones – a woman’s love is so damn hard to win today. Thanks for your views sha.

ice234:
because the one u don't love is already into u and dying for u. So anything u say she believes

@Ice234, I doubt dat truly, not all girls u don’t love, actually wants you,

rokiatu:
@Poster, maybe you ain't showing it through your action.

@Rokiatu, b damn sure I’d do to both a woman I love and don’t really love what I could, but u end up impressing the one u don’t love easily and pissing off d one u really love

(Lol) Babe! Gud kisser? Na na, i dont want to b d bad guy, u hit d gavel so hard on my case, i can barely hear ur question. Mrs Chima et al, hmmm!

M M M:
alot of sh-it in romance section dis dayz

Why not eat d much ur big mouth can chew n find some where else to throw up? Stop acting like a sad boy, u r online! Leave what u cant contribute to ppl who know enof to.

@Mrbrownjay, i guess it makes simple sense not telling her what about telling her something wierd or unexpected? @ pleeps, sorry i dont hv d link but it is a recent post ''hookndate9jarichgalstips'' wall, maybe u shud search d term on fb. @MMM, abi! U don finish wt bhusayor for d other post?

dammytex:
@op;

I don't think so.

Me too, just trying to get Babe! Clearere, so can u tell us what u think about d 'myth'

****frowning****Why r d 'Mr Cork' types all over NL?

BABE!:
**chuckles** Yes, It's true. Very true.

Bad kisser means he's not gonna cheat on you.

Averagely good kisser means he's gonna be horrible in bed.

Good kisser means he's gonna dump unexpectedly.

Uh, so gud kissers r bad market, hmmh?

Is it true that a woman can tell how a relationship will go and the type of man you are from your first kiss?

Why is it harder to convince a woman you truly love that you love her, than to deceive one you dont really love?

Guys i just watched dis video by an american model, she shared five tips on hooking n dating an intl model,

What tripped me most was tip #3 where she said 'dont tell her she is beautiful'' instead tell her something she is not use to hearing - mayb something wierd and unexpected. Do u guys agree?
Full video is on facebook's fan page (hookndate9jarichgalstips).
That video has some strangely-true tips.

@Poster, i think u'r r just being sarcastic with d first and last pointers. There is an element of truth in the second. Maybe u should also add, they usually carry very big handbags. No time to leave anything behind on any move. @Mr Cork, u really need to grow up. Why is everything comedy to you? And then, u r always on nairaland posting rubbish - dont u hv something doing?

First, let me point out that the subject of your post is wrong. She is a former boss of Nigeria Stock Exchange (NSE) not SEC. Then i read people praising her come back. While it is right and necessary that the law seeks orderliness, we must not forget that she had done things that should disqualify for the job. She oversaw the premature deflation and inflation of many stocks - makin herself a stock goddess of a sort. She tried to manipulate the market barring demäñd ñ ßüpp£y fröm döíñg th€ír jöbß.

Mr Cork, don't be a dumb ass, you want me to take you where you will meet a dozen? There are fantastic generation money; i mean old money nigerian girls in the country, Flow with the trend and you will meet great ones.

If you have dated any Nigerian rich girl you will probably know some of the reasons why i love dating them.
These girls keep you on your toe, with each moment with you reminding you of how far you still need to go.

They have this swag that simply overwhelms you and when they rob off that swag on, you get litted

Anyway guys, just a minute,

@WackyJ1, I have written to help the ladies deal with a cheating mate not to curb or fight the spread of HIV – I have a project for that. Besides, that was just an instance; there are other weird mines she can plant in her husband’s field.

@My Kali, Nigerian guys and men are humans with emotions (Fear, Shame, Anger, Love etc); it all depends on how you apply my recommendations. The idea is to pull off the rug from his foot and give him a shoulder to hold back on. About knowing when she starts acting funny…it wouldn’t even cross your mind. Instead you will think nemesis has caught up on you or that your sins are being revisited. Trust me

@Gbomo, that's just wierd.
@Wacky, that's if you ever discover, if she is gud it will work naturally. Think about it: a cheating spouse can invite the virus into the home. Is it not better to be thought to have it when you dont have the HIV than to actually have it?

@Busy Body, them u dont have to worry about a cheating dude! Good for you, trust me.

Any man can cheat for any reason – you can even find those who do it just for fun; but for most men; cheating on their spouse is a game – a game of wits, smartness and a tussle of freedom…then you have those that are just being stupid! Now gals, you are most-def going to learn the how from this piece – it is not every day you get to read stuffs like this from a former chronic cheat, who at a point was a spouse to a devoted woman and yet had dozens of women to make out with!

This piece is more like a testimony than it is a self-help article but by the time you are through with it, you must have learnt some of the world’s most guided secrets of proactive seduction and vengeful persuasion. Now you don’t have to believe any of my recommendations; just try them out, after all: if they fail, your guy still remains a cheat (no offense intended) – at least you got a chance.

But let me warn you and probably help you with a resolution I stumbled upon on the internet: “the truth is that there is really nothing you can do to stop your man from cheating. No matter how much you fret or check up on him, if a man wants to cheat, he will”. Now I guess you are wondering, ‘so, why the title; a hype?’ Not really; what most women do is to tell (and they usually have so many ways of doing this) their men to stop cheating on them. This hardly helps matters for these guys just go on and do the opposite! So the tips in this article are a little out of the ordinary but they worked against me; not only am I now devoted to my woman, I’m working towards helping women like you curb guys like the former me.

The first thing you need to do is: let your man know you are aware he is cheating on you; and that you can’t waste a puff for that. The urge to cheat is promoted by deception and the desire to deceive; when he knows you know and don’t mind, he can only last a while as a cheat. Especially when he can’t figure out what is cooking up in your mind. Some guys, at this point, will start thinking you are even into the game with them and the fear of the unknown will eventually freak them out and into paying more attention to; and guide you more closely. But hey, you need to see the red button on this: If he thinks rather that you are just being weak or scared of opposing him; then you have yourself a situation. You must convince him you don’t really care; both for what he is doing and for what he thinks about your indifference.

The next tip is a little bit weird. I say: if you know his fields, go there and plant mines that will discourage his team mates from running around with him. For instance; if he sleeps around with women at his place of work; plant a rumour in his block that he is HIV positive or has some very scary STDs. Make sure he can’t trace this rumour to you, then sit back and watch; in fact people around will start pitying you and his mates will fly for their lives. You can also get contract seductress to lure him, and scare the hell out of his life. She can blackmail him against someone he fears, or another who respects him or even an institution he might be scared to show that aspect of his life to. When all this gets on his nerves he will run to you and hold on; as you are supposedly the only woman who can protect him. Be glad to welcome him like a prodigal son!

Now you know he is a cheat; the next thing is for you to find out why he is cheating on you. Are you denying him something; or is he just insatiable? Are his friends responsible for this? Could you tell if he had always been like that – may be you knew but decided to manage him, hoping you will change him? Is he trying to get your attention; or is he drowning in the much you are providing? Or worst still is he just a perpetual cheat…an uncommitted brute? Whatever; when you find out why, stop everything you are doing that had encouraged or is encouraging his habit.

To be continued on www.lovebirdsguide..com

Have you ever wondered why things aren’t going the way they should or the way you expected when you decided to hook up with your spouse? I mean, it’s been like ages since you saw the sun rise on your hitherto rosy, perfectly romantic relationship…or maybe it was never that good, and you can’t just place your fingers on the WHY! Do you find it hard to point out where things started off wrong, and even when you seriously wish it all goes back fine, you find your hands so tied you can’t even make any move? If you do, then you need to stick your eyes on your screen for a few minutes more…I think I can help you with some good tips.

[b]First, I need you to ask yourself the following questions:[/b]

1. What got me into this relationship?
2. Why was I so convinced I could get the above from this relationship?
3. What was I willing to share with or sacrifice for my spouse when I decided to hook up with him or her?
4. How much have I done to fulfill these things in 3 above?
5. What do I want from my spouse now?
6. What does my spouse want from me now?
7. Does my spouse have what it takes to give me what I want now?
8. Do I have what my spouse wants from me now?
9. Have I told my spouse what I want from him or her presently?
10. Does my spouse know what I want from him or her presently?

You don’t have to rush these questions, just be sincere with yourself and get the answers written down.

However let me point out that you need a more defined answer for each question, for instance in the first question; it will not be helpful to say you got into your present relationship because of ‘love’ – I tell you almost everybody do or at least – think they do! You need to define instead, what you thought finding love will do for you.

The second item on my menu is a simple task;

I need you to send a copy of these questions to your spouse, tell them your purpose first and then, invite them to discuss your answers and theirs with you. You will be surprised at how much you never knew about yourselves and very possibly, you could set a stage for a better and more matured relationship with your Romeo or Juliet.
Check out lovebirdsguide..com for more tips
Good Luck Guys and Gals!

@Cuteisbela, I feel your fears and i know what it feels like to be unsure but hopeful. You can actually help your self with an exercise I just posted on Nairaland. read 10 FANTASTIC QUESTIONS THAT CAN SAVE YOUR RELATIONSHIP! I wrote it just for you!

1. She: “Is my bikini Beautiful, Musa?”
Almost every woman will rather choose to wake up from a Dracula nightmare and meet Obasanjo giggling beside her in bed than not hear her man tell her how cute she looks, after she had done well to make him wonder at how lucky he is to have a woman with her looks. Some guys self?? They are just too blunt; they can’t feel it and they can’t even see it. She needs you to tell her she is beautiful; she probably spent hours at the mirror…she didn’t mind – it was all about you, her man and baby. Then you come up just mopping or probably pretending not to see what God had placed in your hands, until she had to ask for your opinion!

2. Emeka: “But I love you more than I love her!”
Some women can get their hearts “jacked” with the faintest thought of sharing their man. Any woman (not sure of Muma G oh!) could share their makeup kit and even wears; some can even give up their jewelry to an enemy; but very few (if they exists at all) can bear the thought of borrowing their man even to a sister – whether of the womb or in the lord; talk more of share him. However, when poo happens – like it always does, (a) they rather pretend it never did, (b) decide not to believe, (c) better still, believe it won’t happen again or (d) more complicated, all of the above. Those options are better (for some) than accepting they are sharing their man – a very scary fate. It doesn’t change much even when you try to get to understand how much better you love them.

3. Jude: “Baby! [Yes!], You don’t cook well”
Somebody once told me that you could make a fantastic cook out of a woman-concoctionist (need the word for a second please) if you just find something good to say about her pot art, which would normally pass for a poison-of-a-meal. Now, I have observed that irrespective of an infamous disposition towards the pot and its content, no woman wants to be labeled a bad cook. I don’t think you want to keep telling her how bad she cooks. You don’t want her thinking that living with you was a nightmare, do you?

4. Brother: “Sister please Meet Mr. Wrong”
Meeting Mr. Right use to be something of an obsession for girls; In fact, back then when women were girls, any girl could describe to you a digital picture of her dream dude even if she had just been woken up.  They are very good at that – just as they as so bad at meeting Mr. Wrong. If you just said “Permit me to introduce you to Mr. Wrong!” and then peep into her mind to see what was cooking, you will almost knock over a portrait with lucifer’s horns, Busta’s Mouth, Mr. Beans eyes, Great Khali’s leg, Mr. Ibu’s belly…I mean you could bump into a beast in her mind when she hears you say Mr. Wrong; even if you had mentioned wrong without the ‘r’. Funny enough some girls grow up still having the “my-prince-to-the-rescue’s” picture in their mind.

You probably have read or heard alot of things about our girls that have strained your reflexes and emotional sensibility towards them. However, I want you to know that 9ja girls are as cool as white chicks; and even less complicated than them. Though they may appear intimidating because of the pressure of the society on their dignity and womanhood, they are still easy-going inside. You have to change you beliefs and dont think it much of an ado to hang out with them.

Ok? Don't bother about the hash rebukes you got for expressing yourself, we Nigerians don't like it when people come out clean and straight. Good Luck

Most men can camouflage their love for you, but somethings can't be shielded for long. They are natural pointers and with time, they will establish the blushing from the harty-harty.

Here are some tips to help you find out if your man loves you. He loves you …

1. If he respects you
It is difficult for a man to disrespect you if he loves you. Men who are in love don’t neglect or abuse their lover.
2. If he is proud to show off with you
Men are creatures of pride. They take glory in showing off what they perceive as important and hold at high esteem. Don’t be deceived if he says “I thought it might be too demanding asking you to join me visit my friend, parent…blah blah”.
3. If he feels at home whenever he is with you
Men hardly give up their self. There is always that urge to hold back a part of them. So when your man feels very relax and back home around you, he probably has some plans for you both.
4. If he always tries to impress you
Guys are only good at putting up their best before they catch you. However, if they continue that way long after you have given them a chance then they love, or at least regard you highly.
5. If he is always excited to discuss your future together
The beauty of a future with you, for a man who truly loves you, can be very exciting to him. If he is passionate about his plans for both of you, it is more likely, he wants to be with you.
6. If he doesn’t mind time when he is with you
A man that is willing to share his time with you would share anything with you including his heart. He knows how importantly you need his attention and so wouldn’t deny it from you.
Though some time you might have a man that cannot meet up with the six, but that doesn’t mean he is not in love with you. However, in summary, you can tell if your man still loves you through the way he treats you and feels whenever he is around you.

Mr-Cork,  its seems you have a complex; I suggest you go see a psychologist. Don't be paranoid! This is the digital world; is not fit for Racism and stereotypical theorems.

And What kinda of a name is "Mr.Cork" anyway?